Ridiculous Conversations

[moosemalibu]

If it wouldn't have been a waste of your cake I could've thought of a better place for it to go That's her problem and her social awkwardness, though. 

Someone on here mentioned the thing where people get vegan and gluten free confused... Happened to me at New Year! After the poor girl had gone to the effort of making vegan brownies too :\ 

 

This happens to me all the time by the same person at my work. He manages the department next door. And he always tries to tell me about the vegan restaurant he drives by on his commute. And each time I explain to him that I am not vegan, I cannot eat gluten! Drives me nuts!

[Adalaide]

I posted that I made red velvet cupcakes in another thread. I took those red velvet cupcakes to my sisters Dove Chocolate Party that she was having. I knew from the get-go that there was nothing safe for me to eat there. I looked through the catalog and much of it had the wheat allergen warning. So anyway- you meet all different sorts of people at these parties. (Which I hate these types of parties - the only reason I went is because my best friend wanted to go and I haven't seen her since Friendsgiving in November) Anywho - I was offering them out to the guests and one girl whom I hadn't met before wrinkled her nose and said 'those are gluten free?' and I said 'yes' and she said with the snootiest voice ' I guess I can try one. '

 

RUDE much! Everyone else was happy to eat one or more and told me they couldn't even tell the difference. But that girl.. she just had that rude attitude. I'm over it but I did notice the social awkwardness.

 

I hate people like that! I'd have been tempted to tell her to kiss the fattest part of my red velvet cupcake enhanced arse. (I've said similar things in the past on my snarky days when people get under my skin.)

[LauraTX]

Yes!!!! I cannot stand when people will turn their nose up at gluten-free food, it is completely insulting.  I have learned to not mention it is gluten-free unless it is someone you are already close to.  I made a bunch of pumpkin cookies for my sisters halloween party- told her not to label them gluten-free and she did.  NO ONE ATE THEM.  I was P.O'd.  We also have a friend who lives about 40 minutes away and we always meet him halfway for a meal, he said he didn't want to meet for dinner so he did not have to eat weird food.  I replied, "Well, we will eat at -favorite great local steakhouse- without you then!"  Ignorance is no excuse for rudeness, though.  I listed off all kinds of things and asked him if he liked them- M&ms, french fries, steak, mashed potatoes, potato chips, ice cream, sausage, hot dogs- and when he said yes I was like "THAT IS gluten-free!" and maniacally laughed.  Normally I wouldn't go psychotic like that but he is like a brother to me and he had made me extra mad.

 

I like to give feed people gluten-free stuff and then ask them after they ate it and tell me how delicious it is, if they could tell if was gluten-free.  I do that to remind them that gluten-free does not equal gross, healthy, whatever other preconceived notions they may have.  A few weeks back I had an internet/phone technician at my house for 3 hours dealing with line problems and stuff, and I had made cookies because I was bored so I gave him one.  He raved about how good they are and then I asked him if he could tell they were gluten-free and he was blown away.  Turns out his best friend is a celiac.  

 

Moose if I lived near you I would have shown up on your doorstep trying to bum some red velvet cupcakes!

[moosemalibu]

I hate people like that! I'd have been tempted to tell her to kiss the fattest part of my red velvet cupcake enhanced arse. (I've said similar things in the past on my snarky days when people get under my skin.)

Hehe!! I wish I could have said something like that... but it wasn't the right time or place. But the hostess of the party did ask me a bunch of questions about being gluten free... and then asked the whole did you get diagnosed by biopsy question and then was like 'oh so you are legitimately Celiac?' and I'm like... yeah but even if I didn't who are you to judge? Whatevs. It was an interesting lesson in tolerance.

 

Yes!!!! I cannot stand when people will turn their nose up at gluten-free food, it is completely insulting.  I have learned to not mention it is gluten-free unless it is someone you are already close to.  I made a bunch of pumpkin cookies for my sisters halloween party- told her not to label them gluten-free and she did.  NO ONE ATE THEM.  I was P.O'd.  We also have a friend who lives about 40 minutes away and we always meet him halfway for a meal, he said he didn't want to meet for dinner so he did not have to eat weird food.  I replied, "Well, we will eat at -favorite great local steakhouse- without you then!"  Ignorance is no excuse for rudeness, though.  I listed off all kinds of things and asked him if he liked them- M&ms, french fries, steak, mashed potatoes, potato chips, ice cream, sausage, hot dogs- and when he said yes I was like "THAT IS gluten-free!" and maniacally laughed.  Normally I wouldn't go psychotic like that but he is like a brother to me and he had made me extra mad.

 

I like to give feed people gluten-free stuff and then ask them after they ate it and tell me how delicious it is, if they could tell if was gluten-free.  I do that to remind them that gluten-free does not equal gross, healthy, whatever other preconceived notions they may have.  A few weeks back I had an internet/phone technician at my house for 3 hours dealing with line problems and stuff, and I had made cookies because I was bored so I gave him one.  He raved about how good they are and then I asked him if he could tell they were gluten-free and he was blown away.  Turns out his best friend is a celiac.  

 

Moose if I lived near you I would have shown up on your doorstep trying to bum some red velvet cupcakes!

I was going to highlight the parts that I wanted to respond to but it's all worthy! My coworker (the same one that initiated my blog post) seriously does not like healthy food. She doesn't like fruit really, she only eats vegetables with cheese/fried/butter and she is a soul-food and soda person on the day to day. When I used to make regular cupcakes I would make them with spelt flour and not tell her because otherwise she would turn her nose up. She never knew..haha! But she thought gluten free was going to be healthy and gross and I've educated her and most of my department (we're a small bunch of 8). But the preconceived notions are hard to combat. So irritating. I would have been so PO'd if my food wasn't eaten. I love feeding people. It's one of the things that makes me happy. Someone comes to my house, I give them food. I go to parties, I bring food. It's someones birthday, I bring food.

 

And I wish I had a celiac friend to share my cupcakes with. I know it means more to them than the average person. I'd bake you a batch just because I know you'd appreciate them!

[Dianaw]

I was diagnosed with Celiac a week after Christmas.  So far my coworkers have been asking me if I can eat fruits, vegetables, and meat.  Pretty much anything that ISN'T naturally gluten free.  Nearly everyone in my family has asked me if I will or have lost weight because so and so went on a gluten free diet and lost weight.  Or they tell me that it's okay to eat the turkey because not all of it touched the stuffing or a little bit won't hurt me once I heal.  Then I have friends who keep telling me it's "not a big deal.  There are lots of gluten free options."  Most are trying to be understanding but don't get that this is forever.

[Adalaide]

I was diagnosed with Celiac a week after Christmas.  So far my coworkers have been asking me if I can eat fruits, vegetables, and meat.  Pretty much anything that ISN'T naturally gluten free.  Nearly everyone in my family has asked me if I will or have lost weight because so and so went on a gluten free diet and lost weight.  Or they tell me that it's okay to eat the turkey because not all of it touched the stuffing or a little bit won't hurt me once I heal.  Then I have friends who keep telling me it's "not a big deal.  There are lots of gluten free options."  Most are trying to be understanding but don't get that this is forever.

 

Some of them get better. Some stay daft forever, I have one of those. What's funny is those same people who are all "it's no big deal" are sometimes the same ones who are carb addicts who may say in the same conversation "I'd die if I couldn't eat bread!" And you're just like no, I don't think you understand, I could die if I do eat bread. It's so frustrating, we all know! But remember, no matter how annoying they are, a celiac would never do well in prison. At the very least, we get better at handling the awkward questions which makes it easier.

 

Protip: when people ask if you'll lose weight look positively stricken and like you may break into tears at any moment then ask in a trembling voice "am.... am I that fat?" If you can actually manage a real tear or two on queue even better. No one in the room will ever mention weight again. (This isn't for everyone, I'm just evil. )

[LauraTX]

I have thought about that, too.  I never planned on it but I was watching one of those jail shows on TV one day and thought... Wow I better never go to jail, I would starve to death!  

 

The fat response is going into my book to use next time someone mentions gluten-free and weight loss.  LOL you have me cracking up!  And Dianaw, as time passes, it gets a little better.  Family and friends will learn a little more.  If you have stubborn ones you can print out some pages from the University of Chicago Celiac Disease research center website and/or just accept that they are a nitwit.  People think it is such a casual thing, oh yeah gluten-free no problem sure... they do not understand the seriousness of a food allergy.  When people say "Oh a little won't hurt you!" I always reply, "Would you feed peanuts to someone with a peanut allergy?  Would you feed sugar to a type 1 diabetic?"  And that hushes them up.

[GF Lover]

So....Hubs and I took his daughter out for our monthly dinner.  She gets to choose restaurant (I had to put my foot down at Golden Corral, just ugh) and she chose Cheddar's.  As usual I went prepared with snacks as we drive an hour away to meet her.  I go through my usual routine, ask if this sauce or dressing contain gluten and the practices.  The waitress comes back with a gluten-free menu with 6 items, I expected none so this was a plus.  I ordered the baby back ribs and steak combo with steamed vegies to split with Hubs.  The plate comes out and the steak and ribs are on top of a layer of fried onions (major sigh) I kindly told the waitress that I could not eat is because of the fried onions on the plate.  She say's "I'll check to see what they are fried in and sped away (another sigh)  So I wait and Oh Wow they are dipped in flour...duh (Sigh again)  Then the Chef comes out and very sincerely apologizes, says they were not supposed to put those on and he will whip me up some more ribs (Hubs had the steak part)  Needless to say, I asked for a to-go box for original ribs and additional ribs so kids at home could eat them and enjoyed a very large Margarita on the rocks while the others enjoyed their meals.  Now, I'm not a drinker but during these monthly dinners it is a staple as I have yet to actually eat anything but a head of lettuce...lol  

 

Colleen

[notme]

Protip: when people ask if you'll lose weight look positively stricken and like you may break into tears at any moment then ask in a trembling voice "am.... am I that fat?" If you can actually manage a real tear or two on queue even better. No one in the room will ever mention weight again. (This isn't for everyone, I'm just evil. )

LOLZ you *are* evil! 

 

addy, we would be arrested if we ever hung out together     if anybody ever asks me if i'm on the gluten-free diet to be (vegetarian, paleo, vegan, cleanse, <wthell, blah, blah misconception etc)  I WHIP AROUND with clenched teeth and say "what.  did.  you.  just.  ask.  me????"  

 

or......

 

"i traded in my chevy for a celiac-ac-ac-ac-ac-ac.  you oughta know by now............"  (adding - seriously, i have an auto-immune disease response to the protien in wheat, rye and barley, which means basically my body is attacking itself from inside my small intestines.  as a result, i can never eat or accidently ingest gluten because it makes me seriously ill and damages my body - oh, and i still have my chevy haha i'm not craaaaazy)

[Adalaide]

LOLZ you *are* evil! 

 

addy, we would be arrested if we ever hung out together     if anybody ever asks me if i'm on the gluten-free diet to be (vegetarian, paleo, vegan, cleanse, <wthell, blah, blah misconception etc)  I WHIP AROUND with clenched teeth and say "what.  did.  you.  just.  ask.  me????"  

 

or......

 

"i traded in my chevy for a celiac-ac-ac-ac-ac-ac.  you oughta know by now............"  (adding - seriously, i have an auto-immune disease response to the protien in wheat, rye and barley, which means basically my body is attacking itself from inside my small intestines.  as a result, i can never eat or accidently ingest gluten because it makes me seriously ill and damages my body - oh, and i still have my chevy haha i'm not craaaaazy)

 

Yeah, I've thought a few times that we'd be two regular peas in a pod. If we value our freedom we should probably continue keeping ourselves on opposite ends of the country. We could certainly raise some hell together though, and it would be fun until we got caught!

[Dianaw]

Thanks Adalaide and Laura.  I have a family Superbowl party and it will come up since I can't eat any of the food there.  I'll have to try out the sad face when asked about weight.

[Adalaide]

Don't forget to make sure there will be lots you can eat! And maybe bring your own dip because someone will always contaminate the dip. A-L-W-A-Y-S! And if you stab someone with a wing tomorrow because they make you mad, blame it on drinking too much. (You did buy gluten free beer, right?)

[w8in4dave]

I was supposed to make me something for The Super Bowl Game but I was sick the day b4 and didn't get to it! Pfftt! So I suffered watching everyone eat hubbs Corn and Gluten stuff! LOL It's ok I didn't eat a touch of it! 

What really really bothers me is a couple of Celiacs I know who purposefully eats or drinks something with Gluten in it. I just cannot grasp that in my brain! Do they not get what they are doing to them selves? Crazy! 

Was at a restaurant with a friend and we ordered a salad. The waiter asked if I wanted the the Honey Lime dressing that came with it. I said no thank you. My friend says "It's honey and lime!" "Why can't you eat it?" I said "because theres not Just "Honey and Lime" I am not going to eat a salad just to get sick on the dressing. 

[JodyM75]

I was diagnosed with Celiac a week after Christmas.  So far my coworkers have been asking me if I can eat fruits, vegetables, and meat.  Pretty much anything that ISN'T naturally gluten free.  Nearly everyone in my family has asked me if I will or have lost weight because so and so went on a gluten free diet and lost weight.  Or they tell me that it's okay to eat the turkey because not all of it touched the stuffing or a little bit won't hurt me once I heal.  Then I have friends who keep telling me it's "not a big deal.  There are lots of gluten free options."  Most are trying to be understanding but don't get that this is forever.

I love this thread, I hope it keeps going...

 

I am getting the same comments as you.  I was only diagnosed a week and a half ago (by biopsy, no bloodwork done yet) and everyone I've told has given me some form of "Oh, that'll be EASY!  There is so much in the grocery store that is labeled "Gluten Free" now!"  Which, ok, that may be true...but....EASY??  And I don't think anyone really gets the "forever" bit yet, too. 

 

Jody

[Monklady123]

Good thread. I was just thinking about these conversations the other day, when I had one of them on a message board I belong to. My favorites have already been mentioned here, but I'll just mention them again.

 

1. "My sister/cousin/whoever is coming for dinner and she's gluten free now. What can I cook?????!!!!!" or, a cousin to this question is "Oh I'm so sorry [when they hear I can't eat gluten] -- what can you eat now???!!!???!!!" (always said with all the drama of the exclamations). -- On my message board I always answer: "if you have no other food intolerances then you can eat everything that's not wheat, barley, or rye, and oats because of contamination." Then I start listing everything. hehehehe

 

2. Me, calling a new pizza place: "Hi, I'm wondering if you have a gluten free crust?" 

Pizza guy: "um.. glucose?"

Me: Thank you. {click, as I hang up}

 

3. Random person at my church: "I'm thinking of going gluten free because I want to lose weight. [insert eye roll from me] Do you have a good wheat bread recipe?"

Me: "um, wheat bread has gluten in it."

Random person: "No, I mean wheat. Not white bread."

Me: "um...." [omg]

 

4. Me at monthly soup dinner at church, to woman who brought chowder: "What are the ingredients in your chowder?"

Woman: "Oh it's safe for you -- potatoes, corn, milk, onions, salt and pepper."

Me: "That's it? Sounds good." 

Woman: "Yep, that's it. I knew it was safe for you."

Me: [because I wasn't born yesterday and I know how these things go...] "And did you thicken it with anything?"

Woman: "Yes, just a little bit of flour. But it's only a little bit in that big pot of soup, so it's okay."

Me: "um..." 

 

5. Single neighbor [i.e., no family to be cooking for]: "My doctor said he wants me to try going gluten free, but omg I don't know what to cook! It's so difficult to figure it all out! How do you do it?"

Me: "You know, it's really not at all difficult. Restaurants are harder, and parties too. But if you're cooking for yourself all you have to do is avoid wheat, barley, and rye. Cook anything else you want for yourself."

Neighbor: "Like what?"

Me: "um..."

 

Can you tell that I feel like I spend a lot of time saying "um..."? lol. 

 

But seriously, I understand that people don't understand about gluten. But I don't get it when people don't seem to realize that "white bread" is made from wheat just as much as "wheat bread" is. Really? do they think there's a grain called "white"? omg. 

 

And the ones who think that "just a little bit" won't hurt. 

Well, I'm past all that at this point. And I also don't care what other people think, and I don't care if I'm eating a salad and everyone else is eating a burger. And, I won't go to meetings in restaurants any more. We seem to have  a lot of people at my church, including the pastor, who want to meet at restaurants. But in addition to gluten it's usually too noisy for good conversation. So now I won't. My answer is always "it's okay, go ahead and have the meeting there. Let me know what you talked about." I'm always hoping that I'll be able to get out of the meeting, actually, but usually they have it at the church because "we want you there also." ugh.   

[NoGlutenCooties]

But seriously, I understand that people don't understand about gluten. But I don't get it when people don't seem to realize that "white bread" is made from wheat just as much as "wheat bread" is. Really? do they think there's a grain called "white"? omg. 

 

I had an otherwise very intelligent friend tell me that Italian bread was safe... because it's Italian, not wheat.  Apparently there is a grain called "Italian" too.  And it's gluten-free.

[Not crazy]

Besides all the usual

"I could never eat like that"

"So what is there left for you to eat"

"I would die if I had to eat gluten free"

This is my favorite. I can't even begin to try to type out the whole conversation but...

Apparently I was suppose to keep exposing myself to a little amount of gluten by eating out and not being so strict with it at home. So it's really all my fault that I'm sensitive to gluten for not continuing to expose myself to a little cc once in a while (even though cc symptoms were as bad as actually eating gluten). And if I expose myself to tiny amounts over time maybe I could build up a tolerance again and not be so sensitive to gluten anymore. Then I could eat out and allow gluten in my house.

I gave up trying to explain that's not the way it works.

[LauraTX]

When I was unexpectedly kept in the hospital overnight after getting my gallbladder taken out, I had a 45 minute drugged up conversation with the dietary supervisor to figure out what they could make me for dinner.  Everything on their end was great except them wanting to put my gluten-free bread in a gluteny toaster, but the conversation was probably ridiculous on her end because of poor little me on all these drugs they gave me trying to ask coherent questions.  Took a few minutes for each question to get out of my mouth, but I eventually covered all the bases!  

 

Me: "Ummm... sooooo... okay soooo um you DO have gluten free bread?  Wow .... uhhh....  well that's great so like, um.... yeahh.... ummmm.... sorry I was going to ask you something I have to think really hard right now on all these drugs... oh yeah do you put the gluten-free bread in the ummm whats it called... oh toaster... used for regular bread?"  

 

Her: "We don't have a gluten-free toaster so for the sensitive people we can put it on a plate and just heat it up with plastic wrap over it, would that be okay?"

 

Me:  "Wooooaaaahahhhh... ummm... yeaaaaaahhhhhhhh!  I love bread!!!!!   Ummmm.....  ummmmm...... yeah."

 

-repeat for 20 questions, 40 minutes later... haha