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The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original


TriticusToxicum

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Darn210 Enthusiast
Good questions for us, Jess. The Ripper posed this one to me this morning:

Why do superheroes all wear tights?

Makes you more aerodynamic???

Forces them develop more super powers to defend themselves after being called "sissy" all the time??


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Darn210 Enthusiast
As a complete non-sequitur, it's common to name your freezers in science, and ours are named after superheroes. Catwoman, Wonder Woman, etc. The double freezer is Batman and Robin, two entities, yet joined together. I forget why they didn't get named The Wonder Twins, but there was a discussion about it.

My freezer got named The Punisher.... :blink::unsure:

Hmmmmm . . . shall have to name all me appliances now . . . will have to give it some thought.

. . . and I don't recall a bat story, Jess . . . let's hear it.

DingoGirl Enthusiast
But Susie, it really does happen in real life...

:lol: just watched this, fantastic

Sooooozie! I want to be in your job!! Wif your boss!! Wow... .. things are so.....staid.. . . . .....professional. . . ..... . . ordinary........in my places of work. I want one o' MY bosses to call me a beeotch! :lol:

Um...well.......it would be une connasse at the French Embassy.......uno arpia in Spanish. . . .... ...

Sounds so much nicer, doesn't it? I am uno arpia. . .. . ...

une connasse!!!!!!!!! thanks for remindin me Em, phorgot it :lol:

I just bought another musical :ph34r:

Open Original Shared Link

a scene:

:o dear gawd, she bought that one?????? :lol: :lol: they played it at midnight all through my high school years.......everyone always went and, I will say to you, I think I am the only person in Fresno of that era who never once went to Rocky Horror :blink:

would stab myself in the heart, just in the first few minutes of it - pure torture :lol:

MORNIN PSILLIES!!!!!!!!!

We're finding silly where we can, here. Many of Nathan's tests for tick-borne diseases won't have results in for 4-6 weeks, so they've put him on some meds for them now, just in case. The anti-fungul is giving him hallucinations.........quite entertaining.

We had Russian doll heads dancing around the room

A good friend of Nathan's flew down for a visit.......I don't think a serious sentence ever comes out of her mouth.......it's been good for all of us.

Carry on with the psillie, friends! I have been pooping in from time to time, and I don't want to see un-silly psillies

LEESARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :wub:

so good to hear from you and....good to hear about the hallucinations also, those are ALWAYS fun!!!!! :lol:

you've all been in my thoughts............so glad to see you keepin the silly, it's the only way :)

So glad you pooped in Lisa!!! . . . Hope they get to the bottom of this quickly and get Nathan back to form quick . . . perhaps he needs a steriod?? . . . or a visit from Em's Nan??:P (But seriously . . . I'll keep prayin')

*snort* visit from Em's Nan would be FANTASTIC!!!!!!!!!!! :lol: glad Smackl's feeling better

OK, I'll pose some questions for y'all. Not silly, but not serious either.

My friend's husband got laid off several months ago and still hasn't found a job. D'ta think I should/could ask if I can hire him to do stuff around my house? I got lots of stuff on my to-do list....

Question 2. I don't look as old as I am. Last week someone made a comment something like "I'm probably twice your age", when she's maybe 15-20 years older. I just laughed. What do you say in those situations; "No, I'm a lot older than you think I am"? "You don't look 90 to me"?

:lol: um............as for the first - - I dunno

the second - don't say anything - safer that way - -

and the BATS???????? what bats?????? dear gawd - I am terrified of them

the Punisher :lol:

Good questions for us, Jess. The Ripper posed this one to me this morning:

Why do superheroes all wear tights?

A good one. . . . ....just dunno...

:lol:

Em - a name fer yer freezer......must ponder

good saturday aft, sillies.......

I haven't got much silly, just plugging away........'tis a FACADE of silliness <_<

But there's Judith, and padt

<waving madly>

debmidge Rising Star
Question 2. I don't look as old as I am. Last week someone made a comment something like "I'm probably twice your age", when she's maybe 15-20 years older. I just laughed. What do you say in those situations; "No, I'm a lot older than you think I am"? "You don't look 90 to me"?

No, just agree with her repeatedly.

A Couple of years ago a condo assn went up for 55+; my husband being 55 was eligible so I called the contractor's office to discuss pricing, etc. The woman who answered the phone spoke with me a while and then said : "...your voice is so young....you can't be 55 years old (to qualify) (I was younger than 55) " I told her that I was 55 but I had a "voice lift."

We didn't look into the condos after all because they started at $500,000 per unit! They were nice, but built over mercantile stores, restaurants, bar, etc.

Jestgar Rising Star
Hmmmmm . . . shall have to name all me appliances now . . . will have to give it some thought.

. . . and I don't recall a bat story, Jess . . . let's hear it.

We also have Robbie the robot. Robbie was chosen as a name because we didn't know what gender the robot was, however, after working with Robbie for 5 years I can definitely report that he is a boy - does what he's told without providing any thought, needs constant supervision, and frequently stops working for no particular reason.

Nefertiti, our awesome, powerful computer, is female: brilliant, keeps going even when no one is there to mind her, and does 8 tasks at once.

Bat story is old.

When I lived in Armenia, the attic of the building in which I lived was full of bats. One of their entrances was around my bedroom window which was full of cracks. I was fine with this. I liked to sit on my window sill and listen to them chatter during the day. As long as I closed my window before dusk, I wasn't worried about unexpected visitors.

One day I was visiting at a neighbor's and forgot that I had left my window open. I came home late and my cat was sitting, staring intently at the current that separated the living room from the back bedrooms. Took a while, but I finally shook the bat out, and he started flying around my living room. I opened the doors to the balcony and tried to shoo him that direction, but he ended up going back into my bedroom.

So I went into the bedroom, closed the door (leaving the cat on the other side), and opened the window, which I had closed when I came home earlier. While I was trying to shoo this terrified little bat out the window, four more came in. Now here I am in this little bedroom with all these bats circling my head and the cat yelling from the other room "MOM! I'll save you! LET ME IN!"

I managed to get them all out but one, and he finally fell to the floor from exhaustion (I don't think bats engage in wing flapping flying for extended periods of time. I think they're gliders). Anyway, I put on some gloves (could have been oven mitts), picked him up, and put him outside on the window sill. And closed the window.

Never left my window open again...

Jestgar Rising Star
No, just agree with her repeatedly.

A Couple of years ago a condo assn went up for 55+; my husband being 55 was eligible so I called the contractor's office to discuss pricing, etc. The woman who answered the phone spoke with me a while and then said : "...your voice is so young....you can't be 55 years old (to qualify) (I was younger than 55) " I told her that I was 55 but I had a "voice lift."

We didn't look into the condos after all because they started at $500,000 per unit! They were nice, but built over mercantile stores, restaurants, bar, etc.

:lol: :lol:

My mom always got asked if her mother was home... :lol: :lol:

elye Community Regular

Hi, Debmidge! Voice lift :lol:

You know, I must tell you something. . . ..you have a very young written voice, as well. . . . .. ... ..

:huh:

:rolleyes:

*snort* visit from Em's Nan would be FANTASTIC!!!!!!!!!!! :lol:

:lol: Aye.... . . . she would be insisting on bein' the full-time Queen around here, I tell ya.....not wait, that's my MIL....... . . ..Nan would be telling us all to get off our big arses and "get outside into that air!"

Bats....we have discussed them in The Ville before, as I have a vague memory of speaking about the little brown bat we saw up in a corner of our bedroom a few years ago, right where the wall meets the ceiling. DH went rummaging in the basement for some, any, implement.....came back with a tennis racket and proceeded to squish it. Gah.


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Jestgar Rising Star

I was checking on a word to be certain I was spelling it correctly and came across this:

English

Verb

Infinitive

to hork

Third person singular

horks

Simple past

horked

Past participle

horked

Present participle

horking

1. (slang) To foul up; to be broken.

I downloaded the program, but something is horked and it won't load.

2. (slang, regional) To steal.

Can I hork that code from you for my project?

3. (slang) To throw.

Let's go hork pickles at people from the back row of the movie theatre.

4. (slang, offensive) To snort from the sinuses. (Similar to hocking.)

I felt something plugging up sinuses, so I horked a big loogie.

5. (slang, rare, obscure) To vomit. (obscure???)

I just horked up my breakfast.

6. (slang) To gobble.

I don't know what got into her, but she horked all those hoagies last night!

8. (slang, transitive) To move; specifically in an egregious fashion

Go hork the kegs from out back, and then go to the party across the street and hork some girls back.

(I took out the naughty ones)

For some reason the juxtaposing of Hork along with proper grammatical explanations strikes me as very funny. Good to know, however, that hork can be used as a transitive verb. :blink:

psawyer Proficient
Question 2. I don't look as old as I am. Last week someone made a comment something like "I'm probably twice your age", when she's maybe 15-20 years older. I just laughed. What do you say in those situations; "No, I'm a lot older than you think I am"? "You don't look 90 to me"?

Most women I know would be flattered to be mistaken for someone younger. Mind you, I am past associating with the many underage women who are trying to sneak past the doorman at a nightclub. Those girls want to look older than they are. This quickly passes once they actually are of legal age.

Jess, you don't look like you are half-way to eighty, much less ninety. Count your blessings and laugh it off when it happens. ;)

Hork is a verb that I remember from my teenage years, oh so long ago. As we used it, it referred only to one sense, involving expectoration of phlegm. And then spitting in onto the sidewalk or whatever surface was close at hand. :ph34r: :greenfacedguy: Yeah, sometimes one of us would "hork a big one." :ph34r:

elye Community Regular

Hey, I've learned something this evening! "Hork" can take a direct object!! Mah-velussss......... :lol:

Yep, it always meant "to spit" to me growing up, usually a large amount, and onto a sidewalk. . ... .. .

jerseyangel Proficient

My gawd.....I've missed everybody! We're at a hotel for the next few nights....the movers came a day early, on Friday, and got the whole job knocked out in 2 days. Our closing isn't until Tuesday afternoon.

This place has the slowest internet <_< It's taken me forever to catch up on the 3 pages I missed.....

So glad to see Lee-saugh stopping by :) Thinkin' bout ya, lady ;)

Soozle phound some more of her psillie--always good to hear :D

What else......Jess's date :P Great story!

Appliance naming.....superhero's tights......A Deb drop in......Judith's pee jug saga continues.... :lol::lol:

"Hork" :P I remember the same meaning as PeOter does.

Hork :lol: phunny

Darn210 Enthusiast

What I want to know is how Jess was planning on using it??

nikki-uk Enthusiast

Mornings sills :weaksmile:

Of course, thinking of Lisa and family.......

Good questions for us, Jess. The Ripper posed this one to me this morning:

Why do superheroes all wear tights?

:huh:

A good one. . . . ....just dunno...

I believe they may have cellulite and the tights are compression tights, holding it all together,..like :blink:

OH WAIT!....thats ME <_<

pADt IS HOMELESS?!?!?! :o

Judyin Philly Enthusiast

Patti see your on line

just sent you a email but not sure if you still have comcast so sent to both addresses i have.

was so glad to see some words from you sure missed you.

i hope you can relax alittle bit at the hotel.

they better be nice to our 'homeless patte and hubby'

Mornings sills :weaksmile:

Of course, thinking of Lisa and family.......

pADt IS HOMELESS?!?!?! :o

Love to you all and Prayers to our lovely Lisa

Judy

jerseyangel Proficient

:D Yep--homeless and living out of suitcases fer the next week. :lol: I just made toast here in the room, whilst Mark is downstairs enjoying a nice breakfast buffet. :angry: Of course, on the upside, I get to breakphest wif me sillies :D

We're going back to the house today to clean up and then we will head to Jersey to spend the time we have left here wif our boys. :rolleyes:

Be back later......

Jestgar Rising Star

G'mornin. No coffee yet, so no words. Just wanted to greet the east coasters before they all start their real lives.

Jestgar Rising Star
Jess, you don't look like you are half-way to eighty, much less ninety. Count your blessings and laugh it off when it happens. ;)

:wub: :wub: :wub:

Judyin Philly Enthusiast

Morning again

still no coffee :huh: so going to get some. It's grey on the East coast Jess. :huh: what else is new.

Hi again Patti...... ;)

It's a new day folks.

hope it treats everyone well esp. our Lisa and family

jerseyangel Proficient

Mornin' Jess :D

Go getcher coffee! :P

Jestgar Rising Star

OK, can someone please tell me why, out of my whole giant living room, the cats have to puke right where the hallway is.

eeeeww

jerseyangel Proficient
OK, can someone please tell me why, out of my whole giant living room, the cats have to puke right where the hallway is.

Cause that's the place you're most likely to step barephoot? :P

Darn210 Enthusiast
OK, can someone please tell me why, out of my whole giant living room, the cats have to puke right where the hallway is.

eeeeww

'Cause they want to make sure you notice?? . . . do you know who did it??

elye Community Regular
OK, can someone please tell me why, out of my whole giant living room, the cats have to puke right where the hallway is.

Well, in my household it is always, without fail, in the miniscule area of the house where there is any carpeting. Not on the easy, just-wipe-it-up hardwood, noooooooo. <_<

. . . do you know who did it??

Well, you know who didn't do it........yer roomie! 'Cause he's gone!

DD's birthday today. Trying to keep the mood up 'round here... . . ..and today is International Peace Day. Jack's school is having a huge rally/symposium this afternoon. The keynote speaker is Arun Ghandi, Mahatma's grandson. He will be speaking about inner peace, and how it must be nurtured and fostered from infancy so that we can have real outer peace in this troubled world we are in today.

Jack is doing the French emcee-ing. Local TV and radio news channels will be there...perhaps it will end up on youtube! :)

Jestgar Rising Star
'Cause they want to make sure you notice?? . . . do you know who did it??

Lefty's a binge and purge kinda guy. Max is more of a hairball horker. This looked like a Lefty special.

Wow. Jack speaks French? Here all this time I thought Em was just googling her French frases. Turns out she's been asking Jack the whole time! :P

Jestgar Rising Star

aaannnnddd........it's snowing :blink::o :o

This does NOT happen in Seattle. :blink: :blink: :blink:

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