Jump to content
  • Welcome to Celiac.com!

    You have found your celiac tribe! Join us and ask questions in our forum, share your story, and connect with others.


  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A1):
    Celiac.com Sponsor (A1-M):
  • Get Celiac.com Updates:
    Support Our Content
    eNewsletter
    Donate

Ode To Celiac


NoGlutenCooties

Recommended Posts

NoGlutenCooties Contributor

Ode to Celiac

(To the cadence of The Adam’s Family theme song)

 

Constant aches cramps and swelling

Constipation pain and bloating

What’s with the rash and itching?

All I want to do is yak.

 

Losing weight and never feel full

Losing hair by the handful

Can’t think straight and my mind’s dull

What the hell is Celiac?

 

The doctors are so clueless

They tell me to complain less

I feel so very helpless

I may have Celiac

 

Stopped eating grains and gravy

Stay away from booze and coffee

I still can’t handle dairy

I hate this Celiac

 

Finally liking what I’m eating

Gaining weight and finally sleeping

They tell me now I’m healing

I’ll survive this Celiac


Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):



Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):



KCG91 Enthusiast

Brilliant! (and *ping* another piece of the puzzle falls into place - hair loss)

IrishHeart Veteran

happy-clap.gif

 

whoo whoo! Bravissimo!!

 

 

(also to the tune of Addams Family)

 

Soon, you will feel awesome.

Your health will start to blossom.

Our lot in life's not rotten

To be a Celiac.

 

Your itchies,  fog, and foul poo

and quick runs to the loo-oo..

are almost far behind you.

It's life with Celiac.

 

So stay the course, dear Cootie.

Chin up!  good  attitude-y !

You're rockin awesome doodies!.

You're slayin' Celiac.

 

^_^

NoGlutenCooties Contributor

Irish - I love it!!  :D

IrishHeart Veteran

Irish - I love it!!  :D

;)  keep up the good work.  Cheers!

1desperateladysaved Proficient

No glutencookies I really like the last verse!  Keep on singing.

 

D

moosemalibu Collaborator

This was so awesome! I love it!


Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):



Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):



eers03 Explorer

Oh my gosh!  I love you all, seriously!

Gemini Experienced

My......we have some real talent here!  Excellent!   :)

GF Lover Rising Star

Sheesh....I'll have that tune stuck in my head for a week now  :lol:

 

Very entertaining Ladies.  Thank You  :D

 

Colleen

cherries Newbie

Lol love it.

surviormom Rookie

Another LOVE it.

IrishHeart Veteran

Sheesh....I'll have that tune stuck in my head for a week now  :lol:

 

 

.....tell me about it....new stanzas playin' in my head at 2 am.... :lol: oy

nvsmom Community Regular

:D  :lol:  Awesome!

notme Experienced

y'all are nuts :)  but:  what talent!

 

i can't believe you may have topped to poop thread - certainly you are Topping the Charts  :D

Brilliant! (and *ping* another piece of the puzzle falls into place - hair loss)

 

you should see my hair, now, katie - compared to what it was (very, very thin hair, itchy scalp and i was basically pulling out what wasn't falling out)  it's now getting an 'underlayer' and is looking and feeling fuller.   hardly any in the shower drain and i'm not pulling a wookie out of my hairbrush every day :)  also, i'm diving into the dye bottle only half as much (very very much less gray - hey.  i'm old lolz)  i used to have to color it every 4-5 weeks and now i can do 2 months, easy.  happy, happy, happy!  ^_^

livinthelife Apprentice

You all are making me see some humor in an otherwise crummy "can't find anything to eat" day!! SO THANKFUL!!!

NoGlutenCooties Contributor

You all are making me see some humor in an otherwise crummy "can't find anything to eat" day!! SO THANKFUL!!!

 

:D   Excellent!  Mission accomplished!!

MGR Apprentice

Fabulous! Never loose our sense of humour!!

NoGlutenCooties Contributor

It's been 10 weeks of gluten free

My poo has finally sunk for me

I'm feelin' so very healthy

Take that you Celiac!

w8in4dave Community Regular

They are all wonderful!! But man when you list symptoms them like that! We do have to keep our sense of humor! I like the Loo loo lol thats funny!! That will be my new thing when I use the rest room it will be "excuse me I have to use the loo loo" :) 

IrishHeart Veteran

It's been 10 weeks of gluten free

My poo has finally sunk for me

I'm feelin' so very healthy

Take that you Celiac!

 

 

We sing about our poo luck

Most peeps would think we're odd ducks 

For cheering each new "don't suck"...

The C D  family.

 

;)

gatita Enthusiast

This is off the hook... love it!

gatita Enthusiast

This reminds me I've had this song stuck in my head for a year... it's to the tune of "I feel pretty" from West Side Story.

 

It's "I been glutened, oh so glutened..." but it's never gone any further.

IrishHeart Veteran

 "I been glutened, oh so glutened..."

 

"I feel bloated and barfy and dull....."

 

okay, knock it off, troublemaker ! :lol:

 

You know I just I can't help myself if given an opening...

gatita Enthusiast

"I feel bloated and barfy and dull....."

 

okay, knock it off, troublemaker ! :lol:

 

You know I just I can't help myself if given an opening...

 

LMAO :P

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Get Celiac.com Updates:
    Support Celiac.com:
    Join eNewsletter
    Donate

  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A17):
    Celiac.com Sponsor (A17):





    Celiac.com Sponsors (A17-M):




  • Recent Activity

    1. - trents replied to Matthias's topic in Coping with Celiac Disease
      1

      Unexpected gluten exposure risk from cultivated mushrooms

    2. - Matthias posted a topic in Coping with Celiac Disease
      1

      Unexpected gluten exposure risk from cultivated mushrooms

    3. - trents replied to catnapt's topic in Celiac Disease Pre-Diagnosis, Testing & Symptoms
      9

      how much gluten do I need to eat before blood tests?

    4. - Scott Adams replied to SilkieFairy's topic in Celiac Disease Pre-Diagnosis, Testing & Symptoms
      2

      IBS-D vs Celiac

    5. - Scott Adams replied to Amy Barnett's topic in Gluten-Free Foods, Products, Shopping & Medications
      1

      Question

  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A19):
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      133,324
    • Most Online (within 30 mins)
      7,748

    mao5617
    Newest Member
    mao5617
    Joined
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A20):
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A22):
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      121.6k
    • Total Posts
      1m
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A21):
  • Who's Online (See full list)

    • There are no registered users currently online
  • Upcoming Events

  • Posts

    • trents
      Welcome to the celiac.com communiuty, @Matthias! Yes, we have been aware that this can be an issue with mushrooms but as long as they are rinsed thoroughly it should not be a problem since the mushrooms don't actually incorporate the gluten into their cellular structure. For the same reason, one needs to be careful when buying aged cheeses and products containing yeast because of the fact that they are sometimes cultured on gluten-containing substrate.
    • Matthias
      The one kind of food I had been buying and eating without any worry for hidden gluten were unprocessed veggies. Well, yesterday I discovered yet another pitfall: cultivated mushrooms. I tried some new ones, Shimeji to be precise (used in many asian soup and rice dishes). Later, at home, I was taking a closer look at the product: the mushrooms were growing from a visible layer of shredded cereals that had not been removed. After a quick web research I learned that these mushrooms are commonly cultivated on a cereal-based medium like wheat bran. I hope that info his helpful to someone.
    • trents
      I might suggest you consider buckwheat groats. https://www.amazon.com/Anthonys-Organic-Hulled-Buckwheat-Groats/dp/B0D15QDVW7/ref=sr_1_4_pp?crid=GOFG11A8ZUMU&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.bk-hCrXgLpHqKS8QJnfKJLKbKzm2BS9tIFv3P9HjJ5swL1-02C3V819UZ845_kAwnxTUM8Qa69hKl0DfHAucO827k_rh7ZclIOPtAA9KjvEEYtaeUV06FJQyCoi5dwcfXRt8dx3cJ6ctEn2VIPaaFd0nOye2TkASgSRtdtKgvXEEXknFVYURBjXen1Nc7EtAlJyJbU8EhB89ElCGFPRavEQkTFHv9V2Zh1EMAPRno7UajBpLCQ-1JfC5jKUyzfgsf7jN5L6yfZSgjhnwEbg6KKwWrKeghga8W_CAhEEw9N0.eDBrhYWsjgEFud6ZE03iun0-AEaGfNS1q4ILLjZz7Fs&dib_tag=se&keywords=buckwheat%2Bgroats&qid=1769980587&s=grocery&sprefix=buchwheat%2Bgroats%2Cgrocery%2C249&sr=1-4&th=1 Takes about 10 minutes to cook. Incidentally, I don't like quinoa either. Reminds me and smells to me like wet grass seed. When its not washed before cooking it makes me ill because of saponins in the seed coat. Yes, it can be difficult to get much dietary calcium without dairy. But in many cases, it's not the amount of calcium in the diet that is the problem but the poor uptake of it. And too much calcium supplementation can interfere with the absorption of vitamins and minerals in general because it raises gut pH.
    • Scott Adams
      What you’re describing really does not read like typical IBS-D. The dramatic, rapid normalization of stool frequency and form after removing wheat, along with improved tolerance of legumes and plant foods, is a classic pattern seen in gluten-driven disease rather than functional IBS. IBS usually worsens with fiber and beans, not improves. The fact that you carry HLA-DQ2.2 means celiac disease is absolutely possible, even if it’s less common than DQ2.5, and many people with DQ2.2 present later and are under-diagnosed. Your hesitation to reintroduce gluten is completely understandable — quality of life matters — and many people in your position choose to remain strictly gluten-free and treat it as medically necessary even without formal biopsy confirmation. If and when you’re ready, a physician can help you weigh options like limited gluten challenge, serology history, or documentation as “probable celiac.” What’s clear is that this wasn’t just random IBS — you identified the trigger, and your body has been very consistent in its response.
    • Scott Adams
      Here are some results from a search: Top Liquid Multivitamin Picks for Celiac Needs MaryRuth's Liquid Morning Multivitamin Essentials+ – Excellent daily choice with a broad vitamin/mineral profile, easy to absorb, gluten-free, vegan, and great overall value. MaryRuth's Liquid Morning Multivitamin – Classic, well-reviewed gluten-free liquid multivitamin with essential nutrients in a readily absorbable form. MaryRuth's Morning Multivitamin w/ Hair Growth – Adds beauty-supporting ingredients (biotin, B vitamins), also gluten-free and easy to take. New Chapter Liquid Multivitamin and New Chapter Liquid Multivitamin Orange Mango – Fermented liquid form with extra nutrients and good tolerability if you prefer a whole-food-based formula. Nature's Plus Source Of Life Gold Liquid – Premium option with a broad spectrum of vitamins and plant-based nutrients. Floradix Epresat Adult Liquid Multivitamin – Highly rated gluten-free German-made liquid, good choice if taste and natural ingredients matter. NOW Foods Liquid Multi Tropical Orange – Budget-friendly liquid multivitamin with solid nutrient coverage.
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

NOTICE: This site places This site places cookies on your device (Cookie settings). on your device. Continued use is acceptance of our Terms of Use, and Privacy Policy.