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My Birthday...

healinginprogress

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healinginprogress Enthusiast
healinginprogress
Posted

Well, it's my birthday in a couple hours. My first gluten-free birthday and still on the elimination/whole foods diet. And the first year I haven't planned anything, and don't really want to see anyone because I'm NOT feeling very fun at all and don't feel like I have much to offer at the moment in a social situation. I've been in some "dark places" lately, feeling completely discouraged, depressed, confused, and just...sick, in pain, tired, etc. along with it.

While it was really "my choice" to not plan anything...although I am going to blame GLUTEN!...I still think I'm going to end up getting upset. Usually I eat and drink and have fun on my birthday. I'd even be happy to just hang out with my man tomorrow, but he'll probably be sleeping most of the day, and then working all night. I'm even working, from 4-9pm...at a bar. At the very least, hopefully people will tip well. I feel like it would be easier to say I'm pregnant than to say I can't drink!

So I'm not sure what to do...I know my guy thinks I should abandon the "diet" because it's my birthday, but I don't think he really GETS IT that it could potentially leave me sick for days (even if it's still gluten-free). But I don't think I'll get to see him much, anyways.

I apologize if it sounds like I'm feeling sorry for myself, I'm just wondering if anyone has any tips for how to get through it without turning into a blubbering depressed mess...which is entirely possible :( Considering it's already happened at least twice this week :unsure:

I guess I should at least get some rest. It's a good start, I'm sure.

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Brigit Apprentice
Brigit
Posted

Oh dear, I wrote a terribly long reply and then managed to errase it all by refreshing the browsers page. :( Silly!

I don't have time to write it all again, as I've got to leave in 5min, so the gist of my letter was, that I'm so sorry you feel like this on your birthday. I had the same experience last year. I was terribly sick with what we thought was just low iron symptoms at the time. But I'd gone and cooked the night before, ordered tables and chairs, bought everything I needed for my dinner party, and two hours before guests were to arrived just being a puddle on the floor and sobbed from the pain and utter exhaustion. My husband phoned all our friends and cancelled. I was terribly embarresed and upset to be missing out on fun and presents. ;)

But, just like for you, there will be many more birthdays for us! And far happier ones, so we have lots to look forward to. Don't let your aches and pains cloud things too much. Maybe ask your husband if the two of you can have a date night sometime soon this following week. Plan something easy but that will satisfy all your 'needs' for love, attention, affection, peace, food cravings etc. It might take some planning, but it'll be something to look forward to.

If I lived closer, I'd totally organize a bunch of flowers, a great gluten free meal for you, a team to come clean your house and woman who'll sit you down and give you manicure and a pedicure. :) How lovely would that be. Sigh.... :) But since I live all the way in Cape Town, please accept my sincerest blessings and warmest prayers for a brighter year ahead for you.

Takala Enthusiast
Takala
Posted

Really.

Do something nice for yourself if others don't want to be bothered. Go to an early movie matinee, take a safe treat in your purse. Soak in the tub with scented candles, go to the store, listen to music, read a book, a magazine, lay out in the lawnchair if your weather is not as bad as ours (Feb was nice. March is just rankly wet here.) go to the park, whatever. If you see some flowers you want, YOU pick them out and bring them home.

And if that sounds tiring, just pick one and take a nap before work.

Watch out for the full moon tomorrow night, people will be weirding out.

ravenwoodglass Mentor
ravenwoodglass
Posted

The suggestions from the previous poster were good ones. Birthdays can be hard for many of us for different reasons. I am a twinless twin and it is very hard to not go to a dark place every year and I do just what the previous poster suggested. I go to a funny movie, go shopping for something I don't need, spend the day in my garden or at a museum, go to the beauty shop and get a hair cut (bring my own shampoos etc) or take my little dog for a walk. I know your boyfreind means well but going off the diet for the day is not an option. Perhaps you could celebrate in a week or two when you are feeling better by doing something that doesn't involve food. Maybe a trip to a museum or gallery, if you like that kind of thing or get tickets for a concert you want to see. I do wish you a happy and peaceful day. Make sure you take a few minutes to enjoy the Supermoon today if your area is not too cloudy.

IrishHeart Veteran
IrishHeart
Posted

Happy Birthday, Hon!

I did not feel much like celebrating the last 3 birthdays myself. I was sick, in pain and thoroughly depressed because I did not know what the hell was wrong with me. I cried my heart out.

I know you are feeling DARK...I call this aspect of our disease the DARK SIDE OF CELIAC (Cue the da-da-daaaa...dark, mysterious music)....because it quite simply sucks the big one. (how eloquent for an English Prof, eh??

However, you deserve to celebrate YOU in any way you can. A hot soak in an epsom salt bath, nice music, a walk, splurge on flowers---yes, it is very cool to buy them for yourself, why the hell not?

Watch a funny movie.

Know that right now at this very moment, someone (that's me!)--well, there's raven and brigit too-----is thinking of you and wishing you happiness. And years of good health ahead of you! Call someone honey---don't be alone all day long.

(((hugs))) and good wishes, kiddo!

healinginprogress Enthusiast
healinginprogress
Posted
  • Author

Thank you so much, ladies...it really means a lot to me. I'm feeling a little "lighter" right now thanks to you, despite the merely two hours of sleep I got :rolleyes: IrishHeart, you even made me laugh :) And, yes, I am hoping one of the things I will be able to do today is nap...but I won't hold my breath!

The sun is out, which has been pretty rare lately, so that is lovely as well. I'm going to take my doggies for a nice walk, and then take care of some errands...the never ending trips to the grocery store, LOL, good thing I actually really enjoy grocery shopping (used to enjoy it more pre-gluten-free, of course, but still like it). And I plan on getting myself something...or some things...nice for myself while I'm at it. I can't spend too much money right now, things are a little tight, but I'll figure it out...I don't need expensive things to bring a smile to my face or bring me comfort (although a night's stay at a hotel room with a BATHTUB in it would be nice...miss baths! AND ALSO, everything BRIGIT said sounded AMAZING, and just the fact that you thought of all that stuff makes me feel good).

Okay...this CAN be a good day...this WILL be a good day. And I will also try to be happy and thankful that I know now how to get better and that I AM healing...things will get better.

Thanks again...I have left "THE DARK SIDE", at least for now :D

healinginprogress Enthusiast
healinginprogress
Posted
  • Author

And BRIGIT, forgive my ignorance, but I had to google Cape Town...WOW, you really DO live far away!!! :o

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IrishHeart Veteran
IrishHeart
Posted

oops, sorry I forgot about the lack of a tub ...dang it...how about a foot soak??

Sounds like you have the right attitude!!!....go, have a good day, sweetie!!

yup, Brigit is pretty far away, but if we lived near each other, (I am in NY) I would have come to the party as well.... :)

mamaw Community Regular
mamaw
Posted

I know I'm late on sending birthday wishes but I wish you a big happy birthday. Hang in htere it will get better... Go & buy a gluten-free cake mix & eat the whole thing yourself !!!!!. Most of all you are on your way to better health , healing takes time & I don't think any of us are patient.. BUt never let anyone talk or take you away from this process.

blessings

mamaw

Fire Fairy Enthusiast
Fire Fairy
Posted

Happy Birthday! I hope you have a great day and get lots of big tips tonight. My first gluten-free Birthday is next Sunday. I plan to shop and watch movies. :)

ravenwoodglass Mentor
ravenwoodglass
Posted

oops, sorry I forgot about the lack of a tub ...dang it...how about a foot soak??

Using a few drops of your favorite perfume and then paint all your toenails different bright colors. That will be a smile to your face for a couple of weeks whenever you take off your socks. :D

Brigit Apprentice
Brigit
Posted

oops, sorry I forgot about the lack of a tub ...dang it...how about a foot soak??

Sounds like you have the right attitude!!!....go, have a good day, sweetie!!

yup, Brigit is pretty far away, but if we lived near each other, (I am in NY) I would have come to the party as well.... :)

:) And what a great party it would be!

Have a nice weekend ladies!!

Brigit Apprentice
Brigit
Posted

I know I'm late on sending birthday wishes but I wish you a big happy birthday. Hang in htere it will get better... Go & buy a gluten-free cake mix & eat the whole thing yourself !!!!!. Most of all you are on your way to better health , healing takes time & I don't think any of us are patient.. BUt never let anyone talk or take you away from this process.

blessings

mamaw

Jip, this process is worth it! Thanks for the encouragement, I need to be reminded of it to!

IrishHeart Veteran
IrishHeart
Posted

Jip, this process is worth it! Thanks for the encouragement, I need to be reminded of it to!

me too....I had an uncharacteristic pity party yesterday for myself and everyone on here came to my rescue...okay, let's stay the course, girls...we're going to be all right!! ;) cheers!!

And you feeling better today, Brigit?? Hope so!

iamsarar Rookie
iamsarar
Posted

My First gluten free birthday is next Saturday. At first I didn't want to do anything either, but then I decided I wanted to celebrate me! I am so glad I know what is wrong and I am working on fixing it! We are going to go to P.F. Changs for dinner because they have a gluten free menu and then some shopping! Stand up and celebrate you. Find something you enjoy. Buy a Betty Crocker Gluten free cake mix and a can of frosting and enjoy! Happy Birthday!!!!!!!:)

ravenwoodglass Mentor
ravenwoodglass
Posted

My First gluten free birthday is next Saturday. At first I didn't want to do anything either, but then I decided I wanted to celebrate me! I am so glad I know what is wrong and I am working on fixing it!

Hope you have a great birthday along with all the other folks who are having one so close to diagnosis. Although the changes are hard you are going to experience the first birthdays of many that will be much healthier and likely you will be celebrating many more birthdays than you would without the diagnosis.

So happy first birthdays to you all!

IrishHeart Veteran
IrishHeart
Posted

DITTO what Raven just said!!

It's funny, but I was thinking this afternoon, I will have the HAPPIEST birthday come November, :D because I will feel GREAT for the first time since I can recall...talk about looking forward to better times... :lol: YEEHAW!

Gee, I hope your day was a good one, kiddo!!!

(and I know you are following a strict diet, so cake was out...but someday down the road, when your tummy feels up to it, do have some gluten-free cake and put a candle on it!!) ;)

RVLori Rookie
RVLori
Posted

Happy birthday to you. Do celebrate yourself. I was just diagnosed with Celiac Disease on Tuesday and my birhday was on Thursday. I decided I would wait until Friday to start my gluten free life at the age of 53. 30 years of going to doctors and I am thrilled to find out what may be causing many of my problems. I just wish I wouldn't have gone overboard eating everything in site on Thursday, because I woke up wanting to die on Friday :(

Life is about attitude - and just pretending you are happy can actually make you feel happy after a few tries. Put a smile on your face and a postive attitude in your mind. Things can always be worse. Trust me on that one. So have a great day.

healinginprogress Enthusiast
healinginprogress
Posted
  • Author

Thank you for all the birthday wishes and suggestions!!! Unfortunately, Saturday was nothing like I had hoped for my birthday, but I survived. I bought myself a sweatshirt, which was the nice thing I did for myself. I went to see my very best girlfriend ever, who I don't get to see very often, because I needed a hug....and she told me she's moving to the Yukon in 8 weeks with her wife :( Then I worked, nobody announced my birthday, I was in so much pain that I barely told anybody but ended up making decent tips anyways. After that, I went off to meet up with a friend who is moving to California...well MOVED to California on Sunday :( So I had a little cry with him, then I went home, took a Percocet for my pain, ate an entire box of Enjoy Life chocolate chip soft-baked cookies LOL I hadn't tried them before, but they are free of the 10 common allergens, so they were still kind of keeping in line with my elimination diet :P And then I passed out.

Meh.

BUT!~ Today my man has the night off so when I got home from work we went out to my first gluten-free dinner and are going on a date! :D So far the meal is settling well!

lynnelise Apprentice
lynnelise
Posted

Sorry your actual birthday wasn't so hot! I was in the same boat this year with a kidney and double ear infection. I had to get a shot in the butt on my b-day that made me sicker than a dog! I did like you and had a birthday do over later in the week! :) So glad your first meal out has settled well! Happy belated birthday and I hope you continue to improve so next year can be your best b-day yet!

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