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Feeling Kind Of Down

txplowgirl

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txplowgirl Enthusiast
txplowgirl
Posted

Hey everyone, feeling kind of down today.

My relationship of 8 years ended yesterday. We got home after 6 weeks on the road and sweetie packed his stuff yesterday and left last night.

I have an aunt in the hospital who was just diagnosed with throat and lung cancer. They had to cut part of her esophagus out and she has a feeding tube and on a ventilator. Dr's are saying she has between 2 to six months left. This is my mother's only sister. She had 4 brothers and her father pass from different types of cancer. The only brother she has left now is in a nursing home with alzheimers. My mom is having a rough time at the moment. I'm kinda having a rough time myself. I ate something yesterday that is messing with me. I suspect some chips made on shared lines got me.

Well, now that I have my truck back to myself and all of his gluten stuff is out I suspect I will start feeling a lot better than I have. He understood that I couldn't eat the gluten but he just couldn't understand the cc thing plus the others like soy and dairy. He would tell me to eat just a little bit. I caught him sneaking some milk into some things I was eating a few days ago. Now I understand why i've been feeling kind of off for the past couple of weeks. Needless to say I came down on him hard and he didn't like it and so he left for good.

I guess I have been wanting this for a while because when he pulled out of the drive I felt this huge relief. I feel kind of sad but I'm more happy than sad if that makes any sense.

Anyway, I needed to get that off my chest because I think if anyone could understand all you would. Thanks for listening.

Vicky

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jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted

Oh Vicky ((((hugs))))

I'm so sorry for everything that's going on in your life right now. I do hear that relief-mixed-with-sadness about the breakup. Spend some time now for yourself, decompress, and know that in the long run someone who would sabotage your foods really isn't in your best interest.

Keeping your family in my thoughts...

Ahorsesoul Enthusiast
Ahorsesoul
Posted

Please know that my heart goes out to you during this stressful time in your life. We are here for you.

TrillumHunter Enthusiast
TrillumHunter
Posted

Take some time to care for yourself. Let yourself mourn the loss so you can move on cleanly.

Hugs to you!

rdunbar Explorer
rdunbar
Posted

I'm so sorry to hear that

I know it's a scary feeling; my father just passed away a month ago from cancer; and to be struggling with your own health and well being at the same time, and then to have little real understanding and support from anyone, it's really really tough.

I get so broken hearted about people in general just not getting it even when you explain it over and over, CC and blah blah ; it really seems people feel threatened and block it out

to have your other of 8 years pull this off it truly saddening , but...

At the same time you deserve total support in what you are doing, people who are rooting for you, so if in some weird way this turn of events opens you up to surrounding yourself with more support than you had before then that would be a positive thing despite the pain.

Every day I just focus on trying to get well because that's all I can do,

txplowgirl Enthusiast
txplowgirl
Posted
  • Author

Thanks guys, I feel a real sense of relief knowing that i'll be able to get better now. I don't have to worry about ticking him off or worrying about if what he's doing is hurting me or not. On top of everything else he was a control freak and now I don't have to worry about being told to quit "jacking my jaws" or even if I folded his underwear right. Nit picking at it's highest.

Today i'm vegetating on the couch and totally relaxing without having someone jump on me for being lazy. It's nice not having to worry about if what i'm doing is gonna irrritate him.

I'm gonna be toatally lazy for the weekend then monday i'm gonna give my truck a good scrubbing down, rearange everything and be ready to head out for another 6 weeks on the road. I'm looking forward to the rest of my life.

Thanks again for understanding.

Skylark Collaborator
Skylark
Posted

(((hugs)))

Sounds like a real rough patch with the family.

I had the same sort of experience, realizing I was with a control freak after he packed up and walked out. I cried for days, then slowly started to realize I had my life back and all the things that had been wrong.

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tictax707 Apprentice
tictax707
Posted

*HUGS* *HUGS* *HUGS* I am so sorry that you are having such a rough patch. When it rains, it pours, right? You will definitely start feeling better, both emotionally AND physically. Good grief!! He was sneaking milk when you can't have milk!?!? That is IN-EX-CUSABLE!!!!! Good for you for coming down hard and sticking to your guns. I get you on the sad-happy-sad feelings. It's understandable. The sadness will hit you sometimes, and then be not so bad others... But you are for sure on a better road now. :)

Know that we are here for you. This IS one of the best sites for us. People are on it ALL the time. Someone is always reading. Someone is always responding, someone is always thinking about you and the situation that you post. Someone is always trying to be supportive. Because of this site I finally realize that I am NOT alone. EVER. And it does wonders for my head.

You sound like you are doing many good things for yourself, so I congratulate you. B) Here's just a few more hugs and hopes for a very nice rest of the weekend.

*HUGS!!!!*

Northern Celiac Newbie
Northern Celiac
Posted

I'm sorry to hear that your realtionship ended. But the bottom line is that he was poisoning you.You are better off with out him.

chasbari Apprentice
chasbari
Posted

That's a lot to deal with all at once. My heart goes out to you. Take the time you need to deal with it. Mixed emotions I am sure but here's a chance to make sure your gluten-free diet is in good working order so you can get yourself physically feeling better. That might might the other issues easier to deal with in the long run. It's good to have a place to vent here. Strength for the journey in the meantime.

CS

Coolclimates Collaborator
Coolclimates
Posted

I'm so sorry to hear all of this, Vicky. I would say good riddance to him; his loss. You deserve someone better who will take your problem seriously and be honest.

I'm not having as many problems as you are at the moment, but I have had so much bad luck with relationships and haven't gone on a date for over 1 1/2 years. It's hard because I'm 32 and 2 of my younger cousins are getting married to wonderful guys, and I've just mainly dated real losers.

Also, I've been on the gluten-free diet for 6 weeks but am not feeling better so far. It's a bit discouraging. I was diagnosed with Celiac disease in early May. I have now gotten tested for many other food allergies, plus pollen, mold, etc. I hope I don't have more food allergies. It's been a really difficult adjustment for me with this new diet.

Anyway, enough about me. I really sympathize with you and I sure hope some better luck comes your way soon.

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