The Bro...

[NoGluGirl]

  JerryK said:

OK, I may be a bit slow on the uptake here, I just noticed this today. I'm laughing my butthole off.... Is that really a group's name?

Dear JerryK,

They certainly are a real band! You would never expect anyone to choose a name like that for their group, but they did! There are some crazy names for bands out there! I learned about them from Beavis and Butthead. As you know, I am so cultured and worldly! Some other funny band names include: Insane Clown Posse, Toad The Wet Sprocket, Better Than Ezra, Hootie and The Blowfish, Cinderella, Bad English, and Green Day. Interestingly, most of the bands with the wacky names are the best ones!

Meanwhile, your bro is giving us all pleasure in his suffering. Now, it may sound awful. However, my mother and brother go through the same thing. Then they go eat a pastry, and get sick. Enter Carlos Mencia's Dee Dee Dee! I am tired of explaining this to them. I am tired of them being inconsiderate of my condition.

When I ate gluten, my stomach was literally on fire. So was my butt! When I went to the bathroom, I could feel the acid coming out! I thought someone had stuck a fire cracker up there! My brother complains of the same thing, but won't even try the diet. You can try to help others, but if they will not accept it, what can you do?

Sincerely,

NoGluGirl

[Nancym]

  NoGluGirl said:

Yep. I was the one talking about how attractive men in aprons are. Emeril, Ming, Mario, they are all babes! A man that can feed you is a babe! There is nothing better than an adonis holding a spatula! Rocco DiSpirito, or my favorite Todd English, or how about Aaron Sanchez? There are many to choose from! So many flavors, so little time!

Sincerely,

NoGluGirl

MING! *pant* Lets not forget Alton Brown, he's such a studly, nerdy cooking guy!

I'm telling you, men who cook and/or clean....they light this girl's fire.

[JerryK]

  NoGluGirl said:

You can try to help others, but if they will not accept it, what can you do?

Yah, well I told my brother the ulcers around his behind might heal if he laid off

the wheat.

[JerryK]

OK, so TODAY he tells me that the RUNS ARE ALWAYS WORSE on Monday. I said what did you eat this weekend?...He says oh I was good!.. Yesterday I had eggs...sausage...hash browns...TOAST..

Do you eat TOAST during the weekdays? "Er No..." Well ya dumb $hit, I can tell you why you feel worse on Monday!.....

Then he says...."hey do you hurt every morning when you get up?" I said um..NO..I don't eat wheat...

Well what causes me to hurt? "Well perhaps it's because you are having an immune system reaction caused by the gluten you've been eating"....

The beat goes on....

[Jestgar]

:lol: :lol:

Well, maybe he's brain-fogged too and that's why he's having such a hard time getting it.

[JerryK]

  Jestgar said:

:lol: :lol:

Well, maybe he's brain-fogged too and that's why he's having such a hard time getting it.

He is swimming down the same river I was...de nile...

[Jestgar]

  JerryK said:

He is swimming down the same river I was...de nile...

Tell him to watch out for the pirhannas, I here they can bite you in the butt...

[sfm]

  JerryK said:

So my brother calls me this morning. (my identical twin, for those who don't know)

He says they ran out of bread at his house, and he'd been feeling pretty good. His wife went and bought a couple loaves and he said "I had three Chicken Sandwiches". He says "My butt is scorched".

I'm about rolling on the floor laughing, because of the way he's describing his symptoms....and I'm like DUDE isn't it about time you listened to me?? I've been telling him for months. He's followed along...seen my Enterolab test results...seen the results of my Gene Tests. KNOWS that I've determined I'm SERIOUSLY gluten intolerant, yet HE IS STILL EATING IT.

Even my mom, who at first accused me of Hypocondria now gets it. She taped a TV interview with the doc who wrote "Celiac Disease a Hidden Epidemic"(sorry can't think of his name) and tells me "I'm sure glad you don't have that gene...you don't have to worry." Well maybe not totally true, but at least she's now paying attention. At least she understand why I don't go rushing for the cookies anymore.

The bro however, continues to scorch his behind.....I guess I can look at it as a double blind study of what would happen to me if I continue to eat it....

I love this whole thread!! I'm also an identical twin. I tested with Enterolab for active gluten sensitivity, and double positive for one of the gluten intolerant genes.

Interestingly enough, my darling sister was diagnosed with IBS more than ten years ago, and rheumatoid arthritis two years ago. So I shared all of my interesting news with her, and she hems and haws and seems to find all kinds of reasons why she's not gluten intolerant. I even mentioned that there is a strong connection between rheumatoid arthritis and gluten intolerance.

I can't imagine why someone would not even try something that might help them. Not that it wasn't difficult to give up - but once I felt so much better, it seemed worth it.

I guess it all depends on how you look at it.

Sheryll

[NoGluGirl]

Dear NancyM,

Oh yeah! Ming, Alton, Todd, Mario, Emeril...the list goes on and on! Alton is extra hot because not only is he a great cook, but he could probably fix your computer too! That is my kind of man! Guys who do housework are just as good or better! Tony Danza on Who's The Boss anyone! There is just something about a man with a feather duster in his hand!

Dear JerryK,

ROFLMAO! Your brother! OMG that sounds like my bro! Gee, I wonder why I have fire shooting out of my butt? Can you figure that out? Dude, you are eating gluten! Maybe we should change the name of this thread to the retarded relatives thread?

Dear Sheryl,

This sounds like my mother, father, and brother. They make up anything they possibly can to keep eating pastries and other deadly crap. What can you do? I am tired of feeling sorry for them. They sure do not care about me. Not only do they treat me like a hypochondriac, but they have gluten crumbs everywhere. They do not care if my intestines are shredded. Despite being paranoid careful, my parents have managed to gluten me once a week lately.

Sincerely,

NoGluGirl

[JerryK]

  NoGluGirl said:

Dear JerryK,

ROFLMAO! Your brother! OMG that sounds like my bro! Gee, I wonder why I have fire shooting out of my butt? Can you figure that out? Dude, you are eating gluten! Maybe we should change the name of this thread to the retarded relatives thread?

NGG, I am really enjoying giving my brother a hard time over this one. He knows I'm right, but not admitting it

Sheryl, I'd love to compare notes with ye:)

[Nancym]

NoGluGirl, we gotta get pinups up these chefs!

[JerryK]

I'm reading on Yahoo today that Rare "Semi-Identical Twins" have been identified as another type of twin. This is a relief to me as I'm now sure my twin must be one of these as that would totally explain his odd behavior.

[NoGluGirl]

Dear JerryK,

Oh yeah, giving them a hard time makes everything so much more fun! They deserve it, too! Relatives think they can make up anything and it is fine. I am sitting there telling them "Don't whine when you get stomach cancer and diabetes, because I warned you!" No one listens. I think the Yahoo search would explain everything! The semi-identical twins make sense.

Dear NancyM,

Pin-ups would be nice! We'll have Ming with a caption of "Let me Wok your world!" Mario's can be "Real men make pasta!" Todd's will be "Is it me, or is it hot in here?" Emeril's is "If you think Cajun food is hot, check Emeril out!" Alton's can be "Nerds can cook. That is why we are taking over the world!" What do you think?

Sincerely,

NoGluGirl

[sfm]

  JerryK said:

I'm reading on Yahoo today that Rare "Semi-Identical Twins" have been identified as another type of twin. This is a relief to me as I'm now sure my twin must be one of these as that would totally explain his odd behavior.

SEMI - IDENTICAL??? And what would that mean, exactly? They do or don't come from the same egg?

[JerryK]

  sfm said:

SEMI - IDENTICAL??? And what would that mean, exactly? They do or don't come from the same egg?

According to the article...

Researchers discovered twins who are identical on their mom's side of the equation but share only half their genes from dad.

Here's how it happened: Two sperm cells fertilized one egg

[NoGluGirl]

  JerryK said:

According to the article...

Researchers discovered twins who are identical on their mom's side of the equation but share only half their genes from dad.

Here's how it happened: Two sperm cells fertilized one egg

[sfm]

  NoGluGirl said:

Dear JerryK,

Wow, that is interesting! I thought that was fraternal twins, though. Wait a second. Maybe fraternal twins are two separately fertilized eggs by the same sperm? Is that how that works? Since I am not a twin, I do not know as much about this stuff.

Sincerely,

NoGluGirl

Fraternal is two eggs, two sperm. That semi-identical thing is strange, I never knew that was even possible...

[JerryK]

Getting back to the whole brother thing...whether or not he is identical or semi-identical, I do not know

I've decided simply mocking him may be the best tactic, esp. when he calls and complains about having stomach issues.

I suppose I could also take pictures of my lovely stools and send them to him for comparison purposes.

(sorry)

He will continue to be in denial until he can't stand it anymore....

Also, I was under the impression that since I'm HLA DQ3,1, I couldn't possibly be Celiac. Some of the posts I've read the last few days lead me to believe that's not true. I've seen a 3,1 poster who's positive and someone with a normal blood panel with a positive biopsy. So it's back to I'm not sure if it's Celiac or Gluten Intolerance and never will be....without a biopsy.

I'm o.k. with that.

[CarlaB]

  JerryK said:

I'm reading on Yahoo today that Rare "Semi-Identical Twins" have been identified as another type of twin. This is a relief to me as I'm now sure my twin must be one of these as that would totally explain his odd behavior.

His odd behavior? Aren't you the one spitting out Girl Scout Cookies?

[confused]

  CarlaB said:

His odd behavior? Aren't you the one spitting out Girl Scout Cookies?

i was thinking the same thing. I think jerry is still swimming down the de-nial lol.

paula

the poster who is postive with the same genes as jerry lol

[Jestgar]

  JerryK said:

I've decided simply mocking him may be the best tactic,

:lol:

You must be part of my family!

[Fiddle-Faddle]

  JerryK said:

. So it's back to I'm not sure if it's Celiac or Gluten Intolerance and never will be....without a biopsy.

I still maintain that celiac is what happens when you are gluten intolerant and continue to ingest gluten--no matter what genes you have.

The genes just give you a predisposition towards something; that doesn't mean that you're not going to develop it without the genes. Not every woman with breast cancer is positive for BRCA1 or BRCA2.

So you could have a biopsy, be declared officially non-celiac, go back on gluten, or even stay mostly gluten-free but cheat every once in a while, and still have your villi wimp out on you and --voila! become celiac anyway. Or you could develop fibromyalgia, or arthritis, or lupus, or thyroid problems, or any number of other things that celiacs/gluten-intolerants seem to be more than typically prone to.

I'm not bothering with a biopsy or genetic testing, I'm just staying the heck away from gluten! And as soon as I figure out how to make gluten-free Pepperidge Farm Milano Cookies and Gluten-Free Malt-flavored Ovaltine, I will truthfully be able to say that there's not a thing I miss!

[NoGluGirl]

Dear sfm,

Thanks for the info! That is interesting. I was never clear on the exact definition of fraternal twins. All I knew was, they could be the same sex and did not usually look alike. That is neat!

Dear JerryK,

I think you should send your poo pics to your bro! That is so funny! My bro and mother are the same way. They are living in their own little world (but it's okay, they know them there!) La dee freakin' da! Maybe one day they will stop complaining about how sick they are and do something! I am at least trying! They just eat stuff that is deadly then cannot figure out why they are miserable.

Sincerely,

NoGluGirl

[JerryK]

  CarlaB said:

His odd behavior? Aren't you the one spitting out Girl Scout Cookies?

At least I spit out the cookies!! HE is the one eating THREE CHICKEN sandwiches and wondering why he's got the runs

He is the odd one, I'm the normal good looking one

[JerryK]

Today fruitcake brother is once again complaining of the big D! He says "I think it's cause of the stress and anxiety of going back to work on Monday".

I told him...did you ever think it could be the other way around? Did you ever stop to wonder if what you are eating is making you feel more stressed? Perhaps if you changed your diet and gave it a little time, you could actually feel better?

He knows I'm right....