Jump to content
  • Welcome to Celiac.com!

    You have found your celiac tribe! Join us and ask questions in our forum, share your story, and connect with others.


  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A1):
    Celiac.com Sponsor (A1-M):
  • Get Celiac.com Updates:
    Support Our Content
    eNewsletter
    Donate

The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original


TriticusToxicum

Recommended Posts

Darn210 Enthusiast
It is a very old thread, now in its fourth year and on its fourth life.

So if it was a cat, I would say it's got five more lives to go . . . but it's chocolate. What's the life expectancy of chocolate? I know that once it gets into my house, it's got about 24 hours max, but what if it's just hangin' out there on a thread?


Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):



Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):



  • Replies 51k
  • Created
  • Last Reply
blueeyedmanda Community Regular

Sillies I almost forgot to tell you....yesterday I was laying on the couch and my cat came up and laid between me and the back of the couch, he was on top of my back and I was on my stomach surfing the net. Well, he was purring like a motor and it was the strangest feeling....it was going right through me! Anyone ever have a cat so strange?

nikki-uk Enthusiast
OMG--I'm sure of that! What a hilarious story :lol:

"ya left yer head 'a cabbage here" :lol::lol: Cracks me up, and I wasn't even there :P

Me too!!!! :lol::lol::lol:

OMG!! How fantastic

None of my family quite share my sense of humoUr (dunno why <_< )...I was always the black sheep.................but how I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE to laugh like that....shoulders shaking, chest bursting, eyes streaming :lol: FAB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tel has come round to my curious humoUr (it's taken 20 yrs but I've worn him down)...almost suprising himself by also dissolving into the shudders without ever really knowing WHY?? :blink:

Can WE have Janie....PLEEEEEZE!!!!!!!! :D

....the ribbon dangling....the specs escaped.... :lol:

Mother & Daughter ARE veritable NUTS!!! :lol::lol:

tom Contributor
[.......just a ribbon leading to nothing hangs off my desk until I find them again. :ph34r: ]

This sounds like it should be a metaphor for something . .. .

. . . .. .

But.......before I even said hello I heard the Mad Lady just cackling away.........it KILLS me, every time.......and there is a certain laugh we do that we ONLY do with each other.........

.. .. .

mad dingo-brained woman cackling maniacally in the produce section, others quietly navigating AROUND this crazy lady..........

:lol: :lol: :lol:

tom Contributor
Sillies I almost forgot to tell you....yesterday I was laying on the couch and my cat came up and laid between me and the back of the couch, he was on top of my back and I was on my stomach surfing the net. Well, he was purring like a motor and it was the strangest feeling....it was going right through me! Anyone ever have a cat so strange?

Sounds kinda fun but all I can think of is how I have NO idea how many years it's been since I could comfortably lie on my stomach. -_-

jerseyangel Proficient

Sometimes the only way I'm comfortable is laying on my stomach. Weird :huh:

Darn210 Enthusiast

A couple of one-liners from my kids whilst we work on homework . . .

From my son: Bees make the best honey in the whole world!!

From my daughter: Did the pioneers hitchhike?


Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):



Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):



elye Community Regular
- whatever - but today it was a CABBAGE. :lol: (please note: it's GROEEN, BTW)

AAhh! Green again!! ...a head of cabbage...

Did you weigh it? The rule is: if it weighs more than your own head, it is fully ripe and ready for consumption. :lol::lol:

you guys would LOVE me mum!

Yep. Already do...she is SO in for the Laurentians!

So if it was a cat, I would say it's got five more lives to go . . . but it's chocolate. What's the life expectancy of chocolate? I know that once it gets into my house, it's got about 24 hours max, but what if it's just hangin' out there on a thread?

Well...doesn't it exist into perpetuity on one's hips? <_<:rolleyes:

Sounds kinda fun but all I can think of is how I have NO idea how many years it's been since I could comfortably lie on my stomach. -_-

Oh!! Only way I can sleep well.....flat out on stomach, arms and legs thrown out kamikaze-style...talk about the need for a big bed!.........

DingoGirl Enthusiast
OMG!! How fantastic

None of my family quite share my sense of humoUr (dunno why <_< )...I was always the black sheep.................but how I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE to laugh like that....shoulders shaking, chest bursting, eyes streaming :lol: FAB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Can WE have Janie....PLEEEEEZE!!!!!!!! :D

.

:lol: Yes, we can ALL have Mad Janie......crazy cackler that she is....Nicola, I'll axe her to adopt you, she wants more chillen's and wants grandchildren that actually pay attnetion to her, so make yer boys hop to it...... (my bro is not her biological son, though she has raised him such - but his five girls are not her biological grandchildren - oh and their gluten-brained mother NEVER EVER EVER has taught them to pay any attention to anyone outside of their immediate family :angry: )

Janie will adopt all who need a goofy mother figure. :) She has a VERY un-goofy husband - - hardly a shred of silliness in this man - hence she DEMANDS I hang out wif her at least once or twice a week.

Sounds kinda fun but all I can think of is how I have NO idea how many years it's been since I could comfortably lie on my stomach. -_-

:blink:

mygawd.....that used to be my FAVORITE position to sleep in.....er, I mean, in which to sleep....and it's been at least 6 or 7 years - back problems..... harrrumph!!!!!!!! never again....hurts so much I can't breathe properly........

AAhh! Green again!! ...a head of cabbage...

Did you weigh it? The rule is: if it weighs more than your own head, it is fully ripe and ready for consumption.

:lol: really? must weigh own head and then weigh the wee cabbage.

in other news.......

OMG sillies. Young Jenn is/ was being set up on a blind date w/ this young doctor. Looked cute when we googled him, we were slightly pleased. Well, they've had a couple less-than-stellar phone conversations.......it's not been going well. :huh:

So....Jenn is to get together w/ Kissey and a few of us this evening, but this dr. called yesterday and wondered if she could get together this evening after she gets off work. Well, tonight she's off at 6 instead of 8, adn told him she might be able to get together for a quick coffee before meeting friends out.....

There was a pause...... "Six o'clock?" he said, haltingly....... "well...............maybe we can get together for a..... light salad."

:blink:

what in hell? we find this very odd and we've been pondering it......

does light salad mean........she can't eat anything BUT that? she can ONLY have a salad? can it have......say........chicken on it, or is that not a LIGHT SALAD any longer? What if she wants a chicken caesar, is that okay? what if she wants soup with her salad?

What ARE the rules here??????????????????????

:lol: :lol: :lol:

we are bad people. :ph34r: Anywho Jenn's cancelling and just meeting us tonight.....no LIGHT SALAD.

jerseyangel Proficient

Is a light salad anything like a big salad? Can she crumble crackers in it? :P

Patti is perplexed....nothing new there, though :huh::lol:

elye Community Regular
mygawd.....that used to be my FAVORITE position to sleep in.....er, I mean, in which to sleep....and it's been at least 6 or 7 years - back problems..... harrrumph!!!!!!!! never again....hurts so much I can't breathe properly........

Luuuuurrrrve sleeping on stomach..... :wub: Arms akimbo....Gus's massive head on my back....one cat perched on me arse....DH on other side of king-size bed, snoring. :lol:

There was a pause...... "Six o'clock?" he said, haltingly....... "well...............maybe we can get together for a..... light salad."

This is indeed perplexing. Almost a little.....creepy. What full-blooded doctor-man suggests an outing and a light salad?....I'm getting a bit of that eeeeeewwwwwww feeling..... :huh:

:lol:

Darn210 Enthusiast
Is a light salad anything like a big salad? Can she crumble crackers in it? :P

I think a light salad means it has to weigh less than your head.

Darn210 Enthusiast
This is indeed perplexing. Almost a little.....creepy. What full-blooded doctor-man suggests an outing and a light salad?....I'm getting a bit of that eeeeeewwwwwww feeling..... :huh:

:lol:

Yes . . . run away . . . run away . . .(hard to tell, but that's a line from Monty Python . . . "with great big pointy teeth")

Mtndog Collaborator

Happy St Patrick's day All! I am 1/2 Irish. Me biological mum was straight off the boat! Actually- this is weird- my biological mum was irish and my bio dad was French-Canadian and my parents who adopted me were the same in reverse- me dad is a red-headed Irish man and me mum was the French Canadian one!

Siouxie- I want your mad mommy to adopt me too!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There was a football (soccer) club we called Personchester United. My job title was personager. The books we gave customers to help them use our products were personuals. Well, you get the drift. We even had a staff member we called Mr. Federperson. Oh, person! It was phunny at the time. Maybe it was just huperson nature. :lol:

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Sometimes I laugh so hard here my persondible hurts.

:lol: :lol:

Tom, what are those beers that you've got in your av?

Did you get mo' beer from Bev them from the BevMo?

I'm tired- everyone always wants MoBev Mo :P

Em - it's the Hershey's thread.

Why, oh why, did this make me think of the diarrhea song? :ph34r:

From my daughter: Did the pioneers hitchhike?

We can CLEARLY see who your kids take after! :lol:

jerseyangel Proficient
Arms akimbo....

Emily said "akimbo" :lol:

I think a light salad means it has to weigh less than your head.

Or your cabbage :P Would it then be cole slaw? :huh:

Siouxie- I want your mad mommy to adopt me too!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Me too! :D

Mango04 Enthusiast

Mind if I pop in for a sec?

I just have to share....

This is too strange.....:huh:

It was found in a restroom in a restaurant....in a very strange city.

the toilet that is painted like cheese

:huh: :huh: :huh:

:lol:

I thought I was seeing things, as it is quite cold where I am, and I believe hypothermia involves hallucinations (?)....but no, it really is a cheese toilet

:mellow:

:huh:

:lol:

:unsure:

Darn210 Enthusiast
Mind if I pop in for a sec?

I just have to share....

This is too strange.....:huh:

It was found in a restroom in a restaurant....in a very strange city.

the toilet that is painted like cheese

:huh: :huh: :huh:

:lol:

I thought I was seeing things, as it is quite cold where I am, and I believe hypothermia involves hallucinations (?)....but no, it really is a cheese toilet

:mellow:

:huh:

:lol:

:unsure:

So, Mango, you have something strange to share and you immediately think of . . . us????!!!!??? You don't think your make-up cult would appreciate a cheese toilet the way we would??? . . . Yeah, probably right on that one ;)

:lol::lol:

Anybody else notice that a hoverer failed to clean up after themselves??

jerseyangel Proficient
I thought I was seeing things, as it is quite cold where I am, and I believe hypothermia involves hallucinations (?)....but no, it really is a cheese toilet

Can you imagine facing that when you're nauseous :o:lol:

Anybody else notice that a hoverer failed to clean up after themselves??

I looked again and (green guy) saw it :o:o

Gawd!

E-w-w-w

You'd think they'd a cleaned it before taking a picture <_<

Jestgar Rising Star
Anybody else notice that a hoverer failed to clean up after themselves??

:snortingthroughnosewithhandovermouthface:

elye Community Regular
I think a light salad means it has to weigh less than your head.

Just about anything on a plate weighs less than DH's head....honestly. A Herculean Head, 'e's got..... :rolleyes::lol:

OMG.... :lol::lol:

Actually, this has gotten me thinking......

Do you think there is a market for painted toilets? I mean, fascinating trompe l'oieul effects....mouths that open, manhole covers into sewers, compact disc players that open, etc. This may be a whole new area for me to explore. As soon as I saw the cheese toilet, my immediate reaction was, "Well.....they could've made it look a lot more like cheese..." It should've been painted as a Philly creme cheese container that you open or sumfin. Hmmmmmm, a ponderable......

Anybody else notice that a hoverer failed to clean up after themselves??

Gross me out the door.....

Does no one else know the effective hovering technique?! :lol::lol:

Ridgewalker Contributor
There was a pause...... "Six o'clock?" he said, haltingly....... "well...............maybe we can get together for a..... light salad."

:huh: What a dweeb.

Didn't you say he was a doctor? Is he at least cute, do you know?

I cannot even tell you guys how much I lust after TV doctors. Patrick Dempsey... Hugh Laurie... :swoon: Lord, save me.

Speaking of which... tomorrow is a minor milestone for me. I'm going to my old college to fill out financial aid paperwork. I was an English major before, so I need to get a couple Bio classes in next fall before I apply to nursing school. Keep your fingers crossed that my car makes it, because it's not been doing well lately. :unsure:

BTW... My luurve for TV doctors has NOTHING to do with my decision to go to nursing school. Promise.

~alex~ Explorer

Happy St. Patrick's Day everyone! 3/4 Irish for me. I temporarily lost my mind and went out to the bar with some friends. The fact that I'm home by 10 is a clue to my level of enjoyment of the outing <_<. Not really my scene anymore; not sure it ever really was. I almost got vomited on by a very drunk 19 year old (well I'm assuming it was her first legal St. Patty's dad anyway ;) ). I'm so glad that I was never that girl who got so schnockered that I vomited on strangers. Very unattractive :lol:!

I've been thinking about your dad, Emily. I hope he was able to get his test done and that everything looks good. I hope the hospital takes better care of him -- makes me sad to think of him in the hall for hours :(.

Darn210 Enthusiast
BTW... My luurve for TV doctors has NOTHING to do with my decision to go to nursing school. Promise.

My Dad's favoUrite saying . . . Everybody who believes that go stand on your head!!

tom Contributor

No idea wth went on w/ me today. Started fine enough then spiraled down into pensive & disconsolate. And I'm reaaaaaaaaaally gettin' tired of it.

Just cracked the Green's Discovery Amber and . .. .it . .. is deeeeeeeeeee-lectable!!!!!

First sip brought glee - haven't had a beer like this in maybe 10 yrs. T H I C K & utterly pub-worthy. Yum. :)

(And grrrrrrr .. . .$5.50/500ml)

From my son: Bees make the best honey in the whole world!!

From my daughter: Did the pioneers hitchhike?

Heehee :lol:

Keep 'em comin'!!

mygawd.....that used to be my FAVORITE position to sleep in.....er, I mean, in which to sleep....and it's been at least 6 or 7 years - back problems..... harrrumph!!!!!!!! never again....hurts so much I can't breathe properly........

Yup .. . ..that's the deal.

Can't say stomach sleeping was the favoUrite here, but it was in the lineup.

what if she wants soup with her salad?

Consomme or bisque ONLY?

I think a light salad means it has to weigh less than your head.

GAH!!!!! Yer killin' me!! :lol: :lol:

Actually- this is weird- my biological mum was irish and my bio dad was French-Canadian and my parents who adopted me were the same in reverse- me dad is a red-headed Irish man and me mum was the French Canadian one!

And your given name was Ylreveb? :huh:

I'm tired- everyone always wants MoBev Mo :P

:lol:

Anybody else notice that a hoverer failed to clean up after themselves??

Ewwwwww

Didn't notice and am in NO way tempted to go look. :P :ewwwface:

Just about anything on a plate weighs less than DH's head....honestly. A Herculean Head, 'e's got..... :rolleyes::lol:

<snicker snicker>

OMG.... :lol::lol:

Actually, this has gotten me thinking......

Do you think there is a market for painted toilets? I mean, fascinating trompe l'oieul effects....mouths that open, .. . ..

Shark? Alligator? Hippo?

Maybe a baby bird!! <must crap down a baby bird's waiting throat!!> EWWWWWWW!!!!!

Oh oh oh this beer is sooooooooo good.

(And would be a $33 sixpack!! :ph34r: 16oz bottles)

Mango04 Enthusiast

I didn't take the picture of the toilet, just for the record (but someone I know did :ph34r: ) :lol:

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Get Celiac.com Updates:
    Support Celiac.com:
    Join eNewsletter
    Donate

  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A17):
    Celiac.com Sponsor (A17):





    Celiac.com Sponsors (A17-M):




  • Recent Activity

    1. - knitty kitty replied to catnapt's topic in Celiac Disease Pre-Diagnosis, Testing & Symptoms
      3

      results from 13 day gluten challenge - does this mean I can't have celiac?

    2. - knitty kitty replied to Scott Adams's topic in Post Diagnosis, Recovery & Treatment of Celiac Disease
      49

      Supplements for those Diagnosed with Celiac Disease

    3. - Florence Lillian replied to Jane02's topic in Gluten-Free Foods, Products, Shopping & Medications
      11

      Desperately need a vitamin D supplement. I've reacted to most brands I've tried.

    4. - catnapt replied to catnapt's topic in Celiac Disease Pre-Diagnosis, Testing & Symptoms
      3

      results from 13 day gluten challenge - does this mean I can't have celiac?

    5. - cristiana replied to hjayne19's topic in Post Diagnosis, Recovery & Treatment of Celiac Disease
      21

      Insomnia help

  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A19):
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      133,354
    • Most Online (within 30 mins)
      7,748

    Gracieruizzz
    Newest Member
    Gracieruizzz
    Joined
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A20):
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A22):
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      121.6k
    • Total Posts
      1m
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A21):
  • Upcoming Events

  • Posts

    • knitty kitty
      @catnapt, Wheat germ has very little gluten in it.  Gluten is  the carbohydrate storage protein, what the flour is made from, the fluffy part.  Just like with beans, there's the baby plant that will germinate  ("germ"-inate) if sprouted, and the bean part is the carbohydrate storage protein.   Wheat germ is the baby plant inside a kernel of wheat, and bran is the protective covering of the kernel.   Little to no gluten there.   Large amounts of lectins are in wheat germ and can cause digestive upsets, but not enough Gluten to provoke antibody production in the small intestines. Luckily you still have time to do a proper gluten challenge (10 grams of gluten per day for a minimum of two weeks) before your next appointment when you can be retested.  
    • knitty kitty
      Hello, @asaT, I'm curious to know whether you are taking other B vitamins like Thiamine B1 and Niacin B3.  Malabsorption in Celiac disease affects all the water soluble B vitamins and Vitamin C.  Thiamine and Niacin are required to produce energy for all the homocysteine lowering reactions provided by Folate, Cobalamine and Pyridoxine.   Weight gain with a voracious appetite is something I experienced while malnourished.  It's symptomatic of Thiamine B1 deficiency.   Conversely, some people with thiamine deficiency lose their appetite altogether, and suffer from anorexia.  At different periods on my lifelong journey, I suffered this, too.   When the body doesn't have sufficient thiamine to turn food, especially carbohydrates, into energy (for growth and repair), the body rations what little thiamine it has available, and turns the carbs into fat, and stores it mostly in the abdomen.  Consuming a high carbohydrate diet requires additional thiamine to process the carbs into energy.  Simple carbohydrates (sugar, white rice, etc.) don't contain thiamine, so the body easily depletes its stores of Thiamine processing the carbs into fat.  The digestive system communicates with the brain to keep eating in order to consume more thiamine and other nutrients it's not absorbing.   One can have a subclinical thiamine insufficiency for years.  A twenty percent increase in dietary thiamine causes an eighty percent increase in brain function, so the symptoms can wax and wane mysteriously.  Symptoms of Thiamine insufficiency include stunted growth, chronic fatigue, and Gastrointestinal Beriberi (diarrhea, abdominal pain), heart attack, Alzheimer's, stroke, and cancer.   Thiamine improves bone turnover.  Thiamine insufficiency can also affect the thyroid.  The thyroid is important in bone metabolism.  The thyroid also influences hormones, like estrogen and progesterone, and menopause.  Vitamin D, at optimal levels, can act as a hormone and can influence the thyroid, as well as being important to bone health, and regulating the immune system.  Vitamin A is important to bone health, too, and is necessary for intestinal health, as well.   I don't do dairy because I react to Casein, the protein in dairy that resembles gluten and causes a reaction the same as if I'd been exposed to gluten, including high tTg IgA.  I found adding mineral water containing calcium and other minerals helpful in increasing my calcium intake.   Malabsorption of Celiac affects all the vitamins and minerals.  I do hope you'll talk to your doctor and dietician about supplementing all eight B vitamins and the four fat soluble vitamins because they all work together interconnectedly.  
    • Florence Lillian
      Hi Jane: You may want to try the D3 I now take. I have reactions to fillers and many additives. Sports Research, it is based in the USA and I have had no bad reactions with this brand. The D3 does have coconut oil but it is non GMO, it is Gluten free, Soy free, Soybean free and Safflower oil free.  I have a cupboard full of supplements that did not agree with me -  I just keep trying and have finally settled on Sports Research. I take NAKA Women's Multi full spectrum, and have not felt sick after taking 2 capsules per day -  it is a Canadian company. I buy both from Amazon. I wish you well in your searching, I know how discouraging it all is. Florence.  
    • catnapt
      highly unlikely  NOTHING and I mean NOTHING else has ever caused me these kinds of symptoms I have no problem with dates, they are a large part of my diet In fact, I eat a very high fiber, very high vegetable and bean diet and have for many years now. It's considered a whole foods plant based or plant forward diet (I do now eat some lean ground turkey but not much) I was off dairy for years but recently had to add back plain yogurt to meet calcium needs that I am not allowed to get from supplements (I have not had any problem with the yogurt)   I eat almost no processed foods. I don't eat out. almost everything I eat, I cook myself I am going to keep a food diary but to be honest, I already know that it's wheat products and also barley that are the problem, which is why I gradually stopped eating and buying them. When I was eating them, like back in early 2024, when I was in the middle of moving and ate out (always had bread or toast or rolls or a sub or pizza) I felt terrible but at that time was so busy and exhausted that I never stopped to think it was the food. Once I was in my new place, I continued to have bread from time to time and had such horrible joint pain that I was preparing for 2 total knee replacements as well as one hip! The surgery could not go forward as I was (and still am) actively losing calcium from my bones. That problem has yet to be properly diagnosed and treated   anyway over time I realized that I felt better when I stopped eating bread. Back at least 3 yrs ago I noticed that regular pasta made me sick so I switched to brown rice pasta and even though it costs a lot more, I really like it.   so gradually I just stopped buying and eating foods with gluten. I stopped getting raisin bran when I was constipated because it made me bloated and it didn't help the constipation any more (used to be a sure bet that it would in the past)   I made cookies and brownies using beans and rolled oats and dates and tahini and I LOVE them and have zero issues eating those I eat 1 or more cans of beans per day easily can eat a pound of broccoli - no problem! Brussels sprouts the same thing.   so yeh it's bread and related foods that are clearly the problem  there is zero doubt in my mind    
    • cristiana
      Thank you for your post, @nanny marley It is interesting what you say about 'It's OK not to sleep'. Worrying about sleeping only makes it much harder to sleep.  One of my relatives is an insomniac and I am sure that is part of the problem.  Whereas I once had a neighbour who, if she couldn't sleep, would simply get up again, make a cup of tea, read, do a sudoku or some other small task, and then go back to bed when she felt sleepy again.  I can't think it did her any harm - she lived  well into her nineties. Last week I decided to try a Floradix Magnesium supplement which seems to be helping me to sleep better.  It is a liquid magnesium supplement, so easy to take.  It is gluten free (unlike the Floradix iron supplement).  Might be worth a try.        
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

NOTICE: This site places This site places cookies on your device (Cookie settings). on your device. Continued use is acceptance of our Terms of Use, and Privacy Policy.