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I Hate This!


Marie1976

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Marie1976 Enthusiast

Went to the beach for the weekend with my mom and sister who tried to be accommodating and agreed to go to a couple places with me that had vegan, gluten-free food but we ended up at a seafood restaurant at one point, where I could not eat ONE thing on the menu. I had water. And because I was so careful all weekend, I didn't get sick, right? Wrong. I still got sick.

I lost a lot of my hearing in my 20s and am finally used to the fact that I can't go to the movies (unless there are subtitles) and now I apparently can't go out to eat either. Dinner and a movie? Not gonna happen.

It's only been a couple months since I was diagnosed, and I know I need to just hang in there. But seriously, for how long? How many months will it take before I feel better?

I never felt deprived on my vegan diet (which I've been doing for 10+ years) but without gluten, I am feeling very limited. Maybe it's because veganism was my choice, and celiac isn't.

I thought one bright spot would be that I'd lose weight (I need to lose about 15 pounds). But no -- I'm actually GAINING weight. I'm now eating more junk food than I used to, I guess to make up for all the other stuff I can't have: "Well at least I can have potato chips!" And I never used to buy potato chips!

I feel like a jerk for feeling sorry for myself. It's "just" celiac, not cancer or something equally terrible. But I can't help feeling like, "Why me?"


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Jenniferxgfx Contributor

I'm a long time vegan too and new to this gluten-free thing, and I'm having a hard time with it. I went vegan for health and ethical reasons, and the ethics keep me honest, so to speak. Even if I'm willing to risk the reactions to dairy, the ethics involved mean that I won't say "just one sundae! It won't hurt that much" because (here's the point) I apparently care more about the health and safety of animals more than my own.

I know I need to put my own health at the same level as my own, and look at avoiding gluten like it's looking out for my own health the way avoiding eggs and dairy helps the health of chickens and cows. Maybe it's not even that complicated. Maybe I just need to respect that I'm worth the hassle it takes to be gluten-free in a gluten-centric culture.

Ive really had a hard time with this lately, so thanks for sharing.

This thread needs some good quiet gluten free date/activity ideas :)

Kim69 Apprentice

Hi guys. I used to be vegetarian and was a wannabe vegan. It was my choice because I don't like harming animals.

It wasn't long after I was diagnosed Coeliac that I decided that I could not get healthy on a vegetarian diet. Eating out was impossible. Since being diagnosed I have discovered lots of food intolerances that include legumes and many fruits and veggies.

I am seeing a therapist who (amongst other issues) is helping me cope with becoming a meat eater! She tells me to say to myself "I don't like eating this meat. It is not who I am." basically she says you can't rationalize with your consciousness by telling yourself that your health is important etc. Accepting that you don't like eating meat but am doing so anyway is less harmful. I dont know if it makes any sense!

At a restaurant I ask for a gluten-free menu. If there isn't one, I ask what is or could be gluten-free. Inevitably there is never a vegetarian option. Then i have to select an option that has the least amount of problem foods like onion. I have

travelled a lot this year - probably 1 out of 3 days so I get lots of practice. Fish and salad is the easiest but I tire quickly of this option, and crave something filling like rice or noodles. I have even started having the occasional piece of steak lately! It is so filling and otherwise I have filled up on chocolate bars (I have put on weight since going gluten-free).

I am a member of an animal rights group and find eating animal products distressing but I have decided to eat them for my health. Perhaps in the future I will be able to reintroduce vegetarian options back into my diet.

As for dating - thank goodness I don't have to worry about that. However during a recent holiday I was in tears in the restroom because at the 1st restaurant we tried I could only have fish and salad (and pay $30!), the second restaurant was able to give me some chicken and steamed veggies which was ok. My daughter stormed at me that I was making lunch unpleasant and my husband complained that I was 'making' every meal a battle. Hmm.

maximoo Enthusiast

Kim, why can't you have rice?

Judy3 Contributor

Went to the beach for the weekend with my mom and sister who tried to be accommodating and agreed to go to a couple places with me that had vegan, gluten-free food but we ended up at a seafood restaurant at one point, where I could not eat ONE thing on the menu. I had water. And because I was so careful all weekend, I didn't get sick, right? Wrong. I still got sick.

I lost a lot of my hearing in my 20s and am finally used to the fact that I can't go to the movies (unless there are subtitles) and now I apparently can't go out to eat either. Dinner and a movie? Not gonna happen.

It's only been a couple months since I was diagnosed, and I know I need to just hang in there. But seriously, for how long? How many months will it take before I feel better?

I never felt deprived on my vegan diet (which I've been doing for 10+ years) but without gluten, I am feeling very limited. Maybe it's because veganism was my choice, and celiac isn't.

I thought one bright spot would be that I'd lose weight (I need to lose about 15 pounds). But no -- I'm actually GAINING weight. I'm now eating more junk food than I used to, I guess to make up for all the other stuff I can't have: "Well at least I can have potato chips!" And I never used to buy potato chips!

I feel like a jerk for feeling sorry for myself. It's "just" celiac, not cancer or something equally terrible. But I can't help feeling like, "Why me?"

Here is a website that I recently discovered.. Vegetarian/gluten free I am not vegetarian anymore because of the Celiac but I'm visiting my son and family in July for an extended visit and they are and I don't eat meat when I'm there. I found this site looking for vegetarian options for me.. Hope it helps a little. :)

Open Original Shared Link

Marie1976 Enthusiast

Going back to eating meat/eggs/dairy might be the right decision for some people, but I no longer have any desire to eat these things. I just don't look at them as "food" anymore and I'm about as likely to order bacon and eggs as I am to take a bite of my shoe.

I personally don't view vegetarianism as "putting the animals before myself." I'm not going to force myself to eat meat for my health since I don't really believe eating animal products is healthy. I realize that's not the popular opinion, and I don't judge. I think you gotta do what you gotta do to feel better so if you've decided to go back to eating meat, don't beat yourself up over it!

One thing that helped me a little on our vacation was doing some online research before I went. I looked up restaurants in the city I was going to, which ones were gluten free and/or vegan and if they didn't post a menu on their website, I emailed them. I was surprised to get such speedy and detailed answers from a couple of the restaurants that told me which sauces, etc., were gluten free!

I went to Red Brick Pizza Cafe in Ventura, and Rancho's in Ocean Beach (in San Diego). Chipotle is good too. I also brought lots of vegan gluten-free jerky and other snacks, and visited a health food store while I was there. So far my only vacations since going gluten-free have been to Ventura and San Diego so it's been (somewhat) easier to find places to eat than it would be if I'd vacationed somewhere where all they have are steakhouses. Maybe as more people are diagnosed, there will be more options available to us.

Judy: thanks for the link! Looks like there are some yummy recipes on there. And Jennifer, how about picnics for our gluten-free activity list? It's easier to pack our own food anyway! ;)

Marie1976 Enthusiast

FYI:

I know I said I still got sick on vacation. The restaurants I mentioned in my previous post are not the ones that I suspect of "glutening" me!


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Jenniferxgfx Contributor

Heh the shoe analogy made me lol. I agree. I just don't see meat, dairy, or eggs as viable food options. It's possible to be a gluten-free vegan, and theres definitely a small but growing group of "out" gluten-free vegans. I know I've got the privilege of being able to consume pretty much anything that comes from a plant without repercussions. It's just the stupid insidious gluten!

And just an fyi, The xgfx in my name is a new reference to "gluten-free" vegan. I'm not affiliated with the site by the same name (I just like the succint way of describing myself), but it's out there for googling, if you'd like. You're right, it'll get more common, and it's already easier than it was in the past. But it's still frustrating sometimes.

I love the picnic idea! Picnics and kite flying? :)

Skylark Collaborator

When I go on dates I choose the restaurant!

It is frustrating being on a restrictive diet that you didn't choose. I've gotten used to it over the years, and to use that wonderful analogy, I am about as likely to view bread as food as I am to suddenly crave denim. ;)

You have to give yourself a little time and space to grieve. It's normal to feel deprived at first, even if you were half-hoping for the diagnosis because of chronic health problems. You are NOT a jerk for asking "why me?" and you need to forgive yourself for feeling a little self-pity. Obviously wallowing in self-pity will make you feel worse, but it's a natural feeling that can come up from time to time. Celiac is better to have than incurable diseases, but it is still a chronic disease that other folks don't have to cope with.

As for feeling better, a lot of us find we can't tolerate dairy or soy for the first few months. If your GI problems are not improving at all, you may need to go to nuts or beans and rice for your protein to start healing. Neuro problems can take longer to clear up. Since you have some neuro issues, you should have your doctor check your vitamin D, B6, and B12 status. As I'm sure you know, vegans tend to have a diet low in B12, and even celiacs on a more varied diet tend to need B12 supplements. I am not vegetarian and I take a high-potency multivitamin. It's still not enough B12 and D; I have to take quite a bit of them to get to the middle of the normal ranges.

Marie1976 Enthusiast

Thanks, Skylark. I hope it's not the soy, because I eat a lot of tofu! And I get B12 in the form of nutritional yeast, but I forget to use it. I need to start putting it in my smoothies more often. Thanks for the reminder!

Jennifer, I didn't know about the xgfx, thanks for the tip!

Kim, I have an idea for you. Since you feel guilty for going back to meat, maybe you could "make it up" to the animals by helping them in other ways. For example, I used to write letters -- you can go peta.org and click on "action" and then "action alerts" and it will tell you what's going on and who to write/email. Here's the link if you're interested: Open Original Shared Link

Just an idea. ;)

cahill Collaborator

Going back to eating meat/eggs/dairy might be the right decision for some people, but I no longer have any desire to eat these things.

For me it was NOT a matter of " a desire to eat these thing " or an decision to be made.

Pure and simple,, it was a matter of survival. When I was at my sickest, meat was among the VERY few foods my body would tolerate.

That was very difficult for me,having been vegan for most of my adult life.

Honestly as my body heals and I am able to tolerate more foods ,I would like to see my self headed back to eating vegan ,or as close to it as my body will tolerate. But with my food intolerances and dietary restrictions that may be a ways off in to the future, or may not be able to happen all . I can NOT tolerate soy (and gluten of course) in any form, legumes are still iffy most days, I still have trouble tolerating most fruits and vegetables.And even now meat is one of the few foods I can depend on as a safe food

Takala Enthusiast

I don't understand how contacting an organization such as PETA, which is opposed to all domesticated animals is actually a way to "help" animals. Companion animals would not exist at this point without humans being willing to feed and care for them.

If you want to help an animal, actually HELP an animal. That means instead of harassing animal caregivers, you take care of an animal's daily needs, and do not harm it, nor seek to cause it emotional distress, but you do not posture that all domesticated animal care is cruel, evil, or selfish, or a form of abuse, nor do you insist that having companion animals or livestock is evil.

If you don't want to eat a particular item, don't eat it.

Please do not insist that the over 20 assorted animals that live here must all also go vegan ( which is the byproduct of the official PETA philosophy of all humans must go vegan on moral grounds) because for some of them, it's just as big a disaster physically for them as it is for some humans.

Marie1976 Enthusiast

I don't understand how contacting an organization such as PETA, which is opposed to all domesticated animals is actually a way to "help" animals. Companion animals would not exist at this point without humans being willing to feed and care for them.

If you want to help an animal, actually HELP an animal. That means instead of harassing animal caregivers, you take care of an animal's daily needs, and do not harm it, nor seek to cause it emotional distress, but you do not posture that all domesticated animal care is cruel, evil, or selfish, or a form of abuse, nor do you insist that having companion animals or livestock is evil.

If you don't want to eat a particular item, don't eat it.

Please do not insist that the over 20 assorted animals that live here must all also go vegan ( which is the byproduct of the official PETA philosophy of all humans must go vegan on moral grounds) because for some of them, it's just as big a disaster physically for them as it is for some humans.

I'm not sure why you are offended by my suggestion (which was meant for someone else anyway). I'm not insisting that anyone's animals go vegan, what are you talking about? And I don't believe PETA is against having pets either.

I did not advise "contacting PETA" -- I suggested checking their bulletin board for action alerts which are news items that are meant to make us aware of animal abuses (such as animals beaten in the circus or whatever) and if one chooses to do so, he or she can write to the appropriate person and ask (politely) for reform. Animals don't have a voice, so some of us choose to speak out for them.

We can all make a difference in different ways. (And by the way, I contribute to other causes, as well, including organizations that fight human trafficking and child abuse. Not just animal rights.)

Someone on this board said they felt guilty about going back to meat eating, and I merely suggested that we can do other things to help animals other than being vegetarian. Why so defensive?

Poppi Enthusiast

This thread needs some good quiet gluten free date/activity ideas :)

My hubby and I go out for a date night once a week or so and it was always the same. Eat out then go home and go to sleep because I would inevitably feel awful and my husband was overweight and a bit of a binge eater so he would overeat and feel like crap too.

Now we've taken food out of the equation. He has lost 65 pounds and I am healthy and energetic for the first time ever.

We go to the rec centre and swim or soak in the hot tub, play pool at the pool hall, go geocaching, find new placed to watch the sunset from, we are taking a kayaking course next weekend... food isn't the date anymore. It's just fuel to make us feel good so we can do other things together.

Judy3 Contributor

My hubby and I go out for a date night once a week or so and it was always the same. Eat out then go home and go to sleep because I would inevitably feel awful and my husband was overweight and a bit of a binge eater so he would overeat and feel like crap too.

Now we've taken food out of the equation. He has lost 65 pounds and I am healthy and energetic for the first time ever.

We go to the rec centre and swim or soak in the hot tub, play pool at the pool hall, go geocaching, find new placed to watch the sunset from, we are taking a kayaking course next weekend... food isn't the date anymore. It's just fuel to make us feel good so we can do other things together.

I like the way you and your hubby think!!!

sb2178 Enthusiast

Activity/dates:

kayaking

frisbee

hiking

museums

art markets/outdoor antique/street fairs

county fairs and festivals

bike rides

book groups and author talks

religious groups (this is going to depend on your religion/non-religion, so fill in your own blank)

musical events (bands, dancing, orchestra, etc)

parades

walks around the city/a particular scenic route/rails-to-trails/park/arboretum

a class of some sort: wine tasting, glass blowing, a foregin language, dancing, bike repair, etc

game or trivia nights

Want me to think of more?

Anyway, in terms of vegan and gluten-free, you are very restricted compared to the standard american diet. But, as you've noted, the standard american diet kinda bites. it's hard on the human body, totally destructive on the environment, and pretty hard on most of our livestock. However, what it has plenty of is very skilled marketing. Think about it-- aside from this website with all its gluten-free ads, when was that last time you saw an ad on TV, or on a billboard, or in a newspaper for a food that you could eat? You're fighting not only the grocery store shelves themselves, but also all the mind-bending power exerted on the american (??) consumer.

BTW, civileats has a great graphic showing how the American diet has changed over the last 40 years or so. You should check it out. It's grains (a significant portion of which is wheat), sugars, and meat. I did have to start eating meat, prior to my diagnosis, because I hit the point where I was not digesting WHITE RICE. But, I could digest meat and fish, mostly. Weird, but I was losing 3 lbs a week so protein it was. (I'm okay with eating animals, just not with industrial animal production, so I could do it but it was wicked expensive.) One of the exercises I did at one point was to make lists of what I could eat. It really helped to see that long, long list and I think I've diversified my diet somewhat.

I would be concerned if you are having GI issues and adhering to the diet as beans are hard to digest, and nut and soy can also be problematic. I couldn't digest beans very well for about two months, and still have mild issues with peanuts if I get too carried away. Soy's ok though, but I avoided it for the first couple of months since beans weren't going so well. Doesn't leave much for protein... You can do it though. Get good supplements if you aren't already taking them.

Kim69 Apprentice

Kim, why can't you have rice?

Hi maximoo. I love rice and noodles but most restaurants when I travel, don't offer it on their menus.

Marie1976 Enthusiast

Thanks for all the great ideas, everyone! We packed a picnic today and went hiking up in the mountains, it was a beautiful day.

Also I love "find new places to watch the sunset." :)

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