Yeah, But Yours Wasn't Real

[Kimbalou]

Am I being too sensitive? At work during a break the other day a co-worker said she was having macaroni and cheese for breakfast. I said "oh, I had that too!" (I've been eating Amy's gluten-free rice mac and cheese...it's so good) after I said that, another co-worker said "Yeah, but your's wasn't real!" I just said "well, it was real to me! Amy's has a lot of good gluten-free food!"

I know I am depressed lately, so I am very sensitive to what people say...but I am curious to know if this would have bothered you? I guess people think pasta isn't REAL if it isn't WHEAT? Come on!

I am ready to eat in a different place at work because it seems like 95% of the time the focus is on what I am eating even when I don't bring food topics up! Can't people just eat without talking about the ingredients of food or ask me questions about what I can eat? Yes, I told most of my co-workers about Celiac..it just seems like the subject always comes up!

[kareng]

Wow! Then the calories aren't real either!

[Cara in Boston]

If she was having Kraft mac and cheese, yours was probably closer to "real" than hers . . .

[Marilyn R]

I can so relate to your post! I work with nurses and have made it a point to have lunch before their official lunch hour (1 pm - 2pm). Inevitably, somebody walks to the lunch room and quizzes me about my food. In some respects, I wish I'd never said anything about my diet, and that my co-workers weren't so wrapped up in what I'm eating. In other ways, I feel like I's educating people that should know.

I've started questioning them about their food choics too, but only if they challenge me with an insidius remark about what I'm eating.

[IrishHeart]

I might have said "If it isn't real, then what the hell was that in my bowl? dammit, am I hallucinating again? "

You seem to be getting bombarded with "ignorance" lately, kimbaloo...sorry, honey. (hug) I saw your other post.

You said you are depressed and maybe too sensitive...could be!

I know when I feel this way, ordinarily stupid stuff people say rolls off my back or I have a snappy, sarcastic comeback--but sometimes, it gets to me, too.

Have you tried saying something privately to this person telling her that it hurts your feelings to have your food issues pointed out in front of everyone?

(For the record, my doc says celiacs eat better than most people. so what does she know)

Next time, enjoy your mac and cheese and savor it, saying loudly YUM, YUM, YUM

while chewing.

As my Dad would have said about people who are rude, "screw 'em, kiddo! let it go!" (ooh, can I say that on here? if not, I'll issue a warning to myself )

[Katrala]

Any chance they could have been referencing homemade vs. frozen, etc?

I live by the "pick your battles" mantra in many ways - this includes what I allow to get under my skin.

[Fairy Dancer]

I would have replied with: "yes, my food was an hallucination and you imagined the whole thing...you might want to see a dr about that!"

[faithforlife]

I'd be upset. I have to give people the Benefit of the doubt. This Is strange for me too! All the questioning makes me second guess myself so I have to put it in its place.

[sariesue]

I tend to call my gluten free foods fake, but my household is split so we have both regular and gluten free bread and some other things. Since I find having to call my special foods gluten free as depressing I call them fake. I think it makes me feel better when they don't live up to my very fond memories of wheat based products. To me if it's fake then it's not going to taste the same.

But, if it really bothers you some of the posters above had really creative suggestions.

[Kimbalou]

The comment was meant to compare the difference between wheat mac and cheese and non-wheat. I work with nurses too, I am one! But, I can't believe how rude some of them can be about the Celiac issue. It doesn't make sense to me! I told my co-workers when I was diagnosed...hoping they would be considerate about it. Most people are ok about it, but some of my co-workers are awful. I also wish people just wouldn't talk about food when they are eating. I am more sensitive now, for sure. Another co-worker was eating a cookie and said "Oh, this cookie is so good" right in front of me. But, I know I am hypersensitive to comments like this. The "fake" comment made me feel worse. I have to let it go.

[IrishHeart]

Another co-worker was eating a cookie and said "Oh, this cookie is so good" right in front of me.

Just imagine her growing fat arse from that cookie and laugh to yourself.

I have 4 friends who are nurses (3 women and 1 man). They are very giving and intelligent people, but totally unaware of celiac and no matter how hard I try to explain it, it just does not register. 3 of them are gluten intolerant themselves and have OBVIOUS symptoms, but won't do a thing about it.

It is unkind and offensive what she said, hon --and sadly, we cannot change people's personalities. Only how we respond to them.

All of us have stories such as yours and we do understand.

And your food is not "fake". It is sustenance. It keeps you healthy.

((hugs))

[BeFree]

Aw sweetie I'm sorry. *hugs* Take it with a grain of salt though, a lot of people that aren't on this diet simply just don't have any idea what gluten-free food is. They think of it is something "fake" or "artificial" like a Diet Coke vs. a "real" Coke. They don't mean to hurt your feelings, I'm sure. Don't give up. The more you eat "your" food around them, the more they will come to learn that it is just like theirs, but with different ingredients. They might even take a taste one day and decide they like it! Be patient.

[Skylark]

The comment was meant to compare the difference between wheat mac and cheese and non-wheat. I work with nurses too, I am one! But, I can't believe how rude some of them can be about the Celiac issue. It doesn't make sense to me! I told my co-workers when I was diagnosed...hoping they would be considerate about it. Most people are ok about it, but some of my co-workers are awful. I also wish people just wouldn't talk about food when they are eating. I am more sensitive now, for sure. Another co-worker was eating a cookie and said "Oh, this cookie is so good" right in front of me. But, I know I am hypersensitive to comments like this. The "fake" comment made me feel worse. I have to let it go.

You do not need to tolerate this if you don't want to. I'm pretty sure what you're experiencing would legally be considered disability harassment, since it's so pervasive that you want to go eat somewhere else. It would fall under the hostile work environment laws. You need to politely ask your coworkers to stop bugging you about your diet. If the harassment continues, go to HR and explain the situation.

I have also gotten adept at turning conversations away from food. I would strongly suggest you cultivate the skill. Skim headlines in the morning so you have something interesting and relevant to talk about.

[Kimbalou]

Skylark, that's a good point. I am definitely going to steer the conversation in another direction at meal times. I also think I am very sensitive.

You would think medical people would get it, but crazy how some don't!

[Kimbalou]

Just imagine her growing fat arse from that cookie and laugh to yourself.

I have 4 friends who are nurses (3 women and 1 man). They are very giving and intelligent people, but totally unaware of celiac and no matter how hard I try to explain it, it just does not register. 3 of them are gluten intolerant themselves and have OBVIOUS symptoms, but won't do a thing about it.

It is unkind and offensive what she said, hon --and sadly, we cannot change people's personalities. Only how we respond to them.

All of us have stories such as yours and we do understand.

And your food is not "fake". It is sustenance. It keeps you healthy.

((hugs))

Funny, i will have to think about how fat these people could get when they eat all the donuts and pastries the doctors bring in too!

[Marilyn R]

I've worked in the medical field for years, but I'm not a clinician. After two years gluten-free, it seems like my neighbors know more about celiac disease than my doctors do.

I lost a good RN friend of more than 10 years in this battle. I told my DP that I understood why. She deals with sickness everday she works. It's too much for her to handle with friends on her time off. I think we'll reconnect down the road.

I

[Juliebove]

I actually had a Dr. say this to me when I took my daughter in for allergy testing to see if she had outgrown some of the allergens. "But your husband is Italian! Italians eat pasta made with wheat! He won't like that at all!" This Dr. was from India if that makes a difference. Probably not but perhaps they have a different attitude towards food than we do? Anyway I replied, "Well... He has been eating the rice or corn pasta and hasn't noticed a difference. He likes it just fine!" She acted like it was a miracle.

[IrishHeart]

Funny, i will have to think about how fat these people could get when they eat all the donuts and pastries the doctors bring in too!

I was once a fatty myself--from all that gluteny wheat--but getting celiac took care of that. I was almost skeletal for a while there.

I did not mean to be flippant about obesity (before anyone gets upset with me )I was merely trying to give our Kimbaloo something to "go to" in her head ---something amusing---so she does not take all this to heart.

Humor often diffuses bombs.

Well, hon, we gave you our best thoughts. Steer the conversation away, speak to them personally about it, blow it off entirely, or envision wide arses.

In any case, hopefully it will get easier for you. We have enough to deal with; we don't need anymore stress.

All the best, IH

[Pauliewog]

I am sitting here eating my own lunch as I read these posts. I made myself a Thai salad. One thing I love about eating gluten free is that all my food is "real." Nothing I ate was processed. My rice noodles were the only thing I didn't make myself and according to the bag are made from "rice and water." And, if I don't say so myself, it was delicious.

As to the Mac and Cheese, here are the ingredients from the Kraft page. It seems to me it is a meal more of chemicals than of "real" food. You could point that out next time if someone makes a comment!!!!!!

Ingredients: ENRICHED MACARONI PRODUCT (WHEAT FLOUR, GLYCEROL MONOSTEARATE, NIACIN, FERROUS SULFATE [iRON], THIAMIN MONONITRATE [VITAMIN B1], RIBOFLAVIN [VITAMIN B2], FOLIC ACID); CHEESE SAUCE MIX (WHEY, CORN SYRUP SOLIDS, MALTODEXTRIN, PALM OIL, MODIFIED FOOD STARCH, SALT, MILKFAT, MILK PROTEIN CONCENTRATE, CALCIUM CARBONATE, CONTAINS LESS THAN 2% OF MEDIUM CHAIN TRIGLYCERIDES, SODIUM TRIPOLYPHOSPHATE, WHEY PROTEIN CONCENTRATE, CITRIC ACID, GUAR GUM, SODIUM PHOSPHATE, LACTIC ACID, CALCIUM PHOSPHATE, MILK, ARTIFICIAL FLAVOR, YELLOW 5, YELLOW 6, APOCAROTENAL ENZYMES, CHEESE CULTURE, NATURAL FLAVOR). CONTAINS: WHEAT, MILK.

[dani nero]

it's like saying rice porridge isn't real because you didn't use oats haha.

Honestly you were being nice by not laughing at her intelligence. You're the one who did her a favor :-P

[lynnelise]

I love that Amy's mac and cheese. Maybe it's for the best that other people think it's "not real". If they discover it tastes better than the gluteny Kraft kind they may buy it up!

There are a few ladies at my work that inspect my lunch. They always crinkle their nose up and ask if it's good. I always wonder why they think I would bring it if I didn't like it? These women eat ramen noodles most days so I just remind myself that they are clearly not food people and their opinions are suspect! lol

[IrishHeart]

There are a few ladies at my work that inspect my lunch. They always crinkle their nose up and ask if it's good.

Next time, try this

"Oh gosh, no!!....it tastes like a sweaty sock dragged through dog poo, ....but (now, pause, heave a heavy sigh and put your hand to your brow dramatically ) it's the cross I bear."

Work up a tear if you can.

If they say "Oh poor dear. Is there anything we can do?"

Say, "wash my car, do all my paperwork and give me $50 bucks?"

It'll be fun!

:lol:

[ChristenDG]

It's funny, cause little jokes like that make me feel better! I also have always had a tendency to feel more comfortable in the presence of "humor."

I got a new job position just as I was going gluten-free and I'm in a completely new building with completely different people now. I've chosen so far to keep my gluten-freeness (I know that's not a real term, but oh well) to myself. I just don't want people to make a big deal of it, or think I'm making a big deal of it.

[Jestgar]

It's funny, cause little jokes like that make me feel better!

Reminds me of a non-food-related story someone told.

She had just started a new job, and had to tell her boss that she was pregnant. I'll just tell it as she told it:

Friend: "Well, you know that medical appointment I had? So.....it turns out I'm pregnant."

New boss: "oh.........and.......is there a father?" (friend is unmarried)

Friend: "Yes, donor 294"

New boss: "..........oh..........is..... that your own personal list?"

She says he's still her favorite boss (although I don't think he's her boss anymore).

[IrishHeart]

Friend: "Well, you know that medical appointment I had? So.....it turns out I'm pregnant."

New boss: "oh.........and.......is there a father?" (friend is unmarried)

Friend: "Yes, donor 294"

New boss: "..........oh..........is..... that your own personal list?"

:lol:

hmm, IH wonders.....does this mean that her baby "isn't real" either??