Never Had A "last Meal"

[glutenfreeinminnesota]

So, I usually try to stay positive on here...especially with new people since I know how hard this is to deal with. But, I have to vent and maybe this looming cloud over my head will go away. I never ate a last gluten meal. My last thing I ate was at a pot luck at work, frozen Simeks meatballs cooked in a crockpot....really!? I never thought, hm, I will never eat some of my favorite foods again...I should ENDULGE! Instead I STOPPED the day I found out I had Celiacs. It's been almost a year (in November) and I am just now realizing this? What the heck? But, for some reason, whenever I see a delicious pizza or sub sandwich from my favorite places....I just WISH I would have had just ONE more thing...I can't even remember the last time I actually enjoyed my favorite foods and never knew it would be the last time I would ever eat them. I am just mad at myself for the moment...it will pass I know, but I am just so angry at myself for not eating one more thing....but why hold on to the "woulda, coulda, shoulda"...nothing I can do about it now. Thanks for listening whoever reads this!!

[mushroom]

I never knowingly had a last gluten meal either. At the time it didn't seem that important - only getting rid of it. Now I purposely didn't smoke one last cigarette because I couldn't bear to think that would be the last. I just woke up one morning and said 'You've already smoked your last cigarette." Better that way

[jerseyangel]

I never knowingly had a last gluten meal either. At the time it didn't seem that important - only getting rid of it. Now I purposely didn't smoke one last cigarette because I couldn't bear to think that would be the last. I just woke up one morning and said 'You've already smoked your last cigarette." Better that way

I agree--I think it's better that way. I never had a "last meal" either. I had been so sick for a while before my endoscopy that I wasn't eating much at all and what I did eat made me sick.

The doctor saw something during the endoscopy and his orders when I left were to begin the gluten-free and lactose free diet--which I did and never looked back.

Now, at 5+ years into it, I do sorta wish I had been able to do a last hurrah, so to speak, I guess because time has put a distance between how sick I was then.

I do understand your feelings, though. I made up for it by learning how to make favorites gluten-free. After a while, your taste buds will forget what the real things tasted like and readjust. Mine did, anyway

[Jestgar]

My last gluten meal was thrown up violently a few hours after I ate it.

[i-geek]

I spent a week recovering from my "last meal" and came down with a nasty cold right after, probably due to my overtaxed immune system. So NOT worth it.

[glutenfreeinminnesota]

Haha, I suppose you are all right! I was soooo sick for years and finally had an answer...it seemed stupid to continue eating something that was "poisoning" my body...so that's why I was so quick to just do it! I always enjoyed food while I was eating it, but absolutely couldn't live with the outcome every day. I forget just how miserable I was I suppose...I miss foods that were slowly "killing" me I guess. So thank you for putting it into a better perspective for me

[cassP]

there was probably wheat in those meatballs

my last gluten meal was going to be Bang Bang Chicken and Shrimp from Cheesecake.... it's not a meal you would equate with gluten- but its one of my MOST favourite meals on the planet- and i was sure gluten was probably in the sauce (an imitation recipe online had soy sauce in it).

anyways- when i was ordering my takeout- i had a sudden CRAVING for their popcorn shrimp- and in a split second, i said what the hell and ordered it... got home and started pounding them... 2 minutes later i got hot and NAUSEOUS, heart rate shot up to 160bpm... it was HORRIBLE!!!

boy do i understand the longings tho... tonight i totally wanted to drive thru McD's... i wanted cheeseburgers!!!! with squishy buns...i could taste it

[bridgetm]

I often crave that one last sub sandwich or cookie or pizza or breaded chicken... Then I remember how awful I felt after eating that junk even before I started having trouble with gluten. Everyone apologizes for eating that junk in front of me, but I can just picture what's happening inside their bodies and feel no jealousy at all.

It's true about your taste buds though. I just brought a load of laundry upstairs and someone was baking brownies in the lounge next door to the laundry room. They smelled amazing and I thought "I want one" but then I realized that it didn't sound that good after all. The smell just reminded me that I was hungry.

[Skylark]

We really forget how desperate we were to feel better. I was so run-down I didn't really care much what I ate. At this point I'm like Bridget. I'll smell gluten food and get hungry but I wouldn't eat it.

[gf-soph]

I did do the 'one last meal' but it was mostly a lot of favourite junk like gluteny chocolate, marshmellows, bikkies etc. I will say it helped, but only because it reminded me that it really wasn't that great. I also felt pretty sick after, which helped. I think regardless of whether you had that meal or not, it's still really hard getting through the first months when everything is adjusting. Funnily enough after 2 years gluten-free, the smell of gluten toast makes me feel really queasy. Don't know why, but it does!

Interestingly, I'm 3 months through an elimination diet and believe it or not one of the challenge foods was chocolate. I loved the first few bits, but by the second day having it I realised that it wasn't nearly as nice as I imagined it was when I couldn't have it. I still have been craving it like mad once I've finished the challenge period, so knowing you don't want it that badly doesn't stop you actually wanting it...if that makes sense!

Take heart that the cravings do lessen, and I think your tastebuds really do change. At the very least, for me I think the vividness of my old taste memories have faded over time, so I don't crave things with such intensity.

[sahm-i-am]

I totally get this! And I agree that our taste buds and cravings change. I craved mushroom soup last month - I have never liked mushrooms before, but that day I was buying 3 different kinds of 'em to chop and saute! Now I crave that instead of homemade wheat bread. Weird!

But, I have not found a good substitute for Cinnabons! Oh My! The one thing that keeps me from cheating is the fear that it will taste off now and ruin the 'memories'! Hope that makes sense.

Wendi

[GlutenFreeManna]

Yikes, "last meal" makes it sound like celiac is a death sentence. You can get gluten free pizza and bread for sandwiches. I tried the King Arthur Gluten Free pizza crust recipe this weekend and it tasted almost like a Pizza Hut pizza to me. I couldn't tell it was gluten free. For bread look for Udi's or Katz. I haven't tried makign my own bread yet, but I'm going to soon because homemade gluten free goodies seem to be the best tasting.

[lynnelise]

I understand where you are coming from, I sometimes see things and wish I could have them one last time. Then I think even if I ate it again I'd still be thinking that I wish it wasn't the last time. I'm not even sure I could enjoy it because I'd be so miserable thinking about never having it again!

[sandsurfgirl]

My last gluten meal was at an all you can eat pizza place and I ended up nearly passing out from the dizzy spells, having every heart attack symptom on the list including shooting pain down my left arm, etc and ended me in the ER thinking I might die. When my husband dropped me off (no sitter and they wouldn't let our small kids come in cuz of germs) I told him "If I don't make it out of here alive or I'm unconscious please don't fall apart. Stay strong for the kids if I die." He cried dropping me off and our family lived through a day of terror.

So... it's just not worth it.

There are very few things I can't replicate gluten free or can't find in existence somewhere. Beer is a tough one. Good dark beer like Guinness, but after what I've lived through it's not worth it.

It's weird the things we grieve though. I was having a pity party myself recently because I got glutened when I ate out the last two times.

Go make yourself some gluten free treats and indulge!

[bridgetm]

Yikes, "last meal" makes it sound like celiac is a death sentence. You can get gluten free pizza and bread for sandwiches. I tried the King Arthur Gluten Free pizza crust recipe this weekend and it tasted almost like a Pizza Hut pizza to me. I couldn't tell it was gluten free. For bread look for Udi's or Katz. I haven't tried makign my own bread yet, but I'm going to soon because homemade gluten free goodies seem to be the best tasting.

I have found plenty of replacements for my favorites and I often think that they taste better than their gluten-free counterparts, but at the same time it's just not the same.

[sandsurfgirl]

I post this all the time but Gluten Free Pantry's basic white bread mix is AMAZING. So "normal" tasting, makes a nice big loaf and holds together nicely for a sandwich. Their french bread and pizza mix is great too. Makes wonderful pizza crust.

[TrillumHunter]

I have thought of that, too. I remember leaving the drs office SO FREAKING GLAD that something so simple was what made me sick for so long.

I would have had an everything bagel from my local bakery, but oh well.

[moyer17]

So, I usually try to stay positive on here...especially with new people since I know how hard this is to deal with. But, I have to vent and maybe this looming cloud over my head will go away. I never ate a last gluten meal. My last thing I ate was at a pot luck at work, frozen Simeks meatballs cooked in a crockpot....really!? I never thought, hm, I will never eat some of my favorite foods again...I should ENDULGE! Instead I STOPPED the day I found out I had Celiacs. It's been almost a year (in November) and I am just now realizing this? What the heck? But, for some reason, whenever I see a delicious pizza or sub sandwich from my favorite places....I just WISH I would have had just ONE more thing...I can't even remember the last time I actually enjoyed my favorite foods and never knew it would be the last time I would ever eat them. I am just mad at myself for the moment...it will pass I know, but I am just so angry at myself for not eating one more thing....but why hold on to the "woulda, coulda, shoulda"...nothing I can do about it now. Thanks for listening whoever reads this!!

I felt the same way, I found out through just routine tests so I was not prepared at all. The analogy of the smoker is pretty wise which is something I can relate to (quit 3 years ago) Biopsy was positive and follow up bloodwork very positive. I kind of wish I had a big store bought birthday cake that night, or perhaps a dozen donuts. Oh well, I am very fortunate that there are a number of gluten free foods and and great websites like this.

[i-geek]

Yikes, "last meal" makes it sound like celiac is a death sentence.

I think that, for me, I don't so much mourn the foods themselves as I do the convenience factor- and yes, celiac is a death sentence for convenient eating. I remember the last Jimmy John's sub I ate and how convenient it was to grab for lunch from the shop a few blocks away. It was tasty, sure, but not worth the blinding, nauseating migraine that set in an hour later. I don't care about the sub sandwich- I can make really good from-scratch gluten-free bread here at home and top it with my own meats and dressing. On the rare occasion that I want a sandwich, that does the trick. It would be so nice, though, not to have to worry about packing my lunch every single day because there's nowhere safe to eat anywhere close to my work building.

[sherrylynn]

I think that, for me, I don't so much mourn the foods themselves as I do the convenience factor- and yes, celiac is a death sentence for convenient eating. I remember the last Jimmy John's sub I ate and how convenient it was to grab for lunch from the shop a few blocks away. It was tasty, sure, but not worth the blinding, nauseating migraine that set in an hour later. I don't care about the sub sandwich- I can make really good from-scratch gluten-free bread here at home and top it with my own meats and dressing. On the rare occasion that I want a sandwich, that does the trick. It would be so nice, though, not to have to worry about packing my lunch every single day because there's nowhere safe to eat anywhere close to my work building.

That is exactly what I mourn is the conveniece of grabbing somthing from subway or mcdonalds. It is somtimes tiring to have to cook all the time.

[Cypressmyst]

It has only been 3 months for me but my last meal, unknowingly, was a hurrah. Pizza from a decent place in Milwaukee, organic brownies that were delicious, and Guiness beer. I affectionately call it the "trifecta."

The next morning I woke up feeling run down and awful and remembered my cousin telling me about gluten and to watch how I felt after I had pizza the next time (My favorite meal). So I went off gluten the next day for a month to see what improved.

Turns out that dang near everything did.

I'm not going to lie, I miss my Guiness but not at the expense of my thyroid, joints, muscles, brain etc...

But at least the last thing I had was a Guiness...totally worthy of a last gluten "meal."

Green's Dark Ale is pretty good too though. Best of all, it's not killing me. (Can't wait til they bring their stout stateside!