Sprueberg-- A Gluten Free City

[jerseyangel]

Danny Duodenum.

[Lisa16]

Oh yes-- wearing pink tights, no less... with high top chockie taylors.

Theme music for Danny to dance to?

[Lisa16]

Ooh! I almost forgot the cheerleaders!

What will their uniform be?

[elye]

Goodness, I'm starting to think we'll be needing a parade..... . . ...

Um, around here somewhere we've stored some care bear floats, marshmallow blasters, a motorized hot tub and Chuck Norris paraphrenalia. ......He, of course, could be the Grand Marshall....him or David Hasselhoff, and neither of them are celiac that we know of, but....well......... . ..um.....hey, why in hell were those two in our last parade, anyways??

[flourgirl]

I especially liked the idea of doctors who not only have a few clues....but actually KNOW what they are dealing with, how to deal with it, and all of the factors in, around, between! Yay!!! Maybe even a one-stop-doc-shop ( ) for all autoimmune disorders and related issues.

Lots of tranquility gardens (complete with napping areas.....hammocks?). Employers who give lunch hours with time for naps. Community-wide health insurance. Any kind of food you might even dream of having....all gluten free. Hot tubs in every home.

[DingoGirl]

you guys are killin' me :lol:

jeans with smaller butt cheek space?????????? (I got busted for too many quotes)

WHOT? some of us GAINED weight with the gluten-free diet, ya know (I was a size 4 all my life, then GAINED 30 pounds - BAH!!!!!!!!) I NEED the jeans with the booty space

gluten-free building materials

And the tallest building would be IGA tower!

Can I propose we purchase an island and a weekly charter plane for vacationing worry free. I live on the US/Canadian border and it's pretty cold much of the year.

brilliant!

There would be a gluten-free version of Mrs Fields in the malls so we could have freshbaked soft cookies.

Bars would all have gluten-free beers and wine, lots of wine. And gluten-free french fries and chicken tenders and club sandwiches.

*sniff* can you imagine..........no cc'd fryers.......and all kinds of fried clams, oysters, etc...........

And everything would be "normal" priced

"Tropical Sprueville"--hee, hee, hee!! That is precious!

On the beaches, bloated bellies and not so perfect skin would be the norm--no air brushed bods here, I tell you. And in the dance clubs instead of the Hustle or the Bump the favorite dances would be the "shuffle" and the "limp" (for all those achy joints). The state motto would be "Let them eat..Rice!" A soldier would still be called a GI, but with a whole new level of meaning and a sworn oath to protect the people from the unholy grain. ( They won at Glutanomo Bay, remember.) The museum would be full of priceless art, and we would finally know the secret behind Mona Lisa's smile (she passed gas and blamed it on the dog, of course.) Our national anthem would go something like..."For the land of the gluten free, and the home of DH".

dear gawd!!!! Where have you been? we have over 2,000 pages of just this sort of madness going on, and have we seen you, or ANY of you, over there?? nooooooooo................get OVER THERE!!!!!!!!!!!!

:lol:

When people want to order food at a restaurant with gluten in it, they have to order off a special menu. And no matter how many questions they ask, they are never really sure if their meal will have gluten in it. Muwahahahahaha!!!!!

<evil smile> bah ha ha ha!!!!!! they will SUFFER!!!!!!!!!!

I kinda think with all the cookies and pizza we will all need hiney jeans!!

All guests will have to go through a comtamination process. Their gluten food will be confiscated and they will be forced to eat gluten-free for their entire stay! Really cuts down on in-law visits!

Students will come from all over the world to attend our D-Free University. The cafeteria will never contaminate anyone and will have the world renowned Chef Dulce baking all their desserts.

hear, hear!!!!!!!!!!

What mascot will we have?

And what will the theme music be?

I think...........a yeti!!!!!!!!!!! (See the Silly Thread for details )

Goodness, I'm starting to think we'll be needing a parade..... . . ...

Um, around here somewhere we've stored some care bear floats, marshmallow blasters, a motorized hot tub and Chuck Norris paraphrenalia. ......He, of course, could be the Grand Marshall....him or David Hasselhoff, and neither of them are celiac that we know of, but....well......... . ..um.....hey, why in hell were those two in our last parade, anyways??

now watch out, or, they are going to think we're......crazy, or sumthin :lol:

but all of the above is true, really!!! It's all in there

Lots of tranquility gardens (complete with napping areas.....hammocks?). Employers who give lunch hours with time for naps. Community-wide health insurance. Any kind of food you might even dream of having....all gluten free. Hot tubs in every home.

blissful!!!!!!!!

[ang1e0251]

Whatever song we choose for the cheerleaders, it must have "Doo-doo run, run..." in it...

I think the color brown should be banned. We've washed enough brown skid marks out for a lifetime.

There might not be enough entries for our first parade so we could have a nice pink healthy intestine. You know like the dragon in the Chinese New Year? It could start out all coiled up, then when the "Doo-doo run, run.." starts it can uncoil and dance the length of the whole county!

[Lisa16]

The cheerleaders could be "the happy villi." Danny duodenum and the Happy Villi!

The trick will be the cheerleader costumes. How do you get them to have happy villi without looking like over-sized condoms? I guess you couldn't use hats with a single villus/um (not sure of singular form) on top.

Love the Chinese new year intestine idea! And it would have hundreds of guys inside-- all wearing tights. I love a guy in tights (I teach 1500/1600 theater for this very reason).

The Parade Marshall can be Dr. Peter Green this year. And we can ahave a float with the celiac queen! It will be sponsored by Scott tissue and there will be lots of guys in tp roll costumes handing out gluten-free candy to little kids (sponsored by ROCK, of course). They will also be wearing tights :-)

[blueeyedmanda]

We need to make sure we have a Wegmans too--celiac heaven.

[elye]

dear gawd!!!! Where have you been? we have over 2,000 pages of just this sort of madness going on, and have we seen you, or ANY of you, over there?? nooooooooo................get OVER THERE!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hear, hear!!!!! Where have you hilarious nuts all been???

Doo Doo Run Run....poifect.

An unfurling, coiling duodenum is fantastic. With bells, cymbals. . . ...bringing good luck to all.......

[ang1e0251]

The trick will be the cheerleader costumes. How do you get them to have happy villi without looking like over-sized condoms? I guess you couldn't use hats with a single villus/um (not sure of singular form) on top.

The costumes could be covered in those soft plastic projectiles like those silly balls you can buy. I think that would work.

[mushroom]

The costumes could be covered in those soft plastic projectiles like those silly balls you can buy. I think that would work.

How about deely boppers?

[Lisa16]

Oh yes! Deely bobber on the heads like antennae and costumes made from lots of squiggly balls! But we need a better color.

All the pictures of villi that I have seen show them as kind of a grey-white color.

Not very happy.

Violet villi?? But then they might clash with Danny.

Have been humming the theme song all day! A doo-doo run run, a doo-doo run!

[jerseyangel]

The costumes could be covered in those soft plastic projectiles like those silly balls you can buy. I think that would work.

Yes! All I could think of was those fabric softener balls with all the soft "spikes" sticking out all over!

[RiceGuy]

The healthy pink dragon is a great idea! Just let's not have it breathing fire, ok?

Some songs might include:

"I'm Still Standing" by Elton John

"Tubthumping" by Chumbawamba (I get knocked down, but I get up again)

"Pressure" by Billy Joel

"It's a Gas" by Alfred E. Neuman

"Like a Rock" by Bob Seger

"Coming Up" by Paul McCartney

"That Smell" by Lynyrd Skynyrd

"My Favorite Diseases" by Mike Agranoff

Followed by a speech by "Colon" Powell.

But Scott tissue? I think we could do better than that...

[jerseyangel]

Followed by a speech by "Colon" Powell.

<snort>

:P

[Lisa16]

Riceguy, the music is divine! Some of them I didn't know but I looked at them on youtube.

My favorite is the Tubthumping. It captures the heroic nature of our existence.

Do you work in a music store or something?

BTW

What's wrong with Scott tissue? It is about the best out there for certain situations; plus it is a subtle homage to the founder of the board.

I bet you would also like a speech from Cantaeatno W. Rice. The w stands for wheat-- a little known fact.

[lonewolf]

What about our professional sports teams? The football and baseball stadiums will sell gluten-free Garlic Fries, Mo-jo potatoes, nachos, hot dogs, beer and all the other fun food you eat at a game. The basketball arena will have similar food along with gluten-free, Soy-free teriyaki, dairy-free ice "cream" and gluten-free sub sandwiches.

[DingoGirl]

Doo Doo Run Run....poifect.

An unfurling, coiling duodenum is fantastic. With bells, cymbals. . . ...bringing good luck to all.......

Yes! love this. In an exaggerated pink colour, methinks

How about deely boppers?

I like this. what are they?

Oh yes! Deely bobber on the heads like antennae and costumes made from lots of squiggly balls!

this wacky sentence brings me joy!

Yes! All I could think of was those fabric softener balls with all the soft "spikes" sticking out all over!

um.......Padt......what are those?????? What sort of fancy thing do you have going ON there, in your laundry?

The healthy pink dragon is a great idea! Just let's not have it breathing fire, ok?

Some songs might include:

"I'm Still Standing" by Elton John

"Tubthumping" by Chumbawamba (I get knocked down, but I get up again)

"Pressure" by Billy Joel

"It's a Gas" by Alfred E. Neuman

"Like a Rock" by Bob Seger

"Coming Up" by Paul McCartney

"That Smell" by Lynyrd Skynyrd

"My Favorite Diseases" by Mike Agranoff

Followed by a speech by "Colon" Powell.

But Scott tissue? I think we could do better than that...

excellent, all of this! but I think the dragon SHOULD breathe fire!!!! more....impact!

BTW

What's wrong with Scott tissue? It is about the best out there for certain situations; plus it is a subtle homage to the founder of the board.

I bet you would also like a speech from Cantaeatno W. Rice. The w stands for wheat-- a little known fact.

:lol: SCOTT tissue!!! percect!!!!

What about our professional sports teams? The football and baseball stadiums will sell gluten-free Garlic Fries, Mo-jo potatoes, nachos, hot dogs, beer and all the other fun food you eat at a game. The basketball arena will have similar food along with gluten-free, Soy-free teriyaki, dairy-free ice "cream" and gluten-free sub sandwiches.

oh dear gawd YES to all of this!!!!!!!!

If I have to suffer through some heinous ball game, I WANT some gluten-free yummy treats!!!!!!

AND gluten-free beer, given out freely, thank you very much

[flourgirl]

And of course we need the yearly (better yet 2ce yearly) community faires! Lots of junky food offerings......candy apples...fried bread dough (my personal favorite)...chicken....sausage roll.. .BBQ pulled pork sandwiches....all of it and no fears of contamination!!!! Rides for the adventurous...games of chance ....rides on Clydesdale horses (I am awed by these animals)...on and on.

A cultural center for the arts....museums, concerts, art/craft shops, sidewalk cafes, spontaneous dancing in the streets among the street musicians (heheh)

[ang1e0251]

We must have a fashion center! But on our runways no pale waifs with bored angry expressions. Our models will have pink cheeks. All the fabrics will look fabulous on less than perfect bodies and even better if the bloat interferes. These fabrics will softly drape and expand from size 6 to 9 months pregnant without notice.

[RiceGuy]

Riceguy, the music is divine! Some of them I didn't know but I looked at them on youtube.

My favorite is the Tubthumping. It captures the heroic nature of our existence.

Do you work in a music store or something?

No, but I've always had a deep interest in music, and I collect obscure recordings.

BTW

What's wrong with Scott tissue? It is about the best out there for certain situations; plus it is a subtle homage to the founder of the board.

Well, no offense to the board's founder, but the only tissue of that brand I know of is the cheap single-ply stuff. I know they supposedly make better, but haven't seen it.

[purple]

We must have a fashion center! But on our runways no pale waifs with bored angry expressions. Our models will have pink cheeks. All the fabrics will look fabulous on less than perfect bodies and even better if the bloat interferes. These fabrics will softly drape and expand from size 6 to 9 months pregnant without notice.

Kiddies can play safely and learn all their alphabet besides C and D

C and D will no longer be "bad" letters

[lonewolf]

All school lunches will be gluten-free and every child's birthday party will have gluten-free, dairy free and soy free pizza, cake and ice cream. Our children will never have to ask, "are you sure I can eat this?"

[mimommy]

Our children will never have to ask, "are you sure I can eat this?"

Sniffle, sob, sniffle...yes, and never again having to be asked by the other kids, "But what's wrong with you? Why do you have to eat that?" i needz a hug