Jump to content

  • Welcome to Celiac.com!

    You have found your celiac tribe! Join us and ask questions in our forum, share your story, and connect with others.



  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A1):

    Celiac.com Sponsor (A1-M):

  • Get Celiac.com Updates:
    Support Our Content
    eNewsletter
    Donate

Dating and celiac disease

pdm1981

By pdm1981
in Coping with Celiac Disease

Recommended Posts

pdm1981 Collaborator
pdm1981
Posted

I am recently divorced and like most the people here, didn't always have celiac disease. I'm ready to get back out and start dating again but it is hard. I have no trouble talking to people and getting dates but then dinner comes up or snacks at the movies or drinks at a bar. celiac disease is probably my biggest challenge ever and it's asking a lot to ask someone to understand. It would be easier to find another person with celiac disease than to ask someone to also sacrifice things they enjoy too. I even tried the site Gluten Free Singles but there's no women within 150 miles. Anybody have any ideas or advice?

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):


kareng Grand Master
kareng
Posted

we have joked that GI doctors could introduce people.  

ironictruth Proficient
ironictruth
Posted

If you get on any of the traditional dating sites search for people who are into like Natural Foods, healthy alternative Lifestyles etc.  You might find some on certain sites that do not have Celiac but eat gluten free for other reasons. In fact I know someone who knows someone who eats gluten free because they have Hashimoto's disease. 

 you could even be upfront about it and say something in your description of yourself. And then mention something about how awesome of a cook you are. If you're not an awesome cook, then that you would like to learn how to bake gluten-free goods, or something. 

Good luck!

Ennis-TX Grand Master
Ennis-TX
Posted

I posted on several dating sites, I have mentioned the disease. Stated that I would prefer someone who eats gluten free, or is willing to change for it. -_- So far no fish., I am a tad broken but I am a very good cook, I OCD clean, and have my own place completely gluten free....OK very broken but still.

squirmingitch Veteran
squirmingitch
Posted
1 hour ago, ironictruth said:

If you get on any of the traditional dating sites search for people who are into like Natural Foods, healthy alternative Lifestyles etc.  You might find some on certain sites that do not have Celiac but eat gluten free for other reasons. In fact I know someone who knows someone who eats gluten free because they have Hashimoto's disease. 

 you could even be upfront about it and say something in your description of yourself. And then mention something about how awesome of a cook you are. If you're not an awesome cook, then that you would like to learn how to bake gluten-free goods, or something. 

Good luck!

Good ideas ironictruth has there. I will only add to search for people who have food allergies. They should understand.

pdm1981 Collaborator
pdm1981
Posted
  • Author

Good ideas but I'd be lying if I claimed to be a good cook. The natural foods is the best one so far I think. Right now I'm dating someone and I do sense a little frustration with her getting something to eat and me sitting there. I even tried bringing along a protein bar or something else but I think it still puts a damper on things. We'll see.

ironictruth Proficient
ironictruth
Posted

My boyfriend, I think gets bummed about not eating out. So i recently contacted a place  We both used to go to when I was eating out and asked them if it would be okay if I brought my own meal and explained the situation. They were totally fine with it. The waitress ended up being a little freaked out by the fact that  i wasn't ordering, like she was concerned, I felt like yelling surprise You are on Candid camera! 

 But I made myself a duck breast and some mashed sweet potatoes and then brought along a gluten-free cupcake.  my meal stayed warm because we went right after I heated it up and kept It in the cooler. Probably better if you bring along a salad. My boyfriend made sure to order an appetizer and a nice meal and dessert so that she would get a good tip. And we both enjoyed the wine.  it would not have worked if it was an extremely busy restaurant that didn't have a couple of tables that were tucked away. So I was able to be very discreet.

 

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):


Ennis-TX Grand Master
Ennis-TX
Posted
22 minutes ago, ironictruth said:

My boyfriend, I think gets bummed about not eating out. So i recently contacted a place  We both used to go to when I was eating out and asked them if it would be okay if I brought my own meal and explained the situation. They were totally fine with it. The waitress ended up being a little freaked out by the fact that  i wasn't ordering, like she was concerned, I felt like yelling surprise You are on Candid camera! 

 But I made myself a duck breast and some mashed sweet potatoes and then brought along a gluten-free cupcake.  my meal stayed warm because we went right after I heated it up and kept It in the cooler. Probably better if you bring along a salad. My boyfriend made sure to order an appetizer and a nice meal and dessert so that she would get a good tip. And we both enjoyed the wine.  it would not have worked if it was an extremely busy restaurant that didn't have a couple of tables that were tucked away. So I was able to be very discreet.

 

Done this, in most cases they have to let you bring your own meal to things like this or to theme parks, movies, etc. where they do not have safe food. If you have to bring food cause of a medical reason as long as your paying for something they normally let you. I sometimes go out to eat and just order a drink or something I know is safe (Raw Veggies) and bring my own meal, dips, etc. And lay out the napkin on the table and eat to feel like a normal human. I have gone on a date before to a theme park, and they let me bring in a cooler with our meals in it. I explained I have celiac and they just called someone over for a medical sticker which they stuck on my cooler and let me in with it. >.> it honestly saves money when you spend about as much getting in as you do on foods.

GFinDC Veteran
GFinDC
Posted

I have brought fruit and nuts on outings before. Or just ordered side dishes of veggies.  That is usually safe, although not always.  We have a texas Roadhouse in my area that has never made me sick.  Just ask them if they have gluten-free options, like steak!  There are other restaurants that do gluten-free menus also.  PF Changs is a Chinese chain that serves gluten-free food.  There are others also, like Ruby Tuesday.  In most cases it is wise to check with the restaurant ahead of time to verify they have a gluten-free menu, and understand the issue.  Some restaurants are real good, others might not be so aware.  You can try searching for restaurant info on this forum and see what comes up.  There is even a certification program for restaurants.  You can search it for gluten-free certified restaurants near you.  It's not a big list right now.  There is also an app called findme gluten-free that has gluten-free restaurant info.

Open Original Shared Link

Open Original Shared Link

cyclinglady Grand Master
cyclinglady
Posted
3 hours ago, pdm1981 said:

Good ideas but I'd be lying if I claimed to be a good cook. The natural foods is the best one so far I think. Right now I'm dating someone and I do sense a little frustration with her getting something to eat and me sitting there. I even tried bringing along a protein bar or something else but I think it still puts a damper on things. We'll see.

It can take a while for others to feel comfortable eating while you are not.  My family  and friends are now used to it.  I get a soft drin, water or a glass of wine.  

Back in my day (long before my celiac disease diagnosis), I caught many a beau by preparing a picnic.  It worked every single time.  It allowed for great conversation.  Held in in very public places until i got to know them.  My hubby was snared this way -- the hamper, wine glasses, chicken and brownies.  Seriously, we do continue to picnic, just gluten free!  

pdm1981 Collaborator
pdm1981
Posted
  • Author

The picnic idea is also a good one. I read the ideas about just ordering raw veggies that are prepared by a restaurant. I am an electrician and do service work in some restaurants around town and can honestly say that I'll never feel comfortable eating out after doing these jobs. Not because they're dirty, but because the clear cross contamination that takes place behind the scenes. I've seen it too many times and it just isn't worth it to me. I'll stick to my own food. It's not too romantic being bloaty and gassy for the rest of the night.

cyclinglady Grand Master
cyclinglady
Posted

You do not need to cook for a picnic.  Just get some gluten-free deli meat, a selection of cheeses, gluten-free crackers, fruit, hard boiled eggs, salad, veggies and hummus, gluten-free potato chips, chocolate....the list is endless.  The secret is presentation.  Nice platter, napkins,  plates, utensils and glasses.   A nice towel, blanket or chairs to sit on.  Flowers always help!  Even tiny hand-picked wildflowers.  Bring a wireless speaker for some tunes off your phone.  

GFinDC Veteran
GFinDC
Posted
6 hours ago, cyclinglady said:

You do not need to cook for a picnic.  Just get some gluten-free deli meat, a selection of cheeses, gluten-free crackers, fruit, hard boiled eggs, salad, veggies and hummus, gluten-free potato chips, chocolate....the list is endless.  The secret is presentation.  Nice platter, napkins,  plates, utensils and glasses.   A nice towel, blanket or chairs to sit on.  Flowers always help!  Even tiny hand-picked wildflowers.  Bring a wireless speaker for some tunes off your phone.  

You forgot the wine! :)

egs1707 Enthusiast
egs1707
Posted
On 28/11/2016 at 0:28 AM, pdm1981 said:

I am recently divorced and like most the people here, didn't always have celiac disease. I'm ready to get back out and start dating again but it is hard. I have no trouble talking to people and getting dates but then dinner comes up or snacks at the movies or drinks at a bar. celiac disease is probably my biggest challenge ever and it's asking a lot to ask someone to understand. It would be easier to find another person with celiac disease than to ask someone to also sacrifice things they enjoy too. I even tried the site Gluten Free Singles but there's no women within 150 miles. Anybody have any ideas or advice?

Know exactly where you're coming from, tried the gluten-free Singles site as well, even worse results for me... only 14 results for the entire country <_<

Restaurants aside from the celiac-certified ones (I'm the UK so they do an accreditation scheme) do seem to be a challenge but the cinema and bar should be more manageable. Fortunately there's a fair bit of "normal" gluten-free friendly crisps and chocolates for cinema and it seems cider is your best friend drinks-wise so I've been told.

Interestingly I've noticed beer always used to have really bad effects on me but cider doesn't, perhaps it was the gluten in there all along that was causing the issues and not the alcohol lol.

pdm1981 Collaborator
pdm1981
Posted
  • Author

There's a beer called glutenberg that is made in Canada I was going to order but haven't yet. If is supposed to be pretty good.

  • 4 months later...
lacey Contributor
lacey
Posted

I'm going through the same thing! It's quite a challenge and pretty discouraging. Perhaps you'll find a bit of comfort knowing you're not the only one ? Best of luck to you! Stay strong.

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Go to topic listing
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A19):


  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      131,857
    • Most Online (within 30 mins)
      7,748
    LowellFrancis
    Newest Member
    LowellFrancis
    Joined
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A20):

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      121.4k
    • Total Posts
      1m
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A22):



  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A21):


  • Upcoming Events

  • Posts

    • Rogol72
      Ibuprofen

      By Rogol72 · Posted

      Some interesting articles regarding the use of Zinc Carnosine to help heal gastric ulcers, gastritis and intestinal permeability. I would consult a medical professional about it's use. https://www.nature.com/articles/ncpgasthep0778 https://www.rupahealth.com/post/clinical-applications-of-zinc-carnosine---evidence-review https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC7146259/ https://www.fallbrookmedicalcenter.com/zinc-l-carnosine-benefits-dosage-and-safety/
    • Jillian83
      Celiac and dermatitis herpetiformis has taken Me from Me

      By Jillian83 · Posted

      He is. Which makes everything even more difficult. I’m not a believer in “staying for the kids” but I have nowhere to go and it’s not just me, it’s me plus my babies. We live in a beautiful place, lots of land in the country and me and the kids love the place we’ve called home for their entire lives. But Im seeing that he’ll never change, that my kids deserve a happy healthy Momma, and that staying in this as is will be the early death of me. Then I look at the scars covering my entire body…this disease and the chronic stress I’ve been enduring for years that tell me I’m no longer beautiful and no one will ever look at me with interest again. I try self care, try to give myself grace so I can just start loving myself enough to gain strength but the slightest sparkle in my eye and skip in my step attracts his wrath and it all comes crashing ten fold. Life is just absolutely railing me from every single direction leaving me wanting to wave that white flag bc I don’t feel like there’s much hope no matter what happens. 
    • trents
      Celiac and dermatitis herpetiformis has taken Me from Me

      By trents · Posted

      Is this man the father of your children?
    • Jillian83
      Celiac and dermatitis herpetiformis has taken Me from Me

      By Jillian83 · Posted

      Hi, I was recently diagnosed with Celiac and dermatitis herpetiformis after years of suffering without answers. I lost my mind. I lost my job. I lost so much time. I lost Me. Conventional doctors are opulent come near me and the one who did sat across the room, misdiagnosed me, pumped me full of steroids which collapsed my entire hip for 6 months. So without answers I began my holistic journey. Fast forward a couple of years and still struggling with a mysterious whole body itchy, crawling “skin hell”, perfect teeth now deteriorating, thick hair now thinning rapidly and no more than a day or 2 at most relief….An acquaintance opened up a functional medicine practice. Cash only, I found a way. Within a month tests clearly showing my off the charts gluten allergy/sensitivity as well as the depletion of vital nutrients due to leaky gut and intestinal damage. dermatitis herpetiformis was more than likely what I was experiencing with my skin. I was happy. I thought this is easy, eat healthy Whole Foods, follow the diet restrictions and I finally get to heal and feel confident and like myself again very soon! 😔 Supplements are very pricey but I got them and began my healing. Which leads to the other major issue: not working, stay at home Mom of young kids, entirely financially dependent on my man of 7 plus years. He’s never been supportive of anything I’ve ever done or been thru. He controls everything. I’m not given much money ever at a time and when he does leave money it’s only enough to possibly get gas. His excuse is that I’ll spend it on other things. So my “allowance” is inconsistent and has conditions. He withholds money from me as punishment for anything he wants. Since being diagnosed, he’s gained a new control tactic to use as punishment. He now is in control of when I get to eat. He asked for proof of my diagnosis and diet bc he said I made it up just to be able to eat expensive organic foods. Then after I sent him my file from my doctor he then said she wasn’t a real doctor. 😡. I go days upon days starving, sometimes breaking down and eating things I shouldn’t bc I’m so sick then I pay horribly while he gets annoyed and angry bc I’m not keeping up with all the duties I’m supposed to be doing. His abuse turns full on when I’m down and it’s in these desperate times when I need his support and care the most that I’m punished with silence, being starved, ignored, belittled. He will create more of a mess just bc I’m unable to get up and clean so that when I am better, I’m so overwhelmed with chores to catch up that the stress causes me to go right back into a flare from hell and the cycle repeats. I’m punished for being sick. I’m belittled for starving and asking for healthy clean water. I’m purposely left out of his life. He won’t even tell me he’s going to the grocery or to get dinner bc he doesn’t want me to ask him for anything. I have no one. I have nothing. Im not better. My supplements ran out and I desperately need Vitamin D3 and a methylated B complex at the very minimal just to function….he stares at me blankly…no, a slight smirk, no words. He’s happiest when im miserable and I am miserable.  this is so long and im condensing as much as I can but this situation is so complicated and disgusting. And it’s currently my life. The “IT” girl, the healthy, beautiful, perfect skin, perfect teeth, thick and curly locks for days, creative and talented IT girl….now I won’t even leave this house bc Im ashamed of what this has dont to my body, my skin. Im disgusted. The stress is keeping me from healing and I think he knows that and that’s why he continues to keep me in that state. He doesn’t want me confident or successful. He doesn’t want me healed and healthy bc then how would he put the blame of all his problems on me? This journey has been hell and I’ve been in Hell before. I’ve been killed by an ex, I’ve been raped, robbed, held hostage, abused beyond nightmares but the cruelty I’ve experienced from him bc of this disease is the coldest I’ve ever experienced. I’ve wanted to give up. Starving and in tears, desperate…I found a local food pantry in our small town so I reached out just saying I had Celiac and was on hard times. This woman is blessing me daily with prepared gluten free meals, donations, educational info, people who know this disease and how they manage life and the blessings just keep coming. But it’s overwhelming and I feel like I don’t deserve it at all. He just glared and I know he’s going to sabotage it somehow. I don’t even know what to do anymore. I’m so broken and just want peace and healing. 
    • cristiana
      Ibuprofen

      By cristiana · Posted

      @Colleen H   I am just curious,  when you were tested for coeliac disease, did the doctors find out if you had any deficiencies? Sometimes muscle pain can be caused by certain deficiencies, for example, magnesium, vitamin D, calcium, and potassium.   Might be worth looking into having some more tests.  Pins and needles can be neuropathy, again caused by deficiencies, such as iron and B12,  which can be reversed if these deficiencies are addressed. In the UK where I live we are usually only tested for iron, B12 and vitamin D deficiencies at diagnosis.   I was very iron anemic and supplementation made a big difference.  B12 was low normal, but in other countries the UK's low normal would be considered a deficiency.  My vitamin D was low normal, and I've been supplementing ever since (when I remember to take it!) My pins and needles definitely started to improve when my known deficiencies were addressed.  My nutritionist also gave me a broad spectrum supplement which really helped, because I suspect I wasn't just deficient in what I mention above but in many other vitamins and minerals.  But a word of warning, don't take iron unless blood tests reveal you actually need it, and if you are taking it your levels must be regularly monitored because too much can make you ill.  (And if you are currently taking iron, that might actually be making your stomach sore - it did mine, so my GP changed my iron supplementation to a gentler form, ferrous gluconate). Lastly, have you been trying to take anything to lessen the pain in your gut?  I get a sore stomach periodically, usually when I've had too much rich food, or when I have had to take an aspirin or certain antibiotics, or after glutening.  When this happens, I take for just a few days a small daily dose of OTC omeprazole.  I also follow a reflux or gastritis diet. There are lots online but the common denominators to these diets is you need to cut out caffeine, alcohol, rich, spicy, acidic food etc and eat small regularly spaced meals.   When I get a sore stomach, I also find it helpful to drink lots of water.  I also find hot water with a few slices of ginger very soothing to sip, or camomile tea.  A wedge pillow at night is good for reflux. Also,  best not to eat a meal 2-3 hours before going to bed. If the stomach pain is getting worse, though, it would be wise to see the doctor again. I hope some of this helps. Cristiana    
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

NOTICE: This site places This site places cookies on your device (Cookie settings). on your device. Continued use is acceptance of our Terms of Use, and Privacy Policy.