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The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original


TriticusToxicum

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jerseyangel Proficient
and, seventh place overall just proves that.......I really do have no life :lol:

And what, pray tell in the sam hill, does phirst place mean???? :o:ph34r::unsure:

Jess--you're here!


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Jestgar Rising Star

Civkebs are learnin t'fly. The white one leapt out of her box, scampered around the room for a few minutes, then suddenly realized she had no way to get back in to her box. For about a minute she stood there, eying me sideways, then suddenly raced up my knee, hurled herself into the box and raced all the way back into the cat carrier where she could be safe from....? scary tomato plants??. Anyway. Made me laugh.

Sorry. haven't drunk enough to be entertaining, but did have a fab time. We decided that, since banks have insufficient money to make bank robbery profitable right now, we're gonna open a cloning center somewhere on a small, non-governmented island. I'll do the cloning, she'll create a computer network to store the persons' memories so you can be re-established into a new body with the same thoughts (it'll really be you). All we need is someone to figure out how to transfer the memories between the human neural net and the silicon neural net.

Anyone good at this?

happygirl Collaborator

Jess, I had a margarita tonight for ya. Hope you are hanging in there.

Jestgar Rising Star
Jess, I had a margarita tonight for ya. Hope you are hanging in there.

Just knowing the sillies are drinking in support makes everything better :)

DingoGirl Enthusiast
And what, pray tell in the sam hill, does phirst place mean????

it means you are our ever-lovin' Texas Angel :wub: and always there for us, and everyone. Such a comfort in this mean world.

Sorry. haven't drunk enough to be entertaining, but did have a fab time. We decided that, since banks have insufficient money to make bank robbery profitable right now, we're gonna open a cloning center somewhere on a small, non-governmented island. I'll do the cloning, she'll create a computer network to store the persons' memories so you can be re-established into a new body with the same thoughts (it'll really be you). All we need is someone to figure out how to transfer the memories between the human neural net and the silicon neural net.

Anyone good at this?

:blink: methinks Poeter's bruvvah? I see a new series a-brewin :lol:

Love yer civkeb story - but - um - don't you think the wee bird was escapin' from them evil kittehs?????? :lol: I don't think the tomatoes are really that threatening.

Jess, I had a margarita tonight for ya. Hope you are hanging in there.

:wub: Laura!

yes - drinkin' in solidarity here :wub:<is THAT my excuse? >

sillies - I, the one with no life, just caught the first 10 minutes of - what is that show with J. Love Hewitt? with psychic powers? Ghost Whisperer?

well - she had a psychotic dream that she was in labor, gave birth, and then, when she awoke, her litter was about five or six of those really scary, nekkid hairless kittens with big ears (what are those called? hairless Rex?)

:lol:

very Psilly dream if I ever did hear one :lol:

maybe she was about to slather orange Tiger Lion Pig Balm betwixt their feral, hairless toes

:unsure:

curlyfries Contributor
very Psilly dream if I ever did hear one :lol:

Pregnancy brings on the psilliest dreams.......I think every pregnant woman has dreamt of having a litter :D

Can't believe you haven't been pestered more about your impending upcoming date, Soozie........inquring minds want to know!!!!!! :D

Bev.......hang in there.........I see a rainbow in your future.........(or is that Skittles?)

I know what!! :o ........You can use all of us as yer character references on your job apps!!!!! :lol:

I've been out dancing tonite......a benefit dance in our honor.

I'm pooped......it's a good pooped :D

Tomorrow I get to have a one hour private lesson from a pro! :)

Oh......and we like to try to control what the blue google smurfs talk about. If you go to my profile, I have them trained to advertise dance lessons!

DingoGirl Enthusiast
Can't believe you haven't been pestered more about your impending upcoming date, Soozie........inquring minds want to know!!!!!! :D

:lol: it's become boring and blas


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Jestgar Rising Star
:lol: it's become boring and blas
elye Community Regular

Morning, Psillies!!

OMG.....A cloning island, headed up by Jyessss. ....... :unsure: . .. . ...

I absolutely cannot imagine ANYBODY wanting ME cloned. :lol::lol:

Just knowing the sillies are drinking in support makes everything better :)

We're one supportive group that way. Yup, you can always be countin' on us, there!

Pregnancy brings on the psilliest dreams.......I think every pregnant woman has dreamt of having a litter.....

Can't believe you haven't been pestered more about your impending upcoming date, Soozie.......

Dear gawd....I read this, and immediately thought that our Leeeesargh was speaking about Soooozle's DUE DATE. :o

Um, Soooooze??. .. ... . ......

:lol:

The Blue Googlers. .. . . . .....was hopin' we would see some pertinent ads for penis slings in the last couple of pages, but no go. . . . . . ..hell, I even drew one with emoticons!

mimommy Contributor

Good morning!

Hope all slept well. Thunder kept waking me up all night, lost power a couple of times.

Update on my ducky--she's flown the proverbial coop. Haven't seen hide nor tail feather of her in 2&1/2 days, but there are a couple of broken egg shells about 8 feet from the nest. The nest itself does not appear to have been disturbed at all, so not likely to have been a critter attack. I hope they hatched and headed the half mile to the canal/creek by the main road. We're disappointed that we didn't get to see it, though.

Lots of household chores and shopping to do today, or else we will all be hungry, smelly, dirty, covered in dog and cat hair.

*note to self: quit job, hire maid, become woman of leisure

mimommy Contributor
Morning, Psillies!!

OMG.....A cloning island, headed up by Jyessss. ....... :unsure: . .. . ...

The Blue Googlers. .. . . . .....was hopin' we would see some pertinent ads for penis slings in the last couple of pages, but no go. . . . . . ..hell, I even drew one with emoticons!

Cloning island strikes me as....creepy :o

"The Blue Googlers"--I think I saw them in Vegas. Good show ;)

jerseyangel Proficient

Gawd....I was in the middle of a post and lost it :angry:

Anywho....where was I??? Soozle's date. The wine went straight to me head last night and I fell asleep. Is the date tonight? I want to know everything--consider yerselph pestered :lol:

Leesaugh--you went dancing!! :D Hope the benefit raised lots of money--sounds like it was a great time! Have phun at yer lesson, Ms Twinkletoes. B)

Minimom--yer duck flew the coop :o Didn't even wait till you could be there--that's gratitude for ya..... <_< I'm right there with you on the chores and shopping. Gotta get meselph movin.....

Jess--if you're still here have a grand time wif yer phamily!! :D

Happy Saturday everyone :D

Judyin Philly Enthusiast
Gawd....I was in the middle of a post and lost it :angry:

Anywho....where was I??? Soozle's date. The wine went straight to me head last night and I fell asleep. Is the date tonight? I want to know everything--consider yerselph pestered :lol:

Leesaugh--you went dancing!! :D Hope the benefit raised lots of money--sounds like it was a great time! Have phun at yer lesson, Ms Twinkletoes. B)

Minimom--yer duck flew the coop :o Didn't even wait till you could be there--that's gratitude for ya..... <_< I'm right there with you on the chores and shopping. Gotta get meselph movin.....

Jess--if you're still here have a grand time wif yer phamily!! :D

Happy Saturday everyone :D

I'm doing it again Patti

i had all the same things quoted so....................easier and faster for me as i'm heading to the basement :ph34r:

have a great day every one

Susie yes i watched the Farrar show too

gives me strength but seems kinda near the end and she fought so hard.

have a great day everyone.

Jess .........hang in there

hope the babies are out of shells and with momma

Jestgar Rising Star

aww, Judy trapped in the dungeon basement again. :angry:

Me bro left a message last night, they are exhausted and they'll call me when they get up, so I'm still here.

Put the t'maters outside for the weekend. Have given the cats huge bowls of food. Have an assortment of people coming over to peer at the chicks. Think I got it all covered.

elye Community Regular

You have a busy weekend ahead, Jyessss. . . . ....and yer brother has come from Norway!...Wow, a long way, and lots of consequential jetlag, methinks.......

flourgirl Apprentice

Mornin everybody! It IS still morning, isn't it? My pholks left this morning for home, by way of another sisters' house in New Jersey. Mom is very worried about an upcoming hip replacement. She had both knees done some time ago.....back when they zipped open the knees and left a huge scar. Hopefully she has a much easier time with this! My parents are in their 80's and are both amazing!

GJshesster!!! I SO hope you phind just what you need! Sometimes we really resist the very changes that we need to have. Sorry that you had to reach such a state to get there. I just know the next leg of your life's journey will be a good one....of peace and contentment! (If you DO end up on an island....will it be tropical? You may find me coming for a permanent visit :lol: )

Shhhhh-room....sending prayers and positive energies to you! Hope you find relief very soon....along with the rest of us, of course.

Leeeee-sah!!! Dancing Kween.....so glad for your dancing adventure. Hope it was just what you needed to refresh your heart and soul. :wub:

Em...I just know you'll find the perfect outfit for the white-trash party! Don't phorget to phill us in on the deee-tails.

New birdies in the yard. A thrasher has decided not to be shy....struts around where we can see him...so beautphhhul! 2 Kingbirds.....bathing by doing a fly-by skim across the pond. I Luv my yard :P And of course....thankfully....the birdies all came out to show off for my family. I miss them already <:snivellyface:>

shiny day to you all...

jerseyangel Proficient

Hi T--shiny day to you!! :D

My MIL had a hip replacement a few years ago and did really well. She had such severe pain before, and she's not one to complain so we knew it was bad. She had the surgery and follow-up PT. She'll be 90 next month, and continues to do well, with no pain in the area at all.

I hope your mom has just as good of an experience with it--your pholks sound great! :)

elye Community Regular
A thrasher has decided not to be shy....struts around where we can see him...so beautphhhul!

Oh, a thrasher!! I read over it quickly, and thought you had typed flasher, which would have fit just as logically.. . . . but may not have sat so well with you, Tareeee, sitting at the breakfast table. . . . . .. :rolleyes:

JNBunnie1 Community Regular

Well, I can happily say that no poo crimes have resulted from my coffee indulgence yesterday!

Fortunately for Mimmsy, I won't need to buy a laptop so I can keep up from the potty.....

nikki-uk Enthusiast

EMOTISCROTUMS!!!!!!!!!! :lol:

you need to be thinking more along the lines of Hyacinth Boo-kay's sister's husband - that wife-beater-wearing slob :lol: :lol: what's his name? fat, slovenly, missing front teeth, never seems to be doing anything productive?

that would be the equivalent, methinks :lol:

Onslow!!!!!!!!!

:lol:

Oh we Brits got a load of pholk like that - 'cept they live on 'council estates' instead of trailer parks............. wait, :unsure: , *I* live on a council estate :o ........... and DC sits outside 7/11 :lol:

: I must send you some music, STAT!!!!!!!!!!!!

Um Raychull, do you like 'wannabee' by the Spice girls??? :lol:

Civkebs are learnin t'fly. The white one leapt out of her box, scampered around the room for a few minutes, then suddenly realized she had no way to get back in to her box. For about a minute she stood there, eying me sideways, then suddenly raced up my knee, hurled herself into the box and raced all the way back into the cat carrier where she could be safe from....? scary tomato plants??. Anyway. Made me laugh.

:D So cute!!!

Those tomato plants are scary a$$ b@st@*ds ain't they??? <_<

We decided that, since banks have insufficient money to make bank robbery profitable right now, we're gonna open a cloning center somewhere on a small, non-governmented island. I'll do the cloning, she'll create a computer network to store the persons' memories so you can be re-established into a new body with the same thoughts (it'll really be you). All we need is someone to figure out how to transfer the memories between the human neural net and the silicon neural net.

Anyone good at this?

Would you believe I have been working on this very subject?!?!?!? :unsure::lol:

Jess, I had a margarita tonight for ya. Hope you are hanging in there.

LAURA!!!! :D

I've been out dancing tonite......a benefit dance in our honor.

:D Hope it made loads o' $$$$$

Are you kidding? :o We've all had a great time on your dates! :P

Damn straight!!!! ( :lol: ) <living vicariously>

Well, I can happily say that no poo crimes have resulted from my coffee indulgence yesterday!

Fortunately for Mimmsy, I won't need to buy a laptop so I can keep up from the potty.....

Negative poo crimes!!!!!

HURRAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! B)

GAAAWD it's windy out today - chilly too, but managed to plant out more flowers from the greenhouse

PROductive day really !!!

JOODEE come out the basement!!!!!!

DingoGirl Enthusiast

Morning Sills :)

bloody hot here <_< Am not happy.

but happy that our NICOLA came through, I sent her a pm for assistance on a thread for a UK cOeliac, and there she was! :)

Tired, Sills. got nowt. Walked the Weez, lots of sweat (me) and panting (the dog). BAH!

PLEASE don't get excited about my "date." It's really nothing, although he has answered the questions I asked very thoughtfully and correctly, via email. Shocking. :lol: And, he has NOT sent a deluge of over-eager texts and emails. But, I just don't care.....I never get too worked up over these things any more, it's just sumfin' to do. :rolleyes: Plus, I am highly doubting he will smell really yummy. :huh: Just a feeling I have.

So - hardly worth talking about as I'm really quite sure this will be the ONLY time we get together.

Don't ask me why - just a hunch. It will be pleasant, but not worth pursuing. This is my prediction.

BTW - in my past - I have known three times, before ever even having one date with those three, that each of those WOULD become a serious relationship......psychic predictions came true. :blink:

somehow, I have a sense about these things.

*yawn*

groggy today.....I think it's the heat, sapping my will to live. :lol:

elye Community Regular
Oh we Brits got a load of pholk like that - 'cept they live on 'council estates' instead of trailer parks............. wait, :unsure: , *I* live on a council estate :o ........... and DC sits outside 7/11 :lol:

Nikerler! What's your wardrobe like?? I need some help with this themed party.... . . . . ..

:lol:

Those tomato plants are scary a$ b@st@*ds ain't they??? <_<

:lol::lol: Crackin' me up. . . . . . ..

Hey! The Preakness tonight!! This time, the favorite is a FILLY!!!!! Rachel Alexandra -- she could be only the fourth filly in the race's 133-year history to win it.

YOU GO, GIRL, GO!!!!

Sooooze, I DO wish that I lived next door to you.....I could just pop over and lend you my penii earrings for your date this eve. A very reliable, all-encompassing test for a potential suitor, certainly. Is the bloke comfortable enough about his manhood to be staring at its symbolic representation, hanging and jiggling right in front of him? You learn a whole lot, quickly, when you fasten these babies onto yer ears and head out on a first date..... .. ...

:huh::lol:

nikki-uk Enthusiast
(what are those called? hairless Rex?)

Cornish Rex??

Plus, I am highly doubting he will smell really yummy. :huh:

Nae problem, just

slather orange Tiger Lion Pig Balm betwixt their feral, hairless toes:unsure:

Sorted!!!! ;) OR make him wash in the most LUSH soap I bought today which is Shea butter and ginger

DAMN! I fancy myselph with this on!!!!!!! :lol:

Just checking me latest ebay tatt......WHY has no-one bidded on me voile eyelet panels from IKEA?!?! ..... a bargain starting @ 99p :rolleyes:

Nikerler! What's your wardrobe like?? I need some help with this themed party.... . . . . ..

Got a reeeeeal nice lacey crop top WITH frayed hem denim mini ??? :huh: .....I can lend it yer BUT t'is me best outfit..yer GOTTA take care of it!!!!!!!!!

elye Community Regular
Got a reeeeeal nice lacey crop top WITH frayed hem denim mini ??? :huh: .....I can lend it yer BUT t'is me best outfit..yer GOTTA take care of it!!!!!!!!!

Mygawd, I'm all set! Everything I need. .. .....perhaps I can get the piece de resistance, a mesh cowboy hat, from Texan Pahteigh. . ...... :lol::lol:

curlyfries Contributor

Hip replacement......FIL had one of those recently.....he's a new man, running even, at 80+ yrs old! :)

Breakfast table flasher........had one of those when the kids were small. Never actually saw anything. he would always be covered with alittle hand towel or what I swear looked like women's beige underwear. :blink:

Dance was nice.....not as many people as we had hoped, but there was another dance going on elsewhere in town that night. But moneywise it went pretty good, cuz there were also donations from people who didn't show......dance phobia or summat. :rolleyes: We'll be sending it all to Nathan.

Had me private lesson today and may go dancing again tomorrow....it's our usual club night. B)

HARRUMPH!! I have too much important stuff goin on to be bothered with laundry and stuff! <_<

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