Allergy or Preference? Waiter asks

[atheresa]

I have been to several restaurants and some have gluten free menus and some don't. sometimes I am given that wonderful notebook of anything you could possibly be allergic to .  When I ask for something from the gluten free menu, I am often asked, "allergy or preference?"  Does this seem a little personal? I am not celiac but will have a migraine, diarrhea, and 2 days of depression. This is none of their business.  My preference would be to order a real pizza and a real beer. 

I always answer allergy, but it always bothers me. What do you answer?

[Darren]

It's always best to remind ourselves that nobody ever knows anything about celiac or gi until they actually get it, so we can't blame others for not being experts on it. I don't eat out much due to having celiac but when I do I simply tell them that while I would love to have regular food or a beer, I simply can't as it will make me sick, and it's not an allergy but needs to be treated the same way. No need in giving anyone much more info than that, and I never take offence...they don't know what they don't know and at least some of them ask as it helps them know if they have to be super careful or not since many folks with no issues just don't want to eat gluten and there's no need for the restaurant to be extra careful for them.  So I suggest you take it all with a grain of salt. Since you are choosing to eat out, you need to share this info with them, so not sure why it bothers you beyond the regular hassle we must live with. The alternative is to say nothing and get sick, or don't eat out.

[kareng]

I have Celiac.  It is not an allergy.  But it is silly to give a waiter a long winded explanation.  All they really want to know is if the cook needs to go to extra trouble to make my food safe.  " Allergy" is a word they understand and often have a process to deal with.

 

I just say that I have a medical need to be gluten-free.  In the case of Celiac, even a small amount, like taking a piece of bread off a salad, is enough to make us sick.  If you are lucky enough to not have that much sensitivity, you can decide how to answer that question.  There are a lot of people who eat gluten-free because it helps them but a little doesn't matter.  So they can take a burger off a bun, or have a bite of a friends cake.  

[cristiana]

My nutritionalist told me to say allergy because some people only understand that word.  I can't quite bring myself to say it, though!  I have never been asked the preference or allergy question myself - yet .  

I haven't dared eat out for months but now I am again and what I now find myself doing is ordering and then when everyone else has put their orders in catch the member of staff before they disappear into the kitchen and just explain I am sorry to be awkward, but please can you tell the chef that if any gluten gets into the food I will be ill for days.   I think the strategy is working.

[DougE]

I am never offended by this question.  I know there are a lot of people who have gone gluten-free just to lose weight or simply believe it is healthier.   Restaurants cater to this group and often list items gluten-free that do not fit the strict definition for those who react to it.  I appreciate the fact that they recognize that some of us have to be more cautious.  Just say, "Allergy".

[cap6]

I always say "allergy"  as the establishment will take extra precautions.  A lot of people eat g.f. by choice or have gluten intolerance and maybe don't have to be as careful .  It's just easier to say "allergy". 

[GF-Cheetah Cub]

I am also never offended by this question.   I believe they ask this question to find out if they need to be careful with cross contamination.  So I actually like it if my waiter asks this question.

In fact, when the waiter does not ask, I volunteer the information that my daughter is allergic (she has celiac) to gluten, and to please tell the kitchen to be very careful when preparing her gluten-free meal.

[TheJamieJay]

I am a server and I also have celiac disease. Although I understand that it is a sensitive question I do ask it, only because I have to. Many people just come out to eat and abide by a trendy diet - I hate it but gluten-free is a "trendy" diet now (although the trend has put more options on the shelves which is nice). Often I hear "preferrence" so I go through all the motions anyways to later watch them share a burger off their friend's place.

As a server, I can tell you that it's best to say allergy. In that case most restaurants will be much more careful with your food. If you give any ifs ands or buts the server will likely not take you seriously (I've heard my coworkers). Its infuriating, yet it is what it is. 

Edited March 22, 2016 by TheJamieJay

[Nikki2777]

I would appreciate getting this question (yes, I know it's not really an allergy), because it makes it clear that cross-contamination would be an issue.  In your case, you can legitimately say 'allergy' (or as legitimately as someone with Celiac) as it makes you sick.  

[mbrookes]

At my local Five Guys, I told the counter guy that I had to avoid gluten for medical reasons. I was ordering a burger with no bun and some fries. He yelled back "Allergy Alert!" and every line cook immediately changed gloves and cleaned their work space. Will I go back? You bet I will!

[silk]

  On 3/15/2016 at 10:56 AM, atheresa said:

I have been to several restaurants and some have gluten free menus and some don't. sometimes I am given that wonderful notebook of anything you could possibly be allergic to .  When I ask for something from the gluten free menu, I am often asked, "allergy or preference?"  Does this seem a little personal? I am not celiac but will have a migraine, diarrhea, and 2 days of depression. This is none of their business.  My preference would be to order a real pizza and a real beer. 

I always answer allergy, but it always bothers me. What do you answer?

Expand Quote  

I laughed out loud at the 'little notebook' comment!? It has been interesting to see how much progress has actually been made over the past 10 years that there is even a notebook to be offered or a restaurant to eat in that will accommodate our 'allergy'. 10 years ago I feared that I would never eat in a restaurant again.  But the notebook comment is spot on.  Hopefully within the next 10 years restaurants will evolve enough to offer us a menu that clearly lists the delicious and extensive offerings that they have lovingly prepared just for us...and not just an ingredient list with nutritional values that take longer to read than War and Peace.   I am grateful that there are places to go that at least make the effort.  Who knows?  Eventually there may be restaurants which will have to offer menus with GLUTEN options available!

[cap6]

Since moving to Central Oregon we eat out more than in the past, mainly because we have to drive 30 minutes to get to the next "big" town and like to indulge in a lunch out. That said, we have found more and more places that offer a separate gluten free menu which makes it so much easier.  Even when ordering off of the g.f. menu I always state "I am ordering from the g.f. menu and this is an allergy, not a choice for me!."    I learned to do this the hard way.  We have friends who are gluten intolerant and are not at all careful.  They will order from a g.f. menu and then ask for a side of something that obviously has gluten in it.   I want to be sure the kitchen takes ME seriously!  

[Anna Walker]

I've talked to a lot of waiters about this and I think it's always a safe bet to say I have celiac and if they give you a blank stare say "allergy." I'm always pleasantly surprised by how many people in the food industry know someone or are familiar with it now.

That said I ALWAYS ask a million questions like is there anything with gluten fried in the fryer? Does the chef use a new pot of water for the gluten-free pasta? (most don't!), are the gluten containing pizzas (contamination!) made near anything else? (sometimes the salads)

[Grizzly]

I don’t like that they ask this because even if someone did not have celiac disease and they wanted gluten out for other health reasons, they should be just as careful because there not really respecting someone’s choice of being gluten free. There going to be less careful cause your didn’t say you get sick from it? Not cool in my opinion. Incase anyone on here also Is open to healing their Celiac look up “medical medium” or Anthony Williams. 
 Unfortunately for me keeping gluten Out of my diet wasn’t enough and I got worse after a year since I was Diagnosed. I’m sure like all of you on here when you found out you had celiac you were like. Huh? How? Why would by body all of a sudden turn on me? It doent make sense cause you had gluten your whole life... well your body doent turn on you. It’s actually virus that feed off gluten in your body. You need to take out all the foods that feed the viruses for your diet in order  to kill them off And stop feeding them, and then after they have gone to sleep you can enjoy whatever you want again. Unfortunately all the yummy stuff we love feeds them, but the point is you can actually heal celiac if you cleanse your body for awhile with healthy god given foods like fruits and veggie, the answer has always been in nature to heal. Iv been cleansing for 10 months now and it saved my life. Just look Up “medical medium” all the info is free and you don’t have to suffer anymore or miss out on life. More doctors are starting to learn the truth now because they didnt know the true  and Are taught  to tell people their bodies are attacking itself which it’s total crap... your body always will heal you, you get a cut it will heal. When your sick your body is full of toxins from our environment and virus and if we don’t cleanse them out every so often we get sick. Makes sense right? rather then one day your fine and then next you have all these problems out of no where. I feel you cause I went through it all myself. Heal yourself look up Anthony Williams medical medium. It’s not a health fad. It’s true healing info that actually makes sense and gives you true answers to why you are sick. More doctors are now using it to help heal people around the world. You can find him on All social networks and he has a ton of books too that you can get for free at your library or on amazon. Be open if you can you won’t have to suffer anymore. 

[Scott Adams]

Hello @Grizzly and welcome to the forum!

I agree that when any customer asks for gluten-free food the food provided should be gluten-free. It's silly to ask if it's a medical thing...it should make no difference in how their restaurant workers are trained and prepare gluten-free foods--they should always be gluten-free if they offer gluten-free options.

Regarding viruses in your body needing to be killed to treat celiac disease, this isn't the case. There are viruses that research has shown which may somehow trigger the onset of celiac disease, but people with the disease do not need to worry about treating any viruses after they get it, and the gluten-free diet works for most celiacs and is the medically acceptable treatment for it.

Also, I looked at Anthony Williams who seems to be heavily into "cleansing" diets, and using certain cleanse diets to treat certain conditions. Since celiac disease can't be cured his diets would not work as a treatment, but perhaps as long as they are gluten-free may not hurt, as long as you are getting enough nutrients and eating a well balanced diet, which I kind of doubt is possible after looking at his stuff.