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How Should I Handle This In The Future?

BigDogz

By BigDogz
in Coping with Celiac Disease

Recommended Posts

ravenwoodglass Mentor
ravenwoodglass
Posted

Lastly, I thought the whole purpose of this forum was to gain knowledge and help from others. I'm relatively new to this whole celiac disease thing and that's what I tried to do by posting, but you chose to give me a lot of grief. I now understand what my Dad meant when he said, "The more I see of human behavior, the more I love our dog."

To all of those who gave suggestions and supported me in the spirit of this forum, thank you. I very much appreciate your kindness and help.

I know it's hard but try not to take things to personally. People don't know our circumstances and at times they will jump to conclusions that are appropriate to their lives but not ours. It's hard but try not to let it get to you.

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  • Replies 52
  • Created
  • Last Reply
Reba32 Rookie
Reba32
Posted

to answer your orginal question, as I did before "how to avoid this in future" is to get your own drinks. Talk to the bartender yourself. If you're avoiding HFCS and caffiene, then have club soda. Sure, it's nice to be included, but not at the expense of your health. If you don't know about alcohol, then ASK. Don't leave it to chance.

DeerGirl Apprentice
DeerGirl
Posted

Looks like your original question got a little lost. I could make a few suggestions that may help you in your future social events -- there's no reason you can't join in and have a good time with your friends.

As noted by other responders, "wine coolers" will be malt beverages. Perhaps you were thinking of a wine 'spritzer' - which is simply wine with seltzer. Wine, champagne, port, most liqueurs will be gluten-free. You could try a gin & tonic which is both safe and simple.

If you don't want to drink alcohol and want to avoid soda you can try having: Seltzer (or club soda) with a lime wedge. You'll avoid the HFCS and sugar that way.

As for finding a drink you might like, or finding out what common ingredients go into drinks I found this site -- Open Original Shared Link You'll find in different 'bartender's bibles' different ratios of ingredients in drinks, but it gives you a rough idea.

good luck!

tarnalberry Community Regular
tarnalberry
Posted

I wanted to make one more suggestion - go to the bar (maybe when you first head in, if you don't want to do it while a round is being ordered) and talk to the bartender (find one who isn't really really busy). Ask him to be creative, but give your limitations. You might say something like: "I'm a light drinker, and soda doesn't sit well with me. I can't have any beverages with malt either. Any ideas on something you can mix up that will be new and exciting?" Really, bartenders can be crazy creative, and you'll be giving him/her a challenge. You may need to work with him/her to verify stuff is gluten-free, but if the place isn't really busy, they'll probably appreciate the challenge (regardless of whether or not they find it weird :) ).

SGWhiskers Collaborator
SGWhiskers
Posted

I'm a light weight too and overly paranoid about consuming anything prepared outside of my kitchen.

My standbys are

If I don't know what to order, white wine. Socially appropriate in every situation and you can sip one glass all night if you don't want to drink much.

If I'm in the mood for something daring I'll order a "Black Russian" (Vodka and kaluah) or a "White Russian" The same plus cream. It will knock you on your butt though. "Kalahua and cream" is weaker though. They are sweet drinks. I suspect yop would like Kalahua and cream if you love ice cream.

At the end of the night, I might order Kalauah and Coffee.

I love the Tequlia Sunrise idea. A sweet/tart kind of flavor.

As for controlling the cross contamination of the drink, I usually make "trips to the bathroom" and swing by the bar to talk to the bar tender or waitress as necessary. If I had any question about the safety of a drink, I might trade it in on one of my "trips to the bathroom."

My, I sound like a lush. Reality is that I get migraines from alcohol unless I'm having a great body day. I usually skip the alcohol in favor of juice, soda, or tea.

Cranberry and orange juice is one of my favorite virgin drinks.

sandsurfgirl Collaborator
sandsurfgirl
Posted

Bigdogz you don't have to justify anything to ANYONE. You are FINE. We are all learning.

It makes me mad to no end that two posters had to come here and be so downright RUDE to you when you are asking for HELP.

My God aren't we all suffering enough? Isn't it enough that we even need to be on this board without people jumping on someone who needs advice and support?

I love it how you are being lectured about being polite by somebody going off on you and being so totally impolite. Snarky comments like "you're not in high school anymore" and lectures like "you are responsible for what you put in your mouth" are totally INAPPROPRIATE and have NO PLACE on this board.

This is our SAFE support forum. Play nice people.

Bigdogz you got a lot of great support on here. IGNORE the others.

sandsurfgirl Collaborator
sandsurfgirl
Posted

Well, now that I've had the misfortune of reading the response to the response.....

.... You, and not anyone else, are responsible for what goes into your mouth, even in social situations. Unless you're physically incapacitated or an infant being hand fed. This means you must make a good faith effort to make your order precise AND gluten free.

If your need to "blend in socially" includes deliberately risking making yourself sick the next day(s) because you won't clearly tell a waiter what you need, and are unwilling to ask the bartender (an ingredients expert, usually) if they have some vodka made with potato not wheat, and could they put that with something else over ice, or just get you a glass of plain wine, then lambasting other people for making safe suggestions is just being done to be difficult.

Seriously? You need to be THAT insulting and demeaning to somebody who asks a question? This post is BEYOND insulting and just totally uncalled for. This really makes me mad.

Can you not read???? When did Bigdogz say that there was any DELIBERATE risk being taken?

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TrillumHunter Enthusiast
TrillumHunter
Posted

No idea why you got jumped on over this.... I hope it doesn't drive you away. I, too, would like to NOT have to interrogate everyone who offers me food or drink.

Anyhoo, schnapps are a good choice. They come in lots of flavors, from peppermint to peach, and you can have it with club soda or just over ice. Peppermint is delicious over ice and you have nice breath all evening.:)

NIce bars usually have a variety of juices-pineapple, tomato, orange-to chose from as well.

Take care!

psawyer Proficient
psawyer
Posted

Folks, let's keep to the original topic. It is getting personal, and that is not appropriate.

tarnalberry Community Regular
tarnalberry
Posted

Anyhoo, schnapps are a good choice. They come in lots of flavors, from peppermint to peach, and you can have it with club soda or just over ice. Peppermint is delicious over ice and you have nice breath all evening.:)

Schnapps is a tasty choice, but I'd check with the bartender before getting schnapps over ice (especially cinnamon or peppermint). The good stuff (IMHO :P) tends to be the 100 proof stuff, and a good bar will use better stuff for straight up drinks, rather than mixed ones. (Well, that's my experience tending an in-dorm "bar", anyway. :P) Speaking as a fellow feather-weight, let's just say that stuff hits you quickly and hard. Oh, that doesn't make it taste any less wonderful, of course! Not sure what I'd mix it with besides club soda... iced green tea is what comes to mind, but that doesn't sound like standard bar fare. :)

I could see peach schnapps and cranberry juice being tasty.

(I love all these ideas popping up. Not like I'll be drinking any time soon or ever very much, but it's still fun to think about the options.)

elle's mom Contributor
elle's mom
Posted

Schnapps is a tasty choice, but I'd check with the bartender before getting schnapps over ice (especially cinnamon or peppermint). The good stuff (IMHO :P) tends to be the 100 proof stuff, and a good bar will use better stuff for straight up drinks, rather than mixed ones. (Well, that's my experience tending an in-dorm "bar", anyway. :P) Speaking as a fellow feather-weight, let's just say that stuff hits you quickly and hard. Oh, that doesn't make it taste any less wonderful, of course! Not sure what I'd mix it with besides club soda... iced green tea is what comes to mind, but that doesn't sound like standard bar fare. :)

I could see peach schnapps and cranberry juice being tasty.

(I love all these ideas popping up. Not like I'll be drinking any time soon or ever very much, but it's still fun to think about the options.)

Fellow clueless/hardly-ever drinker joining in here; so is what I'm getting from this that the only drink I've ever really liked anyway (Fuzzy Navel) actually gluten free? Would this be able to be ordered anytime without asking a million qestions? Like say at a wedding reception, not necessarily in a regular bar.

MovieMaker Newbie
MovieMaker
Posted

Huh...had no idea wine coolers in the US were malt beverages! I assumed since they were called "wine" coolers that that's what they were. See, told you I'm bar/alcohol illiterate!

Can't do the Rum and Coke because of the bad reaction I have to the caffeine in the Coke but the "real" wine cooler "recipe" is inventive and a good possibility.

I'm going to show my naivety again...what all is in a Tequila Sunrise other than the obvious Tequila? Also, does it carry a big punch? At most, I've had 2 or 3 alcoholic drinks per year since I became legal at age 21...I'm now 41...so I feel its effects a lot quicker than the average person.

I looked up Amaretto on the web and, apparently, it IS gluten-free. From what I've found it's made from almond or apricot pits. I've also found a few recipes that combine Amaretto and fruit juices so I could swap out the HFCS-containing 7-Up for OJ, grapefruit juice, lemon juice, Cognac or an OJ/Grenadine mix.

Sprite and 7-up still contain High Fructose CS. Sad they don't bring back real sugar cane again. :-(

TrillumHunter Enthusiast
TrillumHunter
Posted

Mmm, a Fuzzy Navel. Yes, that is a good one I'd forgotten. I would feel comfortable ordering that one.

It's good to know about the proof of schnapps. I get it over lots of crushed ice and just sip at it over the evening. I've never had more than one.

sandsurfgirl Collaborator
sandsurfgirl
Posted

Sprite and 7-up still contain High Fructose CS. Sad they don't bring back real sugar cane again. :-(

And if you want a soda with real sugar cane you have to pay a fortune for it. Very sad.

eko413 Newbie
eko413
Posted

I hang out with more of a beer crowd, and I can sometimes find it awkward being the only one with a colorful mixed drink amongst a sea of beers, especially when friends unknowing of my condition (playfully) heckle me about my "girly drinks." In those situations I tend to go for a hard cider, like Strongbow. I'm also finding that more places are starting to carry Redbridge, a gluten free beer. Neither of these are too sweet either--I don't have the sweet tooth for many mixed drinks.

Best of luck to you. After a few months of being gluten free, I only recently started going back to the bars.

BigDogz Explorer
BigDogz
Posted
  • Author

This is a bit off the topic but since it involves another social situation, I figured I'd stick it here and see what comes of it.

I've been invited to a night at the movies with a few friends. I haven't been to a movie at a theater since I saw 'Turner & Hooch'. Yes, that was way back in 1989 and anyone that's read this thread knows my reasons why, so don't flame me about it. Anyway...that last outing was LONG before I got diagnosed and I was wondering if anyone knew if the popcorn you can get at the theaters is gluten-free?

Thanks.

buffettbride Enthusiast
buffettbride
Posted

You could probably get hard cider at lots of bars. I think they are generally safe for us.

Most are. I know Strongbow is, that's what hubby drinks.

ravenwoodglass Mentor
ravenwoodglass
Posted

This is a bit off the topic but since it involves another social situation, I figured I'd stick it here and see what comes of it.

I've been invited to a night at the movies with a few friends. I haven't been to a movie at a theater since I saw 'Turner & Hooch'. Yes, that was way back in 1989 and anyone that's read this thread knows my reasons why, so don't flame me about it. Anyway...that last outing was LONG before I got diagnosed and I was wondering if anyone knew if the popcorn you can get at the theaters is gluten-free?

Thanks.

I also hadn't been to the movies in years and went to see Legion a couple weeks ago. Should have seen Avatar but anyway...I went to a matinee on a slow day and got there a bit early. The folks behind the counter were great and one guy went and grabbed the huge barrel of 'oil' that they use and let me read the label. It looked safe so I got a small package and had no issues. I think most of the movie popcorns are going to be safe but if you can check what they use to make it that would be a good idea. You also may want to do a board search using 'movie popcorn' or ask as a question in the products section as I think this topic has come up before and you can get some input from others.

DownWithGluten Explorer
DownWithGluten
Posted

I don't feel the "need" to drink alcohol. If that was the case, I'd sure as crap have had more than 2 or 3 alcoholic beverages per year since the age of 21. And you're right, I most certainly am not in high school anymore. Wasn't even high school-ish when I was in high school - family circumstances made sure I grew up pretty damned fast and I didn't have the time or opportunity to be a teen and party, experiment with drugs, cruise in the car, go to football games, chase guys, go to school dances and get plastered at weekend parties. I wish I had - sure as hell would have beaten going to school and carrying a 3.85 GPA while caring for a terminally ill parent, trying to figure out how we were going to pay for it all and just what work a not-yet-graduated high schooler was going to be qualified to do that would bring in enough money to keep me and my sibling together when the inevitable came. So, yeah...don't lay a load of crap on me about it being immature that when I get the chance, like this grad party, I like to be able to do some of the things I missed out on.

You know, I missed out on all those things too! And I didn't even have a terminally ill parent nor was I forced to get a job. Just...the family dynamic...I suppose was such that, I don't know. I also didn't get a chance to experience all those things in high school (and some still even now :lol: ). I find it weird that the person you were responding to here said "it's not like you're in high school" meaning that's the time/place to drink...um considering it's illegal until your 21...huh? Some people fool around but some also, ya know, abide by the law. Anyway kudos to you for having a 3.85 even with all the other stress.

Anyway when I go to a bar now I always get a White Russian, as someone already suggested. It doesn't knock me flat on my butt though, maybe I'm a little more tolerant although I never thought I was :ph34r: I think screwdrivers would be safe too...isn't that just orange juice and vodka? It might be good to re-clarify with people what's in it before they mix it. The first few times I ordered White Russian after going gluten free, I would ask "...and what's in that again?" to the bartender just to double check. I am definitely NOT savvy when it comes to all the strange names for mixed drinks.

As for movie popcorn...I've shared this story before. Some...maybe most places are okay. BUT call and make sure first. Really. Because there were two different companies here...we'd called ahead and they verified it was safe blah blah. I went out of state to a different theater, different company...did not verify...but figured "Eh come on, it's probably okay." But it wasn't! It so wasn't. That was one of only two times in three years that I've been "glutened" since going gluten free. So from me, movie popcorn is NOT just guaranteed safe. I've seen others on here say they've never had a problem, but I have.

Good luck.

sandsurfgirl Collaborator
sandsurfgirl
Posted

I would call the theater ahead of time. That way you don't have to deal with figuring it out on the spot when you are there with friends.

Canadian Girl Apprentice
Canadian Girl
Posted

I know nobody has been on this post lately but I'm hoping someone can help me out with drinks on vacation?? nobody seems to kno! I am going away to an all inclusive and have no idea what i can have? like all the mixed frozen drinks are prob a bit off limits.. i'll ask if i can read the labels.. i'm sooo happy malibu is gluten free that makes me very excited as that is my fave! what about blue hawaiians tho?? anybody know if those are safe??

Lynayah Enthusiast
Lynayah
Posted

I know nobody has been on this post lately but I'm hoping someone can help me out with drinks on vacation?? nobody seems to kno! I am going away to an all inclusive and have no idea what i can have? like all the mixed frozen drinks are prob a bit off limits.. i'll ask if i can read the labels.. i'm sooo happy malibu is gluten free that makes me very excited as that is my fave! what about blue hawaiians tho?? anybody know if those are safe??

Talk to a bar manager -- let he/she know you will get very sick if you have even the smallest bit of gluten . . . and ask what they recommend.

For me: Wine, basic martini, rum and Diet Coke -- these always work.

psawyer Proficient
psawyer
Posted

For me: Wine, basic martini, rum and Diet Coke -- these always work.

These are safe choices that I fall back on, too. Cheers.

Jestgar Rising Star
Jestgar
Posted

I drink out often (but not a lot :ph34r: :ph34r: ) and I've never worried about drinks that aren't made from mixes. I even tell the bartender things like "something with vodka, not too sweet" and get some surprise. I've had pumpkin martinis, plum martinis, margaritas with any number of additional alcohols, long island ice teas, infused something-or-other with vodka, wines, bloody marys, you name it, I've probably at least had a sip and I've never had a (gluten) problem. (Did get a nasty headache from some amazingly cheap alcohol in the dive down the street from work, but the boys go there, so I go with them.)

Bars are one of the few places that I let my guard down.

Nor-TX Enthusiast
Nor-TX
Posted

Ok, I have a question about this question. Are all white and red wines gluten free? What about the fizzy wines?

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