How Do You Explain It

[summerteeth]

I was diagnosed with celiac almost two years ago. I find that when I explain it to people, most of them at least understand it a little bit (as in, they understand I absolutely cannot eat gluten but maybe they don't understand why).

That being said, I have working in my current office for a little over a year (but I have worked at this company for almost three years. There are employees in and out of my office every day (I work for a trucking company) but there are three of us there: my boss (the president), an older lady who does secretarial work (but has been there for three decades) and myself (I am in IT).

Now this older lady, let's call her C, is a loud mouth character who is sometimes (begrudgingly) referred to as "an institution" (as in she has been there so long people request she pick up the phone and ramble off incoherent vulgarities). I have explained AD NAUSEUM my situation. I have brought in pamphlets on the disease. We get a lot of food from customers. Today, it was Pizza Hut pizza. With a piece, in hand, not two feet away from me, C TELLS ME I can have some because it is not made from whole wheat crust.

Okay, I am not trying to be oversensitive. And I could laugh it off it it only happened once in a while. But, like I said, it is almost daily. And, trust me, I have no desire to eat Pizza Hut. But my question is how do you explain celiac to people who just don't get it?

Sorry for the rant - I am just extremely frustrated with this...

[kareng]

What if you just laugh at her when she says something like that? "that's very funny! You can't fool me! I know white flour is made from wheat?". Or "Ha! ha! You don't really think white flour doesn't come from wheat?". Being a small office, you can't get too mean. I think you already realize she's mean and not the fastest truck in the lot!

[Jestgar]

..... and not the fastest truck in the lot!

This is what I thought, but I wouldn't have put it quite so nicely.

[summerteeth]

What if you just laugh at her when she says something like that? "that's very funny! You can't fool me! I know white flour is made from wheat?". Or "Ha! ha! You don't really think white flour doesn't come from wheat?". Being a small office, you can't get too mean. I think you already realize she's mean and not the fastest truck in the lot!

Haha that is a really good way to put it... she is kind of a, um... odd duck.

It just gets so grating, you know?

Thank you for the advice, though, I will try that next time she tries to pawn chocolate cake off on me.

[StacyA]

You gather up some serenity and accept that she is something you cannot change. You did have the courage to tackle the very difficult gluten-free diet, and you've educated others more than your energy required. Now you apply your wisdom to know the difference between what you can change and what you cannot - and you can't change her. Just smile and say - 'Oh, no, that has gluten, but thanks.'

It sounds cheesey, but maybe your only role can be planting the seed for her - and you already did it - job done. Maybe it'll have to take someone else in her life with celiac's or a food allergy to make her finally get it.

[Nor-TX]

I work in an elementary school and during staff meetings we basically all sit with the same groups. Staff meetings always have lots of food like cakes, cookies, little piggies in blankets, pita chips, brownies, crackers, dips....

Each and every time while I am eating my glutino pretzels and almond butter or jello the same insensitive b**** takes bites of brownies or pita dipped in spinach cheese dip and blows or exhales in my face and says, "Mmmmmmmmmmm doesn't that smell yummy. You know a little bit won't hurt you."

Well at first, when I was new to the diet I barely held back the tears, but now that I am feeling so much better I am stronger and just give her a smile and say, "oh wow, did you have garlic bread for lunch? or Wow did you have onion rings today?"

She still does it, but I am coping better. My DH is so supportive of my diet. We had company over for Memorial Day and he grilled me a portobello mushroom and I put it on some Katz gluten free Challah and it was delicious... didn't miss a burger at all. For dessert I made the Betty Crocker gluten free brownies and served them with regular ice cream for company and the So Delicous cookie dough icecream for me. No one made a big deal about anything because I didn't make a big deal of it either.

[kareng]

I work in an elementary school and during staff meetings we basically all sit with the same groups. Staff meetings always have lots of food like cakes, cookies, little piggies in blankets, pita chips, brownies, crackers, dips....

Each and every time while I am eating my glutino pretzels and almond butter or jello the same insensitive b**** takes bites of brownies or pita dipped in spinach cheese dip and blows or exhales in my face and says, "Mmmmmmmmmmm doesn't that smell yummy. You know a little bit won't hurt you."

I hope she isn't a teacher. If that's how she treats your food issues, is she teasing the kids in her class that can't have something? Bringing PB cookies for a kid with a peanut allergy. I think I would ask the teachers you want to sit with if they would move away from that person and why. Maybe if others tell her she is acting stupid she will stop.

[lynnelise]

Sometimes I somewhat inaccurately tell people I can't eat flour because I find that a shocking number of people don't think white flour is made from wheat!

[conniebky]

I hope she isn't a teacher. If that's how she treats your food issues, is she teasing the kids in her class that can't have something? Bringing PB cookies for a kid with a peanut allergy. I think I would ask the teachers you want to sit with if they would move away from that person and why. Maybe if others tell her she is acting stupid she will stop.

I'd have to get redneck in that situation and went and knocked that "lady" into next week. OMG! I cannot believe full grown adults act like this. Honestly, why in this world would a grown up act like that? I hope she's not a teacher too....what valuable thing could she possibly be teaching to children if she finds that kind of behavior appropriate on any level?

[Nor-TX]

I'd have to get redneck in that situation and went and knocked that "lady" into next week. OMG! I cannot believe full grown adults act like this. Honestly, why in this world would a grown up act like that? I hope she's not a teacher too....what valuable thing could she possibly be teaching to children if she finds that kind of behavior appropriate on any level?

Oh yes, she is also a teacher. Young, perky, always joking, everyone thinks she is quite a character.

[summerteeth]

Sometimes I somewhat inaccurately tell people I can't eat flour because I find that a shocking number of people don't think white flour is made from wheat!

Isn't it shocking how people don't know what is in their food?

And WOW -- that is a horrible attitude for a teacher to have! Food allergies and intolerance are serious problems. Definitely not something you can "just have a bite of".

[frieze]

Oh yes, she is also a teacher. Young, perky, always joking, everyone thinks she is quite a character.

actually, what she is doing is what is called "lateral violence" and she needs to be disciplined for it, she is opening herself and the school district to a lawsuit.

[lynnelise]

That teacher is a scary situation! I read a news article several years ago where a teacher gave a boy a cookie telling him it was okay after he told her he wasn't supposed to have it. He died as he was allegeric to peanuts. Luckily adults can ignore that kind of behavior but kids may honestly believe this teacher when she says a little bit won't hurt! They are authority figures to kids and kids trust them! Let's hope all her students are free of food allergies, which is unlikely in this day and age.

[Skylark]

These people don't WANT to get it. They don't care about celiac, and really they don't care about you. They care about appearing like the nice, sharing, generous person who makes sure you get a slice of pizza. The way to get around it is usually to make a big deal of the offer. "Thanks so much. You were so kind to think of me. No, I really can't eat that but you were so generous to offer to share." Yadda yadda... ad nauseum.

What that b*** of a teacher is doing is beyond normal. It's discriminatory and implies a desire to harm you. It's illegal to do that in a workplace and you don't have to put up with it. File a formal complaint with the HR department.

I've run across the white flour thing too. I had one waiter who was just hilarious. I was asking if they had a list of gluten-free food and he said all the breads had wheat but I eat the pasta. I asked what the pasta was made from and he said "flour". I asked him what the flour was made from and suddenly the light went on. Next, he looked at the menu and was suddenly sympathetic, asking me how I managed without flour.