Food Phobia

[Kim UPST NY]

I was wondering if any one eles may have some Phobias which I developed over the years sine I was about 12yrs old I am Afraid of eating Poisonned or bad food Now I only Found out about Celiac A month ago and I am 34 But All my life I would eat and then Feel sick so I would Belive there was something wrong after years of this and Panic attacks I became Bulimic, I am still Sketchy about eating out or being the first person to have a chip if it's an unopened bag. It's an awful Thing to live with and it's worse now Because now I know what is wrong with me now I'm afraid of Gluten Poisoning and Now I am only 89 pounds,(I need to be 110 to be healthy) Ahhh So Does any one have these Issues?

[lemonade]

hey

I have suffered from an Eating Disorder (anorexia), this was about 4 yrs ago, and I am still recovering. I am not struggling like i was in the past, but i am still recovering. I am only 95 pounds and need to be about 105 to be considered healthy, i know how you feel. Being sick and all with Celiac doesnt make life and recovery any easier because once again food is the main issue. I try hard to tell myself that food wont make me sick and it usually works because its common sense. Eat foods that you know taste good and that you enjoy. Eat "Comfort" foods. Its hard, I know, but if you beleive that you will recover and will heal then you will do so.

Lemonade

[ravenwoodglass]

I was wondering if any one eles may have some Phobias which I developed over the years sine I was about 12yrs old I am Afraid of eating Poisonned or bad food Now I only Found out about Celiac A month ago and I am 34 But All my life I would eat and then Feel sick so I would Belive there was something wrong after years of this and Panic attacks I became Bulimic, I am still Sketchy about eating out or being the first person to have a chip if it's an unopened bag. It's an awful Thing to live with and it's worse now Because now I know what is wrong with me now I'm afraid of Gluten Poisoning and Now I am only 89 pounds,(I need to be 110 to be healthy) Ahhh So Does any one have these Issues?

Some of your anxiety may lessen as you heal from the gluten. But boy do I know where your coming from. What helped me was to switch to unprocessed foods. I buy organic chicken, fresh veggies and fruits. Fresh potatoes, plain rice and only McCormick single spice spices. There are also some good gluten free baked goods that come from facilities that only use gluten-free ingredients so that cuts the risk of contamination. I am lucky and live near a Wegmans they label all their gluten free products with an orange G or a G in a circle. They are very reliable and have been a big help. I understand how you feel about eating out, I had too many bad experiences and don't even try anymore. And they were at the best restaurants in town, one a four star! Again once you have healed this paranoia may lessen to a great extent. My DD at one time had a phobia about my poisoning her. This was no short term thing. It went away after she went gluten-free along with her anxiety and PMDD.

[wolfie]

I am recovering from a relapse with anorexia, anxiety issues and just found out that I have a gluten intolerance/Celiac 5 weeks ago. I have managed to gain a couple of pounds back, but it is definitely a struggle. I have been seeing a nutritionist and if it weren't for her, I would never have found out about the gluten issues. It definitely makes things difficult b/c I was trying to get my focus off food and it is now even more on food b/c I have to make sure that I am reading labels. I also have OCD which makes this tough too. I do take Lexapro and that has helped a lot with trying to just relax and eat and work towards putting on the weight. I didn't really have a food phobia in the sense that I thought I would get sick from a certain food, just that certain foods would make me gain weight, which I guess is a phobia. What finally knocked some sense into me was getting the stomach flu and having to go to the ER to get rehydrated b/c I was underweight and not able to rehydrate myself. My dr warned me that I would be in trouble if I got sick and she was right.

Have you tried counseling for your eating disorder? That has been one thing that I have done this time that really seems to be helping.

((HUGS)) I know it is a long, hard road.

[sillyyak]

YES! I have this issue. I was anorexic and bulimic for my teens. Then got better. Now I was jujst diganosed with celiac and have NO interest in food AT ALL. ZERO. ZILCH. I am angry about the celiac and at my doctor who took months to get a diagnosis but seems to want to help me get better. But I was so angry the other day I told him if he dropped me as a patient I would kill myself. I see a therapist etc. But right now food is a struggle. I hate all foods right now. The ones I want to eat make me sick and the ones that I have to eat I could care less about. You are not alone

[tiredofdoctors]

I struggled with annorexia in my late 20's, early 30's. Since having to be gluten-free, I don't necessarily think that those issues have returned, but I think that now, I'm afraid of food. I have reduced my diet almost entirely to smoothies which I make, because I have EXTREME control over what is in them. I have little interest in those, as well. I can now go 2-3 days without eating, because I'm simply not interested in food. My husband has been a great help with this, though. He finds foods which are labeled "gluten-free", shows me the labels, and we eat them together. He does this as many nights as he can, because he knows that I won't usually eat during the day. He also secretly "keeps track" of whether I've eaten, which is good. I am overweight now, trying to lose for my daughter's wedding in August, and he knows of my past history. Because of thyroid and metabolism issues, I have not been able to lose weight. He reminds me of the importance of not throwing my body into "starvation mode", and then I will metabolize little or nothing. I think it is such a fine line, trying to eat healthy, yet being very afraid about the foods which I put in my mouth. My kitchen is gluten-free, and I have given all our former wooden spoons & utensils (pampered chef, too -- it killled me) to my friends. I think that, at some point, all of us must go through this fear. I don't know how long it takes to reduce or eliminate that fear. I think that, eventually, it will diminish. In the meantime, please take care of yourself, and know that you're not alone in your struggle. I will keep you and everyone on this thread in my thoughts and prayers . . . . ((HUGS))Lynne

[Lollie]

Geez....I sound just like all of you! I have been fighting anorexia for 10 years. I was heavy all through my teens, and then I got sick my second year of college. Since I was only Dx about 1.5 months ago, I didn't realize the food really was making me sick! I used to eat and within an hour it was out (D). I would be in such pain in the dorm bathroom, I would just think, "Well, I am losing weight." It made it bearable.

I definantly have a problem worrying about whether or not my food is good. I constantly think I'm going to get food poisoning. I have to ask my husband to taste my food before I will eat it, only when my anxiety is really up. Although, since getting a Dx and going gluten-free, my anxiety level is better. I know now when I have pain, its Celiac, it has a name. I have a weight that if I dip below, I start to worry and eat more. Does anyone else do that? I want to gain a little because for my height, I'm pretty thin.

As far as it goes, I think that the Celiac caused my anorexia and feelings toward food (thinking it will make me sick). I know that Celiac can be the root cause behind depression, anxiety, and some nuerological problems. I'm hoping once I start to get the nutrition I need, maybe the other secondary issues will also clear up.

I'm sad that so many have also been dealing with the same issues as me, but in a way it helps me to know that once again I'm not alone and I'm not crazy after all.

Thanks Kim for bringing this issue up on the board. You are not alone and we all do really care!

-Lollie

[key]

I was anorexic in college. Not severely, because I never quit menstrating, but would go days without eating. I also was always paranoid at restaurants before, because I always thought they made my stomach hurt. I never would eat at buffets. Still won't. I only eat at like one restaurant now and I get a baked potatoe with tea. No one really touches my food this way! IF I am at a group social, I don't like touching everything with everyone else and usually don't eat. This part has gotten worse since going gluten free. I just figure my home is my safe place to eat. I am 31 and skinnier then I have ever been. I am not anorexic now, but think I don't gain weight, because I am vegetarian and I am gluten free. I usually don't eat alot at night, but that is more, because I am afraid of my stomach hurting or feeling gross at bedtime. I am very afraid of being sick. I hate being sick! THis has always been an issue with me, especially since college. My stomach problems seem to have started in high school, so I do wonder if maybe that is when celiac started. I was anemic then. I do know it got much worse after having kids.

I find this frustrating and wonder whether the anorexia caused the celiac or vice versa! It is a very interesting topic though. I feel like a freak, but don't tell other people of all my fears with food. Not even my husband! He did know me when I didn't eat much for years, but I got tons better about 8 years ago when we got married and I definitely eat enough calories now, but I don't seem to gain weight. I am very active though and maybe with the celiac.

I have never eaten meat, but think sometimes I should, but I am afraid of it making me sick. I doubt I will ever be able to add it to my diet.

HOpe you start getting better. If the anxiety is severe, maybe an antidepressant would help for awhile.

Goodluck,

Monica

[penguin]

I was heavy all through my teens, and then I got sick my second year of college. Since I was only Dx about 1.5 months ago, I didn't realize the food really was making me sick! I used to eat and within an hour it was out (D). I would be in such pain in the dorm bathroom, I would just think, "Well, I am losing weight." It made it bearable.

That's me! Second year of college and everything! I don't know how I'm going to deal with not having D all of the time because for so long my thinking was, "well, at least it's making me lose weight". Not healthy.

It also doesn't help when dr's tell you it's all in your head, or that you're too stressed out, or whatever.

Hang in there, you've got a lot of support!

[Lollie]

"It also doesn't help when dr's tell you it's all in your head, or that you're too stressed out, or whatever. "

ChelsE

Yeah, I was really starting to think I was truly crazy. I have told this story before, but if it weren't for my husband, I would still be suffering and probably drugged. He's the one that figured out the gluten, not a Dr.

The dr's never did believe me. But at least my husband did! I feel like for the first time....I have a chance! I don't mind figureing out how to be gluten-free, because over the years I have cut out so much from my diet, what's one more thing. So far so good. I think the hope of being well is enough to keep me going! I hope that everyone who is battleing anorexia and celiac will take the hope of knowing, just hold on to that when your head starts playing tricks on you....you now know what's been making you sick, you haven't been crazy, the food did hurt you, but now you know.

Okay, that's all from me. I just wanted to share how finally having the name of what's been wrecking my insides has really helped me.

-Lollie