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The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original


TriticusToxicum

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VydorScope Proficient

This might be the only place I travel where additional usages of Altoids and poop humor are considered acceptable in the same thread....


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Darn210 Enthusiast

GAH!!! TOO MUCH FUNNY!!!

I wouldn't want to sit up there on the throne.....

with everyone looking

:unsure:

at my ankles :ph34r::blink:

Oh no, not me :huh::o

I would need a gown in an extra looooonng.

:lol: :lol:

All Hail to the Queen. No tellin' what she'll make us do...like run or some doo-doo stuff. :rolleyes:

Lisa said *doo-doo stuff* :lol:

Try subbing in "eating potato chips" in place of that nasty ex word and it all works out just fine.

Hear!! Hear!! POTATO CHIPS FOR ALL!!!

Actually, there is likely only one poop type.... . . .... ....PU.

:lol: :lol:

Not me . . . I'm the Queen, that means my sh!t doo-doo don't stink.

Jestgar Rising Star

Not me . . . I'm the Queen, that means my sh!t doo-doo don't stink.

Queen Jaughnette the Fragrant? :unsure:

elye Community Regular

All this fecal chatter has made me think of a conversation that DH and I were having not long ago. While we were lying in bed one night, he suddenly asked, "Why do they not make all underwear brown-coloUred?" I suddenly realized that he was right -- various shades of beige into brown would make much better sense than the common white or light blue.......

So, I have been looking high and low, in all shops I'm in, for brown underwear. Off-white can be found everywhere, in men's and ladies'. Brown? Nowhere.

Sometimes great ideas befall us in the wee hours...

:rolleyes:

elye Community Regular

HEY! Lookit what I just found!

Open Original Shared Link

jerseyangel Proficient

Think of the time that would save, not to mention money and resources ;)

I have a pair of brown undies..... I like to match em to the pants / jeans I'm wearing.

Could I BE any more anal?

Darn210 Enthusiast

I have a pair of brown undies..... I like to match em to the pants / jeans I'm wearing.

I thought you were going to say that you like to match em to your eyes . . . :blink:


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kareng Grand Master

Could I BE any more anal?

:lol::lol::lol:

I'm laughing so hard the cat came to see what was going on.

Darn210 Enthusiast

Susie's two day reign:

Operation One-zie, Two-zie, Out Goes Soooozie.

:lol:

OK Pholks . . . I want me somma dat!!! Get postin' in a hurry and get me off of this throne!

jerseyangel Proficient

Susie's two day reign:

One of our phinest moments.....

elye Community Regular

OMG. .. ..Onezie, Twozie... . . ...Forgot all about this.. ....WHAT a battle cry! :lol::lol:

I clearly remember telling my outlaws about this.....we were all out for dinner, and I could barely get the story out, I was larfing so hard...... ..it was somehting like this -- "One of our dear, regular thread contributors became Kween on a Friday, and went out of town for the weekend, where she had no internet access......well, we rallied the troops and put up ONE HUNDRED PAGES of posts, so that her Psillyville reign was over in two days!! ! :lol: Absolutely incredible.....we were singing, putting up laundry lists, haikus..... . . ." :lol::lol:

Around the table, as I guffawed my way through this account, I was met with this:

:huh::huh::huh:dry.gif:huh:dry.gif:huh::huh:

Some people have NO sense of humour.... . . .....

mushroom Proficient

Susie's two day reign:

OK Pholks . . . I want me somma dat!!! Get postin' in a hurry and get me off of this throne!

But your Majesty, you just got there. Is there a pea under your cushion, perhaps?

And really, we are on page two already. You are hardly languishing ignored :rolleyes:

jerseyangel Proficient

Shroom has a point Jan-it....things are picking up around here under yer reign. :)

kareng Grand Master

Shroom has a point Jan-it....things are picking up around here under yer reign. :)

If Patti were to serve some of those cupcakes in her Av, I think we could attract more Psillies!

Lisa Mentor

YES! I was just thinking of those cupcakes yesterday. :D

kareng Grand Master

YES! I was just thinking of those cupcakes yesterday. :D

Perhaps we should bring the wine? ;)

celiac-mommy Collaborator

Hi B)

It's been a while! I really, REALLY miss yous guys!!!!!!!

mushroom Proficient

Welcome back, Rayshelle :D :D We've missed you too.

Darn210 Enthusiast

Hmmmm . . . Karen mentions "wine" and look who shows up??

Hiya Rachelle!!! Good to see you.

kareng Grand Master

Hey Russell! Welcome back!

Merlot? Or Chard?

celiac-mommy Collaborator

Thanks :wub:

I know I've missed a LOT! I'm going to attempt to go back and read through, but I have a feeling I'm going to be pretending I know what's going on :P

Short synopsis of my life in the past few months:

-Still not divorced :wacko: , guy is still crazy as ever, but I *think* we're getting close to submitting the final papers...

-Kids are doing amazing! 11 and 7 now and I'm closer to them than I've ever been :wub:

-dating the most amazing man that I've actually known since birth and we reconnected this year

-Still working at the same hospital

-Kids and I live in a 2 bedroom apartment so I share a bed w Maddie and she kicks

-my brother and his girlfriend just broke up so he's sleeping on my couch until he finds a place

-Simon the bunny is super fat and happy

-I think boyfriend and I are getting a dog :D

-I'm obsessed with pinterest!!!

I love you guys!!

celiac-mommy Collaborator

Hey Russell! Welcome back!

Merlot? Or Chard?

Moscato. Or vodka. Always vodka ;)

psawyer Proficient

Welcome back, Rachelle! :)

jerseyangel Proficient

Some people have NO sense of humour.... . . .....

Ain't that the troof! :D

If Patti were to serve some of those cupcakes in her Av, I think we could attract more Psillies!

By all means, help yerselphes B)

YES! I was just thinking of those cupcakes yesterday. :D

They were delish--used Betty Crocker yellow cake mix since Jan-it said they make good cup cakes and homemade chocolate buttercream frosting. :rolleyes:

Perhaps we should bring the wine? ;)

Yes! :lol:

Hi B)

It's been a while! I really, REALLY miss yous guys!!!!!!!

Missed you too, Lady! So glad you are back :D :D :D

-I'm obsessed with pinterest!!!

It kinda confuses me :ph34r:

Moscato.

Poifect! :P

kareng Grand Master

Ain't that the troof! :D

By all means, help yerselphes B)

They were delish--used Betty Crocker yellow cake mix since Jan-it said they make good cup cakes and homemade chocolate buttercream frosting. :rolleyes:

Yes! :lol:

Missed you too, Lady! So glad you are back :D :D :D

It kinda confuses me :ph34r:

Poifect! :P

If we want to get thru the next 98 pages quickly, we will need to break these posts ups into individual posts. :)

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    • Dora77
      Sorry for the long post. I’m 18, and I was diagnosed with celiac disease and type 1 diabetes (T1D). My transglutaminase IgA was >128 U/mL, EMA IgA positive twice, and I’m HLA-DQ2 and DQ8 positive. I’ve been completely asymptomatic since diagnosis, even when I cheated with gluten sometimes in the past and used to eat out(2-5 years ago) I don’t get the typical celiac reactions, which makes it really hard to know when (or if) I’ve been glutened. But for the past year, I’ve been the most strict with my diet, and that’s also when a bunch of new issues started. I eat completely glutenfree, never eat out, dont eat food that says „may contain gluten“.   Current Health Problems • Floating, undigested stools for over a year now. Dont think its related to celiac as it was like this since im 17 and not 13-16( i got diagnosed at 13). • Chronic back pain started gradually, worsens with movement, lots of cracking/popping sounds. Been ongoing for a year now. First noticed in the gym. • Abdominal bulge on the right side, not painful but seems to be getting slightly bigger. Doctor didn’t find a hernia on ultrasound, but it was done lying down (I’ve read those can miss hernias). Noticed it like 6 months ago, couldve been there longer. • extremely dry and mildly swollen hands (this started before I started excessive hand-washing), and bloated face. • Signs of inattentive ADHD (noticed over the past 3 years), now combined with severe OCD focused on contamination and cross-contact. • Growth/puberty seemed to started after going gluten-free. Before that I was not developing. Dont know if any of these are because of celiac as my dad doesnt have those and he is a lot less strict gluten-free then me. I also had pancreatic elastase tested four times: values were 46 (very low), 236, 158, and 306 (normal). Gastroenterologist said one normal value is enough and I don’t have EPI. Family doctor prescribed Kreon anyway (after I pushed for it), and I just started taking 1 capsule (10,000 units) with meals 2 days ago, but couldn‘t see effects yet because I’ve been constipated the last few days. Maybe because of thyroid. I don’t have Hashimoto’s. No thyroid antibodies. But I took levothyroxine for slightly low FT4 levels. My thyroid levels fluctuated between borderline low and low-normal. And recently lowered my dose so that may have caused the constipating. I probably didn’t need it in the first place, and am thinking about stopping it soon.   Current Diet Right now, I only eat a very limited set of “safe” foods I prepare myself: • Gluten-free bread with tuna or cheese • Milk and cornflakes • gluten-free cookies/snacks • Bananas (the only fruit I trust right now) I rarely eat other fruits or vegetables, because I’m scared of contamination. My dad, who also has celiac but doesn’t care about CC, buys fruits, and he might’ve picked them up right after handling gluten bread. That makes me feel unsafe eating them. Even fruit at stores or markets feels risky because so many people with gluten on their hands touch them.   My Home Situation (Shared Kitchen) We’re a family of 5. Only my dad and I have celiac. He eats glutenfree but doesn’t care about CC and sometimes (but rarely) cheats. My mom and siblings eat gluten bread at every meal. My mom is honest (so if i ask her to be cautious, she most likely would try to), but doesn’t seem to understand how serious celiac is. She: • Stopped using gluten flour • only cooks gluten-free meals (but they still heat up gluten bread and also cook gluten noodles) • Keeps separate butter/jam/jars for me • Bought me a stainless steel pan Bu we didn’t replace old wooden utensils, cutting boards, or other pans. The new they bought me pan was even carried home in a shopping bag with gluten bread in it, which triggered my OCD. It also has a rubber handle and I’m scared it might still hold onto gluten. Even if it’s washed well, it’s stored next to other pans that were used for gluten food/bread. Our kitchen table is used for eating gluten bread daily. My mom wipes it but not with soap. I’m scared tiny particles remain. If she made gluten-free bread dough on a board at the table, I’d still worry about cross contmaination contamination even with something under the dough and on the table as at one point the dough would probably touch the table. So I stopped eating anything she makes.   I know OCD is making it worse, but I can’t tell how much of my fear is real and how much is anxiety. 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Do I need to worry about touching doorknobs, fridge handles, light switches, etc. that family members touched after eating gluten? What about public places like bus handles or school desks? Or like if i went to the gym, I would be touching stuff all the time, so there will be small amounts of gluten and those would get transferred on my phone if I touch my phone while in the gym. But I want to knos if it would be enough to do damage. 3. Is an endoscopy (without biopsy) enough to tell if my intestines are healed? I’d pay privately if it could help and if i dont get a refferal. Or do i need a biopsy? 4. Could my job (powder coating, sandblasting, etc.) expose me to gluten or damage my intestines through air/dust? 5. Do I need certified gluten-free toothpaste, hand soap, shampoo, or moisturizer? (For example: Vaseline and Colgate don’t contain gluten ingredients but say they can’t guarantee it’s gluten-free.) 6. Is spices like pepper with “may contain traces of gluten” safe if no gluten ingredients are listed? Or does everything need to be labeled gluten-free?  7. Is continuing to only eat my own food the better choice, or could I eventually go back to eating what my mom cooks if she’s careful? 8. is cutlery from dishwasher safe if there are stains? Stuff like knives is used for cutting gluten bread or fork for noodles etc. I often see stains which i dont know if its gluten or something else but our dish washer doesnt seem to make it completely clean. 9. I wash my hands multiple times while preparing food. Do i need to do the same when touching my phone. Like if i touch the fridge handle, I wash my hands then touch the phone. I dont eat while using my phone but i leave it on my bed and pillow and my face could come in contact with where it was.  10. Do i need to clean my phone or laptop if theyve been used by people who eat gluten? 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    • lmemsm
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    • lmemsm
      I've seen a lot of recipes for chia pudding, so I decided to make some with chia, water, cocoa and honey.  Didn't like the taste, so I added ground sunflower and ground pumpkin seed to it.  It tasted okay, but came out more like frosting that pudding.  I used to make pudding with tapioca starch, milk powder, water and sugar.  It came out very good but I haven't figured out what to use to replace the milk powder to make it dairy free.  Most starches will work in place of tapioca starch but quantity varies depending on the type of starch.  If I didn't add enough starch to get a pudding consistency, I'd add gelatin as well to fix it.  Avocado and cocoa makes a good dessert with a pudding like consistency.  Unfortunately, I have a bad reaction to avocados.
    • lmemsm
      Seems like when I find a gluten free product I like, the producer stops manufacturing it and then I have trouble finding a new gluten free source for it.  What's worse, I've been contacting companies to ask if their products are gluten free and they don't even bother to respond.  So, it's making it very hard to find safe replacements.  I was buying teff flour at nuts.com and they no longer carry it.  I noticed Naturevibe has teff and soy flour.  However, I can't get a response as to whether their flours are safe for someone with celiac.  Can't get a response from Aldi if their peas are safe for someone with celiac either.  I know Bob's Red Mill has teff flour but was hoping to get a large quantity.  I've been using up the 20 ounce Bob's Red Mill teff flour too quickly.  Does anyone know of a good source for teff or soy flour?  Any recommendations where to get gluten free beans, peas or lentils?  I found some packages of gluten free beans at Sprouts but not much variety.  I've also been looking for lentil elbow macaroni and it seems like no one is making that now that Tolerant was bought out.  Any suggestions for safe sources for these types of ingredients.  Thanks.
    • chrish42
      All I can say is this site is great!
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