Omg...i Might Be On To Something

[AndreaB]

Ok Rachel a new list.

Where are you Susan?

Rachelville Rich farmland by the ocean, with mountains at our back to provide fresh spring water.

Population (not sure haven't counted)

President: Rachel

Vice President: Patti

Governor: Julie

Lt. Governors: Miamia & Chelsea

Mayor: Andrea

Senator: Lisa

Secretary: Donna & Susan

Minister of Defense: Cissi in charge of auxigro detecting geese and dingo-ish dogs and Town Raconteur

Security: Donna

Village ambassador and queen: Julie

Newscaster: Celia

Decor and Design Committee: Patti -Decor Advisor, Susan - Garden Color Coordinator, Robbin - Assistant Decor Advisor, Rachel - Building and Landscape Advisor (this is going to be a very pretty place!)

Computer Tech: Vincent

Picard: Coach (for community sports) Oh and Diver for all our sea food..sorry you got 2 jobs

Christine: Nurse (you work in a hospital right?)

Cow and goat milkers: Evie and Armetta (I think she said she has milked before)

Music teacher: Alison

Chef 1: Miamia - Chef 2: Chelse - Chef 3: Rinne

Teachers: Andrea & Patti

Shopping consultant: Donna & Rachel

Community Events Coordinator: Rinne

Village adventurer/researcher: Meredith, who travels to distant lands to bring back news and information

Tony: captain for any water craft, so he can take Picard out for diving.

Mitch: truck driver, so he can haul whatever we need. Rachelville Paradise golf course driver. (also can be used by golfers when a driver is needed. Putt Putt.)

Andrea: Treasurer

Ryan: Handy-man, general fixer upper

Nikki: Cosmotologist, hair dresser

Physical Therapist: Lynne

Cissie: Literary reader around campfire or fireplace for the citizens of Rachelville

Vincent: Town hero and rule breaker

Jeny: Animal caretaker/veterinarian

Susan & Celia & Adam: Town comics

Cissie: Town matriarch

Cissie: History teacher Distinguished Chair of Celiac Literary and Historical Oddities dept.

Ryan: Language teacher

Tavi: Town bum, with the off time duty of raking leaves off paths in the fall

Karen: Counselor and Altoids Ambassador on Special Assignment

Donna: Pest patrol and dingo-dog flea controller (if needed)….it’s Rachelville after all.

Carla: Social Director

Robbin & Rinne: Book store attendants

Rachel: Ice cream maker

Rinne: Juice bar operator

Dave: Ship designer and defender of the downtrodden

Jim: Maker of boxes for precious collectibles.

Liz: PE Teacher

Karen,

You just need to infiltrate the altoids factory and learn how to make them.

Rachel,

I'm sure you will survive til tomorrow evening. You will, you will.

I know I can, I know I can, I know I can....survive until tomorrow night.

[DingoGirl]

Here is the application for PE teacher in R-ville.

Are you gluten free?

Do you promise to never infiltrate Rachelville with gluteney foods?

Do you promise to never bring gigantic Auxigro ridden produce into R-Ville?

OK...Thats about it.

If you answered yes to all of the above....the job is yours.

Oh...the purple glittery bats are our friends...so please do not hurt them.

OMG OMG OMG

THIS gave me the spinaching, gut-busting laugh of the day....just read these last few sentences to yourself, ESPECIALLY the choice one at the end about the glittery bats....and try to imagine a newcomer, stumbling into our fair cult, reading THIS...

BTW that is the job application for ANY prospective employee of R-ville, excellent Rachel...

and RACHEL....get a hold of yourself......you know they have meetings for people like you, who are lost in their addictions to a substance....oh......wait......I don't think they address the ice cream addiction specifically....

premature posting, will carry on reading now......

[Lisa]

ooooh Lynne's back on line. You guy's I had the best line and no feel back..... Jim??? 67. yeah? Bless his heart. I should not, but I did.

[DingoGirl]

R-Ville now has a PE teacher!!

Welcome to our paradise gluten free cult farm (PGFCF)....You can see Lisa for your official Rachelville T-Shirt.

Yay, a PE teacher!!

Rachel - correction - it's Lynne who has the T-shirts and the gay husband.....

[Canadian Karen]

Insert Mission Impossible theme here and listen:

Open Original Shared Link

[DingoGirl]

ooooh Lynne's back on line. You guy's I had the best line and no feel back..... Jim??? 67. yeah? Bless his heart. I should not, but I did.

what? confused....clue us in LIsa or did I miss something....and BTW is yours the husbnad who's "not as straight as he used to be" ??? I dunno what to say either..... But we'll get him STRAIGHTENED OUT in R-ville - - -

oh no, there cannot be a dearth of Altoids in R-ville - - must try and keep our cult a secret, our farm will be a GIGANTIC walled city/fortress, impossible to penetrate.......

my our list is growing ever so long, Andrea.....

[tiredofdoctors]

Madame President: I feel the need to clarify a few items.

1) I make ONE MISTAKE, and all He** breaks out . . . granted it was a HUGE mistake -- that will teach me not to stroll through Rachelville BEFORE I've taken my concerta. Obviously, I need to concentrate and read, not SCAN . . . . and will NOT make that mistake again. My poor, dear, wrongly accused of being gay husband. . . . Do you know how many Altoids nights I'm gonna have to go through to repay him for that????? May as well nickname me "hummingbird"

2) I was not the first one to introduce the T-shirt idea . . . . if you scroll back, oh, say, 50 posts(maybe more), you will find that SOMEONE said that we could have T-shirts that said something to the effect of Someone . . . . . and all I got was this t-shirt. THAT ALONE would constitute ADVERTISING for Rachelville . . . and would get CNN interested. MY shirt simply stated that I did not want anyone who wasn't a resident to bother me. I'm saving my altoids for the Rachelville MEN. Did we all hear that . . . Hunky, Burly MEN -- Not women -- although my husband may have a little difficulty with me "spreading the love", so to speak.

3) Tic-Tacs will NEVER do . . . although their previous jingle was "Put a Tic-Tac in your mouth and get a BANG out of life" . . . . enough said

I think I am finished; however, should I find any additional discrepancies, I will contact you immediately. Thank you for your time and consideration . . . . I remain, Sincerely, Town Physical Therapist and resident expert in Foot in Mouth disease

[DingoGirl]

lunatics, all of you.....er, me too, I guess........

OMG OMG OMG

Karen I LOVE the Monk-e-mail and send them to all my friends....

GAWWWD Help me am dying laughing..................

[AndreaB]

3) Tic-Tacs will NEVER do . . . although their previous jingle was "Put a Tic-Tac in your mouth and get a BANG out of life" . . . . enough said

Oh, what have I done? Next time I'll know better than to open my big mouth about something so simple as a breath freshener.

[miamia]

Insert Mission Impossible theme here and listen:

Open Original Shared Link

Karen -

this is the funniest thing I have ever seen- you should totally get the award this month!!!

Miamia

[DingoGirl]

Oh, what have I done? Next time I'll know better than to open my big mouth about something so simple as a breath freshener.

Do not fear, gentle citizens of R-ville! We shall simply never, EVER run short of Altoids, ice cream, inordinately large and impossibly sweet mangos grown without Auxigro, Hershey's Nuggets with Almonds (in fact I am goign to the store just now in my pajamas to get some)....what else? all the histamine-free produce and spinach you can eat, you name it!! None of it will ever, ever run out.

[Guest Robbin]

Wow, Andrea, you are a great record-keeper!

Miamia, I use Ener-G sweet rice flour or tapioca flour and mix it with potato starch for most of the recipes I make. Seems to work really well for breading fried food, baking, etc.

Have a wonderful Sunday everyone!!

EDITED FOR TOPIC

[Canadian Karen]

Do you know how many Altoids nights I'm gonna have to go through to repay him for that????? May as well nickname me "hummingbird"

I was picturing more along the lines of a piston on wheels......

[DingoGirl]

ROBBIN! Yay, sounds like you had a good day! so glad you got to get out in the dirt AND take your wonderful dog to the park....all the dogs/dingos/geese are going to do just fine! Yes, we were together in spirit today, as I was at the park too, and just smiled to myself as I saw huge gaggles of geese.....would love to take a photo of my girls with the geese but, don't think that would work and oh, it is against the law.....

Glad you're feeling better and good to hear from you!

[mouse]

Karen, I love your Monkee cards as they are the absolute best and the funniest. The one you sent me when I was sick, I think I read daily every day for weeks. Laughter is so good for the soul. Thanks for being you.

[Lisa]

Too tired to go back to the geese thread, and don't know.......

We used to live on a lake and every day about 500 geese would come to rest. EVERYWHERE. When the girls were small the would ride their bikes and someone would be behind in the wagon that the bike would pull.

There was so much goose crap all over the road, that as the bike traveled down the road, it would kick up all the goose crap into the wagon and the girls would come in splattered with goose crap all over their faces and clothes. The bike wheels would kick it up into their faces.

You can really slip on goose crap too and really hurt your self. They CRA- everywhere.

They ARE CANADIAN, CAN WE SEND THEM BACK.

All they do here is eat and do-do.

L

[tiredofdoctors]

Karen -- I am laughing so hard I can't BREATHE!!! Dave is simply shaking his head . . . .

In case y'all don't know . . . I'm in a wheelchair . . . hence, "piston on wheels". Good thing I ordered new batteries for the wheels two weeks ago!!!!!!! May have to order new brakes, too!!!!!

Karen, you are the BEST

[tiredofdoctors]

Oh, what have I done? Next time I'll know better than to open my big mouth about something so simple as a breath freshener.

You said it, NOT me . . . I simply CAPITALIZED on it!!!!!!!

Hugs to you, Andrea,

Lynne

[DingoGirl]

That's right, Lisa, I echo what Cecile said....our geese in r-ville DO NOT poop, they are magical, so do not worry...

am...trying....to.....resist.....going .......to store.... to get .....the NUGGETS.......help me........

[Rachel--24]

Yay, a PE teacher!!

Rachel - correction - it's Lynne who has the T-shirts and the gay husband.....

ROFLMAO!!!

ahhhhh....Sorry to Lisa (and her straight hubby).

<smacking myself on the forehead> ....seeeeee this is why I *need* my ice cream!!!

I'm halucinating and delirious with laughter. Mixing up everything here in R-Ville....getting the T-shirts and gay husbands all confused.

I have a solution. Frozen apple juice and pear juice pops....this might do the trick. No added sugar, No added Auxigro....goooood stuff.

[tiredofdoctors]

Yeah, but once the word gets out how talented us Rachelvillettes are with our Altoids, pretty soon there will be population explosion and for every one woman, there will be 20 men......

Does that mean I will have to give a step by step demonstration on the proper technique?

Granted, we Rachelvillettes are TALENTED . . . but step-by-step demonstration on the proper technique got us in to WAY too much trouble a few months ago . . . . .

And I have the STRAIGHT husband . . . . it's LISA'S husband who isn't as straight as he used to be . . . .

[AndreaB]

am...trying....to.....resist.....going .......to store.... to get .....the NUGGETS.......help me........

I know I can, I know I can, I know I can.....resist my Nuggets.

[Rachel--24]

what? confused....clue us in LIsa or did I miss

Yeah...I dont get it either??

I wasnt going to ask since I seem to be just generally confused today anyways...thought maybe it was just me.

EDIT: I'm prematurely posting so maybe this has been answered already. I'm learning bad habits from Susan...so I apologize in advance.

BTW is yours the husbnad who's "not as straight as he used to be" ??? I dunno what to say either..... But we'll get him STRAIGHTENED OUT in R-ville - - -

[Lisa]

How wonderful to laugh! How great you all are. And how bright and quick so many of you are. Susan, if we get you "hooked-up" we will loose you to love. Got someone for you here, but your are GU (geographically, undesireable). Come east, and I can hook you up. Former Mayor, Huh..

L

[tiredofdoctors]

Now that you have a potential man for her, you may be reinstated!!!!!