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The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original


TriticusToxicum

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tom Contributor
and - this Lake MIchigan summer cottage - - can we git it fer a Psilly Psummit? *sigh*

Better not all get CC'd together .. ..it had an outhouse :ph34r:

And it's not in the family anymore . .. ..used to belong to grandparents.

Was quite idyllic.

I want to GO TO there :lol: (a line from "30 Rock")

<musicalnotes> "Workin' on the night cheese .. . ." :lol:


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mimommy Contributor
Hehe

No other state has anything as handy as the mitten!!

'Course, the yupers get left out.

I spent weeks every summer at a cottage on Lake Mich, betw Arcadia & Frankfort.

Great MI memories fo' me. :)

Me mum's side of the family all in MI.

Lake Michigan is beautiful. Scott and I stopped for an overnight in Harbor Springs on our way back from his Blue Gorilla reunion a couple years back. Was fun--went to the new casino. I went to Traverse City as a kid, and will soon take our daughter to the big water park there.

When I was growing up my friend's grandparents had a place on Deer Lake outside of Boyne (Boyne/Macinac are about 5 hours north of me--I'm in Clinton Township). I spent a lot of time there--4 seasons. They used to call us "Fudgies" cuz they said we only came up for the fudge!

My husband's family has a cottage on Houghton Lake, so we go Up North several times every summer. It's totally commercial there though, more retiree than rustic--yes, there is a Wal-Mart in Prudinville :ph34r:.

The Vagina Microphone :lol:<good gawd, I'm only laffin' cuz I ain't had it done yet> :o

WHOT?????? :angry:you don't get surgery? Gimme their numbers...........I'll give them WHAT FOR :harrrumphfffff:

bloody heinous, is whot is it. :(

'twas a spectacular fall.

severe arm scraping and thorn-stabbing and........a gouge into me wee baby toe :huh:

but it was oh so funny and I wish it coulda been filmed <snackle>

I love this - - they've got their own lingo :wub:(yupers? mittens?[/i] :huh: LOVE IT!!!)

and - this Lake MIchigan summer cottage - - can we git it fer a Psilly Psummit? *sigh*

I want to GO TO there :lol: (a line from "30 Rock")

I hope you never need one Suze!

I have been attacked by fallen in a rosebush on more than one occassion and those scratches hurt! hope you're not too banged up today--bet the marks are pretty red and sore :(

But, laughing at the thought of your 'physical humor'. I laugh at with you, cuz I'm glad I'm not the only clod round here :lol:

Yes--we Michiganders have our own built in MAP--our hand! I'm by Lake St. Clair on the bottom right of the thumb bone where it meets the palm ;) We're between Sterling Heights and Mt. Clemens, about 10-15 miles north of Detroit. Yupers are the Upper Peninsula folks (don't go there much--that Macinac bridge is wayyyy scary).

Well guys, the sun is coming up. Time to fill my coffee cup and start the marathon my day. :wub: and XOXOXO to all. Have a great day, friends!

mushroom Proficient

Have read but have no time to respond to all the wackl going on here! Glad to see Knickers paying proper respect to our regal Ruler (she did, after all call you Ma'am). Let 'er keep 'er head for now, Your Majesty. She may come in useful later :ph34r:

Yes--we Michiganders have our own built in MAP--our hand! I'm by Lake St. Clair on the bottom right of the thumb bone where it meets the palm ;)

All right, tell me, are we talking about the left or right hand here? (She with precious little geographical knowledge of de GREAT lakes--all I knows is Michigan is the left one!

Well guys, the sun is coming up.

De sun is comin; up??? WIH?? Just had luverly moon rise here but there is a southerly blast heading our way from the Antarctic any minute now, and it promises to obliterate moon and then sun and viciously interfere with gardening activities. And, hey, da place is startin' to look like sumfin'!! :lol: Dunno know what yet. So exorsted, going to bed!! Night.

elye Community Regular

Good Morning, Penis-Posters!

Dear gawd, yes. . .. ....start to mention vagina microphones and anything penis, and oh! There are suddenly rare men posting. . ..! :lol::P

The last time I was in for my Mam and Pap visit, I was lying on the table, complaining about how awful the dreaded speculum (what a thing -- the word alone is terrifying) felt when being inserted and then opened up like an umbrella.

My elderly doctor listened patiently, then said, "you know, it probably wouldn't be nearly so stressful nor uncomfortable if you inserted it yourself"... .. and he handed me the large, stainless steel wrench/corkscrew/pliers instrument. :blink::blink:

I declined, after taking my first good look at this thing... . .I have always purposely NEVER looked at anything in that tray the nurse wheels in....looks too much like toolbelt paraphrenalia.

But the fact that he casually handed the speculum to me was jarring and unforgettable.

Either I come across as freakishly competent, or he may need to retire.

:lol:

Nikerler! How's our Alsy?

I just dropped DD off at the big tour bus parked in front of their school. The Arts students are off on a whirlwind visit to NYC. She is sharing her hotel room with four other 16-year old girls.

One bathroom.

Gaaaaaahhhhhh. . . ........

:blink::lol:

My husband's family has a cottage on Houghton Lake, so we go Up North several times every summer. It's totally commercial there though, more retiree than rustic--yes, there is a Wal-Mart in Prudinville :ph34r: .

I'm by Lake St. Clair on the bottom right of the thumb bone where it meets the palm ;) We're between Sterling Heights and Mt. Clemens, about 10-15 miles north of Detroit. Yupers are the Upper Peninsula folks (don't go there much--that Macinac bridge is wayyyy scary).

Raechull! You are not far from POeter and I.. . .....quite a do-able Psilly Psummit, methinks. . . . .. :)

Soooozle fell in a big rosebush! :o:angry: Take care o' those scratches, Soooze...

Jestgar Rising Star

Well heck. Another day without a natural disaster that will prevent me from going to work. Must think of some fun way to make the day pass.....

Ask boss about nipples?

Follow bread-pudding girl around asking if things work?

Sing muppet songs at the top of my lungs?

Sing

?
flourgirl Apprentice
. Curtains and a doorbell? :lol:

So if you girls have The Vagina Monologues, what is there for us pholks with Y chromosomes? Perhaps one of us suitably equipped should pen something and call it The Penis Soliloquies? To pee, or not to pee, that is the question. ;)

:lol::lol:Penile Poetry.. . . .. .....

Cocktale Hour?

I rather suspect that the penile monologues would sound rather primitive. I don't believe they've progressed beyond monosylibic narcissistic grunts. But then again, they may surprise us like the gorillas did. Lets teach them sign language and see what they come up with! :lol::lol:

flourgirl Apprentice
I had to tell my boss the most appallingly personal things when my fibroids were at their worst.

He seems to have survived, though.

You all are fortunate to have bosses with which to have conversations, especially humorous ones. I discovered from the start of this job that you can't tell the "bossy" anything. It gets discussed with everyone else. :angry:

BUTT!!! If you're having a good mental day you CAN have phun with such people :ph34r:


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jerseyangel Proficient
severe arm scraping and thorn-stabbing and........a gouge into me wee baby toe :huh:

:( Ouch :(

Your rendition of the whole episode was gripping--like I was right there! :lol:

Better not all get CC'd together .. ..it had an outhouse :ph34r:

You better be stickin' around, sir :D

I'm glad I'm not the only clod round here :lol:

:lol: Minimom said "clod" :P

Mam and Pap visit

:lol: Never heard that one before!

Lets teach them sign language and see what they come up with! :lol::lol:

That I'd like to see! You can get Leesigh in to help :D

Mornin Sillies--off to new doctor fer blood pressure check (how mundane....after the v. microphone discussion....) See ya'll later B)

flourgirl Apprentice

Ouch Psuessley! And how do those red road maps on yer skin look with yer new hair? Hope your not huring too bad!

Mam and Pap :lol: . And if there are no V/communications you can send a Mam-o-gram! :lol:

Mimm-e-o....you're not the only clod in the bunch by any over-reach stretch! I think I can fall trip over painted lines! We claim that the Klutz gene runs in our family, perhaps on the x chromosome. I have 4 sisters, and we all do wunderphull impromptu ballet! :P

mimommy Contributor

I am supposed to be going about my day, but just can't seem to give a hoot about laundry, errands, and return phone calls

so I'll just quietly sit here and type...

I want to GO TO there :lol: (a line from "30 Rock")

See Below...

it had an outhouse...Was quite idyllic.

Luv that you use the words 'idyllic' and 'outhouse' in the same sentence :lol:

Let 'er keep 'er head for now, Your Majesty. She may come in useful later :ph34r:

All right, tell me, are we talking about the left or right hand here? (She with precious little geographical knowledge of de GREAT lakes--all I knows is Michigan is the left one!

Shroom, glad your garden is comin' along :)

Yes, I do believe you are right--good tinkin' 'der, Neroli. You are oh-fishally named Royal Strategist.

Either hand will work, as long as the thumb points toward the right.

Good Morning, Penis-Posters!

The last time I was in for my Mam and Pap visit, I was lying on the table, complaining about how awful the dreaded speculum (what a thing -- the word alone is terrifying) felt when being inserted and then opened up like an umbrella.

My elderly doctor listened patiently, then said, "you know, it probably wouldn't be nearly so stressful nor uncomfortable if you inserted it yourself"... .. and he handed me the large, stainless steel wrench/corkscrew/pliers instrument. :blink::blink:

I declined, after taking my first good look at this thing... . .I have always purposely NEVER looked at anything in that tray the nurse wheels in....looks too much like toolbelt paraphrenalia.

But the fact that he casually handed the speculum to me was jarring and unforgettable.

Either I come across as freakishly competent, or he may need to retire.

Raechull! You are not far from POeter and I.. . .....quite a do-able Psilly Psummit, methinks. . . . .. :)

"Penis Posters" :D I had one on my wall when I was a teen. Twas dreamy...

"Mam and Pap" :lol::lol::lol: Your whole story was wackl!!

Yes, tis quite do-able. Tom, Suze, Jess and Patty could fly in to Detroit, then we'll drive (4 hours) to Toronto/Ottowa. Nikki and Shroom could meet us there. Where is everyone else?

I'm actually serious about this. I have two extra queen size beds in my basement--decent arrangements down there, too. Any are welcome to stay--could be high drama adventure!!

I rather suspect that the penile monologues would sound rather primitive. I don't believe they've progressed beyond monosylibic narcissistic grunts. But then again, they may surprise us like the gorillas did. Lets teach them sign language and see what they come up with! :lol::lol:

Like hairless Einsteins, solving quarks and defining our existence :lol:

If Toby Keith were a penis:

"I wanna talk about me

wanna talk about I

wanna talk about my two friends

and my one eye"

And if there are no V/communications you can send a Mam-o-gram! :lol:

I have 4 sisters, and we all do wunderphull impromptu ballet! :P

Mam-o-gram!! :lol:

Now there's a dance competition I'd like to see :D

Judyin Philly Enthusiast
Good Morning, Penis-Posters!

Dear gawd, yes. . .. ....start to mention vagina microphones and anything penis, and oh! There are suddenly rare men posting. . ..! :lol::P

The last time I was in for my Mam and Pap visit, I was lying on the table, complaining about how awful the dreaded speculum (what a thing -- the word alone is terrifying) felt when being inserted and then opened up like an umbrella.

My elderly doctor listened patiently, then said, "you know, it probably wouldn't be nearly so stressful nor uncomfortable if you inserted it yourself"... .. and he handed me the large, stainless steel wrench/corkscrew/pliers instrument. :blink::blink:

I declined, after taking my first good look at this thing... . .I have always purposely NEVER looked at anything in that tray the nurse wheels in....looks too much like toolbelt paraphrenalia.

But the fact that he casually handed the speculum to me was jarring and unforgettable.

Either I come across as freakishly competent, or he may need to retire.

a big rosebush! :o:angry: Take care o' those scratches, Soooze...

tHIS HAS GOT TO BE THE WINNER OF THE MOST FUNNY POST EVER

THANKS FOR THE LAUGHS

JUDY

jerseyangel Proficient
Mimm-e-o....you're not the only clod in the bunch by any over-reach stretch!

You said a mouthphul there, T. Just got home--got to the doc's office wifout getting lost--which is a miracle in and of itself since I'd never been there....but back at the grocery store after, I phorgot where I left the car--I was 3 rows off :blink:

Clod :lol:

If Toby Keith were a penis:

"I wanna talk about me

wanna talk about I

wanna talk about my two friends

and my one eye"

OMGawd!!!!! I was going to post that video yesterday at the height of all the penile talk!!!!! I SWEAR!!!!!! :lol: :lol: :lol:

elye Community Regular

Hi, Joooodie! Listen, Rayechull has invited us to stay in her basement -- you'd be right at home! :rolleyes:

Ask boss about nipples?

Sing

?

You all are fortunate to have bosses with which to have conversations, especially humorous ones.

Blonde song.. . ... :lol:

I wish I could converse with my various superiors the way many do.. . . ....they all are somewhat challenged by the English language, so I would need to commit to memory the French and Spanish words for nipple (mamelon), penis (la verge - -note that this word is ridiculously feminine), ovulation (ovulation - - not a problem). And I just cannot be bothered. . . .....

:rolleyes:

I rather suspect that the penile monologues would sound rather primitive. I don't believe they've progressed beyond monosylibic narcissistic grunts. But then again, they may surprise us like the gorillas did. Lets teach them sign language and see what they come up with!

:lol::lol:

Well, we could work with their monosyllabic grunts.. . . ...we'd need a Penile Interpreter. Now, I'm fairly good at deciphering foreigners' pronunciation and vocabulary cruxes, but historically I've never been able to clue in on what in hell penises are communicating. . . .......

Mornin Sillies--off to new doctor fer blood pressure check (how mundane....after the v. microphone discussion....) See ya'll later B)

Hey, Pattteigh! I'm gunnin' for a 115/65 for ya. . . . ...... :);)

"Penis Posters" :D I had one on my wall when I was a teen. Twas dreamy...

:lol::lol:

Hadda draw one in my Life Drawing course in university.... .. . just kept erasing, and erasing, as things....changed.. . . ......

Toby Keith's penis lyrics! :lol:

These posts have just been SO phunny!!! Why in hell are penii so hysterical, anyways??

elye Community Regular

Whup!! There's Oracle POeter!

POeter, why are penii so phunnee? :lol:

By the way, it is, in fact:

One Penis

Two penii

jerseyangel Proficient
Hi, Joooodie! Listen, Rayechull has invited us to stay in her basement -- you'd be right at home! :rolleyes:

El <snort>-o!!! :lol:

A Texas style snort :P

Jestgar Rising Star
Well, we could work with their monosyllabic grunts.. . . ...we'd need a Penile Interpreter. Now, I'm fairly good at deciphering foreigners' pronunciation and vocabulary cruxes, but historically I've never been able to clue in on what in hell penises are communicating. . . .......

Is it ever anything more than "NOW"?

jerseyangel Proficient
Is it ever anything more than "NOW"?

Hee! guys, she got ya there......

JNBunnie1 Community Regular
Is it ever anything more than "NOW"?

I was gonna say, penii don't have a plethora of subjects they'd like to discuss.... There's really only two.

So coconut chicken! Simple: Smash up a cup or two of honey nut rice chex, mix with 1/2 cup or so shredded coconut and garlic/salt/pepper. Then dip chicken pieces in coconut milk and then the dry mix (I only dip one side in the dry mix because if you coat the bottom it just gets all mushy anyway) and place in baking dish crunchy side up. Pour remaining coconut milk in pan around chicken, add pineapple chunks if you like, and bake 350 for 35 min, less if it's only a few pieces of chicken. The above measurements made a LOT of chicken, tone it down if you're not a glutton.

Sweet tatoes: Peel, boil, mash, add butter & maple syrup. :)

We also had broccoli.

JNBunnie1 Community Regular

Wanna know what I'm making tonite?

Jestgar Rising Star
Wanna know what I'm making tonite?

:droooloooo:

Yes!

Judyin Philly Enthusiast
Hi, Joooodie! Listen, Rayechull has invited us to stay in her basement -- you'd be right at home! :rolleyes:

:lol:

El <snort>-o!!! :lol:

A Texas style snort :P

WELL LADIES, I DON'T FIND BASEMENTS FUNNY IN THE LEAST! :ph34r::angry::o:(:angry:

NOW -----you 2 ladies i do find funny :lol:

Damn

TRYING TO TAKE THE TRASH UP AND IT KEEPS RAINING ON ME AND PLAYING WITH MY MIND.....SUN........THEN IT RAINS.......NOW DANK AND DARK..........GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.

LIKE BEING IN A BASEMENT :ph34r:

YES BUNNIE I'D LOVE TO KNOW WHAT'S FOR DINNER.

MY COMPUTER KEEPS GOING BACK TO BIG LETTERS....WHAT'S UP

DID I JINX MYSELF

THERE IT IS AGAIN. :blink:

DingoGirl Enthusiast
I rather suspect that the penile monologues would sound rather primitive. I don't believe they've progressed beyond monosylibic narcissistic grunts. But then again, they may surprise us like the gorillas did. Lets teach them sign language and see what they come up with!

:lol: narcissistic grunts!!!! :lol:

Your rendition of the whole episode was gripping--like I was right there!

I don't think I mentioned the part about holding a clove cigarette in one hand, did I :ph34r:

See, I was keeping it safe from breakage, hence the more dramatic fall occurred than would have been necessary

:lol:

also trying not to step on Skittle Skat.....

actually was punctured in food by TWO large thorns :blink:

kinda hurts to walk today :lol:

I am supposed to be going about my day, but just can't seem to give a hoot about laundry, errands, and return phone calls

so I'll just quietly sit here and type...

"Penis Posters" I had one on my wall when I was a teen. Twas dreamy...

"

:lol: :lol: whose penii were they?

and......glad to see ya got your priorities straight, Mimms ;)

I wish I could converse with my various superiors the way many do.. . . ....they all are somewhat challenged by the English language, so I would need to commit to memory the French and Spanish words for nipple (mamelon), penis (la verge - -note that this word is ridiculously feminine), ovulation (ovulation - - not a problem). And I just cannot be bothered. . . .....

:lol: :lol: love this! why did I never know it was called La Verge?

POeter, why are penii so phunnee?

By the way, it is, in fact:

One Penis

Two penii

*snort* :lol: :lol:

Padtea did a TEXAS snort!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

good day sills - - got nowt else - - must run

more later!

JNBunnie1 Community Regular
WELL LADIES, I DON'T FIND BASEMENTS FUNNY IN THE LEAST! :ph34r::angry::o:(:angry:

NOW -----you 2 ladies i do find funny :lol:

Damn

TRYING TO TAKE THE TRASH UP AND IT KEEPS RAINING ON ME AND PLAYING WITH MY MIND.....SUN........THEN IT RAINS.......NOW DANK AND DARK..........GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.

LIKE BEING IN A BASEMENT :ph34r:

YES BUNNIE I'D LOVE TO KNOW WHAT'S FOR DINNER.

MY COMPUTER KEEPS GOING BACK TO BIG LETTERS....WHAT'S UP

DID I JINX MYSELF

THERE IT IS AGAIN. :blink:

Poor Joodie.... Yer computer's messin wit you, ain't it?

I'll write up what I do for dinner later, I'm never sure what's gonna happen til I do it.... I'm thinkin white lasagna.

jerseyangel Proficient
TRYING TO TAKE THE TRASH UP AND IT KEEPS RAINING ON ME

I can't believe how much rain you guys have had lately!

I don't think I mentioned the part about holding a clove cigarette in one hand, did I :ph34r:

Uh, no young lady, you did not! :P

Mtndog Collaborator

Hello Psillies! Long time no-see, a poop in from me!

I have been reading along on my gmail. All hail Queen Ray-chull-on-the-bust-of Queen Elizabeth :lol:

Suzzle had a date (and a clove and a very expensive cognac), no?

Bunnie's on 'roids- don't go getting all Schwarzenagar (sp?) on us! How was the Cape? Hope yer sumac goes away soon. I'll writ a limerick fer ya

I really want to scratch off my face

Cause sumac has put it all out of place

I'll pop a Prednisone

Try not to feel stoned

And smack that sumac to space!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :(

The Penile Soliloquies :lol: :lol:

Alsey's away. Em, your dad is OK?

Not much psilly- I think it's because the phiremen didn't show upon Saturday- the noive! However I had a lovely dinner with Gerard Butler on Sunday (P.S. I Love you- soooooooo cute!) though and that will have to suffice.

We are hosting my BIL's 40th birthday party here Saturday night and there is MUCH cleaning to be done HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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      @catnapt, Wheat germ has very little gluten in it.  Gluten is  the carbohydrate storage protein, what the flour is made from, the fluffy part.  Just like with beans, there's the baby plant that will germinate  ("germ"-inate) if sprouted, and the bean part is the carbohydrate storage protein.   Wheat germ is the baby plant inside a kernel of wheat, and bran is the protective covering of the kernel.   Little to no gluten there.   Large amounts of lectins are in wheat germ and can cause digestive upsets, but not enough Gluten to provoke antibody production in the small intestines. Luckily you still have time to do a proper gluten challenge (10 grams of gluten per day for a minimum of two weeks) before your next appointment when you can be retested.    
    • knitty kitty
      Hello, @asaT, I'm curious to know whether you are taking other B vitamins like Thiamine B1 and Niacin B3.  Malabsorption in Celiac disease affects all the water soluble B vitamins and Vitamin C.  Thiamine and Niacin are required to produce energy for all the homocysteine lowering reactions provided by Folate, Cobalamine and Pyridoxine.   Weight gain with a voracious appetite is something I experienced while malnourished.  It's symptomatic of Thiamine B1 deficiency.   Conversely, some people with thiamine deficiency lose their appetite altogether, and suffer from anorexia.  At different periods on my lifelong journey, I suffered this, too.   When the body doesn't have sufficient thiamine to turn food, especially carbohydrates, into energy (for growth and repair), the body rations what little thiamine it has available, and turns the carbs into fat, and stores it mostly in the abdomen.  Consuming a high carbohydrate diet requires additional thiamine to process the carbs into energy.  Simple carbohydrates (sugar, white rice, etc.) don't contain thiamine, so the body easily depletes its stores of Thiamine processing the carbs into fat.  The digestive system communicates with the brain to keep eating in order to consume more thiamine and other nutrients it's not absorbing.   One can have a subclinical thiamine insufficiency for years.  A twenty percent increase in dietary thiamine causes an eighty percent increase in brain function, so the symptoms can wax and wane mysteriously.  Symptoms of Thiamine insufficiency include stunted growth, chronic fatigue, and Gastrointestinal Beriberi (diarrhea, abdominal pain), heart attack, Alzheimer's, stroke, and cancer.   Thiamine improves bone turnover.  Thiamine insufficiency can also affect the thyroid.  The thyroid is important in bone metabolism.  The thyroid also influences hormones, like estrogen and progesterone, and menopause.  Vitamin D, at optimal levels, can act as a hormone and can influence the thyroid, as well as being important to bone health, and regulating the immune system.  Vitamin A is important to bone health, too, and is necessary for intestinal health, as well.   I don't do dairy because I react to Casein, the protein in dairy that resembles gluten and causes a reaction the same as if I'd been exposed to gluten, including high tTg IgA.  I found adding mineral water containing calcium and other minerals helpful in increasing my calcium intake.   Malabsorption of Celiac affects all the vitamins and minerals.  I do hope you'll talk to your doctor and dietician about supplementing all eight B vitamins and the four fat soluble vitamins because they all work together interconnectedly.  
    • Florence Lillian
      Hi Jane: You may want to try the D3 I now take. I have reactions to fillers and many additives. Sports Research, it is based in the USA and I have had no bad reactions with this brand. The D3 does have coconut oil but it is non GMO, it is Gluten free, Soy free, Soybean free and Safflower oil free.  I have a cupboard full of supplements that did not agree with me -  I just keep trying and have finally settled on Sports Research. I take NAKA Women's Multi full spectrum, and have not felt sick after taking 2 capsules per day -  it is a Canadian company. I buy both from Amazon. I wish you well in your searching, I know how discouraging it all is. Florence.  
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