The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original

[psawyer]

There has been so much sadness and anger here of late.

Our nephew sent us a couple of phunnies that I want to share.

Missing Husband

Rick was in trouble -- He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told him, 'Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in less than 6 seconds AND IT HAD BETTER BE THERE!!' The next morning, Rick got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused and curious, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, and brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new....BATHROOM SCALE. Rick has been missing since Friday.

Please pray for him.

And, he also sent us:

THIS IS QUITE REMARKABLE, PLEASE DON'T CHEAT!

In the middle of the table is a round food tray with five kinds of Fruits on it. They are:

A. Apple

B. Banana

C. Strawberry

D. Peach

E. Orange

Which fruit will you choose? Please think VERY carefully and don't rush into it. This is great, I was astounded! Your choice reveals a lot about you!

Test results: Please SCROLL DOWN

If you have chosen:

A. Apple: That means you are a person who loves to eat apples

B. Banana: That means you are a person who loves to eat bananas

C. Strawberry: That means you are a person who loves to eat strawberries

D. Peach: That means you are a person who loves to eat peaches

E. Orange: That means you are a person who loves to eat oranges

Sarah, if you're reading, I'm thinking about you constantly.

[Darn210]

Typo-shmypo Allen does NOT want a neutering!!!!!!

GAHHHHH!!!!!!!! Well, the edit window is still open . . . I could go fix it . . . but it's phunnier this way.

[blueeyedmanda]

Sorry 'bout the kitty, Amanda . . . how old is Lucky?

Lucky just turned 3. He is such a loyal kitty....I am getting teared up thinking of him. I am in "the home office" currently....yes and typing on the computer. I do it all the time, this is how I disconnected from the Tv's phones and the hubby for a bit. I am fully clothed though

Landen is here tonight, boy was he clingy tonight. Didn't want to sit in the cart at Wegmans, he wanted me to hold him, didn't want me walking out of the room...anyway he is sleeping in his new crib. We got one of the cribs from my mom's and now he has his own crib in our spare bedroom...or as we refer to it now, Landen's room.

Jen, Landens mom put an offer on a townhouse today. So I am hoping she makes out well there.

Hi Alex!!! I missed you

Hi all other sillies...I cannot wait to meet Allen, he sounds so much fun. I told him if I come tomorrow we could put the Little Tikes 8 in 1 playground together so he would have some slides to go on. Since mom didnt have any kids yet this year old enough and Silvia is too small, our climbers have been put away....time to break em out!

[Darn210]

A. Apple: That means you are a person who loves to eat apples

B. Banana: That means you are a person who loves to eat bananas

C. Strawberry: That means you are a person who loves to eat strawberries

D. Peach: That means you are a person who loves to eat peaches

E. Orange: That means you are a person who loves to eat oranges

Peter!! I totally fell for it . . . made sure I didn't peek before I made my selection . . . . . . I'm "C" by the way.

[Green12]

Speaking of youth-in-asia, the other day the Olympics announcer says "the Chinese women" while the tv shows those teensy barely-teen gymnasts!!! :facemakingsnortofdisbelief:

16 is the minimum age now but one seems to be 13 & another 15 - according to, until very recently, China's own official athletics websites!!!

Those Chinese gymnast look very young , It's hard to believe all but maybe one are over 16.

Hi all other sillies...I cannot wait to meet Allen, he sounds so much fun. I told him if I come tomorrow we could put the Little Tikes 8 in 1 playground together so he would have some slides to go on. Since mom didnt have any kids yet this year old enough and Silvia is too small, our climbers have been put away....time to break em out!

Sorry about Lucky Amanda

That's wonderful news about your parent's new foster child, he sounds like a real cutie!

Hi Alex!! I hope you are well

Great Sillies Peter! I totally fell for the fruit one too. I was really torn between the peach and the banana, but I guess it doesn't matter anyway

Judy dear, yep I have those books on my Good Reads, just go to my books page and check them out. The series in order is Little Altars Everywhere, Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood, and Ya-Yas In Bloom, all by Rebecca Wells.

I just finished Little Altars tonight. Gotta go to the library and get me Divine Secrets this weekend!

Sillies, I am sad swimming will be over soon Lots of track and field coming up I guess.....and what else?

[blueeyedmanda]

I have to say I really like the winter games better than the summer. I enjoy watching the Skiing, but I love the luge and the bobsled events.

You know tonight I noticed a sign of summer ending.....the sun has been going down sooner....My house was darker when Landen was heading to bed tonight, usually I have to close all shades when I am putting him down. Plus the last few nights have been chillier!

[Judyin Philly]

Hi My Silly Buddies

I'm so glad to see and hear from you all

Esp. our Alex.........happy to see you on line.

Just don't have any funny in me bones tonight...

Hope and pray Sarah is doing ok

Amanda.......sorry about your Lucky but good news about Allen. How is you foot doing

Peter......thanks for the attemp at making our nite a little brigher........

think I'll call it a nite.

thanks for being there for each other today.

Tomorrow is another day and maybe it will be a better one

we can hope.

Judy

EDIT-----i see Sarah........please post Sarah if you feel your up to itWe'd love to hear from you

Can you feel the love and strength coming from all of us?

We care so much about you and your precious boys.

Judy

[Ridgewalker]

Hi Judy... I'm completely and utterly exhausted... just wanted to skim through here... but I did just send an email update, hopefully everybody got it. My brain's not functioning well....

[Judyin Philly]

pLEASE...........don't worry about us.

your short post here let's all know your alive....

I did just rec your email and know there was so much exhaustion just typing it all out

Please stick by your guns .........and gut.........

we love you Sarah.

I pray you can get some sleep tonight

at least you have a week to get your thoughts together.

nite

Judy

[elye]

Thank you SOOOO much for that email update, Sarah. You are amazing to be thinking about keeping us posted when you are going through all this! But it's true, we all worry and wonder constantly about you, and wait for each update.

Our Hugs and prayers continue!

[blueeyedmanda]

Hi Everyone

Was at the vet this morning with Lucky, we have to await bloodwork results. I wont be around today. I am going to see my new little bro, Allen. He talks to me on the phone and sounds adorable

So I am leaving soon and will check if later tonight if I come back home this evening.

Have a good day sillies!

[Jestgar]

Have fun 'manda! Bring back a new avatar!

[Jestgar]

So mods, how did this whole 'Scott reminding us to be polite' thing come about?

I'm assuming that neither he, nor you all constantly monitor all the threads, so does that mean someone had to actually waste their day looking for posts that they could call offensive just so they could run to dad and say "he's being mean to me!!"?

Are there really people who have lost site of the fact that this is a computer, and not real life? I just can't believe that's the case.

[Mtndog]

ALEX- It was so good to "see" you- COME BACK- we miss you! I'll take you to the Cape

There has been so much sadness and anger here of late.

Our nephew sent us a couple of phunnies that I want to share.

Missing Husband

Rick was in trouble -- Rick has been missing since Friday.

Please pray for him.

And, he also sent us:

THIS IS QUITE REMARKABLE, PLEASE DON'T CHEAT!

In the middle of the table is a round food tray with five kinds of Fruits on it. They are:

Sarah, if you're reading, I'm thinking about you constantly.

Pieter- I am constantly looking for Rick :lol:

I can't believe how revealing that test was - I NEVER knew I was a person who liked strawberries

Hi Judy... I'm completely and utterly exhausted... just wanted to skim through here... but I did just send an email update, hopefully everybody got it. My brain's not functioning well....

It's just nice to see you- we love you.. :wub: :wub:

OK- in regards to the sadness and anger here, I have a few quotes for you (feeling feisty today):

"Be kind, everyone you meet knows you're better looking" (somebody)

"I've been there; I hope you have to go there too" (Patti)

"Families are a bond you share that is , unfortunately, unbreakable"(Amanda)

Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence.

- Ashleigh Brilliant

The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech.

- George Bernard Shaw

If you ever become a mother, can I have one of the puppies?

- Charles Pierce

A modest little person, with much to be modest about.

- Winston Churchill

He is a self-made man and worships his creator.

- Irvin S. Cobb

THIS ONE IS FOR ME:

He loves nature in spite of what it did to him.

- Forrest Tucker :lol:

[Mtndog]

So mods, how did this whole 'Scott reminding us to be polite' thing come about?

I'm assuming that neither he, nor you all constantly monitor all the threads, so does that mean someone had to actually waste their day looking for posts that they could call offensive just so they could run to dad and say "he's being mean to me!!"?

Are there really people who have lost site of the fact that this is a computer, and not real life? I just can't believe that's the case.

I am not a mod any longer, but yes, I believe it may have been the case. Although I appreciate Scott's reminder to be nice, I think it should have been spread to some others on the board as well. I told him that.

But, let us remain phunny- I can't take anymore drama that is not "Real". We have enough with all the REAL LIFE stuff going on with the members of this thread.

[Jestgar]

I am not a mod any longer, but yes, I believe it may have been the case.

Curious.

It's my opinion that if you offend someone who's opinion you value, you seek that person out and make amends. If you feel that the impetus was only to add unpleasantness to the world, then ignore it. Why should you concern yourself with someone who only values unhappiness?

And I have one more quote to add

"Maybe her purpose in life is to make you look good." (Jane)

[Jestgar]

And I have to add, that everytime my post leads to a new page, I feel a little pang of regret that it didn't make me royalty :lol:

[Darn210]

Dang . . . I'm tired. Told the kids to sleep in today. They have to get up at 7:00 on school days (oh, by the way, school started last week). So this morning they slept in . . . until 7:07. I don't think they get it . . . and normally they seem like such bright kids.

Jess . . . when is your surgery?? Is it Monday?? How long do you have to stay in the hospital?

Also just wanted to check . . .who here (besides me) hasn't been a monarch?

[elye]

And I have to add, that everytime my post leads to a new page, I feel a little pang of regret that it didn't make me royalty

Jess, I believe you were Queen at around the 400-page flipover, er thereabouts.

Just like a graduating year or degree letters, from now on those of us who have held monarch position should designate such as part of their signature - - everywhere. On your Visa slips, on cheques, letters to the school.....This sort of thing needs to be recognised.

Elye p1000-1100

Dang . . . I'm tired. Told the kids to sleep in today. They have to get up at 7:00 on school days (oh, by the way, school started last week). So this morning they slept in . . . until 7:07. I don't think they get it . . . and normally they seem like such bright kids.

I hate this......but at least my kids are a little older and usually sleep past 7:30, anyways....

Jack gets home from camp tonight!!! He emailed me a couple of photos this past week, playing volleyball and flipping over in a kayak..........ah, to be young again.......

Jess! your surgery is Monday morning, is it not? Are you the type that must ceremoniously say farewell to her uterus? Write a letter to it, have some final verses read?

I do believe my aunt did something like this............someone I do not see that much.......

[Green12]

Dang . . . I'm tired. Told the kids to sleep in today. They have to get up at 7:00 on school days (oh, by the way, school started last week). So this morning they slept in . . . until 7:07. I don't think they get it . . . and normally they seem like such bright kids.

Jess . . . when is your surgery?? Is it Monday?? How long do you have to stay in the hospital?

I was just thinking the exact same thing Janet............and Bevy, when do you get the PICC??

Jess, I believe you were Queen at around the 400-page flipover, er thereabouts.

Just like a graduating year or degree letters, from now on those of us who have held monarch position should designate such as part of their signature - - everywhere. On your Visa slips, on cheques, letters to the school.....This sort of thing needs to be recognised.

Elye p1000-1100

Don't forget the "HRH".......HRH Elye p1000-11000

Jess! your surgery is Monday morning, is it not? Are you the type that must ceremoniously say farewell to her uterus? Write a letter to it, have some final verses read?

What a splendid idea!! We We must do something special in Sillyville this weekend, a Bon Voyage party for Jess's uterus or sumfin

[Darn210]

What a splendid idea!! We We must do something special in Sillyville this weekend, a Bon Voyage party for Jess's uterus or sumfin

Yeah, one of you rhymie types should throw sumptin together . . . Ode to a Uterus.

[Jestgar]

What a splendid idea!! We We must do something special in Sillyville this weekend, a Bon Voyage party for Jess's uterus or sumfin

:lol:

At this point I'm wishing I had sent her on her way much much sooner. I'm more inclined to opt for 'I have my life back' party. When I don't have to plan all my daily tasks around how many tampons fit into my purse, and how close I'll have to be to a bathroom. Probably similar to all you gastro-gluten people....

I think Bev does hers Wednesday. Honey, I'll do a couple extra shots of pain-killer in your honor Wednesday morning

[Darn210]

NICKERLER's BACK!!!!!!

Welcome back Nikki!!!! Don't expect to hear from you for quite some time . . . you're WWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY behind!!!

[nikki-uk]

Psillies!!!!!

Turkısh poop ın!!!!!!!!!!!

Hope all me peeps are ok.

GADS ıts hot!!

Havıng a phab tıme -- burnt to a crısp

Tryıng to work thıs strange laptop ....pool partytonıght @ 10pm

[nikki-uk]

Psillies!!!!!

Turkısh poop ın!!!!!!!!!!!

Hope all me peeps are ok.

GADS ıts hot!!

Havıng a phab tıme -- burnt to a crısp

Tryıng to work thıs strange laptop ....pool partytonıght @ 10pm