Jump to content

  • Welcome to Celiac.com!

    You have found your celiac tribe! Join us and ask questions in our forum, share your story, and connect with others.



  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A1):

    Celiac.com Sponsor (A1-M):

  • Get Celiac.com Updates:
    Support Our Content
    eNewsletter
    Donate

She Told Me I Was "weird"

jasonD2

By jasonD2
in Coping with Celiac Disease

Recommended Posts

jasonD2 Experienced
jasonD2
Posted

So as some of you might recall I had a date and was concerned about discussing the whole gluten thing. Well we've been dating now a month and last night we went out and she grabbed a late dinner since she had not eaten. We were talking about food and stuff and i casually mentioned that I do not eat dairy and gluten..didnt get into the whole celiac thing and just said i was allergic to wheat and dont eat much dairy and that its just a personal choice. since i was never officially diagnosed as celiac i feel comfortable saying i am just intolerant or allergic even though i live the lifestyle of someone w/ celiac. Anyway, we were having a fun and playful conversation and after I told her she seemed surprised and called me weird...but then again she has called me weird a few times already but again just in a playful fun kinda way. so my fear is that she really doesnt understand the scope of my problem and that i need to be super careful with CC and eating out. as things progress i am worried she will see the true nature of my problem and how it impacts my life on a daily basis & prevents me from doing certain things- i dont know how she will handle this. i mean this girl eats everything. any suggestions would be appreciated

j

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):


dilettantesteph Collaborator
dilettantesteph
Posted

It was hard enough with my spouse. I can't imagine dealing with it in a dating situation. Good luck. If she is worth it, she will understand and respect your needs.

ravenwoodglass Mentor
ravenwoodglass
Posted

Take it date by date for now. If she really likes you and you really like her it will work out.

bbuster Explorer
bbuster
Posted

It was hard enough with my spouse. I can't imagine dealing with it in a dating situation. Good luck. If she is worth it, she will understand and respect your needs.

I agree! This is great advice. (I still have trouble with my spouse's awareness sometimes!)

I was going to answer that my daughter understands and is very aware and attuned to being gluten-free even though her brother has Celiac and no one else in our family does. But she is only 13 so she can not date!!

But seriously, a nice person who truly cares for you will do whatever it takes.

March102010 Newbie
March102010
Posted

I agree with the others. If she likes you, she will learn how to help you. Seriously, everyone has problems that they have to deal with; I'm sure she has some of her own.

Aphreal Contributor
Aphreal
Posted

I was wondering how this went. Honestly I don't think she gets it. If she did, I don't think she would be calling you (or the allergy and choices you make) weird. The adjective is strange within this context.

But none the less, I too, would take it one date at a time and be sure not to make a big deal about it. If it is brought up again then I would take that and go with it. Explain the severity of your allergy and tell it's not weird, it's everyday life for you.

I am sorry you are fretting over this. My family and I are getting to the point now where it's becoming clear that this IS going to impact everyone. Tension is starting to erupt. I hope it's short lived as we all adjust.

Tiff

precious831 Contributor
precious831
Posted

So as some of you might recall I had a date and was concerned about discussing the whole gluten thing. Well we've been dating now a month and last night we went out and she grabbed a late dinner since she had not eaten. We were talking about food and stuff and i casually mentioned that I do not eat dairy and gluten..didnt get into the whole celiac thing and just said i was allergic to wheat and dont eat much dairy and that its just a personal choice. since i was never officially diagnosed as celiac i feel comfortable saying i am just intolerant or allergic even though i live the lifestyle of someone w/ celiac. Anyway, we were having a fun and playful conversation and after I told her she seemed surprised and called me weird...but then again she has called me weird a few times already but again just in a playful fun kinda way. so my fear is that she really doesnt understand the scope of my problem and that i need to be super careful with CC and eating out. as things progress i am worried she will see the true nature of my problem and how it impacts my life on a daily basis & prevents me from doing certain things- i dont know how she will handle this. i mean this girl eats everything. any suggestions would be appreciated

j

I'm sorry to hear that. It was very hard for my husband to accept it, how much more for just people who are dating. I haven't read all the replies but I think if she's worth it then it might be ok to wait it out and that she will eventually understand. I think most people don't understand and once they are educated, the come around eventually, slowly. So you'll have to work on her on this slowly. And if she likes you and cares for you she'll probably make the effort to understand your condition.

Good luck and I hope everything works out.

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):


jststric Contributor
jststric
Posted

I'm sorry to hear that. It was very hard for my husband to accept it, how much more for just people who are dating. I haven't read all the replies but I think if she's worth it then it might be ok to wait it out and that she will eventually understand. I think most people don't understand and once they are educated, the come around eventually, slowly. So you'll have to work on her on this slowly. And if she likes you and cares for you she'll probably make the effort to understand your condition.

Good luck and I hope everything works out.

I suspect she's just never been aware of anyone else with such issues. If she knew the stats of 1:130 it might help make her realize you certainly aren't 1:1,000,000....in a negative way, anyway. And when she realizes that a majority of gluten-challenged people are also other foods-intolerant, it may help. Did she actually say YOU are weird or that "that's" weird? I can't imagine directly telling someone they are weird when they share such information. Maybe she was talking about your intolerance is weird. Then its simply a matter of opening her eyes to the fact that its much more common than she knows....its just not mainstream knowledge yet.

vbecton Explorer
vbecton
Posted

Well, if she persists with the "weird" I would make a short funny comeback like, "yeah, I probably am weird for not wanting to be up all night with uncontrollable D...how bizarre." But, then again I'm a major smarta** so you may not want to listen to me!

When my husband suggests I'm making a bigger deal about all this than necessary, I go cuddle with him when I have horrible gas. Just want to make sure he suffers with me if he won't be supportive :lol:

glutenfr3309 Rookie
glutenfr3309
Posted

When my husband suggests I'm making a bigger deal about all this than necessary, I go cuddle with him when I have horrible gas. Just want to make sure he suffers with me if he won't be supportive :lol:

lol. maybe i should try that with my bf!

i don't think my bf is 100% supportive of me yet but i think he's slowly coming around. i'm not sure if he ever will. when he is mean about it i just remind him that this is lifelong for me and that i need someone who will be supportive. we don't live together and usually only see each other 3 times a week so he isn't with me all the time. he thinks i need to 'live' and that i make it more difficult for myself. however, i'm really not eating any different than i used to before! now, i just have the alternative go-to foods for pasta, sweets, and breads. so really to me it's not eating that much different!

i think it will come to a point like everyone says- if it's meant to be it will work out. gluten-free is a lifelong thing for you--she may not be.

cassP Contributor
cassP
Posted

Well, if she persists with the "weird" I would make a short funny comeback like, "yeah, I probably am weird for not wanting to be up all night with uncontrollable D...how bizarre."

LOLOL

conniebky Collaborator
conniebky
Posted

you all dont' know each other that well yet and are still in the 'best behavior' and 'polite ' stage.

she sounds like a cool girl, she probably just couldn't think of anything else to say.

Little by little you will feel more comfortable explaining it to her and little by little, she'll understand it.

Don't fret so about it. It's all good. Have FUN!

jasonD2 Experienced
jasonD2
Posted
  • Author

nah like i said she was playful about it- didnt seem like it bothered her. i basically told her i just eat a certain way and do what works best for me & left it at that

jasonD2 Experienced
jasonD2
Posted
  • Author

ugh!

jasonD2 Experienced
jasonD2
Posted
  • Author

well she said she always likes spending time with me and tells me im a lot of fun so cant be all that bad

kareng Grand Master
kareng
Posted

Does she smile and touch your arm when she says, " ( giggle) . Oh Jason, you're so weird!"? If so, substitute "cute" for "weird". ;)

tarnalberry Community Regular
tarnalberry
Posted

/thumbs up to kareng for the translation.

"Weird" has so many contextual uses - don't assume it's bad. You already said she was being playful. Communication is FAR more than the words used, and her tone of voice/behavior tells you what she means by it.

miles2go Contributor
miles2go
Posted

"Weird" has so many contextual uses - don't assume it's bad.

Mine would laugh evilly and ask if I wanted to see "really weird."

And I wouldn't want him any other way. :P

GlutenFreeManna Rising Star
GlutenFreeManna
Posted

Does she smile and touch your arm when she says, " ( giggle) . Oh Jason, you're so weird!"? If so, substitute "cute" for "weird". ;)

This is my take on the situation too. Maybe she likes "weird" people? :D

anabananakins Explorer
anabananakins
Posted

It does take a while to get used to this - and it does seem kind of weird at first to have problems with the foods that everyone else seems to eat without problem (though they are probably in denial!) I think she sounds cool and as you get to know each other better you'll be more comfortable with it - and she'll get used to it.

Besides, while I agreed with the others that you can substitute 'weird' for 'cute', even if someone says "wow, that's weird you can't eat those foods", at least it shows they think it's somewhat interesting. I hate the "wow, sucks to be you" response because it's so negative. I am currently making myself jacket potato for breakfast. There will be heaps of butter on it. Is my life so much worse than someone who would be having buttered toast for breakfast? I think not!

Have fun :-)

Roda Rising Star
Roda
Posted

nah like i said she was playful about it- didnt seem like it bothered her. i basically told her i just eat a certain way and do what works best for me & left it at that

You must not be to "weird" since you still are going on dates! :P

lucia Enthusiast
lucia
Posted

well she said she always likes spending time with me and tells me im a lot of fun so cant be all that bad

It sounds *all* good. :)

Totally normal people are boring. When you write fiction, you're supposed to add a kind of "tick" to a character to make them more interesting to the reader.

precious831 Contributor
precious831
Posted

Next time she says "weird" ask her what it means. :) Maybe she thinks you're cool!

munchkinette Collaborator
munchkinette
Posted

I'm curious- how old are you two? If I heard "that's weird" from a 15 year old I wouldn't think anything of it. If I heard that response from a 35 year old, I would think it an odd response.

Either way, some people still haven't heard of gluten, so it may seem out of the ordinary to them. We talk and think about gluten constantly.

Aphreal Contributor
Aphreal
Posted

When my husband suggests I'm making a bigger deal about all this than necessary, I go cuddle with him when I have horrible gas. Just want to make sure he suffers with me if he won't be supportive :lol:

LOL thats some good stuff woman.

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Go to topic listing

  • Get Celiac.com Updates:
    Support Celiac.com:
    Join eNewsletter
    Donate
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A17):
    Celiac.com Sponsor (A17):



    Celiac.com Sponsors (A17-M):



  • Recent Activity

    1. tiffanygosci
      - tiffanygosci posted a topic in Coping with Celiac Disease
      0

      New Celiac Mama in My 30s

      Hello all! My life in the last five years has been crazy. I got married in 2020 at the age of 27, pregnant with our first child almost two months later, gave birth in 2021. We had another baby in April of 2023 and our last baby this March of 2025. I had some issues after my second but nothing ever made me think, "I should see a doctor about this." After...
    2. knitty kitty
      - knitty kitty replied to klmgarland's topic in Dermatitis Herpetiformis
      8

      Help I’m cross contaminating myself,

      On the AIP diet, all processed foods are eliminated. This includes gluten-free bread. You'll be eating meats and vegetables, mostly. Meats that are processed, like sausages, sandwich meats, bacons, chicken nuggets, etc., are eliminated as well. Veggies should be fresh, or frozen without other ingredients like sauces or seasonings. Nightshade vegetables...
    3. Yaya
      - Yaya replied to Jhona's topic in Introduce Yourself / Share Stuff
      29

      Does anyone here also have Afib

      Thank you for responding and for prayers. So sorry for your struggles, I will keep you in mine. You are so young to have so many struggles, mine are mild by comparison. I didn't have Celiac Disease (celiac disease) until I had my gallbladder removed 13 years ago; at least nothing I was aware of. Following surgery: multiple symptoms/oddities appeared including...
    4. larc
      - larc replied to Jhona's topic in Introduce Yourself / Share Stuff
      29

      Does anyone here also have Afib

      When I accidentally consume gluten it compromises the well-being of my heart and arteries. Last time I had a significant exposure, about six months ago, I had AFib for about ten days. It came on every day around dinner time. After the ten days or so it went away and hasn't come back. My cardiologist offered me a collection of pharmaceuticals at the time...
    5. klmgarland
      - klmgarland replied to klmgarland's topic in Dermatitis Herpetiformis
      8

      Help I’m cross contaminating myself,

      So I should not eat my gluten free bread? I will try the vitamins. Thank you all so very much for your ideas and understanding. I'm feeling better today and have gathered back my composure! Thank you kitty kitty I am going to look this diet up right away. And read the paleo diet and really see if I can make this a better situation then it currently...
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A19):


  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      131,918
    • Most Online (within 30 mins)
      7,748
    Dottie78
    Newest Member
    Dottie78
    Joined
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A20):

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      121.5k
    • Total Posts
      1m
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A22):



  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A21):


  • Upcoming Events

  • Posts

    • tiffanygosci
      New Celiac Mama in My 30s

      By tiffanygosci · Posted

      Hello all! My life in the last five years has been crazy. I got married in 2020 at the age of 27, pregnant with our first child almost two months later, gave birth in 2021. We had another baby in April of 2023 and our last baby this March of 2025. I had some issues after my second but nothing ever made me think, "I should see a doctor about this." After having my last baby this year, my body has finally started to find its new rhythm and balance...but things started to feel out of sorts. A lot of symptoms were convoluted with postpartum symptoms, and, to top it all off, my cycle came back about 4m postpartum. I was having reoccurring migraines, nausea, joint pain, numbness in my right arm, hand and fingers, tummy problems, hives. I finally went to my PCP in August just for a wellness check and I brought up my ailments. I'm so thankful for a doctor that listens and is thorough. He ended up running a food allergy panel, an environmental respiratory panel, and a celiac panel. I found out I was allergic to wheat, allergic to about every plant and dust mites, and I did have celiac. I had an endoscopy done on October 3 and my results confirmed celiac in the early stages! I am truly blessed to have an answer to my issues. When I eat gluten, my brain feels like it's on fire and like someone is squeezing it. I can't think straight and I zone out easily. My eyes can't focus. I get a super bad migraine and nausea. I get so tired and irritable and anxious. My body hurts sometimes and my gut gets bloated, gassy, constipated, and ends with bowel movements. All this time I thought I was just having mom brain or feeling the effects of postpartum, sleep deprivation, and the like (which I probably was having and the celiac disease just ramped it up!) I have yet to see a dietician but I've already been eating and shopping gluten-free. My husband and I have been working on turning our kitchen 100% gluten-free (we didn't think this would be so expensive but he assured me that my health is worth all the money in the world). There are still a few things to replace and clean. I'm already getting tired of reading labels. I even replaced some of my personal hygiene care for myself and the kids because they were either made with oats or not labeled gluten-free. I have already started feeling better but have made some mistakes along the way or have gotten contamination thrown into the mix. It's been hard! Today I joked that I got diagnosed at the worst time of the year with all the holidays coming up. I will just need to bring my own food to have and to share. It will be okay but different after years of eating "normally". Today I ordered in person at Chipotle and was trying not to feel self-conscious as the line got long because they were following food-allergy protocols. It's all worth it to be the healthiest version of myself for me and my family. I would be lying if I said I wasn't a little overwhelmed and a little overloaded!  I am thankful for this community and I look forward to learning more from you all. I need the help, that's for sure!
    • knitty kitty
      Help I’m cross contaminating myself,

      By knitty kitty · Posted

      On the AIP diet, all processed foods are eliminated.  This includes gluten-free bread.  You'll be eating meats and vegetables, mostly.  Meats that are processed, like sausages, sandwich meats, bacons, chicken nuggets, etc., are eliminated as well.  Veggies should be fresh, or frozen without other ingredients like sauces or seasonings.  Nightshade vegetables (eggplant, potatoes, tomatoes, peppers) are excluded.  They contain alkaloids that promote a leaky gut and inflammation.  Dairy and eggs are also eliminated.   I know it sounds really stark, but eating this way really improved my health.  The AIP diet can be low in nutrients, and, with malabsorption, it's important to supplement vitamins and minerals.  
    • Yaya
      Does anyone here also have Afib

      By Yaya · Posted

      Thank you for responding and for prayers.  So sorry for your struggles, I will keep you in mine.  You are so young to have so many struggles, mine are mild by comparison.  I didn't have Celiac Disease (celiac disease) until I had my gallbladder removed 13 years ago; at least nothing I was aware of.  Following surgery: multiple symptoms/oddities appeared including ridges on fingernails, eczema, hair falling out in patches, dry eyes, upset stomach constantly and other weird symptoms that I don't really remember.  Gastro did tests and endoscopy and verified celiac disease. Re heart: I was born with Mitral Valve Prolapse (MVP) and an irregular heartbeat, yet heart was extremely strong.  It was difficult to pick up the irregular heartbeat on the EKG per cardiologist.  I had Covid at 77, recovered in 10 days and 2 weeks later developed long Covid. What the doctors and nurses called the "kickoff to long Covid, was A-fib.  I didn't know what was going on with my heart and had ignored early symptoms as some kind of passing aftereffect stemming from Covid.  I was right about where it came from, but wrong on it being "passing".  I have A-fib as my permanent reminder of Covid and take Flecainide every morning and night and will for the rest of my life to stabilize my heartbeat.   
    • larc
      Does anyone here also have Afib

      By larc · Posted

      When I accidentally consume gluten it compromises the well-being of my heart and arteries. Last time I had a significant exposure, about six months ago, I had AFib for about ten days. It came on every day around dinner time. After the ten days or so it went away and hasn't come back.  My cardiologist offered me a collection of pharmaceuticals at the time.  But I passed on them. 
    • klmgarland
      Help I’m cross contaminating myself,

      By klmgarland · Posted

      So I should not eat my gluten free bread?  I will try the vitamins.  Thank you all so very much for your ideas and understanding.  I'm feeling better today and have gathered back my composure! Thank you kitty kitty   I am going to look this diet up right away.  And read the paleo diet and really see if I can make this a better situation then it currently is.  
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

NOTICE: This site places This site places cookies on your device (Cookie settings). on your device. Continued use is acceptance of our Terms of Use, and Privacy Policy.