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The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original


TriticusToxicum

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tom Contributor
Senators lost. Down 3-0 in the series. Get the big hook......

Bah! Sharks get another chance tonight to get back home-ice advantage and even it up at 2-2.

Last game was such a travesty, who knows how they'll react.

Will do! It is a wonderful read. If anyone else would like to read Michelle's journal that she wrote during the gruelling Quest, let me know and I can email it out as an attachment...

Whennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn???????????

Yes, when considering a shoe phone, I would lean towards the suction cups. You could stick it to the side of your face, and have both hands free. VERY convenient.....

:lol:

:lol::lol: OMG....I asked Jack if we would have the wall-climbing option with the suction cups, and he looked at me like this <_< and said, "Uh, no. Come on....you guys are just being silly...."

:lol: :lol:

I think I'm leaning towards the cleats. Suction cups would make a noise that would drive me nuts after a while

VERY good point! And tipping the scales .. .. .

Boy do I have great news. I went to bed on my own last night! No sleeping pills!!!! And I slept the entire night through, to do this on a work night is a big step for me!!!

:) :)

But what, pray tell, do you attribute this wonderful development to?

SILLIES!!!!!! 'tis freezing today!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :blink: Susie is pleased. freezing and sunny. :)

Susie! I'm assuming this means it's in the high 70's er sumfin'...... :huh::rolleyes:

:lol:

51F on the patio this morning. I had to <gasp> think about putting on a jacket!!

(Thick shirt was enough tho, basking in the sun :P )

Crap, someone tell me something REALLY DELICIOUS to make for dinner. :huh: I'm outta ideas.

I sure was salivating at a broiled pork tenderloin I saw on the foodporn network yesterday <drool> Very easy too.

could I create an add-on for my shoes that will allow me to dust or mop as I walk? Or do they have to be strictly suction cups?

Or a makeup brush so's I can fix up my face while on the phone?

Ah-HA!! Lovin' the add-on loophole! I'm pretty sure that as long as the cleat/suction requirement is met, it'd be perfectly legal to enhance either. (But not to the point of covering them w/ a false sole!)


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Ridgewalker Contributor

What I want to know is, how strong are these suction cups? Ok, we can't be Spiderman, but would I have to jerk on my foot with each step? Forget that! I'd go with the cleats.

My sinus infection is back, worse than ever. I thought the doxy had it licked, but it's back. Going to call the doc for a refill. I don't know what else to do... The only abx I haven't tried are reeeeeally expensive. :ph34r:

Mtndog Collaborator

EGADS- Emily, your avatar and son are SO funny!!!!! I must say Jack would have been a favorite of mine if I was his teacher....always loved the sillies best. I've been pondering this and I have decided I'm ging with the suction cups. The noise of the cleats would drive me insane :wacko:

Reminds me of a game we used to play on road trips with our friend Nikki called "Would you rather....?" only much more disgusting like "Would you rather eat an eyeball or French kiss Susie's Zombie neighbor?" :lol:

I can't believe how hot it was the Central Valley yesterday- BLECH! My photosensitivity has gone crazy!!!

I have an announcement.....I'm having my hair cut! I decided to go a bit shorter, and wear it curly again.

oohhhhh....post pic immediately as I am considering a hair remodel.

And will the suction cups allow you to walk up walls like spiderman?

That WOULd be sweet!

Morning Sillies!!!!

Boy do I have great news. I went to bed on my own last night! No sleeping pills!!!! And I slept the entire night through, to do this on a work night is a big step for me!!!

I have my "appointment" today that we talked about a few days ago, the IT appointment....anyway I am torn, I am not sure I would like doing it and it is not really a increase in pay of anything....I am thinking about passing. Any ideas or suggestions.

Yeah! Sleep is good! I have to agree with Em about following your gut!

My sinus infection is back, worse than ever. I thought the doxy had it licked, but it's back. Going to call the doc for a refill. I don't know what else to do... The only abx I haven't tried are reeeeeally expensive. :ph34r:

Oh sarah :( :( I'd lend you my PICC line but EWWW, that would be gross. I really really really hope spring brings you and your whole family MUCH improved health!

elye Community Regular
Whennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn???????????

I emailed it your way, Ptaum....didja get it yet?

Ah-HA!! Lovin' the add-on loophole! I'm pretty sure that as long as the cleat/suction requirement is met, it'd be perfectly legal to enhance either. (But not to the point of covering them w/ a false sole!)

I'm sure enhancement is fine. Ptaum's got it--the cleat/suction requirement must be kept in place, however.

Okay, so there's a brand new EXCELLENT sentence for a newbie to set their eyes on when stumbling upon this thread.... :lol:

What I want to know is, how strong are these suction cups? Ok, we can't be Spiderman, but would I have to jerk on my foot with each step? Forget that! I'd go with the cleats.

Yep, I agree--more work than necessary. And I continue to be attracted by the tap-shoe possibility with cleats....

My sinus infection is back, worse than ever. I thought the doxy had it licked, but it's back. Going to call the doc for a refill. I don't know what else to do... The only abx I haven't tried are reeeeeally expensive. :ph34r:

GAWD, SARAH!! :(:angry::angry:

So sorry to hear this.....Hugs from over here.......

elye Community Regular

Ah! Ptaougm....just checked my email. Got a "failed delivery" notification to your address due to "account full (quota exceeded)". I'll try it again later, after you've had time to deal wif yer millions of emails......

tom Contributor

Ohhhhhhh my sillies .. . .wish we could all be face-to-face right now . . ..today might be The Day. Phoned a hypnotherapist earlier .. .. .at the time, I could've set a 4pm appt to quit smoking.

I think I'm ready to call back in the hopes 4pm is still available. <aaaaaaaaaaagh!!!!!>

Surprised that thinking of it gives me what must be a bit of a panic attack - or close to it. Hyperventilating even. <aaaaaaaaugh!!!!>

It NEEDS to be done!! So why not TODAY!!!! <aaaaaaaaaaah!!!!>

Every day, for more than 7000 days (since the 1.5yrs smoke-free after hypnosis) I've VERY rarely gone much over an hour w/out a cig.

Here we go .. . .I'm calling . . ....

Darn210 Enthusiast
Ohhhhhhh my sillies .. . .wish we could all be face-to-face right now . . ..today might be The Day. Phoned a hypnotherapist earlier .. .. .at the time, I could've set a 4pm appt to quit smoking.

I think I'm ready to call back in the hopes 4pm is still available. <aaaaaaaaaaagh!!!!!>

Surprised that thinking of it gives me what must be a bit of a panic attack - or close to it. Hyperventilating even. <aaaaaaaaugh!!!!>

It NEEDS to be done!! So why not TODAY!!!! <aaaaaaaaaaah!!!!>

Every day, for more than 7000 days (since the 1.5yrs smoke-free after hypnosis) I've VERY rarely gone much over an hour w/out a cig.

Here we go .. . .I'm calling . . ....

Your av is so appropriate . . . are you going to call on your shoe phone????? :lol::lol::lol:

I'm happy for you Tom!!! and wishing you all kinds of success!!! . . . let the hypnotherapist know about that panic-attack-thingy . . . I'm sure he/she can help with that, too!!!


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DingoGirl Enthusiast

Where is everyone today? so quiet here.......Susie is bored.........another dead battery (this time I have to buy a new one :angry: ) so am trapped at home, waiting for truck.........

AND.............most heinous of all heinosities.........just opened a (temporary) Macy's account to get a better deal on stuff and blah blah blah......so............YESTERDAY was the date to pay........and I PHORGOT about this new account and will have to pay a $25 late fee (or is it more? :angry) :(

Death by a thousand cuts, I tell ya............................ :blink: and so much for saving money.....

jerseyangel Proficient
Ohhhhhhh my sillies .. . .wish we could all be face-to-face right now . . ..today might be The Day. Phoned a hypnotherapist earlier .. .. .at the time, I could've set a 4pm appt to quit smoking.

I think I'm ready to call back in the hopes 4pm is still available. <aaaaaaaaaaagh!!!!!>

Surprised that thinking of it gives me what must be a bit of a panic attack - or close to it. Hyperventilating even. <aaaaaaaaugh!!!!>

It NEEDS to be done!! So why not TODAY!!!! <aaaaaaaaaaah!!!!>

Every day, for more than 7000 days (since the 1.5yrs smoke-free after hypnosis) I've VERY rarely gone much over an hour w/out a cig.

Here we go .. . .I'm calling . . ....

Why not today indeed!

Even though we're not actually there, we're all behind you, Ptaumn! You can do this--that anxiety will lift once you get there (I know it well)--this is the hard part....getting there.

How exciting :D

jerseyangel Proficient
AND.............most heinous of all heinosities.........just opened a (temporary) Macy's account to get a better deal on stuff and blah blah blah......so............YESTERDAY was the date to pay........and I PHORGOT about this new account and will have to pay a $25 late fee (or is it more? :angry) :(

All may not be lost :D

Call the CS number on the bill and explain that you forgot since it was a new account and sweetly ask if they would waive the late fee this one time. It's worth a shot--many times they will if it's the first time ;)

Hopefully, you'll get a guy on the phone :lol:

DingoGirl Enthusiast

Gah! How'd I miss that before, Tom calling the hypnotist on his shoe phone!!!!!!!!

Yes, we're all behind you on this.........'tis not easy.

Sarah - forgot to say I"m SO bummed about your sinus infection........got to kick them nasty buggers, once and for all. Harrumph! :angry:

battery being installed as we speak.......car's death delaying preparation of dinner.......gads.............I MUST make food for Kissey. The last two nights he has created some.......concoction.........lentils, rice, a couple of sauteed hot dogs in this ghastly mish-mash. Must make something suitable. (well, in all fairness, he DID reject my perfectly healthy and wonderful dinner of Sunday night because it "had sauce on it" - - his food pickiness is like a child's - so last night I didn't cook - tonight - I must).

sillies - we DO need a face to face, toot sweet. :huh:

elye Community Regular
Here we go .. . .I'm calling . . ....

YAYYYYY!!!!!! :):):)

I'll be thinkin' of you, Ptaumn, at what....7:00 pm my time.....

Call the CS number on the bill and explain that you forgot since it was a new account and sweetly ask if they would waive the late fee this one time. It's worth a shot--many times they will if it's the first time

Hopefully, you'll get a guy on the phone :lol:

Great idea. Do lots of purring....

tom Contributor

Daggnabbit Sarah!!! I *HATE* that pesky infection!!!!!

well, in all fairness, he DID reject my perfectly healthy and wonderful dinner of Sunday night because it "had sauce on it" -

Now THAT cracks me up :lol: .. . .sauce is SUCH a general term . ..pizza sauce, spaghetti sauce, . .... uhhhh .. . .there's more .. ...where IS my mental file of Common Universally-Enjoyed Sauces??!

So, my pork tenderloin idea fell flat? It looked SO good and SO easy. Dry rub was no more than 4 common ingred - incl plain white sugar, to my dismay.

I love the site Open Original Shared Link & the 'enter some ingred & get recipes using them' function.

***************

OK . ..I did it ..I called .. . . . .I have 88min left to be a smoker.

The hyperventilating has ceased.

I'm calm.

She better be a damn good hypnotist.

The other time, it kinda felt like it didn't work, at first. But I believe it did.

And one thing that made it easier was that I left the next morning, driving from Chicago to Tucson to finish school.

Seemed that w/ such a major life-change happening, the cigs would be easier - just in that it wasn't the biggest change goin' on.

But ohhhhhhhhhhhh it seems like there are a THOUSAND situations where I habitually light up . . ... .. .

Eyes on the Prize . .. . .maybe in a month I'm healthier than ever & perfumes don't even bother me!

Mtndog Collaborator
Every day, for more than 7000 days (since the 1.5yrs smoke-free after hypnosis) I've VERY rarely gone much over an hour w/out a cig.

Here we go .. . .I'm calling . . ....

Ptaum- I am so proud of you and your determination!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AND.............most heinous of all heinosities.........just opened a (temporary) Macy's account to get a better deal on stuff and blah blah blah......so............YESTERDAY was the date to pay........and I PHORGOT about this new account and will have to pay a $25 late fee (or is it more? :angry) :(

Death by a thousand cuts, I tell ya............................ :blink: and so much for saving money.....

Lentils and late fees? BLECH!!!!! Purr to Macy's and throw out Kissey's well-intentioned monster mush :P

Ahhhh...I am all out of sorts today too. But I did get outside and plant some pansies, you big pansies.

Uncle Ray has been tip-toeing through the tulips of humor. Here's his latest:

Health Insurance is a big question right now, especially if you are self-employed or work for a small employer.

Here is a story about what to expect when you turn 65 years.(Note: this joke may change after November.)

**********************************************************************************

MEDICARE COVERAGE IN A NUTSHELL

The phone rings and the lady of the house answers, "Hello."

"Mrs. Sanders, please."

"Speaking."

"Mrs. Sanders, this is Doctor Jones at Saint Agnes Laboratory.

When your doctor sent your husband's biopsy to the lab yesterday,

a biopsy from another Mr. Sanders arrived as well, and we are now

uncertain which one is your husband's.

Frankly the results are either bad or terrible."

"What do you mean?" Mrs. Sanders asks nervously.

"Well, one of the specimens tested positive for Alzheimer's and the other

one tested positive for AIDS. We can't tell which is your husband's."

"That's dreadful! Can't you do the test again?" questioned Mrs. Sanders.

"Normally we can, but Medicare will only pay for these expensive tests one time."

"Well, what am I supposed to do now?"

"The people at Medicare recommend that you drop your husband off somewhere

in the middle of town. If he finds his way home, don't sleep with him.

elye Community Regular
I love the site Open Original Shared Link & the 'enter some ingred & get recipes using them' function.

Ptaumn! I did not know this site existed. Excellent! I've got it bookmarked. :)

Eyes on the Prize . .. . .maybe in a month I'm healthier than ever & perfumes don't even bother me!

Yessssss! Remember my story about the old university pal I ran into--chronically sick, depressed, multiple severe food and enviornmental sensitivities....finally changed her diet, big improvement....but the final black veil was lifted when she gave up cigarettes. Then she became, finally, alive. :):)

You'll do it, Ptaumn!!

"The people at Medicare recommend that you drop your husband off somewhere

in the middle of town. If he finds his way home, don't sleep with him.

:lol::lol:

DingoGirl Enthusiast
Now THAT cracks me up :lol: .. . .sauce is SUCH a general term . ..pizza sauce, spaghetti sauce, . .... uhhhh .. . .there's more .. ...where IS my mental file of Common Universally-Enjoyed Sauces??!

:lol: the "I don't like things w/ sauce on it" discussion. now this WAS funny, as a substantial conversation did ensue. See, I was eating the MOST DELICIOUS Trader Joe's "Wine Country chicken Salad," pre-made in the fridge section, and put it atop some red leaf lettuce w/ a little salad dressing. So - Kissey looks at my offering and makes the little-boy face, scrunching his nose......"I don't like things with sauce" was applied to this chicken salad. :blink: it is NOT sauce, more of a light dressing, maybe.....it's got probably a mayonnaise base, w/ some seasoning, some dried cranberries, pecans, large chicken chunks, etc. Mighty tasty, but not....sauce. Well.....he said it had SAUCE, so taht was that. More for me (not cheap, this Janet darn stuff....... :angry: )

So....I asked him if he could/would eat my white chicken chili, because, you know, chili IS kind of saucy. No, he'll eat that. But I can't put too much cilantro in it.

I'm kind of flummoxed. He *WILL NOT* *WILL NOT* *WILL NEVER* eat onions, tomatoes, or mushrooms.....will pick each one out of anything. Can hardly endure a green vegetable.......'tis like feeding a child. :huh:

PtauM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG - is today really the day?????????????????????????? oh we must keep our fingers crossed and hope it works.............. would be phabulous!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ahhhh...I am all out of sorts today too. But I did get outside and plant some pansies, you big pansies.

Bev - out of sorts but planting pansies........well, that was one good thing. :) Hope you're better soon!

:lol: Uncle Ray.

elye Community Regular
So....I asked him if he could/would eat my white chicken chili, because, you know, chili IS kind of saucy. No, he'll eat that. But I can't put too much cilantro in it.

I'm kind of flummoxed. He *WILL NOT* *WILL NOT* *WILL NEVER* eat onions, tomatoes, or mushrooms.....will pick each one out of anything. Can hardly endure a green vegetable.......'tis like feeding a child.

Well, Susie.....we were all waiting for the ONE crack in this great crystal of perfection. There it finally is....Kissey's tragic flaw--finicky eating.

I think I could live with that. :lol::lol:

Ptaumn!! How'd it go?! How are you feeling?

Where's Nikki? Gotta hear about wee Al in Disney.....

Ridgewalker Contributor

Thanks everybody. :wub: Maybe I need a sinus transplant. Nah.... I still haven't been able to cut cigarettes out completely, although I cut waaaay back. I guess I just need to keep trying harder. This headache is miserable. I had a coughing spasm last night that was the worst thing.... Omg, my throat seized up and I couldn't breathe at all for (what felt like minutes) maybe 20-30 seconds. It eased eventually, and I ended up with a busted capilliary or something in my eyelid, and projectile vommitting... Not fun.

Susie, Ezra doesn't eat anything with sauce on it either. ;)

Tom, we can quit together, ok???

DingoGirl Enthusiast
Well, Susie.....we were all waiting for the ONE crack in this great crystal of perfection. There it finally is....Kissey's tragic flaw--finicky eating.

I think I could live with that.

:lol: Yes, his tragic flaw. Hard to cook for.

wait - there is one other, major flaw......Kissey doesn't think/view the world in the correct way. IN other words, he doesn't SEE things the way I do. :lol: :lol: Practically at all. that is just wrong. :lol:

Yes, where IS Nicola? is she in some sort of forumless abyss, where no one can hear her scream???????? :unsure:

But seriously - strangest thing. David and I don't see things in the same way, ideologically....yet this is the most peaceful, effortless, and easiest relationship I"ve ever had....

Susie, Ezra doesn't eat anything with sauce on it either. ;)

:lol: Yes, but, he's four, right? :lol: My Kissey is a grown man!!!! (I do love saying Kissey and grown man in same sentence :lol: )

Sarah!!!!!!!! :( Oh, most egregious of horrors!!!!!!!!!!! When will it end....it just HAS to, soon.

THAUGHM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! what's going on????????????????? is he in the voodoo chair, getting de-smoked?????????? :huh:

OMG sillies - - just bought TWO boxes of GLUTEN-FREE Rice Chex - they were two for $4 - I am soooooooo excited!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now Rice Chex for kissey for breakfast, lunch, and dinner!!!!!!! :lol:

tom Contributor

I remember last time too feeling there was a measure of hokey charlatanism in hypnotherapy - so I'm not discouraged by that.

I don't YET feel like a non-smoker, but I do expect to w/in the next couple days.

I didn't actually feel hip-mo-tized, but I thought the same the other time.

I get 5 "reinforcement sessions" over the next 6mos.

What the heck else did I want to say?

That immed after, as I started the car, I *did* start to reach for where a cig would be?

That I made coffee once home and at 1st sip thought a puff was next?

That I'm so far just a smoker who isn't smoking.

OK, now to go back & make fun of the sauceless etc :lol:

Darn210 Enthusiast
I didn't actually feel hip-mo-tized, but I thought the same the other time.

You know there is a way to tell, right???? Have somebody ring your doorbell. If you start clucking like a chicken, then you were hypnotized!!!!

tom Contributor

Oy Sarah, last night sounds awful!!

Thanks for all the encouragement, all y'all!!

I actually barely believe I've done this.

Me . .. . .a non-smoker .. . <_<

:lol: the "I don't like things w/ sauce on it" discussion. now this WAS funny, as a substantial conversation did ensue.

:lol: I bet!

If I were you, there would've been some moment, a few minutes in, where I'm struck w/ the thought "is he just windin' me up?". And then having to list out what does and doesn't count as a sauce .. . . :lol: I'm guessing it's just those poured on after-the-fact, not essential parts-of-the-process like pizza sauce & BBQ sauce.

There's a good chance I'm overly amused by this & thoughts of the ensuing substantial conv.

(But why did I expect saucy jokes to come tumbling forth)

I'm kind of flummoxed. He *WILL NOT* *WILL NOT* *WILL NEVER* eat onions, tomatoes,

Noooooooooooooooooooo!

Susie, Ezra doesn't eat anything with sauce on it either. ;)

Hehehehehheehheehee

Aiden doesn't like a banana that's not whole when he receives it.

Tom, we can quit together, ok???

Let's DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm at 4hrs since the Last Cig. Somehow, earlier, I decided that the rest of the night will be easier once I make it to 10pm - in 2 hrs.

Then tomorrow morn's java but no smoke will be very VERY strange.

Last time I did that was 1988.

tom Contributor

About every 8 or 12 or 5 minutes one part of the brain says "CIGTIME!", expecting me to obey, before another part says "nuh-uh - we don' do dat no mo' ".

DingoGirl Enthusiast
If I were you, there would've been some moment, a few minutes in, where I'm struck w/ the thought "is he just windin' me up?". And then having to list out what does and doesn't count as a sauce .. . . :lol:

:lol: :lol: We're actually going to have to get quite detailed in our discussions on sauce, cuz I"m not totally comprehending..... :blink:

OMG. HARRUMPHFFFFFF! :angry: I made those damned Brazilian dog biscuits cheese rolls again......they are crap. I am sooooo disappointed. did everything exactly right, and they were STILL like hard, flat little rocks. BAH!!!!!!!!!!!! :angry:

<Rice Chex it is for dinner, every night!>

About every 8 or 12 or 5 minutes one part of the brain says "CIGTIME!", expecting me to obey, before another part says "nuh-uh - we don' do dat no mo' ".

no no NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

Tis NOT cig time!!!!!!!!!!! Just.......try.........and.........resist.......until 10. It's only half an hour away!!!!!!!!!

Hey, what about that heinous book that's supposed to cure EVERYone from smoking? what is that book? will look it up......I have heard celebrities discuss it, and how heinous it was, but effective.......

Here's hoping that Sarah is having a better night........... oh. NO COUGHING ATTACKS!!!!!!! :(

Ridgewalker Contributor
Let's DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm at 4hrs since the Last Cig. Somehow, earlier, I decided that the rest of the night will be easier once I make it to 10pm - in 2 hrs.

Then tomorrow morn's java but no smoke will be very VERY strange.

Last time I did that was 1988.

Ok, I'm putting a patch on tomorrow morning!!! (Haven't been using one since I've been still smoking a little.)

About every 8 or 12 or 5 minutes one part of the brain says "CIGTIME!", expecting me to obey, before another part says "nuh-uh - we don' do dat no mo' ".

That's a good answer! I'm stealing that. :D

Hey, what about that heinous book that's supposed to cure EVERYone from smoking? what is that book? will look it up......I have heard celebrities discuss it, and how heinous it was, but effective.......

Here's hoping that Sarah is having a better night........... oh. NO COUGHING ATTACKS!!!!!!! :(

I think my mom has that book. I'll see if I can borrow it. :lol: No coughing attacks, tonight, thank goodness. That was hideous!

SUSIE! You got a MySpace page!!! :lol: I sent you an Add Friend request.

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    • trents
    • Jillian83
      Hi, I was recently diagnosed with Celiac and dermatitis herpetiformis after years of suffering without answers. I lost my mind. I lost my job. I lost so much time. I lost Me. Conventional doctors are opulent come near me and the one who did sat across the room, misdiagnosed me, pumped me full of steroids which collapsed my entire hip for 6 months. So without answers I began my holistic journey. Fast forward a couple of years and still struggling with a mysterious whole body itchy, crawling “skin hell”, perfect teeth now deteriorating, thick hair now thinning rapidly and no more than a day or 2 at most relief….An acquaintance opened up a functional medicine practice. Cash only, I found a way. Within a month tests clearly showing my off the charts gluten allergy/sensitivity as well as the depletion of vital nutrients due to leaky gut and intestinal damage. dermatitis herpetiformis was more than likely what I was experiencing with my skin. I was happy. I thought this is easy, eat healthy Whole Foods, follow the diet restrictions and I finally get to heal and feel confident and like myself again very soon! 😔 Supplements are very pricey but I got them and began my healing. Which leads to the other major issue: not working, stay at home Mom of young kids, entirely financially dependent on my man of 7 plus years. He’s never been supportive of anything I’ve ever done or been thru. He controls everything. I’m not given much money ever at a time and when he does leave money it’s only enough to possibly get gas. His excuse is that I’ll spend it on other things. So my “allowance” is inconsistent and has conditions. He withholds money from me as punishment for anything he wants. Since being diagnosed, he’s gained a new control tactic to use as punishment. He now is in control of when I get to eat. He asked for proof of my diagnosis and diet bc he said I made it up just to be able to eat expensive organic foods. Then after I sent him my file from my doctor he then said she wasn’t a real doctor. 😡. I go days upon days starving, sometimes breaking down and eating things I shouldn’t bc I’m so sick then I pay horribly while he gets annoyed and angry bc I’m not keeping up with all the duties I’m supposed to be doing. His abuse turns full on when I’m down and it’s in these desperate times when I need his support and care the most that I’m punished with silence, being starved, ignored, belittled. He will create more of a mess just bc I’m unable to get up and clean so that when I am better, I’m so overwhelmed with chores to catch up that the stress causes me to go right back into a flare from hell and the cycle repeats. I’m punished for being sick. I’m belittled for starving and asking for healthy clean water. I’m purposely left out of his life. He won’t even tell me he’s going to the grocery or to get dinner bc he doesn’t want me to ask him for anything. I have no one. I have nothing. Im not better. My supplements ran out and I desperately need Vitamin D3 and a methylated B complex at the very minimal just to function….he stares at me blankly…no, a slight smirk, no words. He’s happiest when im miserable and I am miserable.  this is so long and im condensing as much as I can but this situation is so complicated and disgusting. And it’s currently my life. The “IT” girl, the healthy, beautiful, perfect skin, perfect teeth, thick and curly locks for days, creative and talented IT girl….now I won’t even leave this house bc Im ashamed of what this has dont to my body, my skin. Im disgusted. The stress is keeping me from healing and I think he knows that and that’s why he continues to keep me in that state. He doesn’t want me confident or successful. He doesn’t want me healed and healthy bc then how would he put the blame of all his problems on me? This journey has been hell and I’ve been in Hell before. I’ve been killed by an ex, I’ve been raped, robbed, held hostage, abused beyond nightmares but the cruelty I’ve experienced from him bc of this disease is the coldest I’ve ever experienced. I’ve wanted to give up. Starving and in tears, desperate…I found a local food pantry in our small town so I reached out just saying I had Celiac and was on hard times. This woman is blessing me daily with prepared gluten free meals, donations, educational info, people who know this disease and how they manage life and the blessings just keep coming. But it’s overwhelming and I feel like I don’t deserve it at all. He just glared and I know he’s going to sabotage it somehow. I don’t even know what to do anymore. I’m so broken and just want peace and healing. 
    • cristiana
      @Colleen H   I am just curious,  when you were tested for coeliac disease, did the doctors find out if you had any deficiencies? Sometimes muscle pain can be caused by certain deficiencies, for example, magnesium, vitamin D, calcium, and potassium.   Might be worth looking into having some more tests.  Pins and needles can be neuropathy, again caused by deficiencies, such as iron and B12,  which can be reversed if these deficiencies are addressed. In the UK where I live we are usually only tested for iron, B12 and vitamin D deficiencies at diagnosis.   I was very iron anemic and supplementation made a big difference.  B12 was low normal, but in other countries the UK's low normal would be considered a deficiency.  My vitamin D was low normal, and I've been supplementing ever since (when I remember to take it!) My pins and needles definitely started to improve when my known deficiencies were addressed.  My nutritionist also gave me a broad spectrum supplement which really helped, because I suspect I wasn't just deficient in what I mention above but in many other vitamins and minerals.  But a word of warning, don't take iron unless blood tests reveal you actually need it, and if you are taking it your levels must be regularly monitored because too much can make you ill.  (And if you are currently taking iron, that might actually be making your stomach sore - it did mine, so my GP changed my iron supplementation to a gentler form, ferrous gluconate). Lastly, have you been trying to take anything to lessen the pain in your gut?  I get a sore stomach periodically, usually when I've had too much rich food, or when I have had to take an aspirin or certain antibiotics, or after glutening.  When this happens, I take for just a few days a small daily dose of OTC omeprazole.  I also follow a reflux or gastritis diet. There are lots online but the common denominators to these diets is you need to cut out caffeine, alcohol, rich, spicy, acidic food etc and eat small regularly spaced meals.   When I get a sore stomach, I also find it helpful to drink lots of water.  I also find hot water with a few slices of ginger very soothing to sip, or camomile tea.  A wedge pillow at night is good for reflux. Also,  best not to eat a meal 2-3 hours before going to bed. If the stomach pain is getting worse, though, it would be wise to see the doctor again. I hope some of this helps. Cristiana    
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