Jump to content

  • Welcome to Celiac.com!

    You have found your celiac tribe! Join us and ask questions in our forum, share your story, and connect with others.



  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A1):

    Celiac.com Sponsor (A1-M):

  • Get Celiac.com Updates:
    Support Our Content
    eNewsletter
    Donate

How About A New Reality Show?

lonewolf

Recommended Posts

lonewolf Collaborator
lonewolf
Posted

I keep seeing commercials for new shows that look boring. I think we need a Celiac reality show. How about this:

Contestants are nominated by Celiacs and those with gluten intolerance. The ones chosen are those who have given their Celiac friends the hardest time.

Contestants get one session with a dietician not well-versed in gluten-free eating. They are then given up to two hours a day of internet research for a week before the actual competition

The night before the first full day, each contestant must consume a double dose of Ex-Lax, just to get in the "mood".

Contestants will be monitored by camera constantly - at home, at friends' homes, out to eat, etc. Any time even a speck of gluten is consumed, the contestant will be required to take a double dose of Ex Lax. For blatant cheating, a triple dose of Ex Lax and a bottle of Syrup of Ipecac must be downed immediately.

Contestants will be required to explain Celiac to all friends, relatives and co-workers - probably 10-20 times during the course of the show. They will be required to eat out and make "safe" choices, but if at any time they don't ask for the chef before ordering, the Ex-Lax rule will take effect. Any product they buy at the store without thoroughly reading labels and/or calling the 1-800 number on the package will also give them the Ex-Lax treatment.

Anyone have anything to add?

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):


tarnalberry Community Regular
tarnalberry
Posted

Ha! that would be amusing to celiacs. too bad everyone else would find it horridly boring. :?

Viola 1 Rookie
Viola 1
Posted
I keep seeing commercials for new shows that look boring. I think we need a Celiac reality show. How about this:

Contestants are nominated by Celiacs and those with gluten intolerance. The ones chosen are those who have given their Celiac friends the hardest time.

Contestants get one session with a dietician not well-versed in gluten-free eating. They are then given up to two hours a day of internet research for a week before the actual competition

The night before the first full day, each contestant must consume a double dose of Ex-Lax, just to get in the "mood".

Contestants will be monitored by camera constantly - at home, at friends' homes, out to eat, etc. Any time even a speck of gluten is consumed, the contestant will be required to take a double dose of Ex Lax. For blatant cheating, a triple dose of Ex Lax and a bottle of Syrup of Ipecac must be downed immediately.

Contestants will be required to explain Celiac to all friends, relatives and co-workers - probably 10-20 times during the course of the show. They will be required to eat out and make "safe" choices, but if at any time they don't ask for the chef before ordering, the Ex-Lax rule will take effect. Any product they buy at the store without thoroughly reading labels and/or calling the 1-800 number on the package will also give them the Ex-Lax treatment.

Anyone have anything to add?

You could put sound effects in the bathrooms ... or maybe just microphones ... the ex lax would provide the sound effects :lol:

And of course all the things that go on in the bedroom with the spouse ... or not go on... if you are spending the night in the bathroom. :( Lord, that sounds all to familiar before gluten free. :rolleyes:

Generic Apprentice
Generic
Posted

ROTFLMAO!

Nantzie Collaborator
Nantzie
Posted

I think that during the time period where the person is being instructed by the dietician and doing research there should be some additional things going on:

- Various levels of exlax and/or ipecac put into their food/drinks. Some days are inexplicably fine, and other days they can barely leave the bathroom.

- On the "good" days, they must wear some sort of fart machine that also emits a foul odor.

- The people around them must roll their eyes, give each other exasperated looks, and ask sarcastic questions.

- The night before the celiac diet starts, the contestant's friends and family must stage an angry intervention. After a good dose of exlax causing him to run to the bathroom all during the intervention, the contestant must be accused of wanting to be sick. The word hypochondriac must be used at least seven times. Therapy must be brought up at least once. Bonus points for the family if a therapist is "facilitating" the intervention.

:D

Sounds like fun to me. I know a couple people I'd nominate.

:lol:

Nancy

debmidge Rising Star
debmidge
Posted

Sounds great. don't forget that the contestant has to be accused of being a picky eater, and it's all in his/her head and the popular "you need a psychiaratrist.

But I can see this as a reality show where a non celiac lives with celiac roommates and has to adopt their eating rules. How long will the non celiac last? Tune in tomorrow.

StrongerToday Enthusiast
StrongerToday
Posted

Personally, I can't wait to go on Jeorpary... "I'll have Food Intolerences for $800, Alex" :P

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):


UR Groovy Explorer
UR Groovy
Posted

I

Jestgar Rising Star
Jestgar
Posted

Can we whack them on the head for those of us that get headaches? How about caffeine pills at night so they can't sleep?

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
I
azmom Newbie
azmom
Posted

Make all of the contestants live in a house w/ 1 bathroom!

jkmunchkin Rising Star
jkmunchkin
Posted
IThe night before the first full day, each contestant must consume a double dose of Ex-Lax, just to get in the "mood".

Contestants will be monitored by camera constantly - at home, at friends' homes, out to eat, etc. Any time even a speck of gluten is consumed, the contestant will be required to take a double dose of Ex Lax. For blatant cheating, a triple dose of Ex Lax and a bottle of Syrup of Ipecac must be downed immediately.

Contestants will be required to explain Celiac to all friends, relatives and co-workers - probably 10-20 times during the course of the show. They will be required to eat out and make "safe" choices, but if at any time they don't ask for the chef before ordering, the Ex-Lax rule will take effect. Any product they buy at the store without thoroughly reading labels and/or calling the 1-800 number on the package will also give them the Ex-Lax treatment.

I think I may pee my pants!!!! Hysterical!

MySuicidalTurtle Enthusiast
MySuicidalTurtle
Posted

How interesting.

Viola 1 Rookie
Viola 1
Posted
I think that during the time period where the person is being instructed by the dietician and doing research there should be some additional things going on:

- Various levels of exlax and/or ipecac put into their food/drinks. Some days are inexplicably fine, and other days they can barely leave the bathroom.

- On the "good" days, they must wear some sort of fart machine that also emits a foul odor.

- The people around them must roll their eyes, give each other exasperated looks, and ask sarcastic questions.

- The night before the celiac diet starts, the contestant's friends and family must stage an angry intervention. After a good dose of exlax causing him to run to the bathroom all during the intervention, the contestant must be accused of wanting to be sick. The word hypochondriac must be used at least seven times. Therapy must be brought up at least once. Bonus points for the family if a therapist is "facilitating" the intervention.

:D

Sounds like fun to me. I know a couple people I'd nominate.

:lol:

Nancy

:lol::lol: This is good Nancy! :lol:

marciab Enthusiast
marciab
Posted

Better yet. Let's make all the contestants doctors !!!

I would like for them to be zapped on a regular basis too so they know what seizures feel like ... and put weights on their feet so their legs are heavy ... and feed them caffeine or something so that they have brain fog ...

THis is good .. revenge of the celiacs ... marcia

chrissy Collaborator
chrissy
Posted

some of them have to be randomly rubbed with fiberglass insulation so they get the DH effect.

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted

This is fantastic...but there must be a celiac voted off each week. The gassiest, perhaps. And how can each contestant acquire immunity? I would say the bloke who makes it through a day completely gluten-free--no cross contamination. Perhaps there would have to be a lab tech there, busily testing every contestant's stool samples at day's end for traces of the offending toxin.

Jestgar Rising Star
Jestgar
Posted

Yeah, but they can't be voted off to go to a hotel, they have to be voted into the "new intolerance" house where they are assigned a new food intolerance, but not told what it is.

blueeyedmanda Community Regular
blueeyedmanda
Posted

Hehe, and they should have to learn how to relive their lives and NO CHEATING!!!! :):)

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted

Then there could suddenly be a couple of tribes. The initial Gluten Intolerants, and then the vote-offs form a mystery-intolerant group who gradually, through gastrointestinal trial and error which we get to see every moment of, form the No-Caseins, the Deadly Nightshades, the Stay-Away-From-Soys...

All the while forming alliances. I can see it all now. "Hey, Amber...We're in this together. I'm useless for the next challenge if I eat this muffin. You gotta trade me that fried eggplant. "... :lol:

Viola 1 Rookie
Viola 1
Posted
some of them have to be randomly rubbed with fiberglass insulation so they get the DH effect.

:lol::lol: This thread should be in the Coping with section, there is no better way to Cope than all this laughter :lol:

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
Yeah, but they can't be voted off to go to a hotel, they have to be voted into the "new intolerance" house where they are assigned a new food intolerance, but not told what it is.

Yes! And they're not allowed to leave until they have figured out what that intolerance is :D

Drama-Queen Rookie
Drama-Queen
Posted

If they are college age kids, they should have to go to school and resist the temptation of all the foods around them. And not only that but get up during a final and puke and come back and finish the fiinal. They should have to feel the torture of their friends talking about pizza for half an hour with no respect to them. :P

"I would like to buy a bowel"

Nice. That is going to make my day! Too bad I can't laugh too loud in the U of MN computer Lab. :lol:

Drama-Queen Rookie
Drama-Queen
Posted

Oooh and then they should take tons of relaxants or something so they have no energy during the day. :P

lonewolf Collaborator
lonewolf
Posted
  • Author

Oh, and how about some challenges?

Going for 9 hours without food because nothing was "safe" and then taking some kind of memory or coordination test.

Or - Having 10 minutes to find 7 different public restrooms in the downtown area.

Or - making a loaf of bread without gluten, dairy, eggs or soy and convincing at least one child to eat a whole slice.

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Go to topic listing
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A19):


  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      131,544
    • Most Online (within 30 mins)
      7,748
    Jem68
    Newest Member
    Jem68
    Joined
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A20):

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      121.4k
    • Total Posts
      1m
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A22):



  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A21):


  • Upcoming Events

  • Posts

    • Beverage
      Diagnosed celiac for 1-2 months ago and everything makes me bloated.

      By Beverage · Posted

      I had a very rough month after diagnosis. No exaggeration, lost so much inflammatory weight, I looked like a bag of bones, underneath i had been literally starving to death. I did start feeling noticeably better after a month of very strict control of my kitchen and home. What are you eating for breakfast and lunch? I ignored my doc and ate oats, yes they were gluten free, but some brands are at the higher end of gluten free. Lots of celics can eat Bob's Red Mill gluten-free oats, but not me. I can now eat them, but they have to be grown and processed according to the "purity protocol" methods. I mail order them, Montana Gluten-Free brand. A food and symptoms and activities log can be helpful in tracking down issues. You might be totally aware, but I have to mention about the risk of airborne gluten. As the doc that diagnosed me warned . . Remember eyes, ears, nose, and mouth all lead to your stomach and intestines.  Are you getting any cross contamination? Airborne gluten? Any pets eating gluten (they eat it, lick themselves, you pet them...)? Any house remodeling? We live in an older home, always fixing something. I've gotten glutened from the dust from cutting into plaster walls, possibly also plywood (glues). The suggestions by many here on vitamin supplements also really helped me. I had some lingering allergies and asthma, which are now 99% gone. I was taking Albuterol inhaler every hour just to breathe, but thiamine in form of benfotiamine kicked that down to 1-2 times a day within a few days of starting it. Also, since cutting out inflammatory seed oils (canola, sunflower, grapeseed, etc) and cooking with real olive oil, avocado oil, ghee, and coconut oil, I have noticed even greater improvement overall and haven't used the inhaler in months! It takes time to weed out everything in your life that contains gluten, and it takes awhile to heal and rebuild your health. At first it's mentally exhausting, overwhelming, even obsessive, but it gets better and second nature.
    • Jsingh
      Protein or fat?

      By Jsingh · Posted

      Hi,  I care for my seven year old daughter with Celiac. After watching her for months, I have figured out that she has problem with two kinds of fats- animal fat and cooking oils. It basically makes her intestine sore enough that she feels spasms when she is upset. It only happens on days when she has eaten more fat than her usual every day diet. (Her usual diet has chia seeds, flaxseeds, and avocado/ pumpkin seeds for fat and an occasional chicken breast.) I stopped using cooking oils last year, and when I reintroduced eggs and dairy, both of which I had held off for a few months thinking it was an issue of the protein like some Celiac patients habe mentioned to be the case, she has reacted in the same fashion as she does with excess fats. So now I wonder if her reaction to dairy and eggs is not really because of protein but fat.   I don't really have a question, just wondering if anyone finds this familiar and if it gets better with time.  Thank you. 
    • Chanda Richard
      High Cost of Gluten-Free Foods

      By Chanda Richard · Posted

      Hello, My name is Chanda and you are not the only one that gose through the same things. I have found that what's easiest for me is finding a few meals each week that last. I have such severe reactions to gluten that it shuts my entire body down. I struggle everyday with i can't eat enough it feels like, when I eat more I lose more weight. Make sure that you look at medication, vitamins and shampoo and conditioner also. They have different things that are less expensive at Walmart. 
    • petitojou
      Frequent nausea after gluten-free diet

      By petitojou · Posted

      Thank you so much! I saw some tips around the forum to make a food diary and now that I know that the community also struggles with corn, egg and soy, the puzzle pieces came together! Just yesterday I tried eating eggs and yes, he’s guilty and charged. Those there are my 3 combo nausea troublemakers. I’m going to adjust my diet ☺️ Also thank you for the information about MCAS! I’m from South America and little it’s talked about it in here. It’s honestly such a game changer now for treatment and recovery. I know I’m free from SIBO and Candida since I’ve been tested for it, but I’m still going to make a endoscopy to test for H. Pylori and Eosinophilic esophagitis (EoE). Thank you again!! Have a blessed weekend 🤍
    • knitty kitty
      Unusual bright yellow but odourless discharge

      By knitty kitty · Posted

      Yes, I, too, have osteoporosis from years of malabsorption, too.  Thiamine and magnesium are what keep the calcium in place in the bones.  If one is low in magnesium, boron, selenium, zinc, copper, and other trace minerals, ones bone heath can suffer.  We need more than just calcium and Vitamin D for strong bones.  Riboflavin B 2, Folate B 9 and Pyridoxine B 6 also contribute to bone formation and strength.   Have you had your thyroid checked?  The thyroid is important to bone health as well.  The thyroid uses lots of thiamine, so a poorly functioning thyroid will affect bone heath.  
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

NOTICE: This site places This site places cookies on your device (Cookie settings). on your device. Continued use is acceptance of our Terms of Use, and Privacy Policy.