The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original

[DingoGirl]

Sorry, sorry! I was caught up making tonight's dinner, which was crispy coconut chicken with maple mashed sweet potatos. I'm sure you're not interested in that....

Um HELL YES I wanna hear about this!!!!!!!!!!

the beef stuff DID sound like a yummy, juicy dip!!!! I want that too.

Alas, no good food here, and a sub-par fuzzy. Decided to have a cocktail whilst making a necklace.....I just hate to see the fuzzies come to an end. But it appears they have, with these bad oranges.

HARRUMPHFFFFFF

"Let's add curtains! And a doorbell! When you ring the doorbell, the curtains will open! And we made it horizontal, but it started to talk, so we went vertical...."

:lol: wackl!

SILLS - look at this sweet old dog!!!!!!!!

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maybe I can get another 15 years out of Weezee, the love of my life :wub:

[psawyer]

A long day here, and rain is on the way overnight has arrived. Curtains and a doorbell?

So if you girls have The Vagina Monologues, what is there for us pholks with Y chromosomes? Perhaps one of us suitably equipped should pen something and call it The Penis Soliloquies? To pee, or not to pee, that is the question.

Elisabeth Hasselbeck is on Larry King Live on CNN in minutes, talking about her book and her celiac disease. I shall be watching.

[jerseyangel]

or .. . .let's call 'em monologues.

<snort> Each one read aloud by a female Sillie a la Broadway

mushy beef stuff A La Bunnie!

That did sound delicious!

[elye]

So if you girls have The Vagina Monologues, what is there for us pholks with Y chromosomes? Perhaps one of us suitably equipped should pen something and call it The Penis Soliloquies? To pee, or not to pee, that is the question.

Penile Poetry.. . . .. .....

[mimommy]

I was kind of addicted to 'em for a while, but gave 'em up for Lent!

Don't Queens have "peepul" to do these things? Her Majesty should not be subjected to such trivia and should not just be popping out for coffee. There is responsibilties for royalty here.

One was more'n enough for moi, thanks. Coulda gone me whole life NEVER KNOWING what that experience was all about...

"Ok, now insert the probe" What?? ME???? Why do I have to insert it?

Minutes later..."Ok, now hold it in place while I go get the doctor." WIH???

The doctor came in and said "Well you were really left holding the bag, weren't you?"

Yes, Neroli, I agree. I should have staff

Was in visiting my dad last night, and while I sat chatting with him, a nurse came in and said they were going to move him downstairs for a CT scan AND an ultrasound.

Damn.. . . . next time I will be sure to have a small container of sparkles in me purse.

Sorry yer dad is still hospitalized

But, um, what exactly is he having ultrasounded? Perhaps a nice highlight would do the trick.

Anyone who is a real and genuinely decent person will see beyond the exterior to the real, wonderful person you are inside.

Hear, Hear!! Well said

Hey Bunnyrabbitt! I was on steroids just once. Doc thought it would help tendonitis (I was having problems with lots of inflammation in lots of places

Ditto. Been there.

makes me OUT OF MY MIND!!!!!!!! and - please note the slight mullet factor - - actual Queen's shorter hair, with Mimmsy's hair hanging beneath - I LURVES IT!!!!!!!!!

Mimms - hope yer day today is better than yesterday, and all inconveniences are but a memory.......

Suze!! You noticed the hair!!! I was hoping noone thought that was really my hair. The sides and bottom are, but the mullet phlip is definitely Lizzie's.

Maybe I'll put the original pic on my page thingy (too tired to think of what it's called.)

No more 'inconveniences' today, thanks Just feel like I'm in a constant state of egg production--ovary trouble, ladies. Doc said I've got cyst on the right that is "dangling like a grape". I know it's really common and all that, so not too worried about it. It's just rather uncomfortable.

_{Please don't send me to the tower BUT I forgot to congratulate our new queen}

...and may I say Ma'am,.... you're looking GOOD in yer av !!!

That's Queen Mum, to you, whelp. Now off wid 'er 'ead

TransV Invasion... . ..... This sounds like a new roller coaster ride at the Ex.....or the code name for the latest offensive in Afghanistan.. . . ...... . ..or the media tag for a potential pandemic . .. . . ...or the racehorse who came in third at the Derby. . ...

...Or an all-girl band!

Gah!

Sounds like a bad B-film.

but the LOOKS thing - obsession with appearance

BUT ENOUGH OF THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and my boss says, "are you ovulating or something?"

:lol:

Well, my two cents (for what it's worth) is that we are enculturated this way, love.

But, as James Blunt would say, "You're beautiful, it's true."

I always share my cycles chart with me boss, doesn't everyone?

[DingoGirl]

So if you girls have The Vagina Monologues, what is there for us pholks with Y chromosomes? Perhaps one of us suitably equipped should pen something and call it The Penis Soliloquies? To pee, or not to pee, that is the question.

PENIS SOLILOQUIES!!!!!!!!!!! :lol:

Seriously, Poeter, we NEED to make our millions for our Psilly Psummit and.....WHO BUT YOU <maybe with help from your author brothah?> to WRITE THESE PENILE MONOLOGUES????????

why hasn't it been DONE already?

<or has it>

<snort> Each one read aloud by a female Sillie a la Broadway

your mouth to God's ear, Padt

I always share my cycles chart with me boss, doesn't everyone?

:lol: DO YOU?? My boss did say (we have the most SERIOUSLY immature and psychotic relationship - but very funny - brother-and-sister) "how many bosses could you work for and have this kind of discussion????"

not many, methinks

Mimmsy's royal mullet

James Blount - that song is soooooooooo overplayed but I DID find *one* Blount song I liked (Carry You Home - that's the ONLY one)

quite embarassed to admit that I like ONE John Mayer song

grape-sized cyst? that must hurt mimms......is this going to be surgerized?

Sills........got nowt else........

more later..........

CARRY ON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Jestgar]

So if you girls have The Vagina Monologues, what is there for us pholks with Y chromosomes? Perhaps one of us suitably equipped should pen something and call it The Penis Soliloquies? To pee, or not to pee, that is the question.

Penile Poetry.. . . .. .....

Open Original Shared Link

[mimommy]

Can I get one on the NHS??? .... I got sparkles!

Pseuzhee!!.... see above AND I don't think you are losing yer looks AT ALL, but EVEN if you were a wizened old hag (WHICH YOU ARE NOT!!!!!!) your personality would win everyone over!!!!.....so there!!

Yeah, so there <<sticks tongue out>>

Nik--even wif sparkles, you don't want one o' those

Trust her, she speaks da troof

I remember something very like this, as well, Pahtee..... . ..a large microphony thing. Hell, did they expect to get a song outta me from there??

Like Lady Chatterly!!!

Maybe it's super powered to listen to space (but all they get is white noise)

Perhaps just a series of stage-ready soliloquoys or .. . .let's call 'em monologues.

<always wondered how well one could enunciate>

he-w-o-o. can yoo heah meee oud dere? he-w-o-o?

Soliloquies--makes it sound lurvely. If mine could talk right now I think it would be saying, "Oh no you din't "

but there's always tomorrow, when I plan to dye it myself, hence creating another chance for ruination.

Susie's hair-lacious folliclefollies

Sorry, sorry! I was caught up making tonight's dinner, which was crispy coconut chicken with maple mashed sweet potatos. I'm sure you're not interested in that....

So the beef stuff! Two pounds o beef, huge pile of diced onion, 3 ripe avocados (woulda been 4 but #4 bit the dust) and a big scoop of sour cream. Brown beef and onion, I put the onion in first for a while with butter so it would be nice and sweet and squishy. Browned up the beef w/ the onion, added garlic powder, salt, pepper, cumin. Smushed the avocados and mixed in sour cream, garlic powder & lemon juice. Which makes a fabulous veggie dip by its lonesome, then stirred into the beef stuff (did NOT drain beef, left the juice) and made mushy beef stuff A La Bunnie! It was FREAKIN DELICIOUS. Perfect with salty corn chips, and also very good cold the next day. Only thing I don't like about cold beef dips is the beef gets kinda tough and hurts my teeth, so I heated it up a bit for lunch. Just as good the next day, the avocado didn't turn at all. Would be perfect with cheesy refried beans & rice, but ran out of time.

I'm off to bed! I get up at 4:30..... yawn......

You're hired! I now proclaimeth thee royal kitchen wench.

When we saw Robin Williams he did a bit about genitalia and how they were 'built' by committee.

"Let's add curtains! And a doorbell! When you ring the doorbell, the curtains will open! And we made it horizontal, but it started to talk, so we went vertical...."

Luv him! (He's from Detroit, too )

[DingoGirl]

OMG - I totally forgot about Puppetry of the Penis :lol:

SILLIES!!!!!!!!!!!! I just had the most fantastic garden accident

:lol:

will give details tomorrow

and yes, there WAS injury

he-w-o-o. can yoo heah meee oud dere? he-w-o-o?

Soliloquies--makes it sound lurvely. If mine could talk right now I think it would be saying, "Oh no you din't "

Susie's hair-lacious folliclefollies

Mimmsy's vajay-jay speaketh!!!!!!!!!!

yer whole post

(how come the hairy hair follicles thing didn't quote?"

<oh wait - it DID >

more later sills - must tend to injuries now

[jerseyangel]

Take care of thyselph, lil' Soozle

[elye]

"Ok, now insert the probe" What?? ME???? Why do I have to insert it?

Minutes later..."Ok, now hold it in place while I go get the doctor." WIH???

Whot? Rayechull had to manoever the microphone herself?? Gah. .. . . . . .....I know there are healthcare cutbacks happening, but man. . . ....

Hmmm....Penis Poetry. .. . ......

Would it rhyme?

Be in iambic pentametre?

I know one thing for certain. . .. ....all us goils would be constantly told that each soliloquy is a huge work, only to be disappointed at the little, meagre haiku recited. . . .. . ....

[jerseyangel]

The first time I had it, I had to put it in myself, too. I thought--WIH

[mimommy]

Geez, where'd everybody go? Was it something I said?

A long day here, and rain is on the way overnight has arrived. Curtains and a doorbell?

So if you girls have The Vagina Monologues, what is there for us pholks with Y chromosomes? Perhaps one of us suitably equipped should pen something and call it The Penis Soliloquies? To pee, or not to pee, that is the question.

Elisabeth Hasselbeck is on Larry King Live on CNN in minutes, talking about her book and her celiac disease. I shall be watching.

In my experience, P-ter, the male genitalia (Don't you love that word? It sounds like a flower ) has but one thing on it's mind:

Me! Me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me (scales). Let's talk about...me. Enough about me; what do you think of me?

PENIS SOLILOQUIES!!!!!!!!!!! :lol:

Seriously, Poeter, we NEED to make our millions for our Psilly Psummit and.....WHO BUT YOU <maybe with help from your author brothah?> to WRITE THESE PENILE MONOLOGUES????????

why hasn't it been DONE already?

<or has it>

your mouth to God's ear, Padt

to your whole Penis Post!

Padt's got 'er mouth to God's ear? I guess I better start behavin' 'den

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Only you, Jess, could connect us with such lightning speed to such culture of the mind 'Tis art

No surgery. In fact, as is always the case for me, the doc just left me hangin' there. Why do they do that? Is it me, or is just bad show to tell someone they have a cyst and then say, "You're all set. You can see the girls at the front desk for your co-pay." 'Er sumpfin.

They said they'll call me.

What ever !

[tom]

So if you girls have The Vagina Monologues, what is there for us pholks with Y chromosomes?

Cocktale Hour?

[Jestgar]

Cocktale Hour?

[mimommy]

Whot? Rayechull had to manoever the microphone herself?? Gah. .. . . . . .....I know there are healthcare cutbacks happening, but man. . . ....

Hmmm....Penis Poetry. .. . ......

Would it rhyme?

Be in iambic pentametre?

I know one thing for certain. . .. ....all us goils would be constantly told that each soliloquy is a huge work, only to be disappointed at the little, meagre haiku recited. . . .. . ....

Gah!!! Dying over hear

The first time I had it, I had to put it in myself, too. I thought--WIH

My thoughts exactly

Pseriously, if one can nae stand to do de insertin' for de patient, den it virtually begs de question--why in hell is one doing this for a living?

I really, really got the impression that she had issues. Unreasonable fears, maybe. (Thought it might bite 'er?)

Crap, I'd be scared, too, I guess, if I'd heard that wee tiny muffled voice

[Jestgar]

The first time I had it, I had to put it in myself, too. I thought--WIH

Yeah, I hate it when he says that oh, wait, we're still on the microphone _{never mind}

[mimommy]

Cocktale Hour?

Cock-tales

Ladies, notice how the men start getting really interested when the conversation turns to body parts? So predictable (s-o-o pwe-dic-ta-bull).

[mimommy]

DO YOU?? My boss did say (we have the most SERIOUSLY immature and psychotic relationship - but very funny - brother-and-sister) "how many bosses could you work for and have this kind of discussion????"

If I even so much as intimated such info he'd say (in his lovely, lilting Indian accent) "what you do wit dat ting??"

Yeah, I hate it when he says that oh, wait, we're still on the microphone _{never mind}

Well, Tom, looks it's just us. What say you?

[Jestgar]

:lol: DO YOU?? My boss did say (we have the most SERIOUSLY immature and psychotic relationship - but very funny - brother-and-sister) "how many bosses could you work for and have this kind of discussion????"

I had to tell my boss the most appallingly personal things when my fibroids were at their worst.

He seems to have survived, though.

[mimommy]

Mimmsy's vajay-jay speaketh!!!!!!!!!!

Quoth the Raven

Hey Suze, are you bleedin' to death or what? Should we call EMS?

[tom]

Well, Tom, looks it's just us. What say you?

Ummmmmm . .. ..ever hear of Arcadia MI?

Got any petoskeys?

[mimommy]

Ummmmmm . .. ..ever hear of Arcadia MI?

Got any petoskeys?

Baby, I'm the best stone skipper this side of the thumb!

[tom]

Baby, I'm the best stone skipper this side of the thumb!

Hehe

No other state has anything as handy as the mitten!!

'Course, the yupers get left out.

I spent weeks every summer at a cottage on Lake Mich, betw Arcadia & Frankfort.

Great MI memories fo' me.

Me mum's side of the family all in MI.

[DingoGirl]

Whot? Rayechull had to manoever the microphone herself?? Gah. .. . . . . .....I know there are healthcare cutbacks happening, but man. . . ....

I know one thing for certain. . .. ....all us goils would be constantly told that each soliloquy is a huge work, only to be disappointed at the little, meagre haiku recited. . . .. . ....

<SNACKLE> at yer whole post, Em

The first time I had it, I had to put it in myself, too. I thought--WIH

The Vagina Microphone <good gawd, I'm only laffin' cuz I ain't had it done yet>

No surgery. In fact, as is always the case for me, the doc just left me hangin' there. Why do they do that? Is it me, or is just bad show to tell someone they have a cyst and then say, "You're all set. You can see the girls at the front desk for your co-pay." 'Er sumpfin.

They said they'll call me.

What ever !

WHOT?????? you don't get surgery? Gimme their numbers...........I'll give them WHAT FOR :harrrumphfffff:

bloody heinous, is whot is it.

Cocktale Hour?

and THERE IS PTAUM!!!!!!!!!!

Pseriously, if one can nae stand to do de insertin' for de patient, den it virtually begs de question--why in hell is one doing this for a living?

I really, really got the impression that she had issues. Unreasonable fears, maybe. (Thought it might bite 'er?)

I KNOW. what in hell?

Ladies, notice how the men start getting really interested when the conversation turns to body parts? So predictable (s-o-o pwe-dic-ta-bull).

pseriously!!

I had to tell my boss the most appallingly personal things when my fibroids were at their worst.

He seems to have survived, though.

ummmmmmm....kinda thinkin' it's a different (and more professional) thing than what I have with my "boss."

um.......thinkin' that yer boss never mentions NIPPLES???????

yeah. they talk about that, where I work. and I always say, "I'm GOING TO WEAR A TAPE RECORDER IN HERE"

and then we laff our heads off. as usual.

Quoth the Raven

Hey Suze, are you bleedin' to death or what? Should we call EMS?

'twas a spectacular fall.

Silles, do you remember that dramatic fall I had in my Perfect Neighbor's yard, when I had to grab her evil devil dog, and fell against the garden post, knocking the wee sculpture over and smacking my head? <I did see stars, and plucked many leaves from me hair>

well it was almost that good.

I had to quickly grab the Skittle Skat, and mis-stepped onto some pruned stuff, and there was this extremely savage thorny rose stalk..... a big thorn went into the bottom of me foot (blood, there was) and, I lost my footing, and fell heavily into the whole rose bush

severe arm scraping and thorn-stabbing and........a gouge into me wee baby toe

there was blood

but it was oh so funny and I wish it coulda been filmed <snackle>

I am okay!!!!

Hehe

No other state has anything as handy as the mitten!!

'Course, the yupers get left out.

I spent weeks every summer at a cottage on Lake Mich, betw Arcadia & Frankfort.

Great MI memories fo' me.

Me mum's side of the family all in MI.

I love this - - they've got their own lingo (yupers? mittens? LOVE IT!!!)

and - this Lake MIchigan summer cottage - - can we git it fer a Psilly Psummit? *sigh*

I want to GO TO there (a line from "30 Rock")

And there's Ptaum!!!! readin' along!!!!!!!!!!

HI PTAUMAUSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!