Jump to content
  • Welcome to Celiac.com!

    You have found your celiac tribe! Join us and ask questions in our forum, share your story, and connect with others.




  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A1):



    Celiac.com Sponsor (A1-M):


  • Get Celiac.com Updates:
    Support Our Content
    eNewsletter
    Donate

The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original


TriticusToxicum

Recommended Posts

elye Community Regular

...Yeti footprints in the sand...... :lol::lol:


Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):



Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):



  • Replies 51k
  • Created
  • Last Reply
tom Contributor
:lol: :lol: :lol: YETI POETRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There once was a Yeti from Spain

His inseam was giant it was claimed

Yet when Emily measured him

It accidentally pleasured him

And now he no longer

Complains!

To some it may seem,

The point's the inseam,

That measurement down to the ankle.

But I must submit,

In truth and to wit,

The subject is that which does dangle.

:P

elye Community Regular
Boy that Yeti sure looks better if we DON'T SHAVE him!!!! OMG...reminds me of frisking the wookie. Emily- I KNOW you were here for that. Must find it!!! Oh..here it is:Open Original Shared Link

now shall we think of all the innuendos that shaving your yeti brings? :lol::lol::lol:

Hug like a yeti :lol::lol::lol::lol::lol: OMG.

:lol::lol::lol: YETI POETRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There once was a Yeti from Spain

His inseam was giant it was claimed

Yet when Emily measured him

It accidentally pleasured him

And now he no longer

Complains!

Ahhh! Hilarious, Bev...I OFTEN think of our Frisking the Wookie thread, one of the funniest, I would say, in recent memory. I believe, no surprise, that Richard began that particular madness, as well...

Emily now a yeti-pleasurer! Mygawd, just how many hats can I be expected to wear? :lol:

Yeti confetti, thrown into the air,

From a great white beast, with billowing hair,

He lopes down the aisle, to a sweet wedding chorus,

And ends his parade,

In the arms of Chuck Norris.

:huh::lol:

Jestgar Rising Star
Open Original Shared Link

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

How did I miss this?

Jestgar Rising Star

OK EVERYONE STOP THIS RIGHT NOW!!

I'm laughing so hard there are tears running down my face and people are looking at me askance.

And who will be braiding the seashells into the yeti's hair?

Nikki?

tom Contributor
Yeti confetti, thrown into the air,

From a great white beast, with billowing hair,

He lopes down the aisle, to a sweet wedding chorus,

And ends his parade,

In the arms of Chuck Norris.

:huh::lol:

AAAAAAAAIIIIIEEE!!!

Emily! Both you and Queen "It accidentally pleasured him" Bev have me Guffawing!! :lol::D:lol:

LMAO

elye Community Regular

Okay, Bev...you'll be with me on this one: The new phrase to coin for 2007...

LET THE YETI LEAD.

We have to officially define it:

To act on a hunch:

"She booted me out...she could somehow tell that I'd been with someone else. She let the yeti lead..."

OR

To lose all sense of propriety:

"Man, lookit the loser she's making out with! Talk about letting the Yeti lead!"

OR

A suggestive invitation:

"C'mon...follow me. Let my Yeti lead".

OR

To have a sudden bathroom crisis:

"Gaaaack!! Outta my way...Yeti leading...Yeti leading...!"


Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):



Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):



Jestgar Rising Star

To have followed someone else's suggestion against your better judgment.

I can't believe we went to Saskatchewan in January! I totally let the yeti lead on that one.

Mtndog Collaborator

BEAUTIFUL YETI POETRY!!!!!! We've got Jestgar crying- sweet! And there is guffawing, snorking and snickering!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, Bev...you'll be with me on this one: The new phrase to coin for 2007...

LET THE YETI LEAD.

We have to officially define it:

To act on a hunch:

"She booted me out...she could somehow tell that I'd been with someone else. She let the yeti lead..."

OR

To lose all sense of propriety:

"Man, lookit the loser she's making out with! Talk about letting the Yeti lead!"

OR

A suggestive invitation:

"C'mon...follow me. Let my Yeti lead".

OR

To have a sudden bathroom crisis:

"Gaaaack!! Outta my way...Yeti leading...Yeti leading...!"

Let's see......it could be "The Yeti was leading that parade."

As in:

"She booted me out...she could somehow tell that I'd been with someone else. The yeti was leading that parade.."

"Gaaaack!! Outta my way...Yeti leading my parade...Yeti leading my parade...!"

OR it could mean a place where lots off BS (poop) gets slung around!

As in:

The Yeti led the parade in that presidential debate.

OR

We had a couple of drinks and let the Yeti lead THAT parade.

Or seductive:

Let my yeti lead your parade, baby!

tom Contributor
Okay, Bev...you'll be with me on this one: The new phrase to coin for 2007...

LET THE YETI LEAD.

To have followed someone else's suggestion against your better judgment.

I can't believe we went to Saskatchewan in January! I totally let the yeti lead on that one.

:lol: OMG comPLETEly ROFL here at these!!! :lol: (yes . .. . .a touch of tears also)

Emily & Jess have incapacitated meeeeeee!

Way to start a subtopic Em!! <can i call u em?>

I'm glad I'm not still at my coffeehouse. Earlier I'm sure some there had to think I was out of my mind, barely containing what could've been minutes of wild giggles.

(Hey!!! I guess this means the perfuming effects weren't so bad after all! Yay! :) )

I'd love to add to the "Let the Yeti Lead" definitions & examples but I need to calm down and probably eat. <phew! catching breath finally>

Edit P.S. OMG Bev too! The tears have restarted!

Darn210 Enthusiast

Trying to stifle my chuckles as kids and husband are in the room while I sneak a peak at the thread . . .

Truely awe-inspiring Yeti-poetry . . . totally can not compete. :lol::lol::lol:

QUOTE (elye @ Oct 16 2007, 04:15 PM)

Yeti confetti, thrown into the air,

From a great white beast, with billowing hair,

He lopes down the aisle, to a sweet wedding chorus,

And ends his parade,

In the arms of Chuck Norris.

Really paints a picture doesn't it. Richard is going to have a day tomorrow defending his poor Chuck Norris. :lol:

Outstanding!!! Bravo!!! Encore!!! Encore!!! <holding lighter up and stomping feet>

DingoGirl Enthusiast

OH.....................my..................holy.........................LORD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

:lol: :lol: :huh::lol: :lol:

Just HOW are all of you brilliant Yeti-brains coming up w/ this poetry?

:lol:

**********************

I'm back. Perfect, Stepford neighbor just did one of her famous pop-ins. Thank God I was dressed and house is quite clean. Otherwise, Dingy hides in back. :ph34r: But, I did have to hide the Yeti. That, my friends, she would NOT have understood.

:lol:

Green12 Enthusiast

You guys are carazy silly silly-yaks!

I got nothing.

My head is not in such a silly place, so nothing to add here.

Carry on.........(translation: Let the Yetti lead!)

elye Community Regular

:lol: Way to start a subtopic Em!! <can i call u em?>

You bet!! :) My dear friends call me this, and you guys are, honestly, unique and special friends...Tom, you just lead that Yeti on this one....

Daughter-of-TheLight Apprentice

*is laughing so much that crying and rolling on the floor are immeminent* ROFL!!! I want to braid the seashells into the yeti's hair!!!!! I officially volunteer myself! *grins* I have baskets and baskets and boxes of seashells. Do you want the spiky white twisty kind, the peach oyster-like kind, the fiery red-and-orange ones, *goes on for a long period of time* ... or the blue and purple ones that i painted? (yeah, i have a lot of seashells. i mean a LOT of seashells.)

DingoGirl Enthusiast
*is laughing so much that crying and rolling on the floor are immeminent* ROFL!!! I want to braid the seashells into the yeti's hair!!!!! I officially volunteer myself! *grins* I have baskets and baskets and boxes of seashells. Do you want the spiky white twisty kind, the peach oyster-like kind, the fiery red-and-orange ones, *goes on for a long period of time* ... or the blue and purple ones that i painted? (yeah, i have a lot of seashells. i mean a LOT of seashells.)

:rolleyes: Yay Katie!

I think I speak for Amanda when I say use ALL COLOURS of seashells! Yes! YOU are the one to braid the yeti's stinky hair!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

blueeyedmanda Community Regular

You guys are too much for me tonight!!!

I love this thread!!!

tom Contributor
I want to braid the seashells into the yeti's hair!!!!! I officially volunteer myself! *grins* I have baskets and baskets and boxes of seashells. Do you want the spiky white twisty kind, the peach oyster-like kind, the fiery red-and-orange ones, *goes on for a long period of time* ... or the blue and purple ones that i painted? (yeah, i have a lot of seashells. i mean a LOT of seashells.)

Oh Daughter_of_TheSea!!!!!!!

I'd think an artfully arranged variety would be purrrrrrrrrr-fect. (Yeti's are known to almost purr w/ the right under-chin scritch)

But I must admit, I'd yield to the taste of someone more aesthetically inclined.

Plenty o' Yeti to go around!!!

P.S. Do you also have a bucket of shark's teeth? My dad used to live in Venice FL and would find them all the time.

P.P.S. I still can't try to add to the "Let the Yeti Lead" theme w/out near incapacitive (incapaciTAtive?) laughter . . . . :lol:

Darn210 Enthusiast

Susie, Excellent Av . . . We can clearly see both hands and there is no wineee . . . waaaiiiit a minute . . . Do you have a flask in your back pocket?

tom Contributor
. . . .. the yeti's stinky hair!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"Stinky hair"????? :emoticon-pinching-own-nose:

Oh no, that won't do at ALL for Amanda's nuptials!! :o

I'll get out the full raingear & walk the hominid beast through the carwash mySELF if that's what it takes!

Stinky? Not on MY watch! I won't allow it!! <_<

And I'm now in that curious position of wanting to clean up some before the professional housecleaners show up tomorrow :lol:

(but is IS mostly just moving things so they have access to what really needs attn)

blueeyedmanda Community Regular

I would also like my Coon cat to be part of our parade....can someone carry him on a pillow like the king he thinks he is?

And we should get HR Puff n Stuff too!!!!

elye Community Regular

:lol::lol::lol: Excellent...My 10 year-old just huffed off to bed after he sat in front of his math homework, doodling, playing with his calculator, clearly avoiding the job ahead. I had been walking by, telling him to get it done. Finally, I stood up from said computer, walked over to his workdesk and calmly said, "Jack...if you don't lead this yeti....who will?!" Beautiful. Interesting how Yetis and Wookies are noticeably similar, and here both appear...too tired to make any humoUrous sense of this maintenant. Will ponder it in bed. No postulating while I'm asleep! No fair, don't wanna miss a thing! :lol:

Darn210 Enthusiast
I would also like my Coon cat to be part of our parade....can someone carry him on a pillow like the king he thinks he is?

And we should get HR Puff n Stuff too!!!!

Chuck Norris would look nice holding a fluffy kitty. Dang he's going to be busy. I wonder what his appearance fee is? :huh:

blueeyedmanda Community Regular
Chuck Norris would look nice holding a fluffy kitty. Dang he's going to be busy. I wonder what his appearance fee is? :huh:

LOL! I am sure we can arrange for collateral of some sort :)

DingoGirl Enthusiast
Susie, Excellent Av . . . We can clearly see both hands and there is no wineee . . . waaaiiiit a minute . . . Do you have a flask in your back pocket?

;) 'tis a closely-guarded secret, matey and ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR to your av!!!!!!!!!!!!

I would also like my Coon cat to be part of our parade....can someone carry him on a pillow like the king he thinks he is?

And we should get HR Puff n Stuff too!!!!

OMG! :o Just had a grand mal flash to childhood and that most perplexing of characters, HR Puff nStuff. What WERE they smoking???????????????? :lol: and WTH WAS that thing?

Finally, I stood up from said computer, walked over to his workdesk and calmly said, "Jack...if you don't lead this yeti....who will?!"

oh dear gawd......our madness IS infiltrating REAL LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :lol:

Chuck Norris would look nice holding a fluffy kitty. Dang he's going to be busy. I wonder what his appearance fee is? :huh:

APPEARANCE FEE???? the HELL you say!! He shows up for us FOR FREE, completely HONOURED to be asked!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

frisk the wookie :lol:

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Get Celiac.com Updates:
    Support Celiac.com:
    Join eNewsletter
    Donate

  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A17):
    Celiac.com Sponsor (A17):





    Celiac.com Sponsors (A17-M):




  • Recent Activity

    1. - Mari replied to Jmartes71's topic in Related Issues & Disorders
      15

      My only proof

    2. - Rejoicephd commented on Jefferson Adams's article in Gluten-Free Cooking
      1

      Your Complete Gluten-Free Thanksgiving Plan: Recipes, Tips & Holiday Favorites

    3. - marion wheaton replied to marion wheaton's topic in Gluten-Free Foods, Products, Shopping & Medications
      3

      Are Lindt chocolate balls gluten free?

    4. - trents replied to marion wheaton's topic in Gluten-Free Foods, Products, Shopping & Medications
      3

      Are Lindt chocolate balls gluten free?


  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A19):



  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      132,422
    • Most Online (within 30 mins)
      7,748

    HAUS
    Newest Member
    HAUS
    Joined

  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A20):


  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      121.5k
    • Total Posts
      1m

  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A22):





  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A21):



  • Who's Online (See full list)

  • Upcoming Events

  • Posts

    • Mari
      Years  ago a friend and I drove north into Canada hoping to find a ski resort open in late spring,We were in my VW and found a small ski area near a small town and started up this gravelled road up a mountain. We  got about halfway up and got stuck in the mud. We tried everything we could think of but an hour later we were still stuck. Finally a pickup came down the road, laughed at our situation, then pulled the VW free of the mud. We followed him back to the ski area where where he started up the rope ski lift and we had an enjoyable hour of skiing and gave us a shot of aquavit  before we left.It was a great rescue.  In some ways this reminds me of your situation. You are waiting for a rescue and you have chosen medical practitioners to do it now or as soon as possible. As you have found out the med. experts have not learned how to help you. You face years of continuing to feel horrible, frustrated searching for your rescuer to save you. You can break away from from this pattern of thinking and you have begun breaking  away by using some herbs and supplements from doTerra. Now you can start trying some of the suggestions thatother Celiacs have written to your original posts.  You live with other people who eat gluten foods. Cross contamination is very possible. Are you sure that their food is completely separate from their food. It  is not only the gluten grains you need to avoid (wheat, barley, rye) but possibly oats, cows milk also. Whenever you fall back into that angry and frustrated way of thinking get up and walk around for a whild. You will learn ways to break that way of thinking about your problems.  Best wishes for your future. May you enjpy a better life.  
    • marion wheaton
      Thanks for responding. I researched further and Lindt Lindor chocolate balls do contain barely malt powder which contains gluten. I was surprised at all of the conflicting information I found when I checked online.
    • trents
      @BlessedinBoston, it is possible that in Canada the product in question is formulated differently than in the USA or at least processed in in a facility that precludes cross contamination. I assume from your user name that you are in the USA. And it is also possible that the product meets the FDA requirement of not more than 20ppm of gluten but you are a super sensitive celiac for whom that standard is insufficient. 
    • BlessedinBoston
      No,Lindt is not gluten free no matter what they say on their website. I found out the hard way when I was newly diagnosed in 2000. At that time the Lindt truffles were just becoming popular and were only sold in small specialty shops at the mall. You couldn't buy them in any stores like today and I was obsessed with them 😁. Took me a while to get around to checking them and was heartbroken when I saw they were absolutely not gluten free 😔. Felt the same when I realized Twizzlers weren't either. Took me a while to get my diet on order after being diagnosed. I was diagnosed with small bowel non Hodgkins lymphoma at the same time. So it was a very stressful time to say the least. Hope this helps 😁.
    • knitty kitty
      @Jmartes71, I understand your frustration and anger.  I've been in a similar situation where no doctor took me seriously, accused me of making things up, and eventually sent me home to suffer alone.   My doctors did not recognize nutritional deficiencies.  Doctors are trained in medical learning institutions that are funded by pharmaceutical companies.  They are taught which medications cover up which symptoms.  Doctors are required to take twenty  hours of nutritional education in seven years of medical training.  (They can earn nine hours in Nutrition by taking a three day weekend seminar.)  They are taught nutritional deficiencies are passe' and don't happen in our well fed Western society any more.  In Celiac Disease, the autoimmune response and inflammation affects the absorption of ALL the essential vitamins and minerals.  Correcting nutritional deficiencies caused by malabsorption is essential!  I begged my doctor to check my Vitamin D level, which he did only after making sure my insurance would cover it.  When my Vitamin D came back extremely low, my doctor was very surprised, but refused to test for further nutritional deficiencies because he "couldn't make money prescribing vitamins.". I believe it was beyond his knowledge, so he blamed me for making stuff up, and stormed out of the exam room.  I had studied Nutrition before earning a degree in Microbiology.  I switched because I was curious what vitamins from our food were doing in our bodies.  Vitamins are substances that our bodies cannot manufacture, so we must ingest them every day.  Without them, our bodies cannot manufacture life sustaining enzymes and we sicken and die.   At home alone, I could feel myself dying.  It's an unnerving feeling, to say the least, and, so, with nothing left to lose, I relied in my education in nutrition.  My symptoms of Thiamine deficiency were the worst, so I began taking high dose Thiamine.  I had health improvement within an hour.  It was magical.  I continued taking high dose thiamine with a B Complex, magnesium. and other essential nutrients.  The health improvements continued for months.  High doses of thiamine are required to correct a thiamine deficiency because thiamine affects every cell and mitochondria in our bodies.    A twenty percent increase in dietary thiamine causes an eighty percent increase in brain function.  The cerebellum of the brain is most affected.  The cerebellum controls things we don't have to consciously have to think about, like digestion, balance, breathing, blood pressure, heart rate, hormone regulation, and many more.  Thiamine is absorbed from the digestive tract and sent to the most important organs like the brain and the heart.  This leaves the digestive tract depleted of Thiamine and symptoms of Gastrointestinal Beriberi, a thiamine deficiency localized in the digestive system, begin to appear.  Symptoms of Gastrointestinal Beriberi include anxiety, depression, chronic fatigue, headaches, Gerd, acid reflux, gas, slow stomach emptying, gastroparesis, bloating, diarrhea and/or constipation, incontinence, abdominal pain, IBS,  SIBO, POTS, high blood pressure, heart rate changes like tachycardia, difficulty swallowing, Barrett's Esophagus, peripheral neuropathy, and more. Doctors are only taught about thiamine deficiency in alcoholism and look for the classic triad of symptoms (changes in gait, mental function, and nystagmus) but fail to realize that gastrointestinal symptoms can precede these symptoms by months.  All three classic triad of symptoms only appear in fifteen percent of patients, with most patients being diagnosed with thiamine deficiency post mortem.  I had all three but swore I didn't drink, so I was dismissed as "crazy" and sent home to die basically.   Yes, I understand how frustrating no answers from doctors can be.  I took OTC Thiamine Hydrochloride, and later thiamine in the forms TTFD (tetrahydrofurfuryl disulfide) and Benfotiamine to correct my thiamine deficiency.  I also took magnesium, needed by thiamine to make those life sustaining enzymes.  Thiamine interacts with each of the other B vitamins, so the other B vitamins must be supplemented as well.  Thiamine is safe and nontoxic even in high doses.   A doctor can administer high dose thiamine by IV along with the other B vitamins.  Again, Thiamine is safe and nontoxic even in high doses.  Thiamine should be given if only to rule Gastrointestinal Beriberi out as a cause of your symptoms.  If no improvement, no harm is done. Share the following link with your doctors.  Section Three is especially informative.  They need to be expand their knowledge about Thiamine and nutrition in Celiac Disease.  Ask for an Erythrocyte Transketolace Activity test for thiamine deficiency.  This test is more reliable than a blood test. Thiamine, gastrointestinal beriberi and acetylcholine signaling.  https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC12014454/ Best wishes!
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

NOTICE: This site places This site places cookies on your device (Cookie settings). on your device. Continued use is acceptance of our Terms of Use, and Privacy Policy.