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Alcohol Problems -


Matilda

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Matilda Enthusiast

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jennyj Collaborator

I do not know much about alcohol but asking is a start and I hope that someone with more knowledge than I can give you the answers you need.

mouse Enthusiast

Both of my parents were alcoholics and so I watch how much I drink and how often. Not very often at all. I have found that since I went gluten-free almost 2 1/2 years ago, that I cannot hold my wine or anything. I could only have one drink with dinner when we went out. Two glasses of wine on an empty stomach and I am totally blitzed. I am glad that you are questioning this as that is a great start. Remember this is a holiday weekend and you might not get the answers you need until Wednesday. HUGS

lorka150 Collaborator

some wines contain casein, and i notice you are casein free.

also - perhaps there is a sulphite sensitivity involved.

Ursa Major Collaborator

Matilda, if you seriously are drinking nearly a whole bottle of wine every day, then you may be slipping into alcoholism, as that is way too much. You know, people usually get addicted to things they're allergic/intolerant to. You said the wine gives you diarrhea, that is confirmation that you really can't tolerate it.

I think you need to get support to battle this addiction. Since you understand about alcoholism through your dad, you don't want to go there! Why don't you mention it at your next Al Anon meeting? I know it takes courage, but you've made a start by posting about it here. That took guts!

Matilda Enthusiast

Thanks for your replies, everyone,

I think you've given me the impetus to just stop drinking, which is what I wanted.

I had a spell of a few months where I felt really well, and I didn't drink much at all. But I think after starting to feel ill again I've sort of slipped into using alcohol to make myself feel better, which is dangerous I know.

Ursula, thanks for your frank advice.

Matilda

gfp Enthusiast
I think you've given me the impetus to just stop drinking, which is what I wanted.

I think you obviously took that first step yourself....not knocking the advice given but the most important thing is YOU realise if YOU have a problem.

To be honest I probably drink a similar amount but the difference is I have no probs stoppng whenever. I know I'm a guy and the limits are a little different but if I go away somewhere (and my old job had me in dry countries very often) I don't even think about it...

I don't think the amount is the problem per-se (yet) but

In the last couple of months I've become aware that drinking wine gives me diarrhoea. I've tested this several times and know that I'm much better if I don't drink at all. But I'm still drinking. I gave up gluten without batting an eyelid. Even chocolate, apart from a few pangs was no problem. Despite several determined efforts not to drink wine I haven't managed it, which makes me worry that I've become addicted to alcohol. This must sound completely daft -

No it doesn't sound daft but it does give cause to worry..

If you try and give it up and haven't then this is a worry... its indicating the potential for a problem

I have a friend who drinks way more than either of us...and he stayed with me for a while last summer, indeed this guy is known for his falling asleep in bars and becoming totally incoherent but last summer he quit for 3 months (to the day)... weird but true. I myself used to drink a bottle of vodka per night (15-20 years ago) but never found it hard to stop....

You obviously realise that this is a slippery slope but it sounds like you also would like to enjoy a odd glass... as it happens I had dinner last night with the girlfriend of another friend who is an alcoholic ... he moved back to the US a year ago and his girlfriend (a lecturer in medieval romance languages) is over here for a conference .. and we were discussing this last night over wine :D

She was blaming herself a little for not being firmer over this ... but as I pointed out "when would you discuss this?" because every true alcoholic I know has more excuses and is inapproachable on the subject....

excuses like "well she drinks a diet coke every morning, its no different to me drinking beer"

"It settles my stomach"

"beer isn't real alcohol"

The list is pretty much endless but your post leads me to believe you are a long way from this....but on the start of the slippery slope non the less. You don't mention timing ... is the time you start creeping forwards each week ?

I rather think you need to take a break and I don't mean a week but perhaps 3 months. Preferably with someone you can REALLY trust to hold you to it... by which I don't mean someone who will let the odd glass go but someone who will give you a hard time ... and you need to be totally honest with them.

It needs to be someone who will take what you said here and not say "oh you are OK" ...

Its summer so if you have vacation coming up why not take the opportunity of going somewhere outside your routine to kick off not drinking?


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pixiegirl Enthusiast

I'm glad your going to stop drinking.. it would be the view of most involved with alcoholics that if you drink every day and often up to a bottle of wine.. yet are still functioning (hold a job, not falling over, no memory loss) that you are a functioning alcoholic. In my book anyone who drinks every single day has an issue with alcohol at the very least.

Best to you! Susan

Guest nini

a long long time ago in a galaxy far away I used to drink like a fish... I could drink most guys under the table... when I decided it was a problem and I was going to stop, I did just that. I stopped. And yes, alcoholism runs in my family.

It's all up to you, you've taken the most important step in admitting you think you may have a problem, now it's up to you to decide what to do about it! I know you can quit drinking if you really want to.

Kudos to you for having the strength to have this conversation.

I quit drinking years ago and haven't looked back. I don't miss it at all. One time I did try to have some wine with a family dinner and OMG I was drunk after a few sips and felt awful.

lindalee Enthusiast

Since going gluten-free, I have noticed the effects are POWERFUL like armetta said. The wine makes my stomach feel SOUR. Try just getting it out of the house and not bringing anymore in and tell your loved ones not to offer you any. Maybe that will help. LindaLee

gfp Enthusiast
I'm glad your going to stop drinking.. it would be the view of most involved with alcoholics that if you drink every day and often up to a bottle of wine.. yet are still functioning (hold a job, not falling over, no memory loss) that you are a functioning alcoholic. In my book anyone who drinks every single day has an issue with alcohol at the very least.

Best to you! Susan

Almost every Italian and French person over the age of 10-14 drinks alcohol nearly everyday. Yet you rarely see them drunk.

In contrast, most Norwegains only drink 2 days a week, however you often see them drink until they vomit and then continue drinking...and this is grown up people in business suits.

Most Norwegains consider the French and Italians to be alcoholics

However having worked in many dry countries I find that when access to alcohol is found the French and Italians rarely partake unless its good alcohol and most brits, americans and canadians seem ready to drink anything containing alcohol.

IMHO you can label them as functioning alcoholics but its pretty meaningless, the person ready to drink home made hooch has IMHO a problem and the person who will quite happily wait 3 months until they rotate off doesn't.

Terms like "functioning alcoholic" are just terms invented by people who can't control their drinking and it misses the exact point which is the addiction. If someone drinks a bottle of wine a day and doesn't have any problems stopping for 3 months then I fail to see a problem. Conversely if someone binge drinks 1-2 times a week they are more likley to have a problem.

Bringing in terms like functioning alcoholic just clouds the issue which is does someone have symptoms or problems if they are denied alcohol ... if you do then you are a alcoholic and if you don't then you are not.

queenofhearts Explorer

There is alcoholism in my family too, so I have always been somewhat wary about drinking, but I do enjoy the flavor & festivity of alcohol in moderation, so I've never been a teetotaller. But there have been times when I found myself really "needing" a drink-- that is my clear signal to cut it out entirely for a few weeks. I do NOT want to go where I've seen family members go, that's for sure.

Interestingly, it was elevated liver enzymes that FINALLY got me diagnosed with Celiac, after a lifetime of other symptoms (I'm 50). Before the Celiac diagnosis they suspected liver cysts or the like, & I stopped drinking completely for five months, just in case alcohol was at fault. I'm still drinking only 1 glass of wine a week until my 3-month check-up, just to be sure it doesn't throw off the liver functions. It's hard at parties & that sort of thing, but easier than I would have thought, given my previous habits.

I know I have an addictive personality, as I'm easily fixated on habits of all sorts, for instance I just can't start the day without solving the Crypto-Quote! (Not to mention drinking some really good coffee.) So I consciously try to fixate on healthy habits, such as exercise, which, believe me, can be just as addictive. If you are like me, I highly recommend finding something specific that you can turn to when the urge strikes. I think yoga is really good to replace evening drinking especially, since it has something of the same relaxing quality & cues you that the day's work is done & it is time to chill out. But maybe reading or knitting would work better for you. My point is it's better if you're not just sitting there missing what you can't have.

I hope this helps you stick with your decision to cut it out for a while. I think without wine you will feel better not only physically, but mentally. It is not fun to feel "powerless" especially if you've seen others go over the edge... it's kind of scary... & conquering that feeling will make you feel really safe & strong.

If you are wavering, post a message! Somebody will probably be here to help you stay strong.

Best wishes,

Leah

shai76 Explorer

If you try to quit and fail then you have a problem and you should seek help for quitting. There are lots of great support groups, and it is nothing to be ashamed of. Congratulations on realizing you might have a problem. Most people who have addictions don't make it that far. :)

plantime Contributor

If you have to ask the question, the answer is "Yes." You felt the need to ask someone if you have a problem with alcohol, that means you do. It is weighing on your mind and conscious. I am glad you have decided to quit.

gfp Enthusiast
If you have to ask the question, the answer is "Yes." You felt the need to ask someone if you have a problem with alcohol, that means you do. It is weighing on your mind and conscious. I am glad you have decided to quit.

Quite the opposite I think, most alcoholics are in denial .. while you are still asking the question then shai76's advice seems pertinent....

If you don't keep asking the question how would you ever realise there is a problem or even try quiting and realise it is a problem at least until it is too late and by that time its all or nothing. Neither did she decide to quit ... if she tries to quit and fails then she needs help but if she quits and has no problem then exersizing a little self control is probably perfectly adequate.

If you try to quit and fail then you have a problem and you should seek help for quitting. There are lots of great support groups, and it is nothing to be ashamed of. Congratulations on realizing you might have a problem. Most people who have addictions don't make it that far. smile.gif

worth repeating a second time

plantime Contributor

She said we "gave >her< the impetus to quit", which I took to mean she decided to quit. If she has to ask if drinking almost a bottle of wine a day is something to worry about, then the answer is still "Yes, it is something for you to worry about." It is not that she is drinking alot, it's that it apparently is bothering her, so she needs to do something about it.

BRUMI1968 Collaborator

I'm glad you're going to quit.

Women should not drink alcohol. As much as the news likes to tell us it is good for our hearts, women's chances of reproductive cancer go up with even as little as one alcoholic beverage every day. It is a blessing that we are the bearers of life - but it has a cost. Our bodies are more sensitive to things like 'poisons', be they fermented plant matter or pesticides or whatever. (and tea and grape juice and other things have the same qualities as wine, but without the negatives...the news doesn't like to say that.)

I don't think "defining" alcoholism is very productive here. Your definition, the one you gave in your query, is the definition that counts. You sound concerned, so there is something to be concerned about. We all know ourselves better than anyone - we just need to listen to ourselves when we know something...that is where most of us fail.

DingoGirl Enthusiast

Oh boy...is this a timely topic. I am going through the same stuggle myself and have decided I'm an alcoholic already. My drinking has seriously increased and becoming at minimum a four-day-a-week habit. Every single person on my dad's side is or was alcoholic/addict.....they're either dead now or just not drinking/using if they are still alive.

So I went to an AA meeting just last night, in fact. I went a couple of years ago, while living in Monterey, but wasn't ready to give up my wine and champagne. But it seems to be the time now, as I am having memory lapses (yeah, combining a whole bottle of wine with a few Klonepin to assuage the pain of this last year and the breakup with the toxic boyfriend) and weird brain dysfunctions.....I already take an antidepressnat and a mood stabilizer....I could easily die or go into a coma.

I just decided 10 days ago to quit for six months and then evaluate. I wanted to drink ALL day yesterday and that's what took me to a meeting last night. I'm so glad I went and will go again. My drinking really increased wtih that job at a winery for four years - lots of parties, dinners, events, and a great group of friends - they were drinking socially and lightly and I was drinking for a BUZZ, depending on it for something more. Anything became an excuse to drink - - celebrating, being depressed, being alone, being with friends.....anything. I don't know why on earth I don't have one or several DUI's - - that's just God's grace, I think. The road from Big Sur to Monterey is one of the windiest ever, with steep cliffs and the ocean on one side, and I drove that route drunk so many times....I shudder to think about it.

I am glad you're questioning, I'm in the same place but probably more severe than you are. It's so easy for alcohol to become a habit.....light daily drinking, as GFP mentioned, is very common in Europe but you can TELL when it goes from that to being a craving, an addiction, and something you really think about and focus or depend on - as I have been doing.

Blessings -

aikiducky Apprentice

An angle to think about maybe, not that I have any kind of scientific proof or anything... but to me alcohol makes my head feel a bit the same as gluten does. After quitting eating gluten, might it be that your brain is craving something similar? Maybe being completely "gluten free sober" is somehow too odd?

Another maybe slightly wacky idea... a friend of mine is interested in homeopathy, and according to him, both gluten intolerance and an addictive personality, along with a lot of other diseases and symptoms that a lot of people here on the board seem to have, are part of the same underlying condition. In the way homeopathy looks at disease apparently, diseases like celiac or diabetes for example are just symptoms of something that is wrong on a deeper level. The surprising thing to me was that when he started to read the list of related problems to me it all fit very well both to me and several other people here on this board. I don't know enough to really explain it though.

Pauliina

lorka150 Collaborator
Another maybe slightly wacky idea... a friend of mine is interested in homeopathy, and according to him, both gluten intolerance and an addictive personality, along with a lot of other diseases and symptoms that a lot of people here on the board seem to have, are part of the same underlying condition. In the way homeopathy looks at disease apparently, diseases like celiac or diabetes for example are just symptoms of something that is wrong on a deeper level. The surprising thing to me was that when he started to read the list of related problems to me it all fit very well both to me and several other people here on this board. I don't know enough to really explain it though.

Pauliina

that is really interesting. i know you said you don't know enough about it, but does your friend have any publications or anything on hand? i would love to delve more into that.

DingoGirl Enthusiast
An angle to think about maybe, not that I have any kind of scientific proof or anything... but to me alcohol makes my head feel a bit the same as gluten does. After quitting eating gluten, might it be that your brain is craving something similar? Maybe being completely "gluten free sober" is somehow too odd?

Another maybe slightly wacky idea... a friend of mine is interested in homeopathy, and according to him, both gluten intolerance and an addictive personality, along with a lot of other diseases and symptoms that a lot of people here on the board seem to have, are part of the same underlying condition. In the way homeopathy looks at disease apparently, diseases like celiac or diabetes for example are just symptoms of something that is wrong on a deeper level. The surprising thing to me was that when he started to read the list of related problems to me it all fit very well both to me and several other people here on this board. I don't know enough to really explain it though.

Pauliina

That makes sense.....but alcohol doesn't have anywhere near the same effect gluten does on me. But you know, since going gluten-free, I crave alcohol even more, I think. The cocktail hour USED to start at 6, and was getting earlier and earlier. And how about this, on weekends out of town or holiday weekends w/ friends, whatever, it could start at NOON. And when you start drinking THAT early, by the end of the evening, a lot of alcohol has been consumed.....

taz sharratt Enthusiast

havent read all the replys yet so someone has probably said this allready but, good on you for realising that you have a problem, i was told my someone that apparantly if you have a parent that is an alcholic you are predisposed to also haveing a problem with it also, my father was`an alcholic and eventualt died of it 2 months ago,his liver gave out, he had very bad tummy which got so bad that he couldnt kep food down but would still drink, ( it broke my heart to whatch ) he eventually died of a massive heart attack cos of the strain the drinking had made on him. he died alone in his flat. its not just you that suffers its your loved ones, please think of them and go to AA. my heart goes out to you, be strong.

DingoGirl Enthusiast
havent read all the replys yet so someone has probably said this allready but, good on you for realising that you have a problem, i was told my someone that apparantly if you have a parent that is an alcholic you are predisposed to also haveing a problem with it also, my father was`an alcholic and eventualt died of it 2 months ago,his liver gave out, he had very bad tummy which got so bad that he couldnt kep food down but would still drink, ( it broke my heart to whatch ) he eventually died of a massive heart attack cos of the strain the drinking had made on him. he died alone in his flat. its not just you that suffers its your loved ones, please think of them and go to AA. my heart goes out to you, be strong.

Oh Taz, I am so sorry. :( that is a terrible way to go, and just proves what an awful and very powerful grip alcohol can have on our brains and bodies....to be that sick and continue to drink....boggles the mind.

Hope you're doing okay.

Hugs -

tarnalberry Community Regular

If you feel that you are not in control, then you probably aren't. The fact that you've tried to give it up - you want to, and tried to - but can't, is another sign. If you can't do this on your own, do seek out help; AA is not the only way. The fact that it's in your family history means that it may be harder for you to quit (there's evidence that there is a genetic propensity towards alcoholism), but that doesn't mean that you can't.

gfp Enthusiast
Oh boy...is this a timely topic. I am going through the same stuggle myself and have decided I'm an alcoholic already. My drinking has seriously increased and becoming at minimum a four-day-a-week habit. Every single person on my dad's side is or was alcoholic/addict.....they're either dead now or just not

DingoGirl, now I see the post.... since I know a bit of your medical history I can guess a few of the drugs.... seriously physchotropic drugs and alcohol are pretty much a sure fire recipee for disaster...

Klonopin and alcohol is a pretty effective way to screw up your liver nor should it be used in anyone with a history of .. heck, im just repeating the product advisories PLEASE READ THIS

Open Original Shared Link

Sorry its describing a lot of your symptoms ... please just read it!

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