Recovering Professionally?

[SillyBoo]

I would love to hear from others who have had career interruptions from Celiac.

My work suffered horribly for close to a year and a half before diagnosis. After establishing myself as a very valued professional, my performance started to slip, exacerbated by the "supervisor from hell" who was eager to discredit me anyway. Rather than trying to assist when I was obviously having difficulties, she made things much worse. Once I finally had to give up my denial, and admit that I was ill, I took nearly 3 months off (FMLA). AFter a few months back, it became clear that I couldn't stay there, so I left 6 months ago.

So now I am doing some contract work for my former employer (hired by the Executive Director, NOT my former supervisor), but I am so burnt out because of the way I was treated, and the intense stress of that situation for so long, that I am finding it extremely painful to do the work. I keep wanting to do ANYTHING but this work, or any other work in my field. I have a Master's degree, and am hesitant to give up the profession and pay, but I can't stand to do the work! My passion for the field has turned to disgust, and that's just not right.

Any suggestions on how to get through this? I can't afford counseling right now, since I have been mostly unemployed for the past 6 months. Should I just find work in another field (that would pay a lot less, since I have no qualifications for anything else)? Maybe a temporary job? Sell the house and take lots of time off? I have a husband and 2 teenage daughters, so my decisions affect more than just me. Anyone been in this sort of deep, dark hole and figured out how to crawl out??

I would deeply appreciate any suggestions. Thanks!

[Nancym]

I don't have an answer for you other than perhaps trying a different company, it can make all the difference in the world.

I am in a similar situation. After 20+ years in my field I'm just kind of burnt out and uninterested. I'd love to get back that motivational spark that used to drive me but it is gone.

[bakingbarb]

I don't know exactly what you are going through because I am not a professional in any field but I did work for 1 1/2 years at the same place going through similar treatment. Supervisor from hell, ya that would be me. It was so bad that when I quit I was awarded unemployment because of the mental anguish suffered at her hands. I was able to take the summer off and recover while looking for work. It didn't turn out that I got work, I had to go see my Dad in another state because he was very ill. When I go back from that trip I decided to go back to school to be able to be paid better finally. I was a stay at home Mom for my entire adult life so going back to work for minimal pay and bad bosses made me angry. I was also very depressed at this job, like I said it was for low pay and bad boss but as an adult that raised children and managed a household with no degree - well its an insult to work like that. I am intelligent enough to know better so I am going back to school. When I worked I ate a lot of sandwiches, breakfast sandwiches (fast food), cup o noodles, crackers, etc. I can see why my depression worsened!

I know you said you have to consider the money because of your family so a different career choice might not be the best thing. BUT you need to put your mental health and your spirit first. My walking out of that job was the best thing I ever did. Can you take a break from this type of work? Is there nothing similar? It sounds like the company you worked for wasn't so great and honestly that makes all the difference in the whole thing. I was really scared to even think about going back to work after my last job, I don't want to be treated that way ever again.

Could you talk to a career counselor? Maybe there is a career choice similar to what you know that won't take much more to learn. If you get a good career counselor it might help out a lot since they would know the market you are in along with everything involved. I don't think it would cost as much as going back to school either.

I hope things work out for you. Mostly though I hope you never run into a bad boss situation again.

[Jestgar]

I went through something similar and my solution was to run away. I did something completely different for much less money for a couple years and did some serious thinking about what I wanted from my life. I ended up coming back to my previous profession, but I now have absolutely no doubts that this is what I truly want. I also learned to live with a lot less money, which gave me some freedom to choose a job based on how I would like it, not on how well it would support my lifestyle.

[buffettbride]

I'm in Colorado, too. Just curious, what line of work are you in?

A Master's Degree is a great thing to have that should be able to open up doors in many industries, not just one, but I can see how the fog and depression about Celiac and feeling unwell can cause those feelings of helplessness.

I certainly think a new job or line of work would be in order.

If it helps any, I don't have Celiac but I totally feel the same way about my job. It's a nice job and all, I just don't want to do the work any more.

Take care!

[tarnalberry]

Depending on the field that you're in, and the company/organization you work for, I'd consider talking to your hiring manager - that executive director, or another person you work for that you trust that you have a rapore with.

I know it sounds daunting, and there's no guarantee it'll solve things instantly, but part of this is something you have to work through yourself, getting past your own block, and part of it may be getting help from those you're working with - and asking for help *is* a professional thing to do.

[rainabear]

I have an interesting take on this because I started gluten-free about a month into a sort of career change...and while celiac isn't the reason I changed, I think the timing was great. Before I was in a grad program in engineering and I'd been working for the same guy for 7 years and I felt bad about it because he was a great boss and I had been a good employee before I got sick, and I feel like I cheated him out of some good years. When I was sick, I was always late because it was hard to get out of bed and my mental facilities were definitely less, I know my work was less valuable during that time.

I decided to switch to a physics grad program for other reasons and the switch actually happened right before I started the diet. Even though I enjoy this program a lot more, I really do think that the fact that I was so sick during that time did sour the work I was doing at the time and that I wouldn't be quite so productive and enjoying myself if I had stayed, even if feeling better. It seems kind of silly maybe, but it's like suddenly being disgusted by popcorn because you ate it right before you got a horrid case of stomach flu...it might not be logical, but it makes it no less real. I hope your family is understanding.

Is there any sort of related work that you would still be somewhat qualified for, but interests you more?

Only you can balance your options and your family's needs and make a final decision about what to do...just wanted to let you know I understand.

[gfgypsyqueen]

I also lost my job after fighting through the celiacs diagnosis. I had a great boss, but my ability to perform my job suffered significantly. I found it very helpful to pursue hobbies that I "never have enough time for". My passion for my job was gone, but I was developing my passion about other topics. Eventually, my job became better and more interesting to me. I find it rewarding now, but I am also looking into some on-line classes to broaden my current job skills and to enhance my future employment options.

I also researched my alternative job choices. Now I have that back up information and I know what I need to do to change careers, if I need or want to find a new career.

Good Luck

[kbtoyssni]

I was in grad school for electrical engineering when I got sick. I ended up starting to hate it - I was way too sick to be effective which didn't work well at the top notch research institution I was at. I ended up dropping out and getting diagnosed a month later. I interviewed for a job in electrical engineering three months later and started working five months after that. In my time off, I coached high school gymnastics (I loved coaching little kids and I never would have had the opportunity to coach at a higher level without taking time off) and was an assistant girl scout leader (also something I wanted to be more involved in but hadn't gotten around to it).

Now I love my life. I'm still an electrical engineer, but in a completely different environment than before. I'm working on finishing my masters part-time at a different school (no way did I want to go back to my old school - too many bad memories). I'm also starting to judge high school gymnastics this year and want to get involved with girl scouts again next year when I'm done with my degree.

You've got to figure out what you need to get past the hurt of how you were treated. You might need a break from your current job and can spend the time doing things you really love and had never gotten around to. At that point you may be re-energized enough to go back to the same industry (but different company!) Or just getting a different job at a different style company (like a small company if you work at a large one now) might be enough. Good luck!

[SillyBoo]

Thanks so much to all of you for your stories, suggestions, and understanding! It all helps.

I actually work in Public Health, so it was a huge surprise that I got so little support during my illness. I like the popcorn and flu analogy - maybe that is responsible for at least some of my disgust. And, just like the chicken and rice I ate right as my severe morning sickness surfaced 16 years ago (which I swore I would never touch again!), I may get over that feeling of disgust in time.

I will give some of these suggestions a try.

[cyberprof]

Thanks so much to all of you for your stories, suggestions, and understanding! It all helps.

I actually work in Public Health, so it was a huge surprise that I got so little support during my illness. I like the popcorn and flu analogy - maybe that is responsible for at least some of my disgust. And, just like the chicken and rice I ate right as my severe morning sickness surfaced 16 years ago (which I swore I would never touch again!), I may get over that feeling of disgust in time.

I will give some of these suggestions a try.

I am posting late because I couldn't post at work (for obvious reasons).

I had a really bad time at my last job because of brain fog and depression. Was basically forced out in November '06 but was able to land on my feet due to friends and connections.

In addition to the other good ideas above, you might try 1) online teaching 2) consulting 3) writing 4) contract work.

I have a masters and industry experience. I teach online in my area of expertise (in addition to my day job). I know people who teach online for their only job. Depending on your experience and your field, you might get hired without any teaching experience. Consulting and writing and contract work are ways to arrange your own work envioronment, build your confidence and get rid of "demons" from the bad times. You could even combine 2 or more of the 3 ideas above. That is my "retirement" job goal!

Best of luck to you!

[SillyBoo]

What great suggestions! I would love to teach online - I will look into that. Any suggestions on where to start?

I am doing some contract work now, but struggle with it. I think the biggest issue for me is that 2 of my current projects are with my former employer, so I am staring my demons in the face on a regular basis. Hopefully, the daily confrontation (with my feelings, not the people) will help me work through it.

I would also love to write - maybe looking at Celiac from a Public Health perspective. Or something more personal. Not sure yet, but I'm open to suggestions!

Thanks!

[jenngolightly]

I took 9 months off - my boss and environment were terrible and I was really emotionally distressed. I thought I hated my profession, but after that much time off, I realized that I did like what I was trained for, but I didn't like the rut I had been in. I found a job that I was qualified for and took advantage of my skills, and I loved it. I was careful to test out the boss before I took it - asked around...

You can look for a teaching job by going to the college websites. If you are in the denver area, go to the community college websites like aurora, arapahoe, red rocks, front range, and denver. They all have employment sections that post teaching jobs. If you're qualified, you can look at local universities like DU, CU, and UCD, but they require PhD's for most positions.

I vote for taking time off.

[Centa]

In addition to what jenngolightly suggested, check out university websites for things like "continuing education", "professional development" or "distance education" as free-standing units in the university

Contact university departments in your subject area/s to see if they're doing "distance education" which is often the term used for online courses.

Good luck!

I've appreciated this thread so much. I'm another one who was blown out of the water for a long time as far as my work was concerned, until I found out that I was celiac. What agony a couple of years were. For awhile I thought I was going to have to go on permanent disability, which scared the living daylights out of me, because I need to work for awhile longer, since my financial future depends on my paycheck.

It's been 2 1/2 years since I quit eating gluten, and I'm just now getting out of the hole at work...the years that I would drag to work and then come home and go back to bed my performance was poor, by my lights, and like so many who have written here, it was so dispiriting. I hated my work; it was a nightmare of working all the time, because everything took longer to do because I was so fatigued all the time, and I hurt all the time.

Do you know what my symbol for those bad old days is? That I kept losing my keys. I work in a building that's not secure...we do have people coming through, and your desk drawers or purse is at risk, so everytime I'd leave my office, which is on a hall, I'd have to shut the door and take my keys.....and being in brain fog, and what wits I had were too focused on straining to get things done and that I hurt, I'd leave the bleeping keys everywhere: the ladies bathroom, tables, ledges...and not have a clue where they were.... the Lost Keys years.

Although my health pretty much has seemed to be back to what it would be at my age, now for awhile, it's taken me this long to recoup in mental attitude, get over the resistance to that work which had definitely lost its charm. Only now can I begin to think forward. I do like the posts in this thread that encourage to try things, not to just continue on in what for very good reasons became a grind.

Good luck to you all. It was startling to me how many people went through the same emotional duress at work. I was lucky not to have such an awful boss as some of you have had, but those years were bad.

Kind of makes you want to not eat wheat.

[loco-ladi]

well.... I have a boss from he** got a taste of him up close and personal just the other night, I however do have the option of staying with the same company I work for just going to a different segment any monday morning I want to get away from him......

notice I say "can" not "going to"......

he made 2 days of my work a living he**, now he has me mad, now I gonna make his next month a living he** and see how he likes it and when its all over.... THEN I will go to the "road" and get away from him, mwuhahahahahahahaha

I love unions you can get a bit even with idiot supervisors. But then again when they are idiots its easy to do as they did their own holes to climb out of!

anyone want me to get a good jab in for them even tho he isn't your boss just yell, lol

[cyberprof]

What great suggestions! I would love to teach online - I will look into that. Any suggestions on where to start?

I am doing some contract work now, but struggle with it. I think the biggest issue for me is that 2 of my current projects are with my former employer, so I am staring my demons in the face on a regular basis. Hopefully, the daily confrontation (with my feelings, not the people) will help me work through it.

I would also love to write - maybe looking at Celiac from a Public Health perspective. Or something more personal. Not sure yet, but I'm open to suggestions!

Thanks!

I have tons of suggestions for online teaching opportunities. I will PM you.

I hope you can face down your demons. I know exactly what you mean. You can do it!

[jmd3]

I would love to hear from others who have had career interruptions from Celiac.

Oh my heavens...I don't know where to begin.

For my profession I did in home parties for over 6+ years, In other words I worked for myself as a consultant of another company. My hubby would go to work, I would be home, he came home, I could go to work...and for about 4 hours I would be gone about 4-5 times a week.... great choice for me as I have been stay at home Mom for over 18 years. This got me out of the house for a bit to socialize, and work at the same time, a win-win situation. Anyway, I worked at my business for about 7 years, during that time I became a leader, went on 6 wonderful trips that I earned for free, and was selling over $60,000 in product a year. My present and future was fabulous with this company. I was usually in the top 100-200 of over 47,000 plus consultants. Some times I was in the top 10, and last August I was #2 in the US selling over 13,000+, just that month. I was good at my job! I was looking to be able to financially help my daughter in college, as most parents do.

I fell sick last Oct, there are no sick days with your own business. I lost my leadership, and my income....could not work, then hubby had to take a family leave to help to take care of me for about 4 months, more income loss. We have even had to cash in 401K, and unfortunately live on future income. It has been a major, major struggle for us. I feel like I let people down, couldn't fulfill my obligations, with business, household, as a mother and wife. I also had cancer, people can understand that....but they can't seem to grasp celiac disease, and all my new health issues with that. It seemed like I was making excuses all the time about not feeling well. I was so horribly ill, and I am still not back to fully recovered yet.

I miss my income, I miss the people I used to sell with, I miss the people that were my hosts, and hostess, I miss the guests at the parties.

I was a candlelady, and loved, loved, loved my work. I was my own boss, that made it so great!

On the bright side of things, I didn't get fired.

I am now starting back to do this about 3 times a month, it is not the same- and it is overwhelming, but it is good for me to be apart of the living again.

[helenabbadi]

Have you had time to recover from your illness completely? Maybe the new job isn't the problem, could it be trying to deal with the celiac disease? I haven't worked since feb, I had to quit my new job as a nurse because that is when I started to get too sick. I was sick the whole time I was in school and the short amount of time I worked. I hated school and the job, and I was starting to think I had made the wrong career choice ! Now I see the problem wasn't my career but my illnesses that were preventing me from enjoying my job! Iam still ill, but I'm sure that when I am fully recovered and go back to work, I will love my job! I Hope you get things worked out soon!

[taweavmo3]

I'm glad you posted this, I've been going through something similar. It's nice to see that others are going through the same thing. The past two years have been long and rocky for our family, first my little girl was dx'd.....we had two more babies, then we've been dealing with developmental delay and speech issues since then. All the while, trying to heal myself in the process. It's a bit overwhelming at times, and I am at the point where I am really struggling with my job.

I work in the healthcare field, and like others have mentioned, I have absolutely NO qualifications to do anything else! I feel like I could handle something low key, and less stressful.... the 12 hour shifts and stress have me completely burned out. I just can't handle what I could before, and it's really starting to show. Ugh, I even had a crying jag at work a couple of weeks ago, which I absolutely hate. I felt like such a girl, lol. I feel like I do need a change, but finding one is the hard part. With a family of 6 on the diet, I can't afford to not work.

Anyway, sorry to go off on my own tangent there! I wish I had more suggestions for you, but I do have some sympathy!