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The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original


TriticusToxicum

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Darn210 Enthusiast

I thinks everyone must be askert of Kween Giannniitt, though, they's staying away in droves

. . . and I thought it was because I smelled :ph34r:

Susie!!!! So good to see you!!!!

. . . and a late in the day Happy Birfday to LeeeeSuhhhhhh!!! Hope it was a good'n. :D


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mushroom Proficient

. . . and I thought it was because I smelled :ph34r:

Loses some of its pong!! on the way across the ocean, I guess. :P

celiac-mommy Collaborator

oral

Leeesargh said oral :P:P

So I've decided to go vegan. I've been vegetarian for a while now, seems like the next step, especially since I started reading The Kind Diet. I've NEVER been so grossed out in my life. Do you know HOW hard it is to be gluten-free AND vegan with minimal soy AND get everything you need????!!!!!! I shall figure it out-day one was delish, I must say :)

So I go to Whole paycheck Foods (3 bags of groceries plus a 5$ gallon of milk for 108$ <_< ) I get home, grab the 3 bags in one hand, the gallon of milk in the other and try to shut the Prius hatch-dropping the 5$ gallon of moojoo on the driveway, busting open and I'm watching my money flow down the street. I hose off the driveway (it ended up running downhill into my neighbor's garden :huh: ). I'm a little peeved at this point, but I realize I forgot the salsa for our vegan burritos, hafta go back to the store anyways. Go to the store, spend 5$ more for the milk and get my salse. Get home, set the bag on the kitchen table, the flippin salsa flippin tips over and flippin rolls out of the bag, off the table and SHATTERS on my kitchen floor and all up the legs of my freshly laundered jeans <_< I'm frustrated beyond belief at this point, but I don't start screaming obscenities UNTIL I try to clean up the mess, dh tells me "there's something wrong with the kitchen sink, I put some Draino to see if that helps" As I'm

turning on the disposal, as the flippin water EXPLODES out of the drain and all down my new Lucky blouse and my freshly laundered Hudson jeans--flippin DRAINO all over my flippin clothes!!! I immediately put them into the washer, I'm praying they're OK.

I'm not leaving my house or cooking anything else today!!! (at least the burritos were amazing!!)

Vodka is vegan, right?? :blink:

psawyer Proficient
Vodka is vegan, right?? :blink:

Absolutely. Cheers! ;)
curlyfries Contributor

Leeesargh said oral :P:P

Not the first time :P

That's not the Drano that says NOT to use it on garbage disposals, is it? :unsure:

And if I were you, I wouldn't even TOUCH anything for the rest of the day! :rolleyes:

celiac-mommy Collaborator

That's not the Drano that says NOT to use it on garbage disposals, is it? :unsure:

That'd be the one. Dumbass (she says lovingly) :rolleyes:

nikki-uk Enthusiast

PINCH, PUNCH, PHIRST DAY OF THE MONTH!!!!!!!!!!

Hey peeps!!!!!

The puppers are BAAAACK!!!!!!!!!!!!

:D

LISA! Hope you had a great birphday :D

Did I miss Soozelle poop in?? :( ...and poor wheezee!

OMGAAAaaaaaawd, Rachelle's becoming vegan?!?! :blink:

Hat's off to you my luv - my body barely copes with being gluten-free (Um, back to docs for another rounds of bloods 'cos I've all the symptoms of severe anaemia again <_< )

I did try casein free with gluten-free for around a year - but was worried about me teeth/calcium thing

....which brings me to my next point.

Am seeing dentist this evening at 6pm - hold me :unsure:

I am falling apart (body & mind :lol: )

Today is DC's 15th birfday, & it's about as UN happy-a- birthday I've ever witnessed <_<

BAH!!, sometimes I wish I could fast forward my life :rolleyes:


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elye Community Regular

Gooood morning, Psillies!

OMG, Rah-shyellle... . . .a salsa-Draino soup all over yerself?? Haynus. Those couple o' minutes in your kitchen must have been quite the classic America's Funniest Home Video moments.. . ....GAH! <_<:o

Gnick! Best of luck a la dentiste. .....is he good-looking? In this rare instance, one hopes for little thumbs on such an individual - - a small-fingered (hell, handed) dentist, methinks, is more welcoming, visually... . .....don't have to crane your mouth open as far, he's in and out faster, less fumbling around... ... . . ...

Hey. . .. . ....I'm talking dental work, here.. ..! <_<

:lol:

flourgirl Apprentice

Hi all! Did a quick cruise through the last pages. I really need to make the time to stay caught up here. I miss youse guys. I'm in the process of packing to make the trip home. Dad did so well for the first few days. They took him off the oxygen, and took him for a few spins in a wheelchair. The plan was to get him to a rehab facility asap because he was ready! I woke yesterday with the most awful feeling and a driving need to go home. Good thing no one was around me because I had a terrible weepy/sad distracted day. Got a phone call from my sister that Dad is back on oxygen....back in bed and not doing well at all. I think that maybe he's come to realize that the paralysis (from the chest down) really is permanent and that his life will be drastically different. I'm so afraid that he might just give up. He has always been so strong, so active, so independant. So....I'm packing, and digging up maps. Please keep him (and the rest of us) in prayer. Thanks for the support you've already given.

Jestgar Rising Star

T - I'm of the opinion that things are only permanent if you decide them to be. Convince your dad that giving up is really the paralysis he needs to avoid.

nikki-uk Enthusiast

Gnick! Best of luck a la dentiste. .....is he good-looking? In this rare instance, one hopes for little thumbs on such an individual - - a small-fingered (hell, handed) dentist, methinks, is more welcoming, visually... . .....don't have to crane your mouth open as far, he's in and out faster, less fumbling around... ... . . ...

Hey. . .. . ....I'm talking dental work, here.. ..! <_<

:lol: *snort*!!!

I love a good old fashioned 'double entendre'

May have all me teeph out and demand a full set of 'falsies' so

  1. 1. I Never have to return
    2. I Never have to return (did I mention this one already? :unsure: )

Sadly, the short in stature but calming Egyptian man that is my dentist has (If I recall) rather small thumbs <_<

Hi all! Did a quick cruise through the last pages. I really need to make the time to stay caught up here. I miss youse guys. I'm in the process of packing to make the trip home. Dad did so well for the first few days. They took him off the oxygen, and took him for a few spins in a wheelchair. The plan was to get him to a rehab facility asap because he was ready! I woke yesterday with the most awful feeling and a driving need to go home. Good thing no one was around me because I had a terrible weepy/sad distracted day. Got a phone call from my sister that Dad is back on oxygen....back in bed and not doing well at all. I think that maybe he's come to realize that the paralysis (from the chest down) really is permanent and that his life will be drastically different. I'm so afraid that he might just give up. He has always been so strong, so active, so independant. So....I'm packing, and digging up maps. Please keep him (and the rest of us) in prayer. Thanks for the support you've already given.

Oh Tea, I saw your post over on FB

We're all behind you in this difficult time! :wub:

Take care!

P.S I LOVE Jess! ♥ - she is wise!

elye Community Regular

T - I'm of the opinion that things are only permanent if you decide them to be. Convince your dad that giving up is really the paralysis he needs to avoid.

SOoOoooo true, what Jyessss has poignantly said. I'm thinking about you and your family, Tareeesuh... . . ....:wub:. . . . . I sure know what your pain feels like. There is nothing I have ever experienced before, and I know nothing I shall ever again, that has equalled the pain and stress of seeing my big, strong, invincible dad reduced to a helpless, frail old man. He did not last too long like this, and I so wish he had, because we can help, support and get used to ANY form that our loved ones are in. You sound like such an amazing family - - you can absolutely keep him hopeful!

Sadly, the short in stature but calming Egyptian man that is my dentist has (If I recall) rather small thumbs <_<

Gnick, this is a GOOD thang, remember? In and out, less fumbling, can reach further... . ......<_<:rolleyes:

psawyer Proficient

Thinking of you and your dad, T. My psilly is still missing.

Mtndog Collaborator

Just wanted to poop in and say I'm thinking of you Teereesa and wishing the best for you and your dad. Sending :wub: :wub:

Darn210 Enthusiast

... wishing the best for you and your dad. Sending :wub: :wub:

Me 2 Tee!!!

Psillies . . . I need a vacation from my life!!! . . . but wait, I always gain weight whilst on vacation . . . hmmmmm, gonna hafta think about this one.

Subbed at the preschool today. Seriously thinking about not going back next year. There's a job at a nursery (ummmm, trees & stuff, NOT babies) down the road that sounds so appealing to me . . . but I know the preschool job fits my life better at the moment since my kiddos are too young to stay by themselves.

Nikki's slappin' us around again . . . is it bad that I look forward to that? What would Dr. Phil say?

nikki-uk Enthusiast

Subbed at the preschool today. Seriously thinking about not going back next year. There's a job at a nursery (ummmm, trees & stuff, NOT babies) down the road that sounds so appealing to me . . . but I know the preschool job fits my life better at the moment since my kiddos are too young to stay by themselves.

I know which Nursery I'd prefer ;):lol:

...but yeah, finding work to fit in with the chidlins often ironically means working wiv other people's :blink:

Nikki's slappin' us around again . . . is it bad that I look forward to that? What would Dr. Phil say?

:unsure: I dunno!....BUT I knew you loved it !!!!!

Think I need a vacation from my liphe too - let's go and get fat together!! :lol:

Where shall we go??

Ok, I survived the dentist.... he couldn't find any cavities/loss of filling

Summat weird going on - in the 3 months since I saw him last he said my gums have deteriorated, become inflamed, bleed at the slightest touch.

It is this that is making my teeth uber sensitive :blink:

I canna remember the last time I was able to drink cold water.

Anyhoo, he prodded ,poked, tapped and scraped - declared my gums had 'dropped' (what?? :unsure: , like a pair of baggy old knickers?) and recommended I buy a sh*t load of stuff (toofpastes, l'il brushes,moofwash etc ...£££)

Apparently I have BIG gaps between me molars (he could easily get one of his small thumbs in) These areas were attacked by him and his tool mini ice pick scraper

...and then blasted with a jet of arctic high pressured air.

OUCH :o

WIH's happening to me body??....earlier on me GP declared me still severely anaemic and wants to start tests to discover why....the first of which is a scan of my abdomen area :blink:

GADS!! - I is old!!! :lol:

*********************************************

Hoping T has arrived safely, and thinking of her and her family ♥ ♥

elye Community Regular

Mornin', Peeps!

Gnickers. ... ... . .....sandblasting of gums . .. ......ick. Every second person with whom I speak seems to be afflicted with receding gums. I am, and DH is. He boldly ventured to the periodontist and had skin grafted onto the problem areas at the gumline - - hurt like sh!t at the time, but it solved the problem of the ridiculous sensitivity. Like you, Gnick, he could only drink room-temperature liquids, and forget ice cream. The proceedure wasn't cheap, but it ended up practically paying for itself in the cessation of all the anti-bacterial tools/pastes/washes he had been buying for years.

Yup... . . ..we IS old. <_<

Jestgar Rising Star

Psillies . . . I need a vacation from my life!!! . . . but wait, I always gain weight whilst on vacation . . . hmmmmm, gonna hafta think about this one.

Think I need a vacation from my liphe too - let's go and get fat together!! :lol:

Where shall we go??

Come on vacation with me, I always lose weight. We'll stop in to see T, then head out to walk every street and alley in Spain. Sadly, the rule of travel is that all the cool stuff is always uphill, so we'll be hiking up 45 degree angles a lot.

After 4 weeks of traveling with me you'll be delighted to be home (I always am).

elye Community Regular

Sadly, the rule of travel is that all the cool stuff is always uphill, so we'll be hiking up 45 degree angles a lot.

:lol::lol: 'Tis not really funny, but somehow this brought out a big guffaw from me. . ....

Well, the Grand Canyon is downhill, but then one has to get back out, doesn't one?

Martok42 Rookie

Best show ever. It really makes me forget about the fact that I have a ailment :D IT's called Mystery Science Theater 3000 or MST3K for short. Here are some of the best episodes. There is nothing you need to know before hand, they explain all in teh theme song!

Open Original Shared Link

Open Original Shared Link

Open Original Shared Link This on is SO funny!

celiac-mommy Collaborator

Me 2 Tee!!!

Mee Three Tee!!

Plumber wasn't able to come out until 4pm yesterday, so I was forced to boil pots and pots of water and do all my dishes by hand :o I HATE doing dishes anyway, let alone by hand. Then I don't think they're clean enough (OCD), no matter how hard I scrub, so I then boiled all my silverware to ensure their sanitiznicity. This plus the mountain of laundry since dh is now home, ended up being a tired and grumpy evening. I did drag my kids' 13" TV from the playroom, locked meselph into the bathroom and took a boiling hot bath and watched the Bachelor. If anyone else is watching that stupid show, he's an idiot I tell ya!! VIENNA?????? WTF????

Today isn't much better, we are short staffed, I'm covering the OR and clinic, I'm on call AND I forgot my phone at home. Calgon, take me away!! :P

DingoGirl Enthusiast

Soozle!!!!!!! Are you my birthday present????

You want a what?........a recap?

Hmmmm.....lets see.....since you've been gone.......

@ @ @ @ @ @ tumbleweeds

It just hasn't been the same around here

Hope the Weezer is OK

Oh.......and Gian-knut is Kween! reluctantly so

Leesargh! shortest re-cap EVER! :blink:

sounds like your birfday was PHUN!

and.......happy to report, Weezee's mystery condition is GONE, she's got the spring in her step and the wag in her tail back :wub: Mommy is RELIEVED!!!!!!

Reluctant Kween Gian-nut! I haven't noticed a stink.....and you all KNOW how sensitive me nose is ;)

So I go to Whole paycheck Foods (3 bags of groceries plus a 5$ gallon of milk for 108$ <_< ) I get home, grab the 3 bags in one hand, the gallon of milk in the other and try to shut the Prius hatch-dropping the 5$ gallon of moojoo on the driveway, busting open and I'm watching my money flow down the street. I hose off the driveway (it ended up running downhill into my neighbor's garden :huh: ). I'm a little peeved at this point, but I realize I forgot the salsa for our vegan burritos, hafta go back to the store anyways. Go to the store, spend 5$ more for the milk and get my salse. Get home, set the bag on the kitchen table, the flippin salsa flippin tips over and flippin rolls out of the bag, off the table and SHATTERS on my kitchen floor and all up the legs of my freshly laundered jeans <_< I'm frustrated beyond belief at this point, but I don't start screaming obscenities UNTIL I try to clean up the mess, dh tells me "there's something wrong with the kitchen sink, I put some Draino to see if that helps" As I'm

turning on the disposal, as the flippin water EXPLODES out of the drain and all down my new Lucky blouse and my freshly laundered Hudson jeans--flippin DRAINO all over my flippin clothes!!! I immediately put them into the washer, I'm praying they're OK.

:lol: so sorry to laff but this was just fantastic......and OMG you're VEGAN??? :unsure: too hard, I'm tellin' ya...too HARD!!

and YES I AM watching The Bachelor and WHAT IN HELL indeed? He sends that cute Corri home adn keeps that pslutty Vienna???? Men :sheesh: <_<

'tis an interesting season in how.......UNinteresting it is......very vapid conversations.....I'm not getting any substance from anyone, really.....I am wondering if they have deeper, more interesting convos when camera is off? Sure hope so....... BTW pulling for Tenley here but I have a feeling he won't pick her....cuz he's stoopid.......

Gnick! Best of luck a la dentiste. .....is he good-looking? In this rare instance, one hopes for little thumbs on such an individual - - a small-fingered (hell, handed) dentist, methinks, is more welcoming, visually... . .....don't have to crane your mouth open as far, he's in and out faster, less fumbling around... ... . . ...

Hey. . .. . ....I'm talking dental work, here.. ..!

:lol: yes, one would want a small-thumbed dentist, methinks...keen observation, Emmel.....

T - I'm of the opinion that things are only permanent if you decide them to be. Convince your dad that giving up is really the paralysis he needs to avoid.

:) so wise, our Geoss.........

Where's my quote from Tea?? Oh Tea....I had NO idea that this was happening.........just knew summat was wrong with your dad....sooooooo glad you're going to see him (there already? what day is this?)....sending prayers your way......

. . I sure know what your pain feels like. There is nothing I have ever experienced before, and I know nothing I shall ever again, that has equalled the pain and stress of seeing my big, strong, invincible dad reduced to a helpless, frail old man. He did not last too long like this, and I so wish he had, because we can help, support and get used to ANY form that our loved ones are in. You sound like such an amazing family - - you can absolutely keep him hopeful!

Oh, how I have missed my Sills :wub: Just so good to read things like this....poignant and beautiful......

GIAN-KNIT!!! I think you need to SWITCH NURSERIES!!!!!! :lol:

Ok, I survived the dentist.... he couldn't find any cavities/loss of filling

Summat weird going on - in the 3 months since I saw him last he said my gums have deteriorated, become inflamed, bleed at the slightest touch.

It is this that is making my teeth uber sensitive :blink:

I canna remember the last time I was able to drink cold water.

Anyhoo, he prodded ,poked, tapped and scraped - declared my gums had 'dropped' (what?? :unsure: , like a pair of baggy old knickers?) and recommended I buy a sh*t load of stuff (toofpastes, l'il brushes,moofwash etc ...

elye Community Regular

Best show ever. It really makes me forget about the fact that I have a ailment :D IT's called Mystery Science Theater 3000 or MST3K for short. Here are some of the best episodes. There is nothing you need to know before hand, they explain all in teh theme song!

Open Original Shared Link

Open Original Shared Link

Open Original Shared Link This on is SO funny!

HellOoOoOooooo Martok! Being up here, I could only open your last link (verrrrry phunny) :lol:. We Commonwealthers cannot gain access to many American sites.. . . . .....tightly maintained security issues, one supposes. Ya cannot just let the Canadians see everything - - lord, who knows what kind of hell might break loose?? <_<

:lol:

'tis an interesting season in how.......UNinteresting it is......very vapid conversations.....I'm not getting any substance from anyone, really.....

Um. . . . . ..Soooooze.. . ..are you, uh.. . .. .... . .......... . . ....surprised........ . . .. . . . . ......by this? You were not expecting John Steinbeck nor Orson Welles, were you? :lol:

Have severely receding gums (wonder if my teeth will fall out?) and have to microwave to room temp my cereal, salad, everything......for cleanings I go to the college here, takes two full afternoons as they have to fully numb my mouth or I WILL *DIE* - can't numb whole mouth at once.......just excruciating.....

what IS wrong wiv us? :unsure:

I have often thought about a connection to celiac. Imagine bringing that up HERE? <_<:rolleyes:

An old thread from here.. .. ....

https://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/index.php?showtopic=9631

celiac-mommy Collaborator

:lol: so sorry to laff but this was just fantastic......and OMG you're VEGAN??? :unsure: too hard, I'm tellin' ya...too HARD!!

and YES I AM watching The Bachelor and WHAT IN HELL indeed? He sends that cute Corri home adn keeps that pslutty Vienna???? Men :sheesh: <_<

'tis an interesting season in how.......UNinteresting it is......very vapid conversations.....I'm not getting any substance from anyone, really.....I am wondering if they have deeper, more interesting convos when camera is off? Sure hope so....... BTW pulling for Tenley here but I have a feeling he won't pick her....cuz he's stoopid.......

I've been vegetarian for a while, have slowly given everything up but fish and eggs. I'm trying vegan full-on for 4 weeks to see how do-able it is. I swear Portland has to be the vegan capital of the US!! :rolleyes: I saw a portion of the documentary, Food INC, and I need to see the rest of it to see if it was all as horrific as the part I saw. I can't eat eggs now. If I raised my own chickens, I would eat them all day long, but nae from a store, no more!!!! 19247.webp

As for the bachelor, I pheel like I've been losing brain cells as fast as that man is dumping women. I've been OK with his decisions so far, but pseriously, "Princess" VIENNA???? Are you flippin JOKING??? Next week shall be interesting fo'sho!

Darn210 Enthusiast

Helloooooooo??????

Where is everyone????

Well, Skeeter has her GI appt today. I figure we won't have any answers for a while. This will just be the appt to start testing for certain things. I'm leaning towards an allergy at this point . . . although I don't know what it's an allergy of . . . but benedryl seemed to make her stop regurgitating for a while. Since it made her sleepy, we switched to Clariten, but that doesn't seem to work as well. The antacids are all cr@p at this point.

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      Hi Jane: You may want to try the D3 I now take. I have reactions to fillers and many additives. Sports Research, it is based in the USA and I have had no bad reactions with this brand. The D3 does have coconut oil but it is non GMO, it is Gluten free, Soy free, Soybean free and Safflower oil free.  I have a cupboard full of supplements that did not agree with me -  I just keep trying and have finally settled on Sports Research. I take NAKA Women's Multi full spectrum, and have not felt sick after taking 2 capsules per day -  it is a Canadian company. I buy both from Amazon. I wish you well in your searching, I know how discouraging it all is. Florence.  
    • catnapt
      highly unlikely  NOTHING and I mean NOTHING else has ever caused me these kinds of symptoms I have no problem with dates, they are a large part of my diet In fact, I eat a very high fiber, very high vegetable and bean diet and have for many years now. It's considered a whole foods plant based or plant forward diet (I do now eat some lean ground turkey but not much) I was off dairy for years but recently had to add back plain yogurt to meet calcium needs that I am not allowed to get from supplements (I have not had any problem with the yogurt)   I eat almost no processed foods. I don't eat out. almost everything I eat, I cook myself I am going to keep a food diary but to be honest, I already know that it's wheat products and also barley that are the problem, which is why I gradually stopped eating and buying them. When I was eating them, like back in early 2024, when I was in the middle of moving and ate out (always had bread or toast or rolls or a sub or pizza) I felt terrible but at that time was so busy and exhausted that I never stopped to think it was the food. Once I was in my new place, I continued to have bread from time to time and had such horrible joint pain that I was preparing for 2 total knee replacements as well as one hip! The surgery could not go forward as I was (and still am) actively losing calcium from my bones. That problem has yet to be properly diagnosed and treated   anyway over time I realized that I felt better when I stopped eating bread. Back at least 3 yrs ago I noticed that regular pasta made me sick so I switched to brown rice pasta and even though it costs a lot more, I really like it.   so gradually I just stopped buying and eating foods with gluten. I stopped getting raisin bran when I was constipated because it made me bloated and it didn't help the constipation any more (used to be a sure bet that it would in the past)   I made cookies and brownies using beans and rolled oats and dates and tahini and I LOVE them and have zero issues eating those I eat 1 or more cans of beans per day easily can eat a pound of broccoli - no problem! Brussels sprouts the same thing.   so yeh it's bread and related foods that are clearly the problem  there is zero doubt in my mind    
    • cristiana
      Thank you for your post, @nanny marley It is interesting what you say about 'It's OK not to sleep'. Worrying about sleeping only makes it much harder to sleep.  One of my relatives is an insomniac and I am sure that is part of the problem.  Whereas I once had a neighbour who, if she couldn't sleep, would simply get up again, make a cup of tea, read, do a sudoku or some other small task, and then go back to bed when she felt sleepy again.  I can't think it did her any harm - she lived  well into her nineties. Last week I decided to try a Floradix Magnesium supplement which seems to be helping me to sleep better.  It is a liquid magnesium supplement, so easy to take.  It is gluten free (unlike the Floradix iron supplement).  Might be worth a try.        
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