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Just Want To Be Able To Eat Out Like A "normal" Person!

icelandgirl

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icelandgirl Proficient
icelandgirl
Posted

I'm so frustrated and just need to vent!  Sigh...sigh...

 

I just want to be a normal person again...be able to go out to eat without feeling scared or getting sick.  I've eaten out 3 times since my diagnosis.  The first time was Red Robin were I got glutened and I was sick for a week.  Ugh!  Then looked into restaurants that are good for celiacs and decided to try Chipotle.  It was great.  The person washed their hands, changed gloves and spoons and one person took my meal through the whole thing.  I went super simple.  Rice, beans, chicken and pico.  Didn't get sick...so happy.  I did worry the whole time...but it was all good.  Last night I decided to try Outback...also on the list of good restaurants.  They had a gluten free menu, the waiter was great, the chef's wife has celiac....should be good, right?  I went simple again.  I ordered a steak, grilled asparagus and a baked sweet potato.  Started feeling bad last night.  The first thing that happened is my rib pain on the left side came back, then nausea, GI issues, pain, fuzzy head, headache.  

 

I'm so frustrated and sad!  Sad because the meal wasn't great and was absolutely not worth being glutened for.  Frustrated because I want to be able to enjoy this kind of stuff in my life.  So now, I'm sitting here, not feeling good, sipping ginger tea and hoping I will be able to get through the day including my son's first soccer game of the season this evening.

 

Anyone else feel the same?  Thanks for letting me vent...

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GottaSki Mentor
GottaSki
Posted

Anyone else feel the same?  Thanks for letting me vent...

 

Not for a very long time, but sure I remember the early glutenings vividly from attempting to order safely and still getting hit.

 

If you are unsure of a restaurant, i strongly suggest bringing your own food and just ordering a nice cocktail or fancy coffee drink.

 

For me, I developed more intolerances and was unable to dine out safely anywhere so I started bringing my own and a funny thing happened -- I could go out with my friends or family and simply relax and have a nice conversation that didn't revolve around gluten or celiac. 

 

Hang in there -- it gets easier to eat out safely with time if gluten is the only thing you need to avoid completely.

 

For now, lots of water, maybe another few teas and rest!  I hope you'll be feeling better very soon :)

notme Experienced
notme
Posted

definitely makes you a better cook  :( 

 

my sister is the office manager of a (not a chain) restaurant and they are doing a gluten free menu.  sure, the ingredients are gluten free, but with shared prep areas and grill.  she threw a fit, for like, a year, until they cleaned up their act.  so, they finally went over everything and she told me it was safe for me to try next time I go to nj (and she's all proud of herself and stuff)  then she txt me and wants a good recipe for flatbread.  ummmm.....  oh, do they do their own baking in house?  where is that area?  smh!

 

(I don't eat out much)(but I am a great cook! ^_^ ) 

IrishHeart Veteran
IrishHeart
Posted

I have dined out successfully (and I've also been bitten on the ass a few times.) It happens 

 

Good experiences at PF Chang's, Bonefish Grill, Bistango in NYC, Naked Oyster in Hyannis Mass. etc.!

 

I go to places vetted by other celiacs on Find me Gluten Free.

 

I am normal...this is just the "new normal". You may have to get past thinking we are not normal people. :D

It is true: we can't be "spontaneous"--yes, that's for sure. 

 

Sorry you do not feel well, but know this: you can dine out and enjoy life once more. 

 

I choose carefully where I go, and I do prefer cooking at home because I am pretty good at it. (just ask the hubs and my fam and friends) lol

I have had friends cook for me too--they learned how to do it safely. When you feel better,I can tell you how.

 

Hang in there. 

CaliSparrow Collaborator
CaliSparrow
Posted

Yes! I was glutened a lot eating out and someone here said they didn't eat out at all year one. I wish I had known that earlier. It's the pits. My body also developed multiple intolerances and I stopped eating out except for one restaurant that has been very reliable (for special occasions) and I still feel better preparing my own food. I consider eating out a risk at this point.

Friday night, while on vacation, I did take a big risk and ate sashimi at a Japanese restaurant after speaking to the manager and sushi chef. The following night, friends and hubby encouraged me to take more risks but I felt lucky to have gotten away with the one so held my ground. It just felt so good to dine with friends and I had such a nice time that I didn't want to ruin it.

I have not developed the bravery yet to bring my food into a restaurant. Last year at a wedding, a gluten-free restaurant prepared my food that I then took to the wedding. It was awkward but once it was on the plate, I was home free. I feel less awkward as time moves on and Saturday night I enjoyed everyone's company with an empty placemat in front of me.

Because of Friday night's success story, I was tempted to try Red Robin yesterday but we didn't have time to stop. Now, after reading your post, I'm glad! I don't know what I was thinking. (Probably that I'm FREE!) It's difficult not to roll a successful evening into more daring feats of courage. I become emboldened and then *whack*! It hurts.

I hope you feel better soon. Try not to be hard on yourself. Easier said than done sometimes. Nurture, nurture.

icelandgirl Proficient
icelandgirl
Posted
  • Author

Thank you all so much for your nice responses and not calling me a whiner...I know I'm being whiny. I'm doing my best to take care of myself. Making some chicken soup for dinner.

CaliSparrow Collaborator
CaliSparrow
Posted

This is a safe place to whine. Whining here keeps me more civil in the public arena ;). Everyone should be so lucky, eh?

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nvsmom Community Regular
nvsmom
Posted

I haven't eaten out, for dinner, for almost 2 years... I feel your pain.  For me, it's partially because of my kids who are gluten-free. They are picky eaters and don't want fish, steak or salad for dinner. They want pizza, noodles, grilled cheese, muffins, cakes, or fries... that's not going to work in 99% of all restaurants, so we stay in.

 

But what I wouldn't give to order a pizza on nights when I feel lazy!  Sigh.

kareng Grand Master
kareng
Posted

I don't eat out like a "normal person" But I do eat out occasionally.  I go to places that I have found to be safe like - Bonefish, Outback, PF Changs, Pei Wei, MInsky's, California Pizza Kitchen, Beau Jo's, etc.  I have gone to a couple of higher priced restaurants and done well there, too.    I haven't tried Red Robin but they have good gluten-free practices.  I just don't go out for burgers when we make good ones at home.  Probably go there when out of town.

Sock Newbie
Sock
Posted

I haven't eaten out, for dinner, for almost 2 years... I feel your pain.  For me, it's partially because of my kids who are gluten-free. They are picky eaters and don't want fish, steak or salad for dinner. They want pizza, noodles, grilled cheese, muffins, cakes, or fries... that's not going to work in 99% of all restaurants, so we stay in.

 

But what I wouldn't give to order a pizza on nights when I feel lazy!  Sigh.

Pizza crusts freeze rather nicely! Whip up a bunch of gluten free crusts and toss 'em in the freezer...then make the kids sauce and top 'em.

 

Sure, you'll have a mess to clean up, but all you'll have to do for prep work is preheat the oven and fetch a crust out of the freezer.

GottaSki Mentor
GottaSki
Posted

I don't eat out like a "normal person" But I do eat out occasionally.  I go to places that I have found to be safe like - Bonefish, Outback, PF Changs, Pei Wei, MInsky's, California Pizza Kitchen, Beau Jo's, etc.  I have gone to a couple of higher priced restaurants and done well there, too.    I haven't tried Red Robin but they have good gluten-free practices.  I just don't go out for burgers when we make good ones at home.  Probably go there when out of town.

 

"Normal" is overrated.  My celiac kids eat out all the time...but it was a tough learning curve for them.  Teens don't like to stand out and males don't generally like to call attention to their physical limitations.  They figured out what they needed to be safe after several gluten hits.  Unfortunately, knowing how to select restaurants and talk to restaurant staff is not enough to prevent every accidental glutening, but you certainly can learn to better your odds and eat out safely.

kareng Grand Master
kareng
Posted

"Normal" is overrated.  

 

 

that is true!  Normals eat all kinds of sketchy things and then wonder why they don't feel so great later that afternoon!   :lol:

IrishHeart Veteran
IrishHeart
Posted

that is true!  Normals eat all kinds of sketchy things and then wonder why they don't feel so great later that afternoon!   :lol:

 

true dat :lol:  

CaliSparrow Collaborator
CaliSparrow
Posted

Normals eat all kinds of sketchy things and then wonder why they don't feel so great later that afternoon!   :lol:

My husband says that all the time and thanks me for "not being normal" because he feels so much better now! :)

The people I just spent time with were saying things like, "You're so lucky", "You are really doing it right", "I've given up gluten partially but am too lazy to go 100%" and I was asked for advice or was a sounding board for other's ills. I didn't get specific on personal details because it's not exactly dinner table conversation, but, there are a lot people out there who don't feel well and believe giving up gluten is the answer. One of the women had a doctor tell her to go Paleo. That kind of blew me away. At least in some circles, "normal" may be changing.

I didn't feel the need to differentiate the disease from the diet. They seemed to believe it was all on a spectrum and that the diet was to avoid illness. Who am I to argue? My idea of utopia is that everyone stops eating gluten and then we won't have to deal with the restaurant/social issues anymore!

IrishHeart Veteran
IrishHeart
Posted

I didn't feel the need to differentiate the disease from the diet. They seemed to believe it was all on a spectrum and that the diet was to avoid illness. Who am I to argue? My idea of utopia is that everyone stops eating gluten and then we won't have to deal with the restaurant/social issues anymore!

That's not likely to ever happen. (as wonderful as it would be for us). The vast majority of the world's population does not have a gluten issue (despite what the " experts" out there say on the internet). I once thought everyone did too, I even remember posting early in my time on here  saying" I bet we all have NCGS on some level"....but research and reality proves otherwise.

 

Looks like we're just very, very special.  :D

CaliSparrow Collaborator
CaliSparrow
Posted

That's not likely to ever happen. (as wonderful as it would be for us). The vast majority of the world's population does not have a gluten issue (despite what the " experts" out there say on the internet). I once thought everyone did too, I even remember posting early in my time on here  saying" I bet we all have NCGS on some level"....but research and reality proves otherwise.

 

Looks like we're just very, very special.  :D

Yeah, I know we're special (ha ha) & wouldn't wish this on anyone but I'm not going to argue someone out of going in the direction of my utopian dream! I'm still a romantic at heart (and horribly selfish) and will continue to click my ruby red slippers :D

IrishHeart Veteran
IrishHeart
Posted

Yeah, I know we're special (ha ha) & wouldn't wish this on anyone but I'm not going to argue someone out of going in the direction of my utopian dream! I'm still a romantic at heart (and horribly selfish) and will continue to click my ruby red slippers :D

 

 

lol  ok Dorothy, I hear ya......I share your dream of a gluten-free world ...but just recall...eventually she woke up and found herself right back in Kansas (no offense, Miz  K) 

IrishHeart Veteran
IrishHeart
Posted

and shoeless

nvsmom Community Regular
nvsmom
Posted

Pizza crusts freeze rather nicely! Whip up a bunch of gluten free crusts and toss 'em in the freezer...then make the kids sauce and top 'em.

 

Sure, you'll have a mess to clean up, but all you'll have to do for prep work is preheat the oven and fetch a crust out of the freezer.

Thanks. :). We make pizza airily regularly, it's just that "make" thing.... It would be a treat not to have to make the food. KWIM? Just open a box when I get home rather than having to use the oven.

CaliSparrow Collaborator
CaliSparrow
Posted

and shoeless

Huh huh huh - hang ten!

kareng Grand Master
kareng
Posted

lol  ok Dorothy, I hear ya......I share your dream of a gluten-free world ...but just recall...eventually she woke up and found herself right back in Kansas (no offense, Miz  K) 

 

 

in the middle of a wheat field!

icelandgirl Proficient
icelandgirl
Posted
  • Author

Not for a very long time, but sure I remember the early glutenings vividly from attempting to order safely and still getting hit.

 

If you are unsure of a restaurant, i strongly suggest bringing your own food and just ordering a nice cocktail or fancy coffee drink.

 

For me, I developed more intolerances and was unable to dine out safely anywhere so I started bringing my own and a funny thing happened -- I could go out with my friends or family and simply relax and have a nice conversation that didn't revolve around gluten or celiac. 

 

Hang in there -- it gets easier to eat out safely with time if gluten is the only thing you need to avoid completely.

 

For now, lots of water, maybe another few teas and rest!  I hope you'll be feeling better very soon :)

Thanks for your positive thoughts...today is definitely better than yesterday.

icelandgirl Proficient
icelandgirl
Posted
  • Author

definitely makes you a better cook  :(

 

my sister is the office manager of a (not a chain) restaurant and they are doing a gluten free menu.  sure, the ingredients are gluten free, but with shared prep areas and grill.  she threw a fit, for like, a year, until they cleaned up their act.  so, they finally went over everything and she told me it was safe for me to try next time I go to nj (and she's all proud of herself and stuff)  then she txt me and wants a good recipe for flatbread.  ummmm.....  oh, do they do their own baking in house?  where is that area?  smh!

 

(I don't eat out much)(but I am a great cook! ^_^ ) 

I'm so thankful that I already loved to cook!  That's really helpful.  I do miss the easy convenience of being able to grab something, especially on busy sports nights.

icelandgirl Proficient
icelandgirl
Posted
  • Author

Yes! I was glutened a lot eating out and someone here said they didn't eat out at all year one. I wish I had known that earlier. It's the pits. My body also developed multiple intolerances and I stopped eating out except for one restaurant that has been very reliable (for special occasions) and I still feel better preparing my own food. I consider eating out a risk at this point.

Friday night, while on vacation, I did take a big risk and ate sashimi at a Japanese restaurant after speaking to the manager and sushi chef. The following night, friends and hubby encouraged me to take more risks but I felt lucky to have gotten away with the one so held my ground. It just felt so good to dine with friends and I had such a nice time that I didn't want to ruin it.

I have not developed the bravery yet to bring my food into a restaurant. Last year at a wedding, a gluten-free restaurant prepared my food that I then took to the wedding. It was awkward but once it was on the plate, I was home free. I feel less awkward as time moves on and Saturday night I enjoyed everyone's company with an empty placemat in front of me.

Because of Friday night's success story, I was tempted to try Red Robin yesterday but we didn't have time to stop. Now, after reading your post, I'm glad! I don't know what I was thinking. (Probably that I'm FREE!) It's difficult not to roll a successful evening into more daring feats of courage. I become emboldened and then *whack*! It hurts.

I hope you feel better soon. Try not to be hard on yourself. Easier said than done sometimes. Nurture, nurture.

I also don't have the confidence to bring my food in with me...I'm sure that will come.  I normally carry a bag of almonds everywhere now. Good for you on vacation to take the chance and be able to enjoy it.  I'm so glad it worked for you!

icelandgirl Proficient
icelandgirl
Posted
  • Author

I haven't eaten out, for dinner, for almost 2 years... I feel your pain.  For me, it's partially because of my kids who are gluten-free. They are picky eaters and don't want fish, steak or salad for dinner. They want pizza, noodles, grilled cheese, muffins, cakes, or fries... that's not going to work in 99% of all restaurants, so we stay in.

 

But what I wouldn't give to order a pizza on nights when I feel lazy!  Sigh.

This I completely get.  We've been doing pizza/movie nights on Fridays forever.  We take turns picking the pizza and movie and all chill out.  I miss that.  It was nice to just order in and do nothing.  LOL!  I've made some pizzas at home now, but they aren't as good or as convenient.

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