The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original

[kareng]

I grabbed my toothbrush and started brushing away. All of a sudden, my mouth was foaming up and it tasted like I was eating soap I rinsed my mouth a million times (it still tastes like soap 3 hours later).

In the car I said,

"Max, did you put soap on my toothbrush?"

Pause

"Uh, soap?? Uh no, no soap..."

Me

"What did you put on my toothbrush? I really need to know what was in my mouth"

pause

"Uhhhhhhh"

Me

"Don't worry, you're not in trouble..."

pause

"You know that stuff I got all over the counter last night..."

Mmmmmm, brushed my teeth with shaving cream this morning

Yummy. Max is washing your mouth out with soap. Did you use any bad words?

Rah-shell--ew-w-w-w-w!!!!!!!!!!! <pukephace>

Well, me son had his surgery this morning, and although it took longer than anticipated he's back home and he did fine. <ultra-relievedphace>

I'm sure you will take good care of him. While he's immobile, smother him.

[jerseyangel]

I'm sure you will take good care of him. While he's immobile, smother him.

He'll be here in two days--I can't wait!

[kareng]

I'm sure you will take good care of him. While he's immobile, smother him.

Wait! That didn't come out right! I meant "smother him with love & attention" not a pillow.

[jerseyangel]

Wait! That didn't come out right! I meant "smother him with love & attention" not a pillow.

I knew what you meant.

[celiac-mommy]

I knew what you meant.

Well depending on the day/time, it could go either way

[elye]

Patteigh! So glad to hear DS is okay.. . . ...... . . is he in a lovely, post-surgical morphine-induced world all his own? And yes -- no smothering. With love, by all means... . . . a pillow, well....no.

Well, I have kept forgetting to tell youse guys that Michelle (SIL waaaaaaaaayyyy up in Tagish, Yukon), for the first time in seven years, is NOT running the Yukon Quest this year. She decided to do The Iditarod, which starts in Willow, Alaska, and ends in Nome. 1,850 km by dogsled - - she hopes to break twelve days, I believe.

Just madness.

It started Sunday afternoon, and so far she is 38th out of 72 mushers. Think she's holdin' back the first few days, and will turn on the jets later. . . . ... . ........GO, MICHELLE!

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[celiac-mommy]

Well, I have kept forgetting to tell youse guys that Michelle (SIL waaaaaaaaayyyy up in Tagish, Yukon), for the first time in seven years, is NOT running the Yukon Quest this year. She decided to do The Iditarod, which starts in Willow, Alaska, and ends in Nome. 1,850 km by dogsled - - she hopes to break twelve days, I believe.

Just madness.

Yes, utter madness, that's AMAZING though! I've never known anyone who's done that before--oh wait, I still don't

Weird mood day

[mushroom]

Skeeter and barley

Patteigh's DS and successful surgery

Patteigh's mothering instincts Patteigh's smothering efforts

Iditarod. OMG, always thought those guys (and gals) were crazy mad insane (check one or all) And the poor doggies There used to be a guy at North Tahoe who could be seen training his team with a sled on wheels on the back roads in summer around the lake The dogs were gorgeous!

Our big flower show (our version of Chelsea) starts today, so of course our georgeous summer weather has gone north and we have a foul wind blowing in off the sea, with something mean and nasty on its way from Australia which produced lemon-sized hailstones on Melbourne. Mr Murphy hard at work again.

[nikki-uk]

BAH!!!

Lost all me quotes *head hits keyboard*

...so, it's mainly....

He'll be here in two days--I can't wait!

SO pleased all went well for him Pads!!... you're gonna spoil him ROTTEN!!

<SNOOORT> @ Max

Hey, at least he didn't clean the toilet bowl wiv yer toophbrush....... did he??

(S)Mothering!!

Oh the lists!!! <nodding head>.... sometimes I wish I had a *job* so I could get some time off!

Hi Psills,....bye Psills!!!

[kareng]

Well, I have kept forgetting to tell youse guys that Michelle (SIL waaaaaaaaayyyy up in Tagish, Yukon), for the first time in seven years, is NOT running the Yukon Quest this year. She decided to do The Iditarod, which starts in Willow, Alaska, and ends in Nome. 1,850 km by dogsled - - she hopes to break twelve days, I believe.

Just madness.

It started Sunday afternoon, and so far she is 38th out of 72 mushers. Think she's holdin' back the first few days, and will turn on the jets later. . . . ... . ........GO, MICHELLE!

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Thats great. Love the doggies. They always seem to be having fun.

Our big flower show (our version of Chelsea) starts today, so of course our georgeous summer weather has gone north and we have a foul wind blowing in off the sea, with something mean and nasty on its way from Australia which produced lemon-sized hailstones on Melbourne. Mr Murphy hard at work again.

Flowers sound lovely. We finally got rid of the snow piles on the north side of the house.

[Jestgar]

Flowers sound lovely. We finally got rid of the snow piles on the north side of the house.

We went from 60 degrees to snow flurries in one day.

[kareng]

We went from 60 degrees to snow flurries in one day.

I see your "60 to snow flurries" & raise you - 70 degrees to a Blizzard, in 2 hours, that was so bad that they strung up ropes between college buildings so we didn't get lost in the snow.

Just saw people playing poker on TV.

[celiac-mommy]

We went from 60 degrees to snow flurries in one day.

I was gonna say, "Oh my gosh, us too!" But since we live in the same side of the same state, it sounds a little stupid

[Jestgar]

I was gonna say, "Oh my gosh, us too!" But since we live in the same side of the same state, it sounds a little stupid

:lol: :lol:

[mushroom]

Good morning, Psillies. See, I beat Nik and Em to the punch, though it's still late evening here. What am I doing up? Well just retiring. I have been researching property titles and I am befuzzled and confoozled and wired Doing this for Miss Mary who was admitted to convalescent care for rehydration and leg ulcers today and who is phinally admitting she needs help

Anyways, thought I would start your day off with a laff:

Four dudes who had been high school chums decided to mark turning 40 by going out for a meal. After much discussion, they decided to go to Mario's because the waitresses wore low-cut blouses and had nice breasts.

At 50, they discussed another celebration, and decided to go to Mario's because the food was good, also the wine selection.

A decade later, at 60, they again discussed the matter and again decided on Mario's, as they had a gluten-free menu.

At 70, there was again discussion on where to go, and they decided on Mario's, this time because of the pleasant surroundings, where they could eat in peace.

At 80, they had much discussion on the venue, and decided on Mario's as it had wheelchair access and an elevator.

Another decade passed, and their number was reduced to three, they were turning 90, and they reckoned they should celebrate that there were still three of them around. They discussed and discussed the matter, and eventually decided to go to Mario's, as they hadn't been there before.

HAVE A GREAT DAY!

[curlyfries]

Here's a question to ponder:

Last nite, Hub scrubbed the grill since we haven't used it since I've been gluten-free. He said no Gluten could still be on there. He wondered what a Gluten would look like. I thought round lite blue with little spikes all round & a smile on its wee face. He thought it would look like Java the Hut from Star Wars. What do you think a Gluten looks like?

I got nuttin, but I'm surprised nobody else had a good answer.

They discussed and discussed the matter, and eventually decided to go to Mario's, as they hadn't been there before.

[Jestgar]

forgot about the question!

I think gluten looks like a semi-solid wisp of dark smoke that can suddenly have long sharp curved claws.

[elye]

Mornin', Psills!

Kherrrighne, I phorgot all about your what-does-a-gluten look like.. . . ...! But I have just the person to ask. The Ripper will have a very animated response .. . . ..

Hey, hey! Michelle has moved up to 25th place, and hasn't dropped any dogs yet. Go, girl, go! And in case anyone has missed the biggest fanfare news about this colossal race, the competitor who has won everyone's hearts and is reaching cult-figure status. . .. ....

We gotta be rootin' fer Newton:

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[kareng]

Anyways, thought I would start your day off with a laff:

Another decade passed, and their number was reduced to three, they were turning 90, and they reckoned they should celebrate that there were still three of them around. They discussed and discussed the matter, and eventually decided to go to Mario's, as they hadn't been there before.

Mornin', Psills!

Kherrrighne, I phorgot all about your what-does-a-gluten look like.. . . ...! But I have just the person to ask. The Ripper will have a very animated response .. . . ..

Who is the wise and reverred Ripper? Please ask him/her for insight.

Hey, hey! Michelle has moved up to 25th place, and hasn't dropped any dogs yet. Go, girl, go! And in case anyone has missed the biggest fanfare news about this colossal race, the competitor who has won everyone's hearts and is reaching cult-figure status. . .. ....

We gotta be rootin' fer Newton:

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[kareng]

Am going on a journey tomorrow to the mountains of Lake Tahoe. Whilst atop the mountain, shall seek psilly enlightenment (then, hopefully, not fall off the ski slope on the way down). Will either loose a few pounds as I can't eat at the ski resorts or will gain a bunch as I can eat Snickers, M&Ms, etc.

[Mtndog]

We gotta be rootin' fer Newton:

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That is SO cool! Go Michelle! Go Newton!

Am going on a journey tomorrow to the mountains of Lake Tahoe. Whilst atop the mountain, shall seek psilly enlightenment (then, hopefully, not fall off the ski slope on the way down). Will either loose a few pounds as I can't eat at the ski resorts or will gain a bunch as I can eat Snickers, M&Ms, etc.

Oh fun, fun, fun! I miss Tahoe. My favorite was Alpine Meadows but it's all so beautiful.

Just pooping in to say UGH! Well, really to say hi. I called my doc Monday and the nurse said this current version of stomach flu is turning even WOMEN into whimpering man phlugue victims. My tummy has settled finally but after 5 days of not eating, I am pretty exhausted. Yet, can't sleep.

OK- enough whining like a man phlugue man. Please send buffalo furry tiger pig blanket, Mr Knightley and Mr Darcy (one for each side) and Apolo Ohno to wait on me.

Am bored (ironically, I make the WORST sick person- I get so bored).Contemplating a makeover. Hair getting very long and new hairs are coming in grey (*GASP*) but curly which I like. Currently taking suggestions. Feeling frumpy in me forties- want new clothes, shoes and hairdo. Advice por favor?

[kareng]

Just pooping in to say UGH! Well, really to say hi. I called my doc Monday and the nurse said this current version of stomach flu is turning even WOMEN into whimpering man phlugue victims. My tummy has settled finally but after 5 days of not eating, I am pretty exhausted. Yet, can't sleep.

OK- enough whining like a man phlugue man. Please send buffalo furry tiger pig blanket, Mr Knightley and Mr Darcy (one for each side) and Apolo Ohno to wait on me.

Am bored (ironically, I make the WORST sick person- I get so bored).Contemplating a makeover. Hair getting very long and new hairs are coming in grey (*GASP*) but curly which I like. Currently taking suggestions. Feeling frumpy in me forties- want new clothes, shoes and hairdo. Advice por favor?

Happy to see you drag your poor disease ridden body out of your sick bed. Contemplating a make-over means you must be feeling better.

Will tell "the Meadows" you said hello.

[Mtndog]

I'm so bored I went back and read what I didn't read via gmail these last few days!

OMG if you've never seena 70 year old ladt using avibrator on her nose you haven't seen funny!!!

OK- I confess I read this before but had to go back and read it again because Jess :lol: If I come yer way this summer, will you make me those margaritas? We're aiming for Seattle and then a week on the Olympic Peninsula car camping cause we wanna see yer Hoh

Limonceloo? I want this!! Whatever in hell it is!

And I do NOT think that I want a herminalture vibrature.. .. . .. .....do I even wanna see what one looks like?... . ...... .. . ....

Limoncello is SO good. It's alcohol (methinks grain) that has been infused by lemons and sugar. I have some in my freezer right now! I had one glass the night we decorated the Christmas tree and that was plenty. SO tasty.

My son's team made it to the First Robotics finals & got 2nd place! (57 teams) I was so proud as he has done most of the designing & building of the mechanicals for the last 3 years.

Karrenn- That's so great! Congratulations to him!

What do you think a Gluten looks like?

I always pictured it as BRIGHT BRIGHT green with evil eyes, no mouth.

Believe it or not psills, but THE one year anniversary is almost here.

That is a LOT of difficult memories. I remember Susan telling us about Brian and I couldn't even fathom it. At all. The good news is- one year later, Nathan's OK and Brian is even funnier. Glad the dancing is cheering you :D Can you tango? I've always wanted to learn- so sexy and dramatic!

I have finally reached a point in my dancing where I can keep up with the better dancers ( we're talking about guys here), and sometimes it's like being caught in a whirlwind! They've figured out that I'm easy to spin! And.....the better dancers like to dip

Dancing with the Stars? Methinks our Leesargh is a candidate!

Yes, I am fluent in 'drunk Jess'

Me too- it's all these posts of fauxnetick spelling

Well, me son had his surgery this morning, and although it took longer than anticipated he's back home and he did fine. <ultra-relievedphace>

So glad to hear this Patti- must be hard to be away from your sons when they have stuff going on like this. When will he arrive in TexASS? You'll be happy to smother him!

[Jestgar]

OK- I confess I read this before but had to go back and read it again because Jess :lol: If I come yer way this summer, will you make me those margaritas? We're aiming for Seattle and then a week on the Olympic Peninsula car camping cause we wanna see yer Hoh

:lol:

We can sit on my deck and I'll bring you guys drinks until your lips are numb. I'll even invite Laura and her mom and her vibrator. :lol:

And yes, we got us de best Hoh around.

[elye]

Bevel! Glad to hear you're you're up and about. . . ..... ...Thank GAWD I dinna catch this thang that whipped through our city recently -- knockin' everybody off their feet, some for a week. . . ....

Feeling frumpy in me forties- want new clothes, shoes and hairdo.

Gah! Me, too! Bevel, let's enter each other in What Not to Wear. Man, could Stacey and Clinton ever have a field day with ME. I believe that it would have to be a two-parter.... .. . . . ..

I always pictured it as BRIGHT BRIGHT green with evil eyes, no mouth.

Gluten....gluten.. . . . . ......

I think it looks like this:

We can sit on my deck and I'll bring you guys drinks until your lips are numb. I'll even invite Laura and her mom and her vibrator.

And yes, we got us de best Hoh around.

Well.. . . . .. . . .....Ho's and vibrators and a big deck .. . . ... .. ....I may wanna show up, too. . . . ...