Save Me From My Mil

[nvsmom]

My MIL is a nice person. Really. She has a good heart and cries at cute kitten comercials and all that but she is so incredibly flakey.   She and her significant other cam to stay with us this week on a vacation. So far the visit has been better than usual because hubby has taken some vacation days to visit - he's a good help, and since she comes to visit him (the boys and I  just seem to be sort of... there to her) she is in a good mood and not argumentative but... she is just so flakey!

 

Some MIL visit highlights so far:

 

She can not throw out any food or drink and will physically take leftovers from me that I am about to toss (from the kids' plates or old stuff in the fridge) and puts them on a plate or in a container that I can not get rid of unless I want dirty looks and a lecture.

 

She favours Hubby quite obviously in all things like activities, places to eat, and even gifts. For example, she was on a cruise to Alaska recently so she got Hubby a new T-shirt, she brought back one single black toque for my kids (in summer... to share ) and I was given a second hand florescent pink towel.  I know it's the thought that counts, but I just don't see much thought put into it!  LOL

 

She snoops. She'll walk into the master bedroom and look around. She has poked into closed boxes we had stacked by the storage room in the past. She hasn't been as bad this year, but she has gone through my paperwork I have stacked in the kitchen.

 

She also likes to take my things. She'll take my jackets, hats and such, and wear them (without asking) and then keep them with her things for the remainder of her visit. And whatever book I'm reading, she will pick it up, start reading and read it for the rest of the trip - a couple of times that one has flustered me as I find it hard to stop reading an interesting book. This trip it is Cooked by Michael Pollen; luckily I was only a dozen pages into it before she absconded with it so I switched to another book.

 

She likes to rearrange things. She is trying to help... I think, so when she sees the kids leave something out, she'll put it into a cupboard to get it out of the way. Yesterday she cleared a small bag of my son's candy off the table and put it in a cupboard... over the fridge... with the alcohol.   The pantry would have worked...  LOL

 

Oh! Two days ago she was rubbing lychee nuts on her face, at the table, saying it felt good and she was loofahing her face. Seriously! Last year she was scooping my coconut oil out of the jar, with her fingers, to rub onto her face as a moisturizer. 

 

Today was one of the wierdest ones. Hubbby was going to take her for a drive out to a nearby town that was badly damaged during the Alberta floods, which she used to live in. She came out of the guest room with one of my pillow cases (from the bed) that was full of bulky things. Hubby asked her about the case and teased her saying 'she had a purse so why doesn't she use it.' She said it wasn't big enough because she wanted to take her teddy bears for a drive! Yes, she travels with a few teddy bears! And yes, she did put them on the seat beside her for the drive - my 10 year old told me.  LOL  I had to go to the bathroom so I could laugh in private.

 

It's not all bad. she brought "glutenous" foods into the house but she has been very careful not to contaminate my food, which I appreciate. She watched my 5 year old climb trees and played Battleship with my 10 year old, so she is trying... a bit.  LOL

 

She is with us for a few more days. I've already thrown a party for her 70th birthday and entertained her friends so I'm getting a bit worn out... Pray that my patience holds up.  LOL

 

 

[powerofpositivethinking]

Nicole, this is too much    She sounds like a good natured person, but I would have bust out laughing during the teddy bear ride 

 

You can make it!!

[stanleymonkey]

The teddy bit made me laugh!

She sounds a bit like my SIL, except my SIL is mean and rude with it, not sure about the teddy bit as well.

She's 70 so I guess it's part of aging! My FIL 90 yr old aunt stayed with us for 3 months she did things like scrub the writing off the front of our toaster oven, and now we don't know what dial is what! Told us we needed to hand wash clothes before using the washing machine, vacuumed the dryer after every time it was used. Washed the washing machine down with bleach every day. Reaaranged all jthe kitchen cupboards as things were in the wrongplace. We just lft her to it, and put things back the way they were when she left

[Loey]

The teddy bears had me LMAO!!!!!

My dear departed spanish MIL didn't speak to me in English for the first 3 years of my marriage. I never thought she knew how. I was the (much) older, Jewish widow who stole her baby. I did finally win her over.

[GottaSki]

Thanks for the giggles....glad your visit is almost done...should tomorrow be a tough day...perhaps borrow her Teddys and arrange them lovingly on your bed...when asked what the hell you think you are doing....

 

"Well, I see how you enjoy my belongings when you visit so I thought I'd enjoy your Teddy Bears before they have to leave." 

 

 

Hang in there and thanks for the giggles!

[IrishHeart]

I do not think she's flaky. I think she's eccentric.

(I want people to use that word for me when I start doing these things as I age--it sounds more cool)

 

Hon, I do not like people poking around personal things--that's just rude--but otherwise, she seems harmless and if anything "a nervous nelly"

who needs to do things with her hands.  As long as you don't come to find that some precious items are missing AFTER she is gone (cause that would mean she is a kleptomaniac)  well, I'd say just hang in there, let her be her "eccentric self" and soon, she will be out of your hair.

 

I'd find it flattering that she likes your clothes and tastes in books so much that she wants to wear/read them.   

 

I wish my MIL had been as much fun as someone who takes teddies for a ride. (ooh, I have a stuffed bunny in my car--does that count?)

My 2nd MIL was a bitter woman who was mad at the world.I could have performed magic tricks while standing on my head and shooting money out of my butt and she still would have not been impressed by me. Poor, miserable woman.I tried so hard, but she just could not like me. I stole her son (he was 50, for heaven's sake) and she did not like his ex wife either. lol

 

.... yet, I was the one who delivered her eulogy. 

 

The first MIL was a sweetheart, but she died early of Alzheimer's. I never had a chance with FILs--they were both dead.

 

You have what I would call a "reasonable" MIL and if she is fun and stable in her moods,  I'd say you've got a good MIL. Enjoy..

 

Now, where are those lychee nuts?. I could use a good facial.

[mommida]

Well I would set up a guest basket for her.  A few novels, outsfits for her teddies, jackets and hats she can wear, and make sure they are closed up in boxes.  She has everything she usually takes from you and her snooping should be appeased by opening the boxes and having the surprise little gift.  (Other than that, let her find something that will make her never snoop again, or set a boobytrap.)

 

The teddy bears really got me too.  WOW

[IrishHeart]

  On 7/30/2013 at 2:34 PM, mommida said:

  (Other than that, let her find something that will make her never snoop again, or set a boobytrap.)

 

 

A few marbles set up against the closed door of the medicine cabinet works.

 

Better yet, hide a porn video somewhere. It may shock her, but even cooler would be if she takes it home with her.

[Adalaide]

  On 7/30/2013 at 2:34 PM, mommida said:

Well I would set up a guest basket for her.  A few novels, outsfits for her teddies, jackets and hats she can wear, and make sure they are closed up in boxes.  She has everything she usually takes from you and her snooping should be appeased by opening the boxes and having the surprise little gift.  (Other than that, let her find something that will make her never snoop again, or set a boobytrap.)

 

The teddy bears really got me too.  WOW

 

This is brilliant!

 

A few of her habits would drive me batty. And if my MIL did something like poking around our bedroom she'd pretty quickly end up being extremely sorry. That's the sort of thing that happens when you go nosing around other people's bedrooms.

 

I also like the word eccentric. Heck, I'm only 35 and the only thing keeping me from keeping a giraffe in my Jeep (buckled up and all) is that it'll be damaged by the sun. I do have giraffes that are 5-6 year old sized and would be a good car companion. When I get a new one I always put them in the shopping cart and buckle them in like a child.

 

  On 7/30/2013 at 2:47 PM, IrishHeart said:

A few marbles set up against the closed door of the medicine cabinet works.

 

Better yet, hide a porn video somewhere. It may shock her, but even cooler would be if she takes it home with her.

 

Bahaha... and if she takes it home get ones that are more and more edgy or scandalous to talk about her taking every time she visits!

[kareng]

I liked the idea of playing with her bears. 

 

You could put notes everywhere she will look that say "HI MOM!"  or "Mom- help yourself to a pair of socks". 

 

Along the lines of the porn video - have a really dirty book for her to take from you to read. 

[Adalaide]

  On 7/30/2013 at 3:38 PM, kareng said:

Along the lines of the porn video - have a really dirty book for her to take from you to read. 

 

Like 50 Shades? LOL! Okay... I know there is "worse" out there (or however you want to put it... not saying how I know) but that would just be funny to see a 70 year old lady take that from someone to read!

[nvsmom]

I got MY mom to read 50 Shades of Grey last ear, and next month she's turning 70 too.... But my mom is a spit fire who lives for her grandkids, heck next month we are all going to play laser tag for her 70th....She's quite the cool grandma even if she does wear bifocals and a bun. LOL

MIL left this morning. I have my house to myself again. . Overall it was a pretty good visit. When her boyfriend comes, she tends to be much less confrontational. I guess she is on her best behaviour for him. Hubby even commented so I know it's not just me being a prickly DIL.

Thanks for the suggestions and the laughs guys. Funny! I just couldn't do it though. I just lock my door and let her do her thing...easier for me. I am (mostly) used to her now. I have been with Hubby for 20 years and she really hasn't changed. I remember going to meet her for the first time. I saw a stick picture taped to the wall and asked if a young family member had drawn it. She said no, her "inner child" had drawn it - she drew it with her left hand! Really! LOL

Yeah... She's not eccentric, she's flakey. I've seen her howl at a full moon... She really is an experience, and now she's on her way home again.

[IrishHeart]

  On 7/31/2013 at 12:54 AM, nvsmom said:

. When her boyfriend comes, she tends to be much less confrontational. I guess she is on her best behaviour for him. Hubby even commented so I know it

 

 

ahem....er, um......she could also be a lot "happier and relaxed," shall we say?  when he is around,

if you get my drift just sayin..... 

[GottaSki]

  On 7/31/2013 at 12:59 AM, IrishHeart said:

ahem....er, um......she could also be a lot "happier and relaxed," shall we say?  when he is around,

if you get my drift just sayin..... 

 

ewww....I just had visions from the movie "Ted" -- oh my goodness -- now I picture poor Nicole being invaded by the MIL, her bears and that little pervy "Ted" -- hmmm maybe that might be fun after all...but still have to scrub me eyeballs from the visual of how she got more relaxed...thanks for that

[IrishHeart]

I wuz talkin about her BOYfriend, not a fuzzy wuzzy encounter... sillypants

 

Love the movie TED, BTW...(but I  am easily amused).

[nvsmom]

Ack! LOL

[IrishHeart]

[Adalaide]

Great... now she's gonna be traumatized. TED was on the other day so we watched it again, it doesn't stop being hysterical.