To Dye Or Not To Dye

[ravenwoodglass]

I am looking to rejoin the working force. Being in my midfifties I already have one strike against me as any of you older out of work folks already know. I went prematurely grey many years ago and a couple of years ago I got tired of dyeing my hair so I stopped. The back of my head is mostly dark brown but the crown and front are generously interspersed with white giving that grey effect. For the last couple months I have been going back and forth with whether I should start dyeing my hair again and wondering if it would make it easier to find a job.

Anyone got any opinions on this as I could use some input?

[GFreeMO]

I have long hair with gray mixed in so I know where you are coming from as I have thought about getting my hair colored as well. I personally am against it b/c I don't like the idea of all of those chemicals on my head. We as celiacs already have a toll take on or immune systems that I don't think we need the chemicals sitting on our heads and seeping into our pores. There are some natural hair color dyes that are sold at Whole Foods that might be a better choice. (Not sure if they are gluten free though you would have to check)

Good luck with your new job!

[Wolicki]

I think you should do whatever YOU want to do, what makes you happy. I am one who always said I would grow old gracefully. My Mom (cherokee) and all my siblings went gray in their teens. My Dad, not til 50's. At 44, I thought I still had a few more years, but no, I have gray and do not want to live with it.

My BF is 55. He was laid off during the Great Recession and thought about dying his hair for the same reasons. He thought it would give him an edge, and appear younger. I told him I LOVE his gray hair and didn't want him to change it. So he kept it gray and managed to survive and compete against the younger crowd.

If you like the gray, go with it! If you are confident in yourself, it will show to others more than what color your hair is. Me, I think I will feel more confident NOT being gray. At least til I am 50

A woman I know dyed her hair red for years. She recently let it go silver, and she is stunning. It looks so much better than the red and she looks younger!

[Takala]

I let mine grow out its natural color during the winter of 2009, out of curiosity. I had been highlighting it forever with a really mild formula that they stopped making, and I was nearly out of my stash that I had bought up that had lasted for years. My hair has been many colors, I was born very light blondish, went to darker blondish with reddish, tan -gold mixed, then it darkened by adult, then started graying in the early forties, and the grey was either white or really, really dark. What the heck is this ? It is the most puke shade of dark grey. Just a little peroxide took it back to reddish blonde. Had one hairdresser try to get me to go more ash - neutral, didn't have the heart to tell her my hair in the sun used to do this all by itself.

My mother the brunnette went to this very striking white silver fox color, and I'm blonde and it went slate grey which doesn't go with my light skin and eyes. I was pretty indignant. It looked really bad under florescent lighting.

Looked at the natural color it had become 2 years ago, now a very washed out beige grey tan, and thought.... nyaaaah. Not yet. I mean, I'm also in my mid fifties now and my hair is the color of grey mud. It is not silver, pewter, or snowy. It does not make me look dignified, wise, or patient. It is making me looked washed out. It's drab. Tired. I check it under natural sunlight, it's worse. Everybody I've asked says I look younger than my age, before this, so this has got to go. I had saved some hair trimmings from about 10 years ago, for reference color, so I picked something not quite as bright but a little darker than before.

Phew!

Much better. It's close enough to the real color the roots are not that obvious, so I don't have to do it really often, but at least I don't look older than need be.

My husband went grey very early and he looks good in it, he felt like when he was younger it gave him an advantage in seeming Mature and Serious. It seems to be a different standard for men, because now he's making quips about being too grey and getting old.

You should do what makes you happy. Other than this color thing, I only air dry my hair after a little vinegar and coconut oil. It curls. It has its own sort of personality. I don't fuss it trying to straighten it out to be sophisticated. It was so limp and pitiful before the diet change. I think you can play with the images on online sites if you are not sure.

Men truly are oblivious if you are married to them, because after what I thought was the Big Color Restoration, I don't say anything and he does not notice. . Finally, after about a week, I ask him if he thought anything was different.

"Did you cut it ?" he asks.

I am a little surprised by my reaction, I thought I would be more comfortable with the real color at this point, but then I look at one of my younger pictures and think, how is it that the grey phase is the darkest color ? How did a kid with such wondrous light hair like that in grade school, turn out that shade ?

[celiac-mommy]

I'm a dyer. I lost a lot of hair after my son was born (I was 27) and it all grew back, but it grew back grey. Just not quite ready to be grey in my 20's. Plus, my grey was also not a striking or beautiful grey. It was an ashy, dirty color. I color it myself every 4 months or so, add highlights occasionally for something new... I do agree though, totally personal decision!

[Jestgar]

Consider dyeing it a lighter color with a washout dye. Maybe you can make use of your gray to seem like highlights. I have the bride-of-Frankenstein gray at the temples and I do a color rinse once a week or so in the shower. It keeps the gray from being too obviously gray.

[ravenwoodglass]

Well I did choose the dye option. I did think about using the semipermanent color but when I have dyed my hair before the white hair was really resistant so I just went with the Garneir permanent dye. I did use a slightly lighter color than my almost black natural color and it didn't turn out bad at all. Thanks for your input everyone. Well I do now feel ready for the interviews, if and when I ever get one.

[celiac-mommy]

good luck!

[jerseyangel]

Good luck Ravenwood!!

[Jestgar]

Kick some but!!! You are ten times the person you used to be which makes you 50 times better than everyone else applying.

[BethJ]

Good luck with the job interviews! From personal experience, even if dying my hair didn't make any difference, it did make ME feel better about myself. My hair was a drab yellowish white blah grey and I accepted it as part of the natural aging process. Then our water softener started having problems and my hair began turning a curious shade of orange/pink.

First I bought one of those temporary rinses and was amazed at the difference. It became a pain in the neck as I wash my hair every day or two. Then I thought, hey, what the heck, let's try the real thing. (Silly me, it never occurred to me that I could dye it myself DUH.) Anyway, it's been five or six years now and I'm still happy with my decision.

If nothing else, it makes me happy and I hope yours will, too.

[rain]

ravenwoodglass - Good luck with the job hunt!

I've been mulling whether to dye too - with celiac I am not sure if it's the right thing to do (not to mention the cost). But I did get highlights before getting my current job. It helped me feel ready.

[IrishHeart]

Hi you!

well, I told you my thoughts about this in a PM and I am glad to see you went for it! You go, girl!! ..and you know I wish you all the best in your interviews and..of course, every day!! You rock on, Raven!

XXOO

PS... as soon as mine grows back in more, you KNOW I'm going for it, too!! LOL